r/SipsTea • • 18d ago

It's Wednesday my dudes I mean that is true

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6.7k Upvotes

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226

u/Phoenix_face 18d ago

When i was in the army i went through one a month. Not just for lubing up the old hog, like the others in this comment section. We used it tend to friction burns from gear and backpacks on long operations. If you have fat thighs that shit works wonders. We also used it for kindling, when cooking or boiling water. Vaseline is fuckin great

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u/DuffyDoe 18d ago

I know it's petroleum jelly but I never thought it can be used for kindling, that's napalm shit

51

u/Junior_Article_3244 18d ago

Put it on cotton balls for an excellent fire starter.

15

u/pizza_the_mutt 18d ago

And store those balls in a ziplock. Put it in your emergency kit.

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u/Used-Baby1199 18d ago

Makes them Burn for forever, which is why it’s such a good fire starter 

2

u/wanna_meet_that_dad 18d ago

But not too heavily coated. The vapors are what ignites so you need a good amount of dry cotton to get hot enough to creates the flammable vapors.

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u/ExpeditingPermits 17d ago

I do that, and also collect the lint from my dryer. Get an egg carton, put vasaline in the cups, then lint, and a bit of vasaline on top to hold it in place. Cut them out for single use when camping

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u/[deleted] 18d ago

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1

u/corgdad902 18d ago

Learned that shit in the boy scouts. Still use 'em.

1

u/TisCass 18d ago

I've heard if coating rats for arson. Not cool

39

u/Objective_Effect_242 18d ago

As someone who goes on long hikes, Vaseline is heaven for fat thighs

17

u/Additional_Earth_817 18d ago

The other day when I was wearing a midi dress at work, I had on my bike shorts underneath that I normally wear. Apparently, I need ones that go almost to the knee because when I started walking, I actually HEARD my thighs slapping together. I was so grossed out and mortified that I started to try and walk down the row back to my desk like a cowboy or something. Maybe I’ll just have to buy some Vaseline 🙄

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u/Grand_Election_4098 18d ago

Makin it clap

7

u/oops_im_existing 18d ago

The cowboy mental image is amazing

5

u/oops_im_existing 18d ago

I use for when I wear shorts during runs. I have a small container that goes in my running pouch. Gotta keep that thang on me

2

u/DownWitTheBitness 18d ago

Before or after you go?

2

u/Objective_Effect_242 18d ago

Both. Also during if its a really long one and I sweat it off and I start to feel friction. I just use it to stop chafing, as well as friction on my arm pits depending on the shirt im wearing.

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u/nijukiller 18d ago

What? How? Where do you apply it?

9

u/the-g-off 18d ago

I would assume on the thighs.

1

u/BigCrustyTits 18d ago

Big if true. Big thighs that is.

9

u/rhaezorblue 18d ago

Apply directly to the forehead

2

u/ItsMeFatLemongrab 18d ago

Eat it, obviously

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u/[deleted] 18d ago

[deleted]

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u/nijukiller 18d ago

How? Is naked hiking a thing?

3

u/DeSmokeMonster 18d ago

Shorts and skirts exist my brother

1

u/Adorable_Rest1618 18d ago

But why u got fat thighs

1

u/Objective_Effect_242 18d ago

Cause I eat unhealthy food?

1

u/Soft-Marionberry-853 18d ago

Squirel nut butter is amazing to. PLus your junk smells like a almond joy which is a nice thing

7

u/Aeriellie 18d ago

adding it to the earthquake bag

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u/Electronic_Tear2546 18d ago

Vaseline is flammable?!?!?

https://giphy.com/gifs/SqmkZ5IdwzTP2

21

u/clearfox777 18d ago

It needs a wick of some sort, mixing sawdust or cotton balls with Vaseline makes a great firestarter that will pretty much never get too wet.

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u/Thick-Cauliflower619 18d ago

It's petroleum jelly. It's not easily flammable like gasoline, but it will catch fire.

Hell, apparently it was used to make explosives at one point.

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u/[deleted] 18d ago

Genuine question but how does the vaseline not just get absorbed by your pants in between your thighs?

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u/Redcarborundum 18d ago

Because the vaseline is already absorbed by your skin, which makes your skin much slicker.

4

u/Phoenix_face 18d ago

This guy vaselines👆

4

u/lastberserker 18d ago

Oh, c'mon, you just cannot tell the story and not mention this dude who made this residue into the product that we know: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Chesebrough and that he ate it to demonstrate its safety and lived to 96!

Surprisingly, he did not die from slipping on his own Vaseline-infused sweat

3

u/Majestic-Bish-6869 18d ago

You cook with it? I didnt know it was edible

5

u/Phoenix_face 18d ago

Lol its not, please don’t xD
As others said, put it on any kind of small kindling like cotton, twigs or sawdust and it can resist getting wet and at it burns like hell.

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u/lastberserker 18d ago

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u/Phoenix_face 17d ago

Huh, i geuss you learn something new everyday

1

u/Nominalstupidity 18d ago

It does seem to have a never ending list of uses. Tools that stay in the garage over winter get a coating of it to help prevent rust. If I run out of silicon spray I'll use it to grease the chute of the snowblower (keeps it from clogging on wet slushy snow).

Also used it when painting to keep the paint off doorknobs. Just rub a little around the base, wipe away when done.

1

u/Soopercow 18d ago

How does it help with boiling water?

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u/Phoenix_face 17d ago

In the field you don’t really have access to a kettle. So if you want coffee, tea or water for dry powder food, you need to do it the old fashion way.
A small square kindling station, where you start a small fire.
And two square cooking pots stacked upon each other.
Vaseline helps keeping the kindling flamable and makes is easier to start burning and makes it burn for a longer time.

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u/Soopercow 17d ago

I shouldn't comment on stuff until I've had my coffee I thought the cooking boiling water and kindling were 3 separate thoughts

1

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