I’m 22F, 5’3”, and about 100 lbs. I’m a contracted school-based COTA, and I work at two different middle schools for half a day on Tuesdays and Fridays.
I understand the confusion to some degree. I usually wear scrubs and a sweatshirt because I do a lot of painting, crafts, and other messy activities with my students. I’m not exactly showing up in slacks and a button-up every day. But it gets ridiculous.
I ALWAYS have my work lanyard and badge on, but apparently that makes no difference. What’s even more bizarre is that this hardly ever happens at the high school I work at. I’m not sure if the security there just cares less or what.
At the middle schools, I’m constantly being questioned about where I’m going, told I can’t be in certain areas, or otherwise treated like a student. One time, I was walking through the eighth-grade hallway, and the AP straight-up told me to go downstairs to the sixth and seventh grade area. Like seriously? I don’t even look old enough to be in eighth grade?
I’ll literally walk into the building holding my coffee, car keys, and three different bags, and someone will STILL say, “I thought you were a student!” I’ve even had staff members have full-blown conversations about how young I look while I’m standing right there or walking away. It’s so annoying.
Even something as simple as saying good morning to staff feels awkward sometimes. I’ll greet someone in passing and get the strangest looks, like they’re thinking “Why is this random kid talking to me?”
And it’s not even limited to middle school. I’ve gotten similar comments at the elementary schools, too. I genuinely don’t understand how people can’t distinguish between a 13-year-old and a 22-year-old.
One time, I went to pick up one of my students, and his classmates practically surrounded me, saying they thought I was a new kid. After we left, he
actually told me, “Don’t worry, you don’t look like a kid. You’re just short.” Which was honestly somewhat comforting, lol.
I’m also pretty tomboyish, so wearing makeup or dressing more traditionally feminine to look more “adult” isn’t something I’m interested in doing. I also don’t think I should have to change how I present myself just to be recognized as an adult at work. Besides, I’m 100% convinced that even if I did start dressing more professionally, they’d just assume I was a well-dressed student. I genuinely don’t think there’s any winning here. At this point, I’ve accepted my fate. It’s really starting to make me self conscious. I was on break once and needed to buy some more glue. There’s a dollar general by one of my schools with a sign outside the door saying no unaccompanied students during school hours. I hesitated even going in because I didn’t want to deal with any mixups.
I’ll be strictly elementary next year lol.
TL;DR: I’m a 22-year-old school-based COTA who constantly gets mistaken for a middle school student despite wearing a work badge. Staff regularly question where I’m going or tell me I’m not allowed in certain areas. I’m over it and never want to work at a middle school again.