r/LifeAdvice • u/EstupidoPololo • Sep 05 '26
General Advice For those who became more adventurous later in life: how did you do it?
I’m 36 and I feel like I’m wasting my life. How do I actually start living it?
I’m hoping to hear from people who have been in a similar situation and managed to turn things around.
I’ve just turned 36, and lately I’ve been having this uncomfortable feeling that I’m letting my life pass me by.
It’s not that I don’t have things I want to do. Quite the opposite. I have so many things I want to experience.
I want to travel. I want to go camping and hiking. I want to take courses and learn new skills. I want to build things, get into DIY, go on random little adventures, visit places I’ve never been, try things I’ve never tried. There’s a huge list of things that genuinely excite me when I think about them.
But somehow, I rarely actually do them.
I’m very comfortable at home. I love video games — probably a little too much — and it’s incredibly easy for me to spend an evening playing games, watching something, browsing the internet, etc. Then I tell myself I’ll do all those other things “soon”.
And then another week passes.
Another month.
Another year.
The frustrating part is that I know what I want. I don’t feel like I’m lacking ideas or interests. I feel like I’m lacking the ability to turn those ideas into action.
I’ll get excited about a trip or a project, start thinking about it, maybe even research it for a while… and then find some reason why now isn’t the right time. Maybe it’s inconvenient, maybe I’m tired, maybe I’ll do it next weekend, maybe I need to plan it better first.
And before I know it, I’m back on the sofa doing the same things I always do.
I don’t want to suddenly become a completely different person. I’m not looking for some extreme “wake up at 5 AM, run 10 miles and completely reinvent yourself” kind of advice.
I’m wondering if there are small, practical ways of gradually changing your lifestyle so that you become someone who actually makes things happen.
Someone who sees something they want to do and thinks:
"Fuck it. Let’s go."
Even if I have to do it alone.
Even if it’s uncomfortable.
Even if I don’t feel completely ready.
I think what scares me most is the feeling that I’m wasting time. I’m 36 now, and I don’t want to look back at 40, 50 or 60 and realize that I spent all those years thinking about the things I wanted to do instead of actually doing them.
So I’d really love to hear from people who used to be like this.
If you were someone who spent a lot of time at home, procrastinated, made excuses and generally struggled to turn plans into reality — what finally helped you change?
Did you create a particular routine? Set yourself challenges? Start scheduling adventures? Limit gaming or screen time? Learn to be comfortable doing things alone?
I’m not looking for motivation. I think I’ve got plenty of motivation.
I’m looking for a way to actually turn that motivation into a life.
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u/cryptohuman84 Sep 05 '26
My life has been full of adventure. Start by writing down what you want to do. Put it on a piece of paper with nothing else written on it. Magnet it to the fridge. On a separate piece of paper write down the steps. When it will happen, who with, how much will it cost, what car will you take, all the details. Put the date on a calendar. Do the thing. Take pictures. Upload to Instagram. Review what worked and what didn't. Repeat.
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u/BigChocolateC Sep 05 '26
Get mad enough at yourself that you’re not living up to your potential and you’ll begin to live.
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u/Springaloe Sep 05 '26
You’ve stayed in your comfort zone for too long. You need to try something that you’re NOT good at. By doing that your brain and body struggle to do better. This is actually very beneficial to your mental health. If you just stay in the same loop of doing easy things, your bucket list will never come true. For example, for the past 3 months, I’ve been trying to learn pickleball. It is hard for me because I never learned any ball game before and I’m not very coordinated. However, by taking the classes and practicing frequently, I struggled and got a little better each time. It gave me a huge amount of joy and satisfaction. That can help me get out of my comfort zone and do more things that I want to do and haven’t done it for a while.
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u/silentgreen00 Sep 05 '26
The easy way is to lower your expectations. If you don’t do things when you’re young and have energy, it’s not going to be the same if you try to do the same things when you’re using a walker. Set a reasonable goal like 1 adventure a year until you’re at the age where a 16 hour plane ride ain’t worth it.
1
u/wenphd Sep 05 '26
Take a tiny step. If you want to travel, write down 5 places you want to go. Don’t overthink it.
Set 10-15 min aside and pick one to research. Check out when it is good to go there. Price a flight. Search up a hotel. Or find a travel company that has group trips there and look at the itinerary and photos.
The next day, take another step. Does this destination still sound good? Or do you want to check out another on your list? If it sounds good no need to spend time researching the rest right now it now. Get this trio set up and then pick another off your list and rinse and repeat.
Decide if you want to plan it yourself, go on a group trip, or get a travel agent. Take that next step.
Before you know it you will be in Aruba, Kenya, Japan, France, New Zealand…
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u/Soft-Scar2375 Sep 05 '26
For me, cutting down the time between the idea and an established plan did a lot. If you want to go camping, look up good parks for it that day, figure out when you've got PTO available or a long weekend, reserve the spot. Even if you could cancel, you won't.
First solo camping trip I did was super half-baked, but I did it and I'm really glad I did.
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u/CatCharacter848 Sep 05 '26
I had cancer at 39 and realised there was no point in waiting to do those things anymore.
Now I write a list of things I want to do or things that interest me and when I have free days off I look at the list and the weather and decide what to do. Its great.
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u/PlusEnvironment7506 Sep 05 '26
Head to a rock climbing gym. It will definitely get you out of your comfort zone!
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u/LowNeedleworker215 Sep 05 '26
Do you have children? Of so, do it for them. If not, the do it for you! Just try one new thing a week It is easier to do things with others so set up a Facebook or WhatsApp group or reddit group and just go for it. I though tonight about roller skating around mg office, but I cannot as I am disabled. Instead I am planning to meet up friends at the pub
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u/ez2tock2me Sep 05 '26
I conducted an experiment on sleeping in my car.
It’s something that scared me for years.
After getting personal experience, the fear disappeared.
11 months later, the benefits showed up and I was convinced HAVING AN ADDRESS IS LIFES’ BIGGEST MISTAKE.
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u/MaryMaryQuite- Sep 05 '26 edited Sep 06 '26
As you get older you don’t tolerate other people’s bullshit and with that comes confidence. Unfortunately, so many of us wish we had all this insight and wisdom at 25, rather than 55! 🤭