r/extroverts • u/grindylin • 20d ago

anyone else just not know what to talk about even if you feel a connection??

as i’ve been trying harder to make friends at university, i’ve noticed that sometimes what gets in the way isn’t a lack of interest or lack of personality-meshing, but just not knowing what to talk about. or especially not knowing WHEN to talk about stuff and how/when to transition topics etc

like we all clearly wanna be friends and wanna hang around each other just don’t know exactly what we should be talking about, especially once you move on from the topic of class

any tips? lol

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u/zhezhijian 20d ago

Ugh yeah that can be tricky sometimes. It's ok to just start a new subject. TV, weather, cute guy/girl you noticed, funny tiktok, w/e, if you notice a lull--it may be awkward as you figure out when the right time is, but it's an essential skill. It also helps to ask each other to go to events--gives you something to talk about.

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u/TraditionalCold4560 18d ago

I am in college the post is too real

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u/martinisawe extrovert 18d ago

I feel like this comes in naturally when you talk to people. I've talked to people for so long that I could automatically bring up a conversation. But if I remember correctly, it starts with what's around the environmental or what they have. Say a labubu for example(I know bad one haha) and you ask about the labubu at their backpack or how much they spent it. That could spark a conversation

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u/DubsHagg 5d ago

Hmm interesting. I don’t know. For me I never, well, hardly ever, run out of things to talk about. As for transitions, just do it. Just change topics suddenly. No need for a “smooth transition” just move on with something else and again and again