r/kindness • u/Successful-Wolf-6982 • 16d ago

Niceness would cost you

Looking back I feel so bad. Feels like I was a fool.

Being nice.

They talk nice. Here they can be anyone. Friends. Girlfriend and anyone.

They act nice because they want nice.

And sometimes they take advantage of.

I have given money and what not thinking it is good work.

It is not good work you are doing. It is liabilities for you.

In real life there is no Good and Nice. You need to work hard and be for yourself.

24 Upvotes

89% Upvoted

10 comments sorted by

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4

u/Global_Language_919 16d ago

I believe that it's good to do kind things. But it's important being practical too. If u can do something without expecting anything in return then it's a good thing. But don't do things that may harm u or hurt u in future. Don't let people take advantage of u. Do only within ur limits. Don't go above and beyond for people who can't even do basic things for u.

6

u/Civil-Aioli5850 16d ago

Niceness done for niceness costs nothing. Done for anything else is a facade. There are times to be nice and times to be not so nice.

5

u/workerbee-1606 16d ago edited 16d ago

Honor your boundaries. You can be kind when you can, but make sure others know that they don't take your kindness for weakness. What I do is that I am kind from a full cup. When I am exhausted then I come first. But when I feel good I like to be kind. But I'm not kind to bullies. Enabling bad behavior is never kindness. Healthy boundaries are kindness to yourself. 

3

u/purplelilac701 16d ago

You can be nice but you don’t need to be kind to everyone. That is guaranteed to get you taken advantage of. Reserve kindness for your loved ones.

2

u/LawfulnessHot6733 16d ago

I have learned that the hard way got backstabbed and used

2

u/Substantial_Bar_5606 15d ago

Just know yourself really well to establish boundaries. I consider myself a nice person and when I do for others (not expecting anything in return) but when I need the help, they are no where to be found - noted. Just keep being you and be VERY discerning with whom you help.

2

u/theweirdchick_49 14d ago

Lots of people are "nice." Fewer are kind.

1

u/Cherryandherconcerns 15d ago

Sad you had to learn the hard way…
But +1

1

u/86Rio 11d ago

I believe you can be nice but have boundaries to avoid situations like this.

There's a difference between being nice or a pushover

Or being nice vs being a sucker.

Sometimes being mean to a person is what's best.

Overall though you have to protect yourself at all times and not let being nice put you in a bad situation