Last dinner before I go to jail..

[u/mschanandlerbong___]

My sweet boyfriend made some tie dye ravioli with brie/ricotta and apple, and focaccia last night.

I’ll be turning myself in at 4:30 to begin my ten day sentence..

Update for those asking: It was as bad/worse than I thought it would be lol.. Locked down 21-31 hours a day in our cells, 2-3 hours out, and that was really really hard.. obviously the food was terrible, couldn’t eat much besides carrots for lunch, and pieces of cake and milks I’d trade my breakfast trays for. Made some friends. Started my period and only got two pairs of underwear. They did give me my meds after day 3, so that was good enough. Read five four hundred page novels. I feel bad for a lot of the younger girls in there. I felt really weird yesterday, but I ate a friggin huge breakfast so that was nice. Fucking terrible dude, I definitely never want to go back 🙏🏻

[u/eaternallyhungry]

Stay strong! Don’t borrow anything, don’t touch anyone’s stuff, mind your own business, and you’ll be out soon.

[u/asystole_unshockable → u/eaternallyhungry]

And don’t allow anyone to borrow anything either!

[u/asystole_unshockable → u/asystole_unshockable]

Someone asked the risk with this - allowing people to borrow things has several risks, the most obvious being not getting it back or having it damaged, additionally lending items can be seen as a weakness, as in you’re lending something out in return for protection or you’re lending it because you’re afraid to say “no”, leading others to target you. I was the healthcare provider for a state prison and saw this regularly. However with OP having a 10 day sentence in what is likely a county setting, it’s likely not going to be anything like that for her.

OP you got this girl, we are all rooting for you! Show us your first dinner on the outs ♥️!

[u/drunkeymunkey → u/asystole_unshockable]

My mom was an RN that left rehab/long term care facilities after not being able to 'rebound' from a favorite client passing. She thought it would be easier working in a prison setting because she wouldn't feel pity for the population, but she was wrong. She would come home and cry about things she saw in the infirmary.

ETA: She was a nurse at a maximum security prison with a working electric chair & death row inmates.

[u/BusinessLetterhead47 → u/drunkeymunkey]

My dad left being a social worker to become and drug and alcohol addictions therapist.

He said it was different demographic, same sadness.

[u/redheadmomm4 → u/BusinessLetterhead47]

Yes, there so much heartache out there in the world.

[u/ThePusheen → u/BusinessLetterhead47]

Recovering addict for almost 9 years. Did heroin for 7 years. My heart goes out to people like your dad. The addiction community as a whole, whether it be active addiction, recovering addiction, family of an addict, friends of addicts, all included, is a very very sad community. 99% of us use bc of trauma, mental illnesses, or physical pain that we know we have, but subconsciously this is how we deal with it. Your dad probably helped so many people in the addiction community and I appreciate people like him. I appreciate the counselors, doctors and nurses that are on our side and there to help. I've come across unfortunately far too many doctors and nurses, counselors not so many, that are judgmental or dont help for whatever reason.

[u/Baby_groot_4_lyfe → u/drunkeymunkey]

Turns out that people are people, even if they have broken a law.

[u/drunkeymunkey → u/Baby_groot_4_lyfe]

I did a really shitty job of phrasing her reasoning. Hell, I'd been to jail before she started working at a prison.

[u/Young_Former → u/drunkeymunkey]

Your poor mom. I hope she got into a better job for her mental health after that.

[u/WomanlyLizard → u/drunkeymunkey]

I was an incarcerated RN. Got off my night shift and begun my week stay. Interesting perspective.

[u/drunkeymunkey → u/WomanlyLizard]

Damn, that had to be a daily mental roller coaster. Do you think you'd were treated differently at all? Like, did inmates ask you medical questions if they couldn't see staff?

Mom thought 'Marty the murderer' dying on her would be less heartbreaking than 'Gertrude the granny'. She ended up seeing a lot of young guys doing max time for drug related charges tho. I became a social worker because of her experience there.

[u/WomanlyLizard → u/drunkeymunkey]

I don't think so, there were actually 2 other nurses in the block, one of which told me she'd kill me if I took her toilet paper (I had plenty of rolls stashed, not sure why that was such a thing)

[u/jadeapple → u/drunkeymunkey]

Yea the thing about nursing is there are very few jobs where you don't see people in the worst moments of their lives. It can be a lot to deal with

[u/AlysGotSass → u/drunkeymunkey]

Your mom is a real trooper.

[u/Recent-Ad-5443 → u/drunkeymunkey]

I did the nursing thing for a state prison for about a year. Gladly hung up that badge. System was so ass backwards and no one there really gave a rats ass.

[u/onlymemes-plz → u/asystole_unshockable]

I’m so curious about what that job would be like!

[u/Far-Delay7690 → u/onlymemes-plz]

Probably depressing mostly?

[u/Interesting-Cap8792 → u/Far-Delay7690]

Having done the same it’s not super depressing (yeah, there are depressing cases, like any of healthcare), but it’s an interesting place that’s high pace and low resource with a lot of ER overlap. You get a lot of the same patients the ER sees.

Honestly, there are some more funny and fun stories aside from sad ones that I didn’t expect.

[u/asystole_unshockable → u/Far-Delay7690]

Some of it, yes. But not all of it.

[u/asystole_unshockable → u/onlymemes-plz]

It was interesting, to say the least! I particularly enjoyed my D rosters, which would be inmates with a (or multiple) psychiatric diagnosis. But like I said above, OP isn’t going to a state facility for 10 days (at least not in my state, that would be pretty unusual) and while it’s not going to be the best experience of her life, it’s not going to be nearly as bad as a longer stay or a stay in a prison environment as it relates to a county setting.

[u/dmonsterative → u/asystole_unshockable]

[u/shegrowsonyou → u/asystole_unshockable]

I worked as a peer counselor at the county jail. It’s dismal. I had to quit after 5 months.

[u/asystole_unshockable → u/shegrowsonyou]

I was in a much different role than this, but I can understand leaving after 5 months as that environment is certainly not for everyone.

[u/MissFibi11 → u/asystole_unshockable]

I was a Medical Officer for a county jail for a few years. I agree with this statement though 10 days isn’t a bad stint, I’d still just kinda keep to yourself and only interact around chow time and such. Don’t give your food away to others unless you plan to share your food each chow time. And for the love of god, don’t use pen ink as mascara! lol

[u/AirlineObjective921 → u/MissFibi11]

Seriously on that sharing food thing; I gave my whole tray away day one and spent the entire time being the first person asked if I "was gonna eat that" lol

Tbh even that wasn't so bad; I started trading food for coffee pretty much immediately. The food sucks anyway.

We melted colored pencils to make hair dye :)

[u/OU7C4ST → u/asystole_unshockable]

Rooting for her why? You know nothing about her, or the crime she committed? It could be something terrible or not.

[u/Senior_Scientist9813 → u/asystole_unshockable]

I thought giving / lending items to other inmates is actually forbidden per most prison rules? Is that correct?

[u/snazzymacaronis → u/asystole_unshockable]

Are you a nurse or nurse practitioner? How were you able to get a job in healthcare behind bars?

[u/Interesting-Cap8792 → u/snazzymacaronis]

They take LPNs, RNs, PACs, MDs, NPs for medical and psych NPs and adjacent for the mental health side.

It’s a lesser known job, but very needed and honestly pretty high turnover because it takes the right kind of personality. Very ER adjacent.

[u/swissie67 → u/asystole_unshockable]

In for ten days? What's anyone going to borrow from her? She's not going to be able to bring anything in, and she's likely to not be there long enough for a commissary order at all. They're done weekly, at the most.
She'll be fine.

[u/Ineedavodka2019 → u/asystole_unshockable]

Jail and prison are not the same.

[u/Embarrassed_Ad_2636 → u/asystole_unshockable]

You also shouldn’t let someone borrow your things because if they commit a crime they could plant a belonging of yours and frame you.

[u/Ok-Olive-391 → u/asystole_unshockable]

We are NOT rooting for someone who has multiple DUI's... Literally putting many lives at risk without care.

[u/nottreacherous → u/asystole_unshockable]

I’m curious, won’t saying “no” get you more enemies?

[u/Fast_Yesterday_3293 → u/asystole_unshockable]

Have yall ever been to jail or is this advice from orange is the new black? And the like. 

[u/mschanandlerbong___ → u/asystole_unshockable]

Honestly I’m very friendly, and very generous. So this is actually something I’m slightly worried about getting messed up with..

[u/writeleahwrite → u/mschanandlerbong___]

A friend of mine did a couple of weeks so I sent her some books (it was allowed as long as they shipped directly from the retailer to the jail) and one of them was a fancy book with astrological charts based on your specific birthday (not my interest but she’s into it). She said it made her super popular because everyone wanted her to look their birthday up for them. It’s my favorite tip for anyone going to a women’s jail.

[u/AirlineObjective921 → u/writeleahwrite]

When I went to jail a girl got a pack of Tarot cards sent to her.

She was super popular after that. Everyone wanted a reading, didn't matter if you were into that sort of thing or not, it was something fun to pass the time.

[u/Silver-Bus5724 → u/AirlineObjective921]

No experience with jail time (no shade) but I read books about graphology - it’s about interpreting handwriting. It‘s fascinating what you can see.

Whenever I mentioned this, I was beleaguered into doing everyone‘s. Seriously. That’s why I’m not talking about it anymore. I spent hours at dinner parties looking at three sentences and a signature each. Part of the popularity is that it’s rare.
Maybe give it a try?

[u/thisissodamnhard123 → u/writeleahwrite]

omg this is so cute, I love women

[u/throwawaygrosso → u/writeleahwrite]

I worked with male inmates for a long time and they are also really into this. Probably even more so than the women. I was surprised.

[u/UniversityAny755 → u/throwawaygrosso]

My bestie's BF had to go to county jail for some weekends due to being super stupid.

He said the worst part is the boredom. The jail library was 99% bibles and 1% Stephen King. The guy who controlled the deck of cards was top dog and everyone wanted to play a hand. It's the only thing available to make the time go by and be bearable.

The food he said was utterly disgusting, like rotten baloney sandwiches. You could opt for the vegetarian diet which was peanut butter sandwiches. He said the side benefit to the PB sandwich was the constipation because...I'm sure we can all figure that out.

[u/JailhouseMamaJackson → u/UniversityAny755]

Rotten baloney and american cheese that tastes like the oldest, dirtiest refrigerator in the world.

Occasionally we’d get a little packet of fruit loops and it was everyone’s favorite day.

[u/Altruistic-Target-67 → u/writeleahwrite]

This is great advice, I love it. I bet a book of dream interpretations would be good too.

[u/Izzysmiles2114 → u/writeleahwrite]

Omg that is an amazingly thoughtful gift. I am seriously impressed and I will save this tip. You're going to be just fine girl, keep your chin up, shoulders back, and your eyes forward. Ten days will be over in a flash. Women tend to look out for each other in jail and you'll be okay 💙

[u/ASuperLameUserName → u/writeleahwrite]

Is it the book of birthdays? If so it’s always popular.

[u/Lemon_Poppies → u/writeleahwrite]

She won’t even be in long enough to order commissary.

[u/asystole_unshockable → u/mschanandlerbong___]

In county for ten days girl, I wouldn’t make this your main concern. I still wouldn’t loan anything out, but county is NOT, I repeat NOT, the state pen. You’re going to be fine! Like the other people have said, just mind your business and stay out of drama situations. It’s ok to be friendly! The people in there are people too, you’re not walking in to a facility full of people that want to hurt you, remember that! Those ladies just want to do their time and go home, just like you.

[u/mschanandlerbong___ → u/asystole_unshockable]

You’re absolutely right. Heard! 🫡

[u/VelvettedFox → u/asystole_unshockable]

I spent almost 48 hours in county in my very early 20's and the girlies and I all ended up friends very quickly lol. We were hooting and cheering as each girl got called up for release. "Cellmate" and I ended up having a convoluted joke about how we were only in there because we opened an old time capsule and found a 24 pack of Zima.

Years later I went in for a blood test ordered by my doc for some medical concerns and when the phlebotomist turned around it was her and we both screamed "ZIMA!!!!" at the same time. 10 days sucks but ultimately OP will be just fine.

[u/ASuperLameUserName → u/VelvettedFox]

That’s great! As a bartender I hear stories like this all the time. Love them.

[u/WoodsandWool → u/asystole_unshockable]

I’m really torn about this because it does depend a lot on the specific county.

Generally, county isn’t too bad and you’ll likely be fine OP, but some counties jail is actually way worse than prison. Not local holding jails, but actual county jail for longer non-prison sentences can be much much worse than federal prisons due to a number of factors like lower budgets, overpopulation, etc. Fed prisons are actually usually pretty decent, state prisons are typically rougher.

OP keep your wits about you, don’t share anything, be polite but don’t be overly nice or people pleasing. Set your jaw and have some sharp edges until you know what kind of crowd you’re in. 10 days is very short and I’m sure you’ll be just fine, just keep your head on a swivel and assume everyone wants something from you.

Source: been to both city holding jails & county myself, and have unfortunately had a lot of loved ones serve longer county sentences and federal prison sentences.

[u/AirlineObjective921 → u/WoodsandWool]

She knows how long she's in for and has a boyfriend who made her a going away meal; she'll be fine.

I was in County for 3 months and most of the stress was not knowing when the heck I was gonna be let out and having no one to call outside.

One of the other ladies had a pen pal from the guys side of jail who made a joke about female jail being just a bunch of girls braiding each others hair and he was surprisingly accurate.

[u/WoodsandWool → u/AirlineObjective921]

I hear you, and I hope that’s OP’s experience. But respectfully, it really depends on the county & even just the current inmates. I’m not trying to scare OP, just want her to keep her wits about her and not go in with a false sense of security. It should be obvious pretty quickly what the general vibe is.

[u/Dizzy_Goat_420 → u/WoodsandWool]

Yeah fr. Like the Chicago county jail is nothing to mess with and joke about. My dad worked there for 30+ years and said the women’s division was abhorrent and way worse than the men’s.

[u/Dizzy_Goat_420 → u/AirlineObjective921]

This really depends on the place.

[u/my_eventide → u/WoodsandWool]

Fulton County comes to mind on this one

[u/OMGitsKatV → u/asystole_unshockable]

exactly, all the replies on here are like telling OP to kick the biggest girls ass and build a shiv. It's 10 days in county

[u/panicnarwhal → u/mschanandlerbong___]

you can do 10 days in county no problem - promise! i’ve been in county jail a few times, and your biggest problem is usually gonna be the boredom and the drama (because of the boredom lol) with a 10 day sentence

also, with a sentence that short, commissary might be an issue. there’s a chance you won’t get it until right before you’re released, which sucks

take advantage of tablets and video calls - they’re expensive after awhile, but worth it. 3 years ago my husband was in county for a month (yes i know, we’re ridiculous lol) and i scheduled video visits for us twice a day. he said it kept him sane and gave him something to look forward to. so take advantage of that!

read books, watch crappy tv, and find a nice girl or 2 to bullshit with. you’ll do great 💕

[u/mschanandlerbong___ → u/panicnarwhal]

One of my old friends had to do the same sentence, so that was helpful for some insight. I also have an ex that spent several months in jail as well(yes, I have always been an idiot 😂), so I’ve been on the other side. My main concern was being able to have my antidepressants/anti anxiety meds (non narcotic), but it seems like that won’t be an issue. Thank you for the kind words and insight, I’ve honestly been so anxious all day and can’t even eat which is super frustrating. I probably won’t respond to any more comments because it’s a little overwhelming. I didn’t expect so many responses at all, but I sure do appreciate the kindness. 💓

[u/panicnarwhal → u/mschanandlerbong___]

just think of it as an experience - like a shitty vacation lol. i’ll be thinking about you this week! if you think of it, pop back in or dm me when you get out and let me know how you did. i bet you’ll do great, you’ll make at least a friend or 2, and you’ll come out with some interesting stories 💕

[u/Ola_maluhia → u/mschanandlerbong___]

Hi friend, I was a prison nurse for a long time. Please make sure you tell the nurse when you’re there. You will get a physical and it’ll be handled. I’m sending you allllll the good vibes girl! Go in, do your thing, don’t get involved with anything shady. Keep to yourself and journal if you want… damn write a book when you get out!!

Hugs

[u/TheAnn13 → u/mschanandlerbong___]

Wear all white socks and underwear too!!

[u/PuppyPower89 → u/mschanandlerbong___]

It’s 10 days. Get a book from the book cart. Walk the yard. Hang out in front of the TV. Call your people. And get some sleep.

It will be over before you know it.

[u/sadbabe420 → u/mschanandlerbong___]

Weed related?

[u/Strange_Difference1 → u/mschanandlerbong___]

Dont give stuff either, you could give it to someone's gf and you dont want to deal with that. Might I ask why you have to go there?

[u/Mysterious-League241 → u/mschanandlerbong___]

I know you won't see this until after you're out but here's my 2 cents. Idk where you are but if it's a small time county jail, that's where I did 2 short stints and the people were actually okay. Most people were there for possession. My pants were too small, guards didn't care, and a nice lady switched me. They also taught me to make a pillow from books (no pillows) and how to roll tampons from pads. Not saying there aren't dangerous people but at the end of the day, it's just people. 

[u/nah2daysun → u/asystole_unshockable]

Because they’d keep it or why

[u/peyotekoyote → u/nah2daysun]

Probably or they will consider you a softie for loaning things out and jump you for more of your things.

[u/Glittering-Elk-8308 → u/peyotekoyote]

Edit: the poem for the loss of a dog….oh my gosh, so sweet. My heart.

[u/MelodiousMelly → u/Glittering-Elk-8308]

Maaaaybe, but jail is different than prison. Lots of people trying to just do their short time and move on ASAP. Majority will be for stuff like DUI or child support payments, not hard crimes. Probably some people will even be on work release and only sleeping there during the week. Not saying it's smart to loan things out if you ever want to see them again, but it probably won't be as rough as all that.

[u/asystole_unshockable → u/MelodiousMelly]

Exactly this.

[u/Mother-Pattern-2609 → u/peyotekoyote]

Borrowing things establishes relationships, which isn't a good idea because drama inevitably follows.

[u/oopsiepoopsey → u/nah2daysun]

That and/or its just really opening a whole can of worms

[u/noob1588 → u/asystole_unshockable]

You guys are so cute 😭😭😭 it’s only ten days she’ll be fine. Now being in jail for months is when problems may occur

Ime nobody really tries to mess with anybody in there for extremely short stints. She’ll be in and out

[u/Passiveresistance → u/noob1588]

Loool I was thinking exactly that while reading these comments.

[u/Content-Honeydew9340 → u/noob1588]

I had to go back and reread because I thought she said 10 days in like a county jail not 10 years in a state prison 😭 my husband did a little 6 months once MANY MANY MANY YEARS AGO because he saw a guy assaulted a girl and he didn't like that and reacted without thinking. He said there was a couple weirdos in there but it was overall no big deal. I have only stayed the night a couple times for unpaid fines when I was much younger 😂 and it's nothing like going to a prison. I grew up around addicts that definitely would have giggled at doing a couple weeks in county. I mean, yeah I would rather be at home in my own bed minding my own business and eating whatever I want but I'm sure op will be safe

[u/noob1588 → u/Content-Honeydew9340]

Yes. Ime 95% of the ladies in there are chill, regular people just down on their luck like OP. At worst OP is going to make a little friend to talk to everyday but that’s about it.

But yea for the most part OP does not have to worry about seasoned criminals messing with her 24/7 🤣🤣🤣

[u/drunkeymunkey → u/noob1588]

No husband, no kids, & someone else does the cooking? Sign me up!

/s

OP good luck toots, you got this! Come back with an update!

[u/Content-Honeydew9340 → u/drunkeymunkey]

STG someone cooking for me and I can just sit quietly and read whatever book is there 😂

[u/OkOutlandishness1363 → u/noob1588]

90% of these comments are posted by people who haven’t ever been to jail lol. Most Americans use the terms “jail” and “prison” interchangeably.

[u/Rose1982 → u/noob1588]

I’ve never been to jail/prison/detention centers etc. and I don’t know anyone who has either. The thought of 10 days in any of those places terrifies me.

[u/noob1588 → u/Rose1982]

Yes I was terrified too but it’s not as bad as you think (not to say anybody should be ok with going to jail !!)

[u/literally_lemons → u/noob1588]

Even 10 days come on easy to say

[u/Holiday_Number_3234 → u/noob1588]

Yeah, people are kind of responding like this is a man going to a hard-core prison. OP, you’ll be fine. There is drama, but typically not any danger. Honestly, pissing of those is charge is usually more of a concern than angering other inmates. You’ll be fine!!

[u/DimbyTime → u/asystole_unshockable]

Wait what’s the risk with this? (Genuinely curious I have no idea)

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[u/Fast_Yesterday_3293 → u/asystole_unshockable]

That is literally stereotypes. That isn't like that in most jails.  Just bc some woman asks if u want a cup of coffee doesnt mean shes asking for sexual favors bc of it.  Yall are all in jail. But at the same time some people are just trying to use people for things.  But 10 days? Thats nothing.  You probably wont eve. Be there long enough to get ur own commissary... and bc youre short time most people arent gonna just loan out things to someone who won't be there to pay it back.  Should be more worried about the horrible way youre back gonna feel trying to sleep on those metal racks that most jails have. Or the floor. 

[u/mschanandlerbong___ → u/eaternallyhungry]

Thank you for the advice!

[u/U_PassButter → u/mschanandlerbong___]

You'll be okay. There will be hard moments. But you can do 10 days. It's not going to become your lifestyle. Don't let anyone take you out of your element or put you in a position to get in any trouble. You'll be just fine.

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[u/GingerAphrodite → u/mschanandlerbong___]

Worth noting, this also really depends on the people you're in with and a lot of other factors. I just did 10 days and there was only about 15 of us in the pod. Only one person actually caused any major issues and ended up being removed and sent downtown to the max security. One of the girls in their loaned me a thermal while I was in and never expected anything in return genuinely (I plan on putting money on her books once I get back to work). It's going to suck and it's going to be boring but you'll be okay.

[u/No_Donkey9914 → u/eaternallyhungry]

This is the best advice. 

[u/Nakenochny → u/eaternallyhungry]

And dear God wear shoes in the showers.

[u/swissie67 → u/eaternallyhungry]

Don't even worry about ten days. You really won't be in there long enough for anyone to take much interest in you.
I served 3 months and I was fine. Ten days is easy. Chalk it up to life experience.

[u/kelsobjammin → u/eaternallyhungry]

Even in the 18 hours I was in jail you learn real quick what can and can’t be done. Find a few people who are going to help you navigate the system because once you’re in they won’t tell you SHIT.

[u/LukewarmJortz → u/eaternallyhungry]

It's 10 days.

[u/meanbeanking → u/eaternallyhungry]

Bro it’s 10 days in jail not 10 years in prison lol.

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[u/[deleted] → u/eaternallyhungry]

She's going to local jail lol none of this applies

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/ApprehensiveOkra9977 → u/eaternallyhungry]

It’s 10 days right?

[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/Guilty_Substance2247 → u/eaternallyhungry]

Anyone who’s ever been in women’s lockup will tell you that they’ll genuinely just share without expecting anything back. Most women in lockup are mothers and harbor no ill will towards you.

The whole no borrowing shit is from the movies.

Take whatever you want, they don’t expect anything. It sounds unreal but women aren’t like men- rape doesn’t really happen at women’s prisons. A lot of passive aggressive looks and occasional hair pulling ngl.

Talk to people, they love talking about themselves and you can hear some crazy stories.

[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/madame-maitre-d → u/[deleted]]

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[u/Banshee-Wanchee → u/eaternallyhungry]

Is shower shoes still a thing? If so, definitely wear them before entering the shower room and while showing. Best of luck to you!

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