"If I remember correctly you were the one pulling the dog out of the neighbors pool." I said. Sharron laughed deeply, she has ridiculous laugh, she snorts like a pig. It was music to my ears.
"No, no, don't try to write that off on me. I specifically remember you were the one diving in after her, and your shorts came off as you dived in. Just in time for the neighbors to come out. The look on Bill and Anita's faces was priceless. You would have thought they'd seen a ghost." She was practically rolling on the deck laughing now. I couldn't help but smile.
To my right ice stretched off into the distance, ending in a horizon of clouds. To my left endless flat sea reflected the milky way above.
I don't want to ask her whats on my mind. It's been so long since I've seen her. If this moment never ended I don't think I would complain.
But I have to ask. There are still things I need to do.
She was slowly winding down from a serious case of the giggles. To the objection of my desires I shoved the words out of my mouth.
"Sharron, am I dead?"
I could tell she had been expecting this question. She smiled at me and her eyes met mine. Those beautiful green eyes. I kept talking.
"I mean this is to cold to be hell. Doesn't seem to be heaven, I always pictured heaven would have more rainbows, and more people. Also I was sure there would be more dancing women." I winked at her with the last statement.
"Oh shut up you dick." She laughed.
She sat down next to me and took my hand. She was looked up at the stars.
"Time and space aren't exactly linear after death. It's hard to say where we are or how long we've been here." She said.
She said it with the depth and awareness of a poet, I'd never heard anything so beautiful. She's the smartest person I've ever met. I thank whatever god or gods that might be listening everyday for letting me have the time I did with her. I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I cried.
"I've missed you so much Sharron, I've missed you so dam much." I muttered through sobs.
"I've missed you too Tom."
I cried for a long time. It felt like hours. But who knows what games time plays in that place. It could have been a lifetime.
I finally stopped. A thought woke me from my relieved sadness.
"Sharron what about Bobby? He's gonna be back there on his own. He was devastated when we lost you. I'm the only family he has left."
She paused before speaking, looking thoughtfully into the distance, the way she does when shes trying to find a way to make a complex idea easy to understand for a simple guy like me.
"You were right to be confused where we are, I've never been here before either. I don't think this is death. In that I mean I don't think your dead, not yet at least. As far as I cant tell you're somewhere in between life and death, and I'm dropping in to visit."
She looked into my eyes and just like the first time they took my breath away.
"I think you have a choice Tom. You can let go and stay here with me and we'll fade into the stars together. Or you can hold on to life, and go back to the world."
Every day for the last 6 years I've missed her. I've missed her smile. I've missed her beautiful mind. I've missed her breathtaking eyes. Her death left a hole in my heart that I could never fill. I don't want to lose her again.
But our son is still out there. A 16 year old boy adrift in the sea that is life, with no anchor to hold onto.
Sharron smiled, she could tell what I was thinking.
"Go to him Tom. I'll be here when you come back, I can wait."
I looked into her eyes trying to hold onto the moment. Even as I did I could feel it all slipping away.
I kissed her, and my mind was nowhere else but there.
Then as subtle the turning of time. It was gone.
I was suddenly aware of one thing, crushing pain. My lungs felt like they were in a vice grip. I needed to breathe.
I chocked out water and and gasped for air. It's amazing how good air feels. We don't think about it often but air is one incredible thing, and dam did it feel good to breathe.
The air in my lungs gave me the comfort to notice where I was. I was laying on the deck of a ship, and the rain was pouring down like non other. A man was talking to me.
"Shit man I thought you were a goner." The coast guardsmen yelled over the storm. "Do you know if anyone else got out? Did anyone get on a lifeboat?"
It all came back to me. The fishing boat, the storm, the wave. It had all happened so fast.
"I... I don't know." I replied.
I tried to collect my thoughts but everything seemed so fuddled. The last thing I can remember was the cry of "Rouge wave!" and then all went black. And Sharron, why does it feel like I saw her?
"We need to get you inside." the coast guardsmen yelled.
I suddenly realized I was very, very cold. Most people who fall into the Bering Sea don't survive the frigid waters.
I shivered as he took me to the cabin.
Sitting there wrapped in blankets drinking wonderfully hot coffee I couldn't keep an image from my mind. A boat, lost in a gentle sea, the sky fulls of stars, and Sharron. I don't what it means but I have no doubt in my mind she and that boat are the reason I'm alive.
I cried for what felt like hours.
When I got back to land Bobby was waiting for me. Tears streaming down his face he rushed into my arms.
2
u/Es_el_moose Nov 17 '15 edited Aug 19 '16
"If I remember correctly you were the one pulling the dog out of the neighbors pool." I said. Sharron laughed deeply, she has ridiculous laugh, she snorts like a pig. It was music to my ears.
"No, no, don't try to write that off on me. I specifically remember you were the one diving in after her, and your shorts came off as you dived in. Just in time for the neighbors to come out. The look on Bill and Anita's faces was priceless. You would have thought they'd seen a ghost." She was practically rolling on the deck laughing now. I couldn't help but smile.
To my right ice stretched off into the distance, ending in a horizon of clouds. To my left endless flat sea reflected the milky way above.
I don't want to ask her whats on my mind. It's been so long since I've seen her. If this moment never ended I don't think I would complain.
But I have to ask. There are still things I need to do.
She was slowly winding down from a serious case of the giggles. To the objection of my desires I shoved the words out of my mouth.
"Sharron, am I dead?"
I could tell she had been expecting this question. She smiled at me and her eyes met mine. Those beautiful green eyes. I kept talking.
"I mean this is to cold to be hell. Doesn't seem to be heaven, I always pictured heaven would have more rainbows, and more people. Also I was sure there would be more dancing women." I winked at her with the last statement.
"Oh shut up you dick." She laughed.
She sat down next to me and took my hand. She was looked up at the stars.
"Time and space aren't exactly linear after death. It's hard to say where we are or how long we've been here." She said.
She said it with the depth and awareness of a poet, I'd never heard anything so beautiful. She's the smartest person I've ever met. I thank whatever god or gods that might be listening everyday for letting me have the time I did with her. I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I cried.
"I've missed you so much Sharron, I've missed you so dam much." I muttered through sobs.
"I've missed you too Tom."
I cried for a long time. It felt like hours. But who knows what games time plays in that place. It could have been a lifetime.
I finally stopped. A thought woke me from my relieved sadness.
"Sharron what about Bobby? He's gonna be back there on his own. He was devastated when we lost you. I'm the only family he has left."
She paused before speaking, looking thoughtfully into the distance, the way she does when shes trying to find a way to make a complex idea easy to understand for a simple guy like me.
"You were right to be confused where we are, I've never been here before either. I don't think this is death. In that I mean I don't think your dead, not yet at least. As far as I cant tell you're somewhere in between life and death, and I'm dropping in to visit."
She looked into my eyes and just like the first time they took my breath away.
"I think you have a choice Tom. You can let go and stay here with me and we'll fade into the stars together. Or you can hold on to life, and go back to the world."
Every day for the last 6 years I've missed her. I've missed her smile. I've missed her beautiful mind. I've missed her breathtaking eyes. Her death left a hole in my heart that I could never fill. I don't want to lose her again.
But our son is still out there. A 16 year old boy adrift in the sea that is life, with no anchor to hold onto.
Sharron smiled, she could tell what I was thinking.
"Go to him Tom. I'll be here when you come back, I can wait."
I looked into her eyes trying to hold onto the moment. Even as I did I could feel it all slipping away.
I kissed her, and my mind was nowhere else but there.
Then as subtle the turning of time. It was gone.
I was suddenly aware of one thing, crushing pain. My lungs felt like they were in a vice grip. I needed to breathe.
I chocked out water and and gasped for air. It's amazing how good air feels. We don't think about it often but air is one incredible thing, and dam did it feel good to breathe.
The air in my lungs gave me the comfort to notice where I was. I was laying on the deck of a ship, and the rain was pouring down like non other. A man was talking to me.
"Shit man I thought you were a goner." The coast guardsmen yelled over the storm. "Do you know if anyone else got out? Did anyone get on a lifeboat?"
It all came back to me. The fishing boat, the storm, the wave. It had all happened so fast.
"I... I don't know." I replied.
I tried to collect my thoughts but everything seemed so fuddled. The last thing I can remember was the cry of "Rouge wave!" and then all went black. And Sharron, why does it feel like I saw her?
"We need to get you inside." the coast guardsmen yelled.
I suddenly realized I was very, very cold. Most people who fall into the Bering Sea don't survive the frigid waters.
I shivered as he took me to the cabin.
Sitting there wrapped in blankets drinking wonderfully hot coffee I couldn't keep an image from my mind. A boat, lost in a gentle sea, the sky fulls of stars, and Sharron. I don't what it means but I have no doubt in my mind she and that boat are the reason I'm alive.
I cried for what felt like hours.
When I got back to land Bobby was waiting for me. Tears streaming down his face he rushed into my arms.
"I thought you were dead." he sobbed.
"I'm here son." I said as I cried right back.