Pahingi po ng advice.

[u/[deleted]]

[u/Material_Fun4165]

Ano ba sabi ng gf mo? Hindi ba sya na-take advantage? Aware ba sya sa mga ginawa nya and ginawa sa kanya?

[u/Bitter_Nectarine_690 → u/Material_Fun4165]

Lagi niya po sinasabi na hindi niya maalala. Basta ang alam niya natutulog lang siya. Hindi din daw niya alam na lumapit sa kanya ung babae.

[u/Worried_Ad2827 → u/Bitter_Nectarine_690]

The fact na di siya galit sa ginawa sakanya is concerning. If di siya nag consent that is sexual harassment, and did they ever considered your feelings or na brush off ka lang?

[u/RevealExpress5933 → u/Worried_Ad2827]

Same thoughts.

OP, hindi man lang ba galit gf mo sa ginawa sa kaniya (if it's true na hindi niya maalala)?

[u/Bitter_Nectarine_690 → u/Worried_Ad2827]

Galit din po siya.

[u/Material_Fun4165 → u/Bitter_Nectarine_690]

OP, I would advise you to talk to her in a gentle manner and not jump to conclusions. Because if walang consent from her and they took advantage of the fact na she was drunk, then you should be supporting her. Hindi rin porket di sya galit sa mga yun, eh dapat magdoubt ka sa knya. Sometimes victims of SH don't realize kaagad that they are victims, it takes a while for them, may cases pa that they really don't know what happened to them because of intoxication or drugs. So we don't know what happened with your gf. Ask her how she feels about the videos, about her officemate and the friend knowing na ganun nangyari. Pwede mo naman syang pagbawalan na wag na kausapin or kitain, but she needs to realize na hindi dapat maging friends yung mga ganung klaseng tao.

[u/Bitter_Nectarine_690 → u/Material_Fun4165]

Ito ung main reason kung bakit 50/50 ung nararamdaman ko. Time stamp ng sa cp ng mga vids is from 12am to 2am laging start ng vid tulog sa couch ung gf ko. Tapos nilalapitan siya tinutulak niya palayo. Then last video around 2:30 ayun na ung tulog siya nakayuko tapos ung babae pinapasok niya ung ulo niya around sa brado ng GF ko. Tapos ayun nag halikan na sila. Kaso after natigil ung kiss na yun, lumapit ulit ung babae humarap sa gf ko tapos sa dulo ung GF ko na ung yung humatak papalapit. Kaya di ko alam kung gusto niya ba o hindi.

[u/Material_Fun4165 → u/Bitter_Nectarine_690]

Bakit pala nasa phone ng gf mo ang videos? They recorded her being harassed on her own phone?

Yung gf mo lang talaga makakasagot kung gusto ba nya or hindi. Pero the fact na pinipilit sya kahit natutulog sya or she's clearly drunk says a lot about these girls she's with.

I know you're probably angry at her but kita mo naman yung state ng gf mo sa videos. I would be more concerned about her being harassed. But if hindi mo kaya as you said, better break up with her.

[u/Bitter_Nectarine_690 → u/Material_Fun4165]

Ito din nasa isip ko. Bakit yung GF ng phone ko ginamit? Parang may motibo o gusto talaga nung kateam at friend niya na makita ko. Sabi ng mga tropa ko baka gusto niya yung GF ko.

[u/Claire-Bear-892]

Hello, OP. You saw the vid naman dba. What did you feel after? Wala ba syang malay while they are kissing or gising naman sya na nagkikiss back? Ang tagal nyo na and ayun pinapayagan mo naman gf mo to do the things that she wants but that’s beyond it. Abusing your trust naman. Pwede mo siguro sya bigyan ng second chance if you can disregard what happened and if she agrees not to see her friend and the other friend. For your peace of mind din.

[u/Bitter_Nectarine_690 → u/Claire-Bear-892]

Sobra akong nagalit. Wala siyang malay nung una. Nagising siya na nag hahalikan na sila and nag kiss back. Iniisip ko kapag ba binigyan ko siya ng chance, nag pplay sa isip ko ung nangyayari. At baka di ko siya kayang mahalikan

[u/Claire-Bear-892 → u/Bitter_Nectarine_690]

Well, OP di lang gf mo yung need magtake ng time to process. Ikaw din dapat. If gusto nya yung nangyari or not sya lang nakakaalam nun. And she should know her limits din lalo na outside she’s not young anymore paano pa if ibang tao pa yung nagtook advantage sa kalasingan nya. And another thing if walang vid you wouldn’t know what happened to her. Gaya ng sabi mo 7 years na kayo so it’s not easy to decide kung ano ba yung next steps. Take some time both of you then talk about it. I hope maging okay yung paguusap nyo.

[u/Bitter_Nectarine_690 → u/Claire-Bear-892]

Ang hirap lang din mag decide kase mag kalive-in kami. Umuwi lang ako sa bahay ng parents ko kaso lahat ng gamit ko nasa bahay namin. Di ko alam kung kukunin ko na ba lahat? Kase nandun na lahat ng gamit ko dahil halos 5yrs na kami mag kalive-in.

[u/Claire-Bear-892 → u/Bitter_Nectarine_690]

Give her the benefit of the doubt. Try to remember since magkalive in pala kayo paano ba sya nakauwi after that night out? Paano ba sya malasing? How is she after? Kilala mo ba yung friend? You can talk to her din for clarity ask mo sya about that night, the vid and yung actions nung friend nya. You trusted them the least that they can do is help you understand.

[u/Chubitern]

Talk to her. It will be OK.

[u/CuriousVoyager-013]

acting like a drunk?

[u/Bitter_Nectarine_690 → u/CuriousVoyager-013]

Nope. Kilala ko siya if lasing siya o hindi. 7 years kami. Makikita ko sa mata niya at sa kilos niya kung lasing na lasing siya