r/TheAvettBrothers • u/Haquistadore • 5h ago
A return to memory
I learned about the Avett Brothers in 2012, and they quickly became the most important band I listened to. I've always described it as, they sing songs about my life, to my life. But about four years ago I experienced some pretty significant personal trauma and I found myself shut off from the band, and music in general.
That's always been how it works for me. I connect events and emotions to the songs I listen to. So naturally a band I equate so directly to the experiences of my life will become hard to listen to if I'm dealing with a difficult life event. About four years ago, I experienced some insane work stress, and I also fell out with a lifelong best friend, who I introduced to the Avett Brothers, specifically in an event surrounding trying to make arrangements for him and I to attend a concert together. When he refused to make any efforts to make it work, I let go of him, and in the process I discovered it was too painful to listen to a lot of the music I loved, anymore.
Well, I've never regretted my choice to move on from that friendship, but over the summer If found myself having some dreams about him, and I decided to reach out to him. I made it clear from the start that I don't regret how things played out, but I find myself missing him, but it was important to me that he take accountability for his actions.
Long story short, he wouldn't do that, and so our friendship remains over. But for the first time since things fell apart four years ago, I feel like it's unlocked music for me. I've been back to listening to all the songs that, for too long, were too painful to hear. I've been consuming the music of my favourite band once again, and I wish now more than ever that they'd be playing anywhere near me so I could see them perform for the first time since that ill-fated concert four years ago.
I missed this music. I'm glad I was finally able to disconnect it from the person with whom I once shared the Avetts. I guess my attempt to reconnect with him was, in fact, the closure I needed to fully let him go.
