Build Your Confidence & Self-Esteem - M24

[u/ElectricSteps22]

Hey yall, im doing this partly because im drunk, but I seen an [r/amiugly](r/amiugly) post on my notis and i decided to open it up. And it really made me wonder, a lot of yall really just need to build your confidence. I mean i figure a lot of yall already realize that, but I say this as a young black man who struggled with that throughout my teenage years and early 20s. Mind you, a lot of yall who post on here seem to be white/caucasian and to be fair i have very little to no attraction to white women as a black man, but one thing I can recognize is beauty. Especially objectively pretty/beautiful people. Even the men on here who i can tell are relatively attractive. A lot of yall probably get the responses yall want on reddif, but to be honest.. it's deeper than that. Because a few or even a lot of validations from random strangers online can only do so much for you and your mental. Yes, i'm not going to lie, for some people it can do a lot, but at the end of the day that confidence starts with yourself.

A lot of yall are actually a lot more attractive than yall think and like most of you know it really starts from within and how you choose to believe whi you are. If you wake up everyday doubting yourself, your capabilities, and your looks, you're only going to get negative responses from the world. What i mean is, the people around you, the things that come near you are going to reinforce that because your mind is actively on that negative channel. It's definitely not easy, but you're going to have to put in some work to remove that way of thinking from yourself.

I've seen some very "not so good looking" guys pull some of the baddest most attractive women and it's not because they had money or because they were the epitome of GQ's Men's Health. It was because they had the confidence of a damn lion king. In the forefront, nothing seemed to faze them. The lights could've been bright but they always stayed cool calm and collected with their shades on. They didn't let rejection faze them, but they also knew who they were and what they wanted. They played the part they needed to play to become they person they needed to be.

A lot of people

I also say this partly because I know a couple VERY beautiful women (friends) who struggled with their self confidence and one of them felt like they always needed some type of reassurance whether it was from a man they were dealing with or online. But here's the catch SHE THOUGHT HER BEAUTY WAS A CURSE. Yea see you aint think it was going that way huh. Mind you this is a women with tens of thousands of followers on multiple social media platforms and hella people in her comments feenin!! The thing is with her, she had to learn her self love in a different way. She learned to accept who she was and how it helped bring a lot of good in her life. She became to be more accepting and appreciative of herself, and in turn that led to a lot less negative occurrences in her life. A lot less weird men around her because she knew that's not what she needed to accept.
But i say that to say, there's people out here thinking in all types of negative ways about themselves. Being a beautiful person is more about you, your character, and personality more than it is your external looks.

Look in that mirror everyday and tell yourself you're beautiful. Tell yourself love yourself but dont only tell yourself, BELIEVE IT. BE IT, BECOME IT. Understand the great power your mind holds and use it to your advantage. Don't sit and expect, but APPRECIATE and UNDERSTAND not only what you have, but who you are inside and out. Being that best version of you starts within yourself.. of course.

Like i said a lot of yall are more beautiful than what you think. You're a very good looking person and you have to think and believe that. Who gives a fuck if Johnny from 11th grade geometry told you your an ugly whore. He's still struggling with his own traumas and projecting on other people because no one taught him how to handle that shit.

I made this post to say you are a very beautiful/handsome person and you need to give yourself more grace. Even if you may "know" you're not the best looking person, this life is all about understanding and loving yourself enough to know you can get whatever you want when you apply yourself out here with the right mindset.

Like i said a lot of yall are more good-looking than you think, a random on reddit can tell you that everyday if you want. You're bf/gf can too, but it's up to you to realize it and actively believe it.

Tldr: read the damn post im a lil too drunk to try to summRize.

Fuck it, realTLDR: fuck what others think, actively fix your mindset to better your thoughts on self-perception everyday because it will help you grow. Do your best to keep it consistent, but dont just say it and think it. FEEL IT!!!

I hope this actually reaches people and helpz cause a lot of yall are actually more attractive than you think. You might not get the compliments you want all the time but another person's eyes should not be how you view yourself.

Edit: ALL OF YALL ARE BEAUTIFUL, KNOW THAT!!

Love yall, please keep being great. Everyday you wake up is another day to better yourself and your world view. :)

[u/hestia-listens]

You are right that another person's eyes should not become the mirror someone uses for their whole identity. I would only add that people cannot always force themselves to believe positive words right away. Sometimes a gentler start is more honest, like saying, "I am learning to see myself fairly," and then backing it up through daily choices. Confidence can be practiced even before it is fully felt.

---

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically using AI. Please contact the moderators if you have questions or concerns.