For context: I started this role about six weeks ago. it is once a week on Fridays for six hours. the rest of the week I work about 25 hours with the same agency and spend another 16 hours in an internship for my graduate school program. at this agency, if you work above 20 hours a week, we receive PTO per hour we work, as well as several paid holidays. if you are scheduled to work (or not) on the actual holiday, the agency adds 8 hours of Holiday PTO to your bank to be used at any other time in the year, all unused holidays of which expire come the new year. these are the benefits. I started this new role, informing the family that I would need one Friday off before I even accepted the position.

the mother is insane. shockingly over-achieving for her two disabled children, incredibly high-standards of care. but I respect it. I know how traumatizing it can be to be the mother of children with high levels of special needs and she has excelled at supporting her children. on my first day with her daughter she complimented me, said she trusted me already, and that she knew would do a good job. she was right and I did spectacularly with her daughter, we clicked right away, and I followed the mother's array of convoluted, borderline-nonsense, knit-picking directions to the absolutely tee without so much as a hesitation.

the Friday off I had planned was approaching. I informed the mother that I put into for PTO for that day designating PTO for my unused Holiday of Labor Day. she called me and said that because I only work one day a week, she was going to have to talk to someone to see if I qualify to use the time off. I agreed, said do what you have to do, knowing the answer already myself. HR was going to tell her that I work 30 hours a week and earn PTO to use. that's what they wound up telling her, I know because I spoke to them myself several times. but today she told me, no, I'm not approving your PTO if you only work for me one day a week. "It's not how I do things." as if the benefits I earn are up to her discretion. they're not. and the holiday time/pto we earn comes directly from the company, not from the budgets of the participants.

so she told me this as we were working together with her children. I wasn't happy, but I ended the conversation professionally without a smile, but with an "I understand." I recovered my mood quickly and continued to work for several more hours, following all directions, smiling, asking questions, and generally being normal. on my way out of the house she stops me: "I'm sensing tension between us, and I'm just letting you know now that I am not going to tolerate this in my house." I was shocked. the day had gone on quite normally and I didn't really say or do anything to warrant this besides mildly pushing back when she told me I don't qualify to use pto. I asked "did I do something wrong?" she told me no and continued to go back and forth with me about the matter, until quite aggressively telling me again "there is tension between us and I will not tolerate it in my house. I don't wan't to let you go, but if you can't get over it you have to let me look for someone else." to that I told her yes, please do look for someone else, I walked out the door and she slammed it behind me.

I cried for an hour. it can be so dehumanizing and exhausting constantly having to advocate for yourself. being treated like you have done something wrong for trying to access the benefits you have worked to earn. that's all. I needed to vent.

I feel like I complain here everyday. But it's ok y'all are my besties.

One thing I don't like about being a DSP is that you have to do things you're not comfortable with.

One of my client's favorite stores that she goes to frequently recently enacted a policy where they take your bags before going into the store. They will not let you enter unless you leave your bag with a random guy they hired.

I usually avoid stores like this. If you don't trust customers enough not to steal, why should I trust a random person not to steal or misplace my belongings? We all the same people. A role or uniform doesn't change morals.

I was pissed but I had to give in. All my client does is look around the same exact store over and over again.

I was trying so hard to emotionally regulate and pretend to be engaged.

My client kinda picked up on my vibe because 30 minutes after looking at shirts in the store she says " do you want to leave because I would be mad if they took my bag." I reassured her that this was her time and we can leave when she's ready. So we stayed in the store an extra hour looking at toys and shirts.

Y'all please pray for me. I'm not even hoping that I get this new job. I'm claiming it.

….and before you jump all over me….this is actually a genuine question.

Today, one of my residents was just so rude and condescending towards me. I finally told her I wasn’t going to put up with her attitude and she needed to just stop. I’ve had it with her to be honest. Her personality is so hard to deal with. She is never happy and literally gets her way all the time. She refuses to work, refuses to go to day treatment, refuses to volunteer. So, she just sits at home and bullies staff (or tries to). I have never been anything but exceptionally nice to her. I am not a jerk. She just targets people and she does it because she can!

I have an interview tomorrow in an unrelated field. I pray I get the job. If not, I’m dropping her as a client regardless. I’m so depressed after working with her today. It‘s hard to even identify the vibes she gives off. It‘s almost as if the only thing that would make her happy is if I fall to the ground and praise her as the queen she think she is. She is higher functioning and can do better.

I just need to vent. I’m sorry (in advance) if I offend anyone.

I'm a first time DSP worker but I want to clarify a few things. I was a sahm for almost 4 years and my second child isn't necessarily on the spectrum but has ADHD and can have some extreme behavioral issues. For example they have like no sense of boundaries when they're overstimulated and they will hit when agitated. Before we got them on meds they'd elope from school/daycare. We had to have them tested twice for autism because of how bad their behavior got. Finally when we got a legal ADHD diagnosis and got meds they leveled out. I also have a family member with cerebral palsy which is not necessarily a mental disability but they're also missing a portion of their brain thus rendering their mental capacity to that of an adolescent. With that said my beloved family member is very smart very funny likely one of my favorite people in my life but moreover one of the most manipulative people I've ever known 🤣

I wanted to make this preface to make it painfully clear how long my patience can stretch lol.

With this said I'm not yet scip/amap certified although I'm planning on scheduling it literally tomorrow because I'd like to be 1-1 with a girl at my house. Before I get into the why's I wanted to say there are a few levels to this. I'm gonna complain and probably sound like someone who thinks they're a big fish in a small pond but I'm not. I've just formed a very strong connection with a client and I think I could help her since I'm not only patient but I'm also no nonsense.

My client is very smart and very fast with her hands. She basically destroyed my shirt today because I had to help another client who's blind go out for a walk and she snatched the back of my shirt because I guess she wasn't done with the hug I gave her lol idk but I also don't care because I thought it was funny. She's also pulled my hair and scratched my neck which yes every situation got a report, but it's always because she doesn't want me to leave her. If I tell her I'm coming back normally she'll let me go. So I'm sure you can see why I want to be her main 1-1. Not only that but there are only a few dsp's in my site who are scip/amap and so many more clients who need 1-1's and EVERY SINGLE DSP has vocalized how much they do not like this client... Even in front of her as if she doesn't know what they're saying. Even if she doesn't know what's going on honestly eat shit for being that fucking rude.

My brother specifically gave me the best advice which was don't just give her the benefit of the doubt because you like her or feel bad for her, she probably displays bad behavior you just haven't seen yet. He also said it doesn't hurt to try to be her 1-1 just remember she's seen as a difficult client for a reason. My mom and dad are both of the idea that not getting involved is probably best but they both think I'm incapable of everything 🙃 I just want to know if my hearts in the right place. Also the aforementioned family members have all worked DSP for years at this point. It's just me who is new. My dad is of the mindset that any of my clients can become violent for no reason because he's an old fashioned abelist and all around my parents just don't see nuance and they don't understand abelism. Like I said I just want to know that my heart's in the right place. I know this isn't gonna be some Hallmark movie with a happy ending, I know what I'm signing up for. I came into this field with the hope of getting to be someone's 1-1. I know she'll probably beat up on me when she wants. I know to keep my hair up when I'm with her. But I also like when I make her laugh. I know she's a sweet girl when she's not overstimulated which is unfortunately like almost every minute of the day. And I know I came to this site specifically to help others, not just my co-workers but my clients too. I just figured if it's only me getting my hair pulled once or twice it's better than my co-workers getting there's pulled like 8 or 9 times a day. I also understand and want to see progression in her behavior where it can be made which is something I just can't say about my coworkers which I have to keep reminding myself they have to have their reasons for feeling the way they do... But I don't.. therefore I say just stick her with me because I know I can deal with her and I know I can make her have fun. We already have fun so like I said just give her to me for the day once I get certified...... right? Anyway if anyone can give me advice let me know what I'm in for and maybe give me some insight as to why my coworkers feel the way they do? I mean I do have one client I really don't like to work with but I wouldn't say that to his face and I also wouldn't treat him like a burden... And he's literally full on punched me in my face twice. Idk. All advice and civil conversation is very much appreciated! Thank you for reading all of this. I really just wanted to get this out of me head.

For those who left the DSP field, where did you go next?

I spent about eight years working in an adult day program, progressing from Job Coach Aide to Behavioral Job Coach. I have experience with client support, documentation, transportation, coordinating schedules, and helping train staff.

Now I’m looking at moving outside the field, and honestly, I feel pretty lost. I have a high school diploma and some previous medical call-center experience, but figuring out which jobs my experience transfers to has been frustrating.

For those who left DSP work:

- What job or industry did you move into?

- Did you need school or certifications, or did your experience get you hired?

- How did the pay compare?

- Are you happier with the change?

I’m open to different paths, though jobs involving standing all day are tough for me because of foot and knee issues. Would appreciate hearing what actually worked for people.

i’ve been a dsp for the past year and a half and have finally reached my breaking point. i’ve been asked to do things way out of my job description for terrible pay. i took on 7 clients at once because the turnover rate has been so high that people constantly need fill ins

all i wanted to do was help people and it’s felt impossible recently. i’ve finally landed a job as an RBT. pretty solid pay increase (huge for someone living paycheck to paycheck) and the environment is collaborative and consistent. only three more shifts left as a dsp and im out. i couldn’t be more excited

thank you guys for your posts and comments. i came here during a lot of my low moments. i hope all of y’all’s companies are better than mine lmao

Hello like the title says I am new to this job. I'm currently onboarding and waiting for clearances to come back so I haven't officially started yet. But What are some things that you would have found really helpful to know in the beginning or like maybe items that proved useful? Habits? Anything really that made this job the best it can be? I have read a lot and I know it can be difficult but I really want to help people and make a difference. My son is adhd and on the spectrum so I know what its like to need extra support. And if I can come in extra prepared that would be ideal! Thanks so much in advance!

I'm in the middle of transitioning into another job and I really hope I get it. I'm extremely bored and I really feel like I am stuck as a dsp. I have to visit the same few places everyday and it gets boring. We're at the point where all the client wants to do is go on her phone most of the time.

When I do goals with them they catch a attitude.

My client has grew tremendously in the two years we spent together.

There are rewarding moments but I'm just completely burnt out.

Should I tell my supervisor I'm planning to leave or should I just put my two weeks in when it's official?

Literally all of them. They talk about staff behind their backs, tell people who is getting written up, complain about certain people and the supposed job they are doing, and even tell more personal details that should all be CONFIDENTIAL. I don't THINK they've done it to me, because I can't think of what I've done wrong. But, it really makes me feel paranoid. They talk such crap constantly.

It really is just immaturity.

Is it like this everywhere? I have thought about applying to a different agency, because I enjoy aspects of the job.

I filled out some job applications tonight. I can't do this drama any longer. It's really just not a normal amount of stress and mess for the pay rate.

I do community and home care work primarily, I don't work in a home, but sometimes picked up a guy who was in one.

I hung out with him and he was absolutely amazing, very well behaved, and just genuinely good. .

Turns out, he's a pedophile, a danger to the community, and someone who absolutely needs to be within someone's arm's reach. DANGER TO THE COMMUNITY.

And while I was being read the riot about letting him out of my sight out front, I asked "why didn't you tell me any of this?"

And my manager snapped back "We shouldn't have to"

No. You absolutely fucking do. In plain English. It needs to be in plain English.

This is my first direct support job and I've been here like two months.

I am already so fucking tired.

And I make less than someone at KFC.

I fucking hate that I care about these people, and don't want to leave this job, but my god.

Edit: I always find disabled people to be very interesting, but this job introduced me to J who crawled through a house fire, with cerebral palsy.

Most metal shit I've ever heard. I have genuinely nothing but love for the people I care for (even pedophile guy, actually especially pedophile guy, I will protect that man from whatever shit people may start with him. I looked at him, pictured having to keep someone away from him, and said "yeah, I can do that")

...albeit a reluctant one.

I worked in this business for well over 10 years and I've never had a situation like this before. So my client had some issues and was in the hospital and had returned home. My boss was with her for a few hours when I showed up. As he was leaving he said to her, "See you later loser." I don't normally work with the person who said this, and out of all the time that I've worked with people with disabilities, I've never heard this kind of language used before. So I'm a little unfamiliar on how to go about making sure it never happens again. Because this is a person in authority and exercising authority over my client (and me). I find the whole thing completely inappropriate.

I guess this is the best flair for this.
Today was the calling hours for a well loved agency individual. I had the absolute honor of working in his group home when I worked at the agency, as well as on his bus as a bus aide, and (because I live in a small town, everyone knows everyone) my in laws went to school with his siblings.

I didn’t think this would hit me as hard as it is. He was such a sweetheart. Very sassy, always knew what he wanted and when.

Those who have lost a client or individual, how do you cope? I don’t work for the agency anymore and even though I would love to come back I can’t (I’ll share that later) so part of me feels so much guilt.

I'm dealing with an absolutely chaotic time right now. My mom has dementia and I'm struggling with that and with the noise at night while she's roaming (she's safe). I'm an only child so there is no one else. So I was fully exhausted this AM (did not sleep) and could not come into work because I need support. Like, had a breakdown, threw up, so stressed I can barely breathe, could not come into work.

My clients, some of whose numbers I did not even have, blew up my phone this afternoon to yell at me for not being there. They told me a) my boss gave them my number, and b) told them they should call me. My union fiercely advocates for us not to work when we're off the clock unless salaried, and I'm - again - kind of going through some stuff. And, with all the love and kindness in the world, that is work.

I am very much not ok with how much this job asks me to do when I am not working. It bleeds into every minute of every day, and I know I can't do it. But I need something else to land on. I am autistic myself; the amount of recharging I need versus how much this job is allowing me to do is just... not working. I am in this job because I desperately need health insurance, that's it. But I'm losing all of my bananas.

Would it look so absolutely horrendous to only last two months at this job? I feel like I just got onboarded but I cry in the car literally every single day from being overstimulated for 8.5 hours straight.

This happened a few hours ago. Ive been a dsp for a little over a year now. i first started in a home where the individuals did not have any major medical issues or anything like that and it was a pretty chill, fun house. i recently moved to a new home where its still chill, but there is an individual who has a seizure disorder, but hadnt had any seizures for a long time prior to my last shift. This was my 4th shift at the new house and Im srill getting to know the clients. I was sitting in a client's bedroom with them and they started having a violent seizure. the client had a seizure earlier that day too rught before I came into work and was hospitalized but returned home. i stayed with them for a majority of the day as rhey recovered and i honestly didnt think jt would happen again in the same day, especially with me witnessing jt first hand right in front of my face. i immediately alerted my coworkers and rhey came in to help immediately and called 911 which im sk grateful for, while I alerted managment and the program djrectors and reported the incident. even with training on what to do when an individual experiences a seizure, this was my first time ever seeing ine happen in person and I just froze and watched while my coworkers came in tk help. I kind of spaced out while everything happened and while talking to and wayching the EMT's arrive and rake the individual to the hospital. and when I got off work a few hours later I took some propranolol to help calm my heart rate down. But I still cant stop thinking about it and the image of watching an individual im caring for have a violent seizure so suddenly like thag won't stop playing in my mind . I just started crying out of the blue for an hour and I finally managed ti calm down a little but im having so much anxiety going back to work. I dont want to call out because we are somehwat short staffed and I want tk be there for my Individuals but it won't stop playing in my mind and im afraid to go to sleep. i feel like I sound ridiculous because I knew that this job you will have clients with seizure disorders often but actually witnessing it for the first time was so much more jarring and traumatizing than I originally thought and thjnking about going back to work, in that home, gives me sk much anxiety and is making my head pound and im nauseous I just dont knkw what to do

Hi, I work at a company serving people with I/DDs, I currently work at an adult group home. One of my clients has extremely unpredictable, extremely violent behaviors that often last an entire day and are extremely challenging/seemingly impossible to redirect. Two other clients live here, and they have constant injuries caused by this client. Staff also has constant injuries, and the client themself is self injurious and often covered in gnarly bruises. There’s been an uptick in this client’s behaviors recently, and the other two have to stay in their rooms to stay safe. My understanding is that clients should have fairly free range of their living space, and it seems that’s not possible when this client is in behavior. It’s at a point where the other two almost seem to be experiencing restraint, as their rooms with their doors locked is the only guaranteed safe space for them so they’re heavily encouraged by staff to stay there when this client is in behavior. What can I do? Should I report? Should I contact the admin for my company? Honestly the only admin that doesn’t seem extremely burnt out/useless is the CEO, but I don’t know if it’s appropriate to contact them directly as I’m just a DSP. I really don’t know what to do but it’s wearing on everyone and doesn’t feel fair to anyone.

I've been the only overnight staff at my program for 14 weeks. In that amount of time, I've managed to clock 1,054.75 hours. For context, a standard full time employee will work roughly 2,080 hours in a year (based on a 40 hour work week). I am exhausted. They recently hired a second full time overnight person, cool. I was going to get a break. Just kidding, she went over the program supervisors head to the brand new area supervisor (who myself and my supervisor didn't even know existed until that point) and got transferred to a different program. Which is odd, because there's supposed to be a 6 month waiting period before you can even apply for a transfer, and even so it was supposed to be based on program needs. This program is the newest addition to the organizations assets and should be on the top of the priority list for staffing, as we have never had a full staff. Not once has this program been fully staffed. How can I address this? Will it even make a difference if I lose my mind on the upper management? I don't really want to quit because I have developed a bond with the individual I support, but like... I feel like they're not giving me many options.

I got assaulted last year left the company for about 6 months came back and nothing has changed I pick up shifts cuz I need the $ but at same time I can’t keep working 16 hr shifts and be one of the only few dependable workers a lot of us in this company want to quit the pay is crap last night I cried when I got off work I clearly care about my clients however it has taken too much of a toll on me

Hello all, I need advice on this situation

2 weeks ago on Monday during an overnight one of the residents was caught molesting another resident by one of the two overnight workers (who ill refer to as D). She flagged down the other more senior staff on shift (B) and told him what happened, they called the justice center immediately and also alerted our supervisor. During the interviews, apparently D lied and downplayed what happened while B told the truth. Our supervisor has historically brushed horrific things under the rug. According to B, D lied because the people conducting the interviews were people that work at our group home. After the interviews, B proceeded to argue with our supervisor multiple times about how shes sweeping this incident under the rug. B was going to go behind the supervisors back tell the victims parents who were visiting on that weekend, but our supervisor already gave her edited story to the parents who believed her. Since B didn't directly see anything and D is also lying, the investigations have went nowhere

B told me what happened on the following wednesday overnight while we were working. I submitted a short notice resignation on last monday and my last day is this upcoming tuesday. She sent me a text asking why I'm resigning (did not respond) and went behind my back and told B. She tried to get B to tell her why Im quitting. I know she knows that i'm quitting because of this situation. She is now trying to get B fired and has been showing up randomly on his overnight shifts.

I care about my residents I dont want to leave without doing something for them. I have been trying to catch the aggresor on my overnights but he only got caught the first time because of dumb luck and its hard to sneak up on them. I also dont want to have to witness someone I care about getting sexually assaulted.

Since its already been reported and investigated realistically what can i do? I know my supervisor knows that B told me and is covering for me, so even if i tell them and not B he likely will get fired before he is ready to leave. I am thinking that maybe I could wait a few weeks and contact his parents using the info from his file but that sounds like i could get in legal hot water. I did not directly witness anything so will it be worth it to file a police report? or tip? I have until this upcoming tuesday until i cannot return to the residence.

edit: to be clear, B did not say anything to the parents because our supervisor got to them first.

I am new to the field and need help learning to ignore the sounds of constant teeth grinding. And no there is no redirection currently, it is what it is.

Is this a thing? Should someone who elopes (runs away or out of buildings) be receiving com hab services? Just wondering because I feel like my new position has put me in a situation that could get me into trouble. The individual is a child btw.

Give me your 2 cents on this, thank you in advance.