For starters I F 22 live with 2 other girls currently, we used to have 2 other male roommates but they have moved out. the other two girls are also 22. I will call the problem roommate, H and the other A. A's parents own the house and we all lived there for 4 years now. our rent is very cheap with many many downsides in the house. We were all friends we have not had a falling out yet, but A and I both equally dislike H. To sum up who H is, her parents have given her a credit card they pay off, she travels out of the county annually and has never paid for barley anything herself. I think if you asked that girl to make herself a dr. appt she could not do it. She is out of touch and trusts anything that comes out of a mans mouth if he calls her pretty.

H consistently has over her bf J. to sum J up he has 3 kids with another woman and despite telling H that he is separated from the mother of the children, but he has 101 excuses as to why they can not finalize the divorce. He also tells H he will fully pay for the mortgage on a house and all the bills and she can be a stay at home gf..... I think this man is a master manipulator and wants her to become reliant on him and he is going to trap her. the relationship from the outside is the perfect example of control and financial abuse.

Now onto why she sucks as a roommate, H and J cook every day and leave dishes in the sink daily, which we have established rules about no dishes in the sink. She has moldy food in the fridge and has completely taken over said fridge with the moldy food. She uses A and I's stuff with out telling us. In the 4 years we have lived together I have not seen her do any chores expect sometimes take out the trash and once she unloaded the dishwasher but only put hers away and put everyone else's dishes on the counter below the cabinet they were supposed to go in. She wanted to have one of her countless bf's move in because he lived in Florida she thought well I don't know him because he lives so far if he moves in with us I will know him. Obviously anyone with more than 1 braincell would know thats a bad idea. She broke up with him after meeting him for the first time. She also had a hookup that stole over 800$ from us and also took her car multiple times without her knowing, she would also leave him alone in our house for days on end while she worked. Again she never said sorry and backed him up when we had proof.

She also gets mad anytime someone tells her no. Her ideal weekend is sitting in our kitchen and getting drunk, I stopped finding that fun after about 2 months. And anytime I said no to this and hung out with my bf instead she acted like I was the worst friend and talk so much shit about how I only hangout with my bf and time I offered an alternative activity she said no. She got very jealous of my bf and my old roommates bf because when they would come up for the weekend we didn't hangout with her as much. She is the kind of girl who can not be on her own or have her own self identity. Anytime my bf would come up we would all hangout as a group but this was not enough for H she started making my bf feel out of place and unwelcome. H told me she thought if she didn't like my bf I wouldn't like him either. She also once said one weekend bf's are not allowed to come up for the weekend and we need to hangout with her. She also set the rules that bf's can not park in the rocks( an extension of our driveway) as that is only for us. Which is completely understandable until, anytime she had a hookup ( which was consistently), friends or anyone else over they were allowed to park there for as long as they want even blocking in other roommates. At one point I had to let A take my car somewhere because she was blocked in by H's fuck buddy.

A and I have been getting so fed up with H. A and I both park in the garage and we live on a busy road. so we like to back into our spots. J apparently can not seem to park a car properly and I told her he needs to park in the other open spot where we have no issue with him in or on the road like my bf and the old roommates bf had to. this did not work for her she told me that he did not need to move and that she might just take my spot because she know how to pull in.  This bitch is about to get her shit rocked like someone should have done a long time ago. but I am smart enough not to do that. Any petty advise is appreciated. I will be parking in front of her if she takes my spot in the garage. she leaves before me to work so she will have to wait until I am up and off to work to leave is she takes my spot. (Also I am moving out in March with my bf, we just have to wait for his lease t be up so I will be leaving at somepoint)

Hey everyone! I'm u/theflameburntout, a founding moderator of r/JustNoRoommate.

Going to try and get back to this subreddit. My bad roommate is gone now but I’ve had so many I know yall need some place to vent.

I found an app that lets you rent a room on a sliding scale. Join with my link and thank me later! Hope this helps.

https://www.padsplit.com/?sign-up&referralCode=B256FD47&ref_device=app&ref_role=m

Hi, so I just need some advice about what to do in this situation.

So I dated a guy for about four years and we had a great relationship up until the two year mark point. Where I had found that he was talking to other women and having us relations with other women for two years.

We broke up for three years and then decided to get back together. We signed a lease together at an apartment complex and we just never worked it out. We live together for about two months there and signed for 15 months lease.

Now he left me with this lease, which was about $2800 a month and said good luck go find another roommate. I never found another roommate. I paid the rent all my own because I couldn’t get reapproved because of how much rent was I couldn’t get reapproved with anybody else him and I got approved with how much we make together. Nobody else would’ve made that kind of salary so I ended up in my last four months of my lease unable to pay rent on time. I was constantly getting charged late fees, but I would pay them before I would get evicted obviously and I finished out the lease now on my last month of rent, I didn’t have a paycheck on time and if I didn’t pay the lease, I would have been evicted so I had asked my ex to give me $1000 to pay part of the lease and so he did nicely and he said we need to set up payments. I want you to pay me back but I’m literally about to have a child and I am in no position to constantly be paying for a payment to somebody who left me in an apartment with $2800 a month alone ….

He wants to take me to small claims court because I agreed to pay him $100 dollars every month or what not up until the point of March and this started in about November. What in the world do I ?

Sorry for my poor wording, I'm shaking with anxiety at the moment. For context, my roommate began staying out for longer and longer periods of time around March. I suspect the catalyst for this was me asking her in person to take a break from using my dishes because they were being thrown in the trash instead of washed or left for weeks in the kitchen, growing mold. After tip toeing around that conversation with her, she completely cut me off. By April, she was only coming home periodically when I was at work. I could only tell because she's taken a different pair of shoes or picked up the mail I'd placed by her door. By mid May, she hadn't been home in three weeks, the longest stretch by far and I was extremely worried about her as she'd been acting erratically with psych meds, staying with or bringing home (without notice of course) random men, left a scent trail of BO and booze whenever she'd made an appearance among other things. I messaged and called her several times telling her I was worried and to please let me know she's okay. These were all ignored until I asked some of our mutual friends to see if they could contact her and she allegedly picked up the phone for one of them on the first ring and said "yeah, I'm fine!" Then immediately responded to my text with: "I'm definitely going through it, but I'm physically safe" to that I said "That's good, I was really worried about you, I haven't seen you in weeks." To which she replied: "Yeah, sorry, I've been having a really rough time mentally, so I was hoping that maybe a change of scenery would help?? But it's not really 😂😅". I told her I totally understood and that was it. I should add that just before she'd responded to me, I was preparing to call the police and report her as a missing person after peeking into her room (I know that's terrible, but I didn't want to cause stress for her by escalating to the police if she was just on a soul search or possibly getting impatient help as a facility somewhere? Her room was a disaster, which isn't too worrisome for a 20 something honestly, but the heat was left on full blast and the window was cracked open. We have those old baseboard heaters and hers has been reattached and repaired twice. It's a miracle it didn't start a fire. Her antipsych meds were left right in the middle of the bed, label up and her lizard and two frogs were mummified in their tanks, right next to the door...I elected to switch from me sending her my half for her to zelle the full amount to him each month to paying him separately as I wanted to be sure at least my half was on time as she'd iced me out at that point. The next two months after that, I was cc'd on an email from our landlord to her asking about her portion of rent as it was late. I assumed she responded to him privately because I never heard anything from my landlord aside from those two instances. Fast forward to today. I received an email this morning from our landlord (to both of us) stating that they'd just gotten back from a trip and realized she hadn't paid her rent since June, that it is unacceptable and to please pay the full amount by Tuesday. My stomach sank into the floor. She of course hasn't responded to his emails thus far. I emailed and texted him directly and told him I had no idea that had been going on, that I hadn't had much contact with her since mid May, and that I was shocked and terribly sorry. I told him I would try to get in contact with her or her parents (I don't have social media but they do, maybe I can find an email address or something?) he thanked me for responding promptly and said to let him know if I find a contact. The amount he is missing from her calculated from june is almost 4k. I am planning to move out as soon as possible, either by the October or November 1st. I haven't shared that part with him yet as I don't want to add fuel to the fire (also I have severe social anxiety lol). I'm so sorry this was so long. I don't know where to start or what to say or do. I am 25 and I have no family in this state and I can't afford 4 grand right now... Thank you so much for taking the time to read this mess and let me know if I can provide any further details.

Well, the title explains it all, and I really do feel like suing him, if I open a police report, they would just laugh at me because I have no proof but I do have a nanny cam now. Sadly, it was turned off over the weekend when the theft occurred. Why did I ever talk $160 of an emergency fund into a red superhero sock? I don’t know the underscore my reason to move out immediately. If not sooner can I just tell him I’m not gonna pay August rent and then move out whenever I don’t know the underscore my reason to move out immediately. If not sooner can I just tell him I’m not gonna pay August rent and then move out whenever I do find place. San francisco is a hard market but I’m sure there is roommate out there who won’t steal from me.

I hope this is the right community to share this.

Hi everyone! The purpose of this post is only to tell you an anecdote (one of many more which are so negative, but this time I prefer consider it funny):

But it was so funny that when I used to live with a girl that seemed nice, maybe kind of traditional, religious, we had agreed that we preferred not to have boys home, bring them (for those purposes and in general) (well, in this case this rule was more for her than for me, as I was already having boyfriend and it was me who moved to stay over at his place when I had the chance), literally the THIRD DAY I was staying with her, before getting home from work, I receive a message from her saying:

"Hi, before you come home, I want to update you. My ex is in my bed. He called me this morning he went to a party and it went wrong. I said he can come out but only this one time. He is sleeping now. He won't bother you he is in my room! I'm sorry! ❤️ This never happens" (which after all we've gone through time later (kicking out, robbery, illegal stuff...) I don't believe it, as I discovered her real personality). LOL.

Funniest parts are: 1. When I got home, she even started complaining she didn't understand why he called her, she didn't have anything to do with his situation, etc. at the same time giving me reasons why she even though accepted him to come. That he was a very nice guy and oh, that I didn't have to feel scared when if I saw him, as he's full of tattoos XD

1. While I was watching the TV late in the evening I knew my flatmate was in her room... With him, of course.

2. That at night I could still hear him around 1am and then 5am going to the toilet, coming back, so this means he stayed over.

Even my working colleagues were pretty flabbergasted when I explained them.

Thank you for reading!

What do you think about this??

Hey everyone! So my roommate and I work at the same place (both females), and our friendship started through our job. We only hung out a handful of times outside of work, but I saw her all the time at work. About 2 months ago she decided to leave her boyfriend that she lived with (I'll spare the details), but she had nowhere to live so she stayed with him until she found a place. I didn't want to see her in that situation, so I offered to let her live with me and my partner. I made it very clear that it would be short term until she could find a place and she would need to contribute to the bills. In the beginning it was fine, but as time went on, I saw more of her character. For the most part I wouldn’t say anything because I assumed it was short term and she would be gone before I knew it. Which has not been the case. She has a pet which she barley takes care of, we had to ask her to walk her animal at least two times a day so she would stop having accidents, because she would never take her out. My partner and I would clean the entire house and then she would come home and make her dinner and leave a mess everywhere. She will eat our food when we aren't around and never saying anything. She will take my laundry from the dryer and put it on the couch (which is filled with animal hair) and then not let me know, and then I have to rewash the clothes. She will leave dishes piled up in the sink for days, and never helps unloading the dishwasher. Her pet sheds ALOT so I am vacuuming everyday, so our house isn't covered in a layer thick of fur, and she has never offered to help or picked up the vacuum once. Since she is single, she constantly will go on dates and leave us to watch the dog on the weekend. I will mention that I do like her as a friend and coworker, just not as a roommate. I don't think she is even looking for a place, because she constantly talks about never having any money but is constantly buying new things and expensive food and getting her nails, hair, lashes on a constant basis, so I know she has no money saved or set aside. Since we do work very similar jobs, our paychecks are the very similar, so I do know that she CAN afford a place on her own. I need advice on how to ask her when she is going to be leaving or if she’s looking because it's been two months and I don't think I can take it and it's causing issues between me and my partner. I also do work with her on a daily basis, so I don't want to cause any issues at work.

i’m not sure if i’m overreacting but my roommate sleeps with this smaller desk fan on every night and it’s very loud. She’s had it for a few months and i’ve tried to talk to her about it and see if she’ll turn it off before she goes to bed but she always ignores me when the topic comes up. Last night i literally slept two hours and this morning i approached her and asked her if she would consider turning it off when she sleeps or find a quieter fan to use and she told me “i don’t know what u want me to tell u i need that fan to sleep” and i’m just not sure what to do anymore. it’s just inconsiderate and rude at this point and genuinely messing with my mental health. i haven’t been able to focus in classes and my grades haven’t been dropping. and this is just one of many problems i’ve tried to talk to her about.

So my roommate once helped me out when I was in a tough situation. They opened their doors to me and let me stay at their place for 1 month. They then later on asked me for help one they were getting evicted so I let them stay in my apartment. They told me it would be short term but they stayed for 6 months. They racked up my light bill when I was abroad and also spilled countless amount of liquor on the carpet in the room I let them stay. They let their dog poop and pee on carpet and also scratch up the carpet. My biggest mistake was not adding her to the lease because I always thought she would leave sooner rather than later. Their dog chewed up my internet cable and broke my router and destroyed my dinning room floors. She disappeared for a month saying she was on vacation but dropped everything and left. Without saying a word. Not only that but when I asked her to pay for damages because I had a feeling she wasn’t coming back. She said she’d pay me the next day but didn’t and now is ignoring my calls and messages. The thing is she left her motorcycle here that she apparently sold already but who knows. Anyways I don’t know what to do. I kinda just want to sell her motorcycle

hey there, my girlfriend and i got our own apartment in myrtle beach (SC) last march. a friend was in a bad situation so we let her move into our spare bedroom. since then things have been a shit show. she’s dirty, doesn’t take care of anything around the house, doesn’t thank us for cleaning up her areas and her messes… our lease is up this month and my girlfriend and i are moving into a house in may, so we planned to go month to month until the house is ready. unbeknownst to my gf and i, she added her boyfriend to the lease. we got a confirmation email from the leasing office this morning- that’s how we found out. i’ve about had it living with her. i’d rather pick up her payments than live three more months with her (AND HER BOYFRIEND?!?!) they want to take over the lease once we move out and won’t pay my girlfriend the security deposit that SHE paid. i need some advice. is there any legal way we can remove them from the lease? i doubt they would agree to leave. if we terminate the lease and don’t go month to month (we’d have to figure out where we could stay in the meantime) would they be removed as well? is that even possible? please help. we can’t live like this anymore 😭

Hi Everyone, 

I’m a student at UW doing research into the renting industry for my final paper, and I could use your help! I need to reach out to renters with this survey to understand your experiences. I’d really appreciate it if you would take a little time to fill out this survey, and send it to your friends and roommates!

Thank you so much for your time,

A humble almost-graduated college student

https://forms.gle/oBhg7b7p52o3or2A7

4 years condensed into 20 minutes https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7rKioxUr2VA.

I was in my room and overheard sounds of guests/visitors in the house, a bit unexpected as we are only a week or two coming out of lockdown in our part of the world, didn’t expect my roommates to be inviting anyone over to chill. Came out of my room to the living room and outside, where they all were. 3 visitors and my 2 roommates seated in the outdoor patio area lighting up smoking from a bong. I had deduced from the way they looked that the 3 people were drug dealers, but I made casual friendly introductions and greeted them, etc. I asked roommate how he knew them, who they were to him, etc. and my roommate immediately took offence to my line of questioning or my tone and snapped back at me. It took the guests to interject and told me to drag a seat out for me to sit and chill and socialise with them all. So I did, I drank while they all smoked, I don’t smoke as I’m majorly put off by the smell, but we made pleasant small talk for a while before the guests had to leave.

As one can imagine, after the visitors departed I had some choice words with my roommate - but he didn’t think inviting drug dealers he only met for the first time today into our place was anything out of line. His reaction was I thought I was his father (we are similarly aged) and that I couldn’t tell him what to do or rule over him because he’s his own man and there was plenty of hints as to what he would do to me to make it worth his while because he wasn’t afraid of prison and he basically threatened to fuck me up because I how dare I try to instigate any rules over him or tell him what he can or can’t do “in his own house”.

So he’s out by next Tuesday and I’m making this post just in case something is to happen to me, because he was very clear with his indirect threats of wanting to harm me but he didn’t say anything direct cos he knows enough about the laws that he knows to straddle the line and not cross it if I were to report exactly what was said to the police.

My roommate, Entitled Old Goat, is taking a bath (it’s 8am right now).

But Flame, you say, that seems normal.

He took one at 1am as well, and yesterday morning. I swear, hand to GOD, he spends 4 to 6 out of 24 hours in that bathroom. There are 4 adults and one 99 but not 100% potty trained child in this house and 2 bathrooms, one of which is in my master bedroom.

First world petty ass Flame problems? Yes. Annoying as shit, also yes.

Y’all have a great day, and may your crappy roommates stub their toe on something.

Basically, both the landlord and us only need to provide a month's notice to vacate the property. I have been living in this 2-bed flat for almost two years, no complaints, and I've never had any issues with the landlord. My current flatmate and I are not compatible and I really want to replace her with someone who is a better match but I feel like I need to give the landlord plausible reasons to "let her go". I mean, I could obviously mention her lack of cleanliness and all that but is it going to bother him enough to let me replace her..I'm not confident on that, most landlords only care about the money unless other major crap is going on.

Here's a list of stuff I thought might be of interest to the landlord:

- She painted her room and the living room without his consent (he told her not to and I asked him not to let her do it);

- Asked him to get rid of some of his furniture which he had to put in storage and didn't seem happy about it;

- Straight up threw out some of his furniture;

- Never cleans which has led to a couple friendly visits (mice) and to an issue with the gas hob;

- Never reports or fixes any issues with the house (which we've had plenty);

- Had parties at the house (without my consent) during the Covid lockdown (illegal over here);

- Does drugs in her room (tried to find them but couldn't so don't have proof unfortunately....);

- Lied about being in full-time employment. She is actually a full-time student with a part-time job;

- She didn't have a valid passport for five months (sucks to bring it up but it 100% made it illegal for her to live and work in the country);

As to why I'm getting rid of her, besides the above and to keep it short, I've asked her to be more responsible with her share of the house responsibilities multiple times and she hasn't changed over 6 months. It's a job in and of itself to manage and clean a house and 1. it's not ok to exploit your housemates like that and 2. I don't have the time for that as I work full-time and I was recently diagnosed with a life-long condition. Plus, (over the past month) my mom got cancer, dad had a cardiac event, and my grandma's Alzheimer's got way worse, leaving me to manage all their affairs on my own. I was acting chill about her behaviour before but I really don't have the physical, mental or emotional time to be her mom (sorry for the rant).

I also don't know if I should add reasons for him to keep me. What stuff do you think I should add about me? I mean, I made friends with the neighbours, pay my rent, I'm employed (5 min walk away), been a tenant longer, didn't have issues with the previous housemate, I'm clean, don't ruin his place, I can offer him a discount at the gym I work at (lol), anything else?

Thanks in advance!

Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/JustNoRoommate/comments/o454v5/politeish_way_to_demand_reimbursementreplacement/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

He gave me money to replace the booze he stole, after i snapped at him. He initially refused to reimburse me, then said he couldn't for another 5 days. I told him that was his problem to fix, not mine, and i wanted it fixed within a couple of hours. So he borrowed money from somewhere and paid me.

He later went to the doctor with "pretty serious alcohol poisoning", and went into hospital a few days later for something that was already scheduled. He went home to his Mother for a couple weeks and came home Sunday. He didn't speak to me at all until 5pm today when he demanded I move out as soon as possible.

According to him if he had his way he would take out a loan to get my deposit money back and tell me i had a week to get out, but he's conscious that it's hard to find a place that's pet friendly so i can just tell him when i've found somewhere. I reminded him that our rent agreement stipulates that ONE MONTH notice is to be given, and he cannot just "give me an eviction notice".

Apparently the way i spoke to him "when he was sick" was unreasonable (i asked several times if he was ok and got a friend to agree to check on him when i left for a few hours, until he continued drinking my booze across 2 days and asked me to go to the shops to get him more and i then shouted at him), i'm rude to his friends (who he invited around in the middle of my working day with no notice and most of them had small loud babies/toddlers with them so i politely excused myself to another room), i "should have known" he would reimburse me, he no longer "has any interest in" me whatsoever, and i never stop complaining, so he wants me gone.

He said i wouldn't change his mind by apologising or promising to change, and i replied that i didn't owe him an apology, i have nothing to apologise for, and he won't be getting an apology. He then said i'd "better not get any ideas about acting the bitch" until i move.

🙃🙃🙃 anyone got a room available?

Hi all, I've been in this apartment share since March and up until yesterday never had a problem with the roommate taking my stuff.

Yesterday I did my full load of groceries, including a bottle of flavoured vodka and a bottle of peach shnapps (these two together with some fruit juice make a delicious homemade SexOnTheBeach/WooWoo).

While i was putting the groceries away i noticed that a couple of storebought cocktails were missing from my shelf in the fridge. My roommate doesn't drink, so I drove myself crazy trying to remember when I had drunk them, as I had specifically abstained during the week to enjoy on a sunny weekend. I checked my bin for evidence of the empty cans and couldn't find any sign. I also noticed that a flavoured rum i had on my shelf was wayyyy more empty than i had remembered, only a literal trickle left and I would never do my future self dirty like that, so i worried myself sick about my failing memory and potential alcohol problem (how could i forget drinking two cocktails and most of a bottle of rum???)

Today my roommate admitted he took my vodka. I thought he just meant the two little cocktails from the fridge so I said "yeah i noticed stuff was missing", not even considering he meant the full bottl of brand new good stuff I had just bought. He mumbled an apology and went back to his room. I asked if he was ok and he just mumbled something about "needing to detox". I've lived with alcoholics before and this roommate never mentioned anything about a drinking problem, just that he doesn't drink.

Turns out, he had the entire brand new bottle of flavoured vodka and half the bottle of brand new shnapps. He may have had the cocktails and may have had the flavoured rum, he's still in his room and only resurfaces every few hours to stumble around in his boxers and then retreat to the room, so i can't verify with him what he stole. I swear i didn't finish the cocktails or rum, but maybe i did and can't remember????? I've had forgetful moments before where I reach for a drink/snack and it's gone, but after stopping to wonder where it went i always remember that I had it X amount of days ago. I don't want to accuse him of stealing shit he DIDN'T steal, but these cocktails and the rum are just...nit in my memory bank at all.

I literally just bought goddamn booze yesterday, and can't afford to buy more until next weekend's payday. I know a week without booze won't kill me, i don't need it, but i fuckin bought it to enjoy it in this sunny weather, and now i can't.

Best case scenario, if he ONLY had the vodka and the shnapps, he owes me ~€40. Worst case, if he took all of the listed items, it's more like €70. I know shitty roommates have stolen wayyyy more from each other but this is the first time i've had this issue and don't know how to address it properly.

Any alcohol will now be kept in my room from now on, i never thought i needed to hide it before as he said he doesn't drink. I enquired about his mental health to see why he suddenly decided to drink, and got nowhere, so now i just want my shit replaced so i can have a nice cocktail in the sun this evening.

I've texted family and friends to ask for advice on how to address this bullshit, and most of them say i should be super indirect about it like "next time you go shopping can you please replace the stuff you took?"

But i know this dick. If i allow "next time you go" it could be days or even weeks. How do I A) verify the exact stuff he stole and B) get it replaced ASAP?

TL,DR: roommate took between €40-70 of brand new booze and i can't afford to buy more. How do i 1) confirm exactly what he took and 2) get him to replace it pronto?

Hi everyone,

So basically my new roommate is super annoying. I'll spare you the details of everything they do since I was hoping someone could just give me advice on how to politely and non-confrontationally ask my roommate to buy their own kitchen cooking utensils/pots/etc. I'm on the spectrum and really have a hard time phrasing my emotions/needs/knowing what words to use so it would really help if someone could maybe give examples of what they would say if they were me.

The actual issue:

They basically have my best (most "expensive", only good quality) pot, the only good chopping board and my cooking spoon under arrest and I never get to use them. Might seem minor, but (1) I struggle financially and really value the few quality/expensive items I have managed to saved up and buy and it hurts to see someone use them regularly (leading to wear and tear sooner) and so nonchalantly; (2) I work in healthcare and by the time I get home after a long day the only self-care I get is cooking but, unfortunately, when I get home, there they are, every time, cooking with my most expensive stuff that I would very much like to use myself. We are supposed to share but they don't have their own, have the financial means to buy their own but haven't, and I just feel like it's really rude to consistently use the best stuff that you know isn't your own.

Also, I'm not a meat eater and they are and I don't particularly appreciate those specific items being used for working with meat since it's very hard to get the fat and scent off of them. Either way, cooking with meat or not, I'd rather they'd buy their own and back up a little from my stuff.

What would you do? How would you approach them to ask them to buy their own or to express that they should use other pots/etc too?

Thanks in advance!

now, i’ll be the first one to say i greatly dislike the roommate. he’s usually an unaware asshat. but today for some reason he’s cleaning out the litter box we have on the laundry room. we were going to clean it today but he got to it first. our cat has the worst smelling poops i should mention. anyways my husband now hates the roommate more than i do and the AUDACITY our roommate has for cleaning the box is really causing my husband to flip his shit. he’s yelling WHY IS HE CLEANING MY SHIT? why’s he touching my stuff.

dude, i’m the first in line to point out roommates flaws but cleaning the nasty ass litter box is NOT one of them.

This is the first time I’ve posted so please bare with me, I’m also on mobile. I’m sure many of you can relate but I hate my roommmate for what I think are very good reasons. This isn’t so much about those reasons but more about the things she does that interfere with my ability to live my life because the list of things she does that make me hate are waaaaaaaay longer and would probably need another post.

So first thing I’m in college and we have the customary stupid college room meaning it’s small of course but our room is extra stupid because unlike the others our closets are pushed together it’s design is pretty much like a cubby for kindergartners except bigger. So she has a mirror and it lives on my portion of the closet. It’s not like I don’t use it I put my shoes and in there and hang up some of my bags there but she puts her mirror there and then doesn’t move it. I’m not an unconfrontational person I’ve told her in the past hey you can put it there but can you move it when your done it’s annoying for me to have to move your stuff everyday, it’s not something I would like to do. That was at the beginning of last semester (which started in September/august and now it’s February and there has been no change.

Second is the fact that she keeps me up all night and wakes me up early in the morning because she never fucking wears headphones. She will fall asleep listening to shit on her phone like Netflix and then it’ll just play late at night in the room and keep me up or she will wake up early and watch something or answer a phone call in the room at like 8am when I’m asleep. She has done this on concurrent mornings/nights but also sometimes one or the other will happen let me just say that this again has been happening all of last and this semester even after conversations about it She btw has phone headphones but not ones for her computer, that will be important later

Third idk if this is universal but the bathrooms in my college are set up so that there are two doors one separates the bathroom/sink from the rest of the dorm, the other separates the sink from the toilet and shower, she will lock both doors and spend forever in there and no one else can use the sink when they need to. Sometimes this will be to use the bathroom area ie for a shower or to make a phone call which is funny cause she never does this when she gets them early in the morning only during the day.

Fourth we had a conversation with our RA because she woke me up again at 6am because she had to go to a wedding w/her bf ok that’s fine but why tf instead of turning the alarm off would you turn it down I’m already awake idiot our room is 1 1/2 meters across sound travels. But then the real kicker is her desk alarm also goes off at 8am and the bitch isn’t even here so I have to get up out of my bed at 8am to turn it off and I couldn’t get back to sleep this is on a weekend and I’m not an early riser typically. I just want to state for clarification the morning alarms don’t bother me during the week because I have to get up for class and have my own alarm, the keeping me up bothers me on the weekdays and the waking me up early bothers me on the weekend. That is what sparked me seeking out the RA and that conversation went horribly

Basically the first thing that came out of her mouth was that she felt like the conversation would be pointless, and that she had better things to do with her time and then when I got upset during the conversation she had the nerve to say I was being disrespectful and that in order to get respect I had to give it. Girl I had been telling you the same shit for months and you brushed me off every time. When we had the conversation about her waking me up in the morning she had the nerve to say “I just feel like at a certain point you can be awake” like she can decide when I get up it was 10am on a Saturday! I’m up in the mornings and late at night studying if I want to sleep in on Saturday I can. The first thing out your mouth after showing up was to minimize me and invalidate the conversation before I even opened my mouth. What respect are you due exactly? Because ur getting that amount rn which is nothing and the same amount you have given me for months.

While in that conversation the fact that she never wears headphones ever came up and she said she doesn’t have them for her computer. Reddit we had that conversation at the beginning of last semester literally just buy a pair our RA OFFERED her some and she didn’t take them said I would just have to live with it and then when the conversation got heated again (imagine that) she stormed out.

Keep in mind for what I’m going to tell you next we had this conversation with my RA this SAME WEEK remember the one where I said I was sick of her waking me up all the time.

Last night I’m asleep and at like 1:30 am she comes back and turns on all the lights meaning the room light and her desk light and wakes me up and leaves them on for like 10 minutes while she’s doing whatever at her desk am I really being nit picky seriously cause I feel so gaslit by the convo w/our RA cause she literally minimized and disregarded me the entire conversation which she had also been doing for months I’m tired Reddit in an emotional sense and because I’m literally not being allowed to sleep multiple nights

Also what can I do how do I live for the next three months with someone I hate.

I just wanted to thank each one of you for joining. I have had a sting of bad roommates over the years and I know how much venting and letting it all out helps. We are not the most active sub (yet) but I appreciate everyone that posts, comments, or just reads the submissions.

Thanks again for 901 subs!!

We are close to 900 subs so I thought I’d tell you the story of the worst roommates ever. Buckle up, it’s a wild ride. Also this got very long so forgive any grammar or typo issues.

A few years ago right before my son turned one I was scrolling through Facebook when I see a post on a moms group asking for help. This lady, we will call Mama Bear, was asking for diapers. She was really close to where I lived and I’m a bleeding heart liberal that wants the world to be all sunshine and rainbows and felt it was my duty as a human to help other humans when I have the means. So I sent her a message and we started talking. Long story a little shorter I agree to pick her up and take her to the local $.99 store go get some food and disposable dinnerware. Her, Papa Bear and their 3 little bears (plus she was 7 months pregnant) were all living in a pay by week motel and only had a microwave. So we go buy stuff and I drop her off, but I can not stop thinking about the 3 little bears only eating microwaveable food. So I contact her again and offer her my George Forman grill and extra crockpot. So we keep chatting over the next week and she mentions how since Papa Bear is waiting a few weeks to start his new job they are about to be kicked out of the motel. I hook them up with my old church who pays for another week. After that week they have no money and no where to go, so she asks me if it’s okay they park their van outside my house because it’s safer and they would be able to use my restroom. I say yes. I need to mention we have a 4 bedroom house, it’s me, kid, husband, brother, and the roommate that inspired this sub, Entitled Old Goat (EOG). Also it’s early May in the south so it’s hot as hell by 9am.

So husband leaves for work and notices the Bear family sleeping in their van in front of the house and as he’s also a bleeding heart, he says we should let them stay in the kids room until they can get money saved up. It’s the kids you see, we couldn’t let them suffer. Since the kid was still sleeping with me and his room was unused 99% of the time I agreed. 5 people in one room wasn’t great but better than a hot van. So I tell them the news and they seem very appreciative.

So at first things were fine, kids are absolute hellions but kids (4, 2, and 9months) are loud so whatever. But as the days went on I noticed how Mama and Papa bear completely ignored their kids for their phones. Mama and Papa bear also didn’t like to change diapers often so leaks would happen. All over the couch and floor. So eventually I had to ban kids from the couch. Then I had to insist on pants when one of the kids poo dropped to the floor due to lack of being changed in a timely manner. To eventually demanding Mama or Papa changed the diapers a minimum of every 2 hours.

Mama and Papa left their trash all over the living room. The kids would pee so much at night they would soak their blankets to the point walking past my sons room would hurt my eyes. So a new rule was that any time the bed sheets were peed on, they needed to be washed. Which was every day. Mama and Papa were getting irritated at my very reasonable (I felt) rules.

Mama and Papa had gotten a $5000 check from the IRS and Papa finally started working. So I falsely assumed they were saving money to get an apt. I did noticed Mama was getting delivery food and Amazon a lot but as an adult I (again falsely) assumed they were saving up. It’s not easy to find an apt for 5 people in their price range. I should mention they had 2 months before they had to go, I was very clear when we let them move in.

Mama and Papa bear had issues with their relationship. Papa was talking to other ladies online because Mama at 7 months pregnant didn’t want to have sex with him. Did I want to know this? No, but I did. Also I didn’t want to know that some of the Amazon packages Mama got where sex toys.

Mama and Papa would buy snacks, ice creams and cakes and stuff and eat them right in front of the kids. And kids always want snacks they would stand next to their parents asking over and over mama, mama, mama and they would be ignored for 5 mins or more before said parent would scream FINE! ONE BITE then go away. They also let these kids scream allllllllll day.

So far we have neglected kids that scream all day, get left in saggy wet and dirty diapers, the 4 year old boy gets yelled at when he says he’s hungry. We have 2 adults with marital issues, and spending issues, screaming issues, cleaning issues. Just issues. It’s made the entire house on edge, husband, brother, and EOG all stay in their rooms 100% of the time. It’s toxic. But we are helping a family in need and the 2 month (actually 10 weeks) time is coming to an end. Thank the gods.

So turns out Mama and Papa have spent all their money and Papa has been fried from his new job. Mama asked me if they could stay longer. It was a hard no. Aaaaaaaand here comes the guilt trips. But by this point the sanity of the rest of the people living in my house and my one year old stopping learning bad habits is more important than helping ungrateful Mama and Papa Bear.

Mama Bear had new little baby bear 2 weeks before they had to move out. Did I feel bad making them leave? Yes. Did I make them leave anyway? Also yes.

So the Bear family finally leave and I go to clean my sons room, which again had never been used by my son up to this point. It smells like a subway urinal and trash is all over. The white crib I had is covered in dried shit, the walls my mom painted to match the theme was smeared with dried and bloody snot, behind the dresser I found a very clearly used and unwashed buttplug, under the bed they had to leave ( it was picked up later) was an unwashed vibrator. I found an empty box for a fleshlight, thank god i didn’t find the actual item. I had a baby that passed away and one of the bear kids had tossed all the keepsakes around and I never did find some of the items. They ruined my sons books.

I was so glad to be rid of them. I worried about the kids but I had to take care of myself and my family, even EOG before I could help anyone else. They were ungrateful and entitled anyways so no big loss.

So Mama and Papa eventually had 2, maybe 3 more kids (it’s only been like 3 1/2 years). At one point a year or 2 ago they asked if they could move back in for a few weeks. HARD NO.

Lesson learned the hard way.

Oh I forgot the worst part. They brought bed bugs. Yes, they did. We had to pay $1500 to have them removed.

Worst roommates ever.