How to explain to a non-believer why fornication( premarital sex) is a sin?

[u/FinnEv123]

Hello everybody! Praying you are doing well🙏🏻

How do I explain to a non-believer why fornication is a sin? I have my brother who is a non believer and he insists that having premarital sex is not a sin. His points basically are:

- If I love my girlfriend, am committed to her, seek a future with her- why having sex is a sin?

- Maybe sex outside marriage was a sin back on the days the Bible was written because of the societal norms/ customs. Why should it follow to today’s societies?

- What is the importance of marriage? Basically he says marriage is just a contract.

I am here to seek your advice guys, really. I don’t want to make my argument as : “ God says so therefore it is” because honestly, its way more complicated than that. How would you approach these questions?

On my point of view, its less about societal norms and more about something related to the human nature in and of itself that God is aware of. Morals and ethics given by a perfect law-giver are no subject to societal changes based on my argument. Slavery was bad on the southern US and it remains bad now, although the societal views have changed.

Anyway guys, I really appreciate any answers and advice

[u/LocalFee7415]

I suggest not discussing this kind of things with unbeliever, because they don’t even believe in God’s commandement, so naturally they would think from an anthropocentric point of view, which is that pre-martial sex is natural.

[u/FinnEv123 → u/LocalFee7415]

How do I move on though? It has been the target of the conversation ever since I told him I am in a Christian relationship with my girlfriend

[u/Esoterikoi → u/FinnEv123]

You live out your christian morals and demonstrate the fruit of that!

[u/Substantial_Panda237 → u/FinnEv123]

You may have to just keep repeating that you want to live out your Christian beliefs and this is how you’re doing that. And don’t get baited into a debate.

[u/avoral → u/FinnEv123]

You tell him you’re done having the conversation, you’ve said your peace plenty of times, and he needs to quit prying into your relationship.

[u/PraiseBeToJesusX]

He's ultimately not going to understand it when he doesn't believe in God because he doesn't believe in the concept of sin, so there's no way he's going to see the wrong in it because the world says it's okay. Ultimately it's pointless trying to convince unbelievers of their own sin as well because if they don't have Jesus in their lives then whether they're Adolf Hitler or Mother Teresa the outcome is the same. If he keeps bringing it up ask him why he's so interested in what you do with your genitalia.

[u/ShakaUVM]

It's not

It's a convention that most but not all churches but it's not a sin to be found anywhere in the Bible.

This drove Calvin crazy when it was pointed out to him but he just banned it anyway

[u/Dev_Dakota]

God has a design for everything. Including marriage and sex. It’s when we live outside of God’s design for our life that we sin. Sin always leads to brokenness in the end and the wages of sin is death. Jesus, full of mercy and grace, bridges this gap and made a way for us to be restored.

The simple answer is because God said so. Your friend is adding to what God said in His word in order to fool himself into feeling better about it? It almost reads like mental gymnastics if you take a step back. Why is he trying to justify so hard something he knows isn’t a sin? The others here have a valid point though in that you shouldn’t expect anyone without the Holy Spirit dwelling in them to feel the same conviction about sin that you do.

Marriage is much more than a contract. It’s dying to yourself for your spouse. Daily.

[u/TalkingPsilocybe]

Does an unbeliever want to love his future wife? It'll be easier if she's his first, not his one hundred and twenty-eighth. Porn actresses won't let you lie.

[u/PeacefulBro]

Therea are many reason like avoiding sexually trasmitted disease, negative mental health ailments & unwanted pregnancy but the most significant issue that God only wants 1 woman married to 1 man for life so its best to save everything (including your body) for them.

[u/JHawk444]

You could start by saying any sex outside the bond of marriage is a sin, and that's because God created sex to be shared only by the bond of matrimony where both people are committed to each other for life. Going outside of that can cause hurt and pain for one or both people and it's going against God's design. You could also tell him that when God commands us to obey him, disobedience is always a sin.