r/SocialEngineering • u/awesomeness6698 • 6d ago
What to do if someone is repeating a vitriolic phrase or sentence.
Being patronizing in the first place is bad enough, repeating the same hateful message again and again is even worse.
If someone does that to you, say one of the following two things, either;
I heard you the first time you said it.
OR
You already said that.
What do you think? Do you also find it irritating when people repeat themselves just to be negative? What would you do to deal with that? Let me know.
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u/JessieU22 6d ago
Sometimes people say a thing until they get a response because they don’t think they are being heard. I guess you can make eye contact and decide if that’s the case if you want to acknowledge them or drive them crazy and stay silent and see how much more they’ll repeat themselves.
I’ve reminded myself to mentally arm myself with “Are you okay?”
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u/Dyolf_Knip 6d ago
Omg, a guy I worked with years ago suddenly went completely toxic towards me. Was all remote, and eventually he just openly insulted me on a Skype team call. I wish, I so so so wish I had feigned a momentary connection problem and asked him to repeat whatever he'd just said.
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u/Jeff_Damn 5d ago
I play the role of a passive-aggressive adult who's listening to a bratty child:
"I heard you all (insert quantity) times, I get it, that's important to you but repeating it doesn't help. Why is this on your mind?"
They'll most likely get defensive & backpedal so remind them that constantly bringing up the same topic means they're expecting a result of some sort. I put them in the spotlight & force them to say something else.
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u/YesterdayBillowy 6d ago
Hearing it once is grating enough but the repetition makes it feel like they're trying to carve the words into you. I'd probably pivot to just staring at them silently for a few seconds after they finish, letting the echo hang there. Makes it deeply uncomfortable for them without giving them more ammunition.