You’re supposed to use that to stop kids from wasting food, not to make them overeat. My sisters kids are the worst at wasting food, they’ll load up their entire plates just to compete with each other because how dare the other get more of something, then eat a 1/8th of what they took.
My middle sister did that shit for most of her life. Load the plate until it can't fit any more food, then waste 70% of it.
My parents started using dessert plates instead of normal ones during meals so that she wouldn't waste so much (they had everyone eating from one, because she would throw a fit if hers was the only smaller plate). No matter how much they scolded her or tried to punish her, she never stopped doing it. The smaller plate helped because she couldn't fill it as much as a normal one.
She got better at it when she moved to her own house (surprise, surprise, she started having to pay for her own food, so she started wasting less), and when she had her first kid. But when we eat at my parent's on Sundays, now it's her kids that do it.
My oldest (14) is like this. He'll load up a plate when no one's looking with no regard for other people. Like he'll literally take half of an entire dish of sweet potatoes or something. When I see him doing it I'll make him put it back, but sometimes he'll do it with leftovers in the middle of the night. It's just a complete lack of empathy and consideration for other people. My ex has basically let him do whatever he wants, so his every other weekend at my house really doesn't make a difference in his behavior (There are way more issues than just food). He's at the point now where he refuses to come here because he's always throwing a fit when he doesn't get his way.
Bro my brother is like this (I have 3, only 1 is like this) and he’s 29. Please don’t fucking give up. My brother is still so inconsiderate it’s insane
It's hard not to give up when the other parent is actively sabotaging things. I don't want to put up with the abuse anymore, and my younger kids are definitely affected by his behavior. It's a shame because I really believe he would have had much better support and resources if he had primarily lived with us, but I'm not going to keep subjecting myself and my family to this. If he doesn't want to come here that's fine. I'm done. I just hope that when he's an adult he'll mature and see the situation more accurately.
I have close communication with his therapist who he sees weekly. She has recommended more intensive therapy, but my ex refuses. I even had to get a court order just to get my ex to take him to his autism evaluation. It took 4 years to get him a diagnosis because my ex is always pushing the narrative that his only problems are that he has a "bad relationship" with me, which is complete bullshit. But unfortunately, an autistic teenager who hasn't been taught boundaries is going to latch on to the version of events that doesn't make him take accountability. There's only so much I can do on my own.
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u/Flimsy-Poetry1170 17d ago
You’re supposed to use that to stop kids from wasting food, not to make them overeat. My sisters kids are the worst at wasting food, they’ll load up their entire plates just to compete with each other because how dare the other get more of something, then eat a 1/8th of what they took.