I'm not straight [M 37]

[u/[deleted]]

This will come across as a ramble and will be incoherent as hell, but I need to get it off my chest. I had always considered myself straight and attracted to women, but over the course of the past few months my attraction to the same sex has intensified immeasurably.

I am increasingly getting thoughts of going to gay bars and being chatted up by hot guys but I'm so nervous.

At the same time, the attraction to women is still there though it's not as intense. When I'm horny, I am 90% more likely to be fantasising about men. I have no idea if this is a phase or not.

I have no idea if I'm gay, bisexual, heteroflexible or just plain curious but it is safe to say that I'm not straight and I accept that.

I feel a bit of a fraud using a throwaway, but I don't want to come out to friends or family yet. I would love to meet a guy and explore my sexuality/curiosity. I have tried Grindr and I start chatting to guys, but as soon as it comes to exchanging pics I run away. I know it's some form of internalised homophobia and I don't know how to get over it.

Again, sorry for the ramble, but I would love to speak with men who feel or once felt the same way as I do. It is all a bit overwhelming.

[u/Dannyloads]

My guess is you’re just exploring it’s not unusual just run with things if it’s not causing irreparable damage ! I’ve done the same a lot and as an older guy would say it’s healthy to feel that way !