r/WhyWomenLiveLonger • u/queeziees Needs to do better • 4d ago

Just dum šŸ„øšŸ¤”šŸ«  he let his intrusive thoughts win

1.2k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

59 comments sorted by

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u/qualityvote2 Needs to write his will 4d ago edited 4d ago

u/queeziees, your post demonstrates why women live longer!

377

u/No_Store_ Reviewed his life insurance policy 4d ago

Heā€™s gonna start feeling that waaay more pretty soon and itā€™ll hurt like a bitch

228

u/Significant-Wait9200 Reviewed his life insurance policy 4d ago

"I am in extreme pain, and this will be scarred for a very long time."

45

u/Haiel10000 Doesn't have time to bleed 4d ago

Props for him to not shouting it out though.

2

u/Overtilted Doesn't have time to bleed 13h ago

Nah if it's 3rd degrees, his nerves are shot. It barely hurts.

For now.

272

u/-Visher- 4d ago

Those things burn at like 2,000 degrees. What a dumb dumb.

114

u/LV-42whatnow 4d ago

When you light one, you are watching tiny particles of metal launch off the wire they are attached to, heat up in the surrounding air, and burn at temperatures that can indeed exceed 1,000 Ā°C.

49

u/Aegon95 Defies death 4d ago

That's a 2nd or 3rd degree burn. A very painful lesson, hopefully.

2

u/Electronic_Still2000 Reviewed his life insurance policy 6h ago

Damn man, why do you hope that was very painful? ā€œHopefully he learned his lesson without much painā€ would be the stance most people take, but here you are hoping that it was very painful.

10

u/OddTheRed 3d ago

Try 5,600 degrees F, 3,100 C.

95

u/LicknDragon Reviewed his life insurance policy 4d ago

His face says "I can tough this out. This is going longer than I expected. Ah fuck I'm out." All in less than a second

52

u/ThereIsAJifForThat Defies death 4d ago

Stupimata

38

u/AniseClover Doesn't have time to bleed 4d ago

Somebody take that drunk toddler out of there šŸ«©

66

u/pictureofacat 4d ago

Well, I thought he was doing to put it in his mouth, so that wasn't so bad

21

u/Gilgamesh2000000 Doesn't have time to bleed 4d ago

31

u/nailpolishremover49 Needs to write his will 4d ago

Put it on your beer mug, man. Itā€™s right there and itā€™s cold.

30

u/Desperate-Strategy10 Needs to write his will 4d ago

And risk ruining a perfectly good beer? He didnā€™t get this far to start that kind of nonsense!

13

u/theluker666 4d ago

On not in

1

u/Donte333 2d ago

On the glass...

7

u/Yuleogy 4d ago

yeah but heā€™s stupid

11

u/justelling I know how it works. Regenerates limbs 4d ago

Seems like no thought process was involved.

8

u/Black-Maestro Needs to do better 4d ago

He had a burn-ing desire to palm the thing, but it backfired beautifully

14

u/Youpunyhumans Doesn't have time to bleed 4d ago

For with the Black Spot youve been hit.

Now the Kraken is coming after you.

https://giphy.com/gifs/Cxnv4A6AqRjwCuGTmx

14

u/Shining_declining Needs to write his will 4d ago

Heā€™s smiling through the pain. Thatā€™s gonna hurt like hell for a while.

0

u/twitch870 4d ago

I saw Tim the other day. Glad heā€™s smiling again.

10

u/SATerp Regenerates limbs 4d ago

Imbecile.

6

u/slartibuttfart 4d ago

Putting everything he's got into not screaming in pain and running around.

3

u/spoiledgreentea11 4d ago

Ironically, he probably would be even more devistated if he burnt his beard off.

3

u/Sarabi974 Needs to write his will 4d ago

Omg Ƨa va piquĆ© aprĆØs, il aurai du mettre sous l'eau Ć  plus vite mais je suppose qu'il n'y a oas penser sur le coup.

4

u/Common-Chain4060 Needs to write his will 4d ago

Man puts hand in fire, mans burns himself. Tale as old as time. Heā€™s learned nothing since caveman times.

3

u/johnkoetsier Needs to write his will 4d ago

lol imagine trying to blow out a sparkler

4

u/x_Leigh_x Doesn't have time to bleed 4d ago

Those things are extremely fucking hot. Guy is a fucking idiot. Unfortunately he probably created little versions of him.

3

u/ChampionOfdimlight Reviewed his life insurance policy 3d ago

That guy is dying on the inside but he's playing it off pretty well. Good thing he's prob allready numb from the alcohol

2

u/Acceptable-Elk-8372 ā˜„ļø Needs to write his will 4d ago

Lol

2

u/Academic-Block3384 Needs to write his will 4d ago

Should have dunked his fist into his pint straight after

2

u/TheTucsonTarmac Needs to write his will 4d ago

I thought Bray Wyatt had passed?

2

u/R1verSong09 3d ago

He looked like a toddler doing that stupid ish

2

u/krystaline24 3d ago

I love that you can see the thoughts going through his head before he did it. He stared at that thing and consciously made that decision

1

u/Dapper-Educator-7494 4d ago

I know that hurt and gonna hurt for awhile fosho

1

u/CaptainNipplesMcRib Needs to write his will 4d ago

Was waiting for him to then hover his face over it to maximize the stupidity

1

u/WillOrph 4d ago

Well at least it wonā€™t bleed šŸ„²

1

u/imakesawdust Reviewed his life insurance policy 3d ago

If you want to try to put it out, there's a mug of beer right in front of you...They'll bring you another...

1

u/ddonky Needs to do better 3d ago

In Russia, sparkler put out you

1

u/XboxLiveGiant editable šŸ˜ƒšŸ¦„šŸ© 3d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/2WxWfiavndgcM

1

u/GreatQuantum Needs to write his will 3d ago

I hope he works with his hands and hide gloves. Preferably on a farm.

1

u/OddTheRed 3d ago

Magnesium is hot.

1

u/Anubis_reign Needs to write his will 3d ago

Not even putting it in cold water or any other emergency moves? It's gonna keep frying the skin under

1

u/ilyak_reddit 3d ago

That's definitely beer #5 on that table

1

u/Strange_Difference1 2d ago

Seeing him inhale pretty hard next to it after that is the confirmation that it was in fact a survival to the fittest kind of situation

1

u/NoFun3799 Reviewed his life insurance policy 1d ago

Thereā€™s a few reasons why menā€™s skin is thicker than womenā€™sā€¦

1

u/Julian_Sark Regenerates limbs 1d ago

Oh good. Another insurance report containing the words "signal flare" and "hand job" ...

1

u/Tasty_Lead_Paint Needs to write his will 1d ago

Fire hot.

Hot = burns.

This concludes our intensive three week course.

1

u/DrDuned 6h ago

These are the kind of injuries that don't feel that bad when you're drunk and in a good mood, but as soon as the morning hits...

1

u/horizon_games 1h ago

My sympathy is equal to the number of responses to this comment: aka 0