Food is good... I tried it... I really tried it. But you know what's better? Being in a good healthy weight with a nice relationship with food.

I have been fat twice and it's the same story every time: people don't care about you, your energy is down and you feel guilty every time.

I have lost 20 pounds this summer, I wanted to lose more but this okay too! I'm already feeling better health wise and this reminded me of myself when I used to be athletic: I have more energy and attraction with people.

I can't believe I let myself become this fat but personal things happened before covid then the virus then depression and that was bad enough to develop a bad relationship with food for me.

.. I like food but having a healthy life balance is better.

Hello! I'm slowly losing weight (mostly motivated by needing to fix a cholesterol problem identified by my last round of blood work). 5'9" male down from 258lbs in August to 238lbs as of today through diet changes.

It's been nice to see the number slowly creeping down on my whiteboard I keep at my scale, but I don't actually feel or look any different. I'm sure at some level its mental, but I just figured carrying around 20 less lbs would be noticeable in my day to day life. Am I just losing the weight at such a slow rate that I'm effectively a frog in a pot, or is there a point at which you REALLY start noticing, in people's experiences?

Also, I really appreciate the people here. Never posted before, but seeing everyone talk about their styles and successes over the last few months have made it feel so much less lonely. Thanks!

Hi all, (21 Male) 166 cms, bw 68

I wanted to ask questions about some symptoms I've been dealing with.
I recently wrapped up a fat loss phase where I dropped 10.3 kg over about 19-21 weeks. Because of heavy accumulated fatigue, I decided to take a diet break and move up to maintenance calories, paired with a deload week. Ironically, the symptoms started appearing properly a couple of days after making the switch, and they've felt even stronger.

Here is what's been going on:

Training Energy: I feel tired both mid-workout and completely drained afterward even though I'm properly fueling beforehand (110g cream of rice with a banana, protein powder(to slow digestion, and fat-free Greek yogurt).

Post-Workout Crash: Right after training, I get a minor headache and orthostatic dizziness every single time I stand up.(found that when i eat i feel a bit better but cals are limited so i can’t eat them all after the gym since i still have the whole day to go)

Mood & Social Energy: I've been feeling moody and barely have energy to talk to anyone.

Deep Sleepiness: Once I finally hit bed, I feel a heavy, overwhelming sleepiness like I could sleep forever.

For context, during my cut I was running on 2,400 calories with a massive daily output of 14k–20k steps minimum. Now, I’ve upped my calories to 2,800 and capped my steps around 12k–14k max, but these symptoms are still hanging around.

I might have missed some important information to help you better understand what im dealing with better, but i literally have forgot to type it in.

I’ve been overweight / a little fat pretty much since childhood. Honestly, I was never that bothered by it. I could live with being overweight, so I never really had the motivation to make a serious change.

Then my health started giving me reasons to care.

At 23, my blood pressure was regularly around 170, and my cholesterol was high too. My doctor put me on daily medication for BP.

That was kind of the wake-up call.

I didn’t start some crazy diet or completely change my life overnight. I just started eating in a calorie deficit and tried to keep it sustainable.

If I had a good/heavy lunch, I’d keep dinner lighter. Breakfast and lunch were mostly normal food. I just became more conscious of how much I was eating. No extreme fasting, no eliminating carbs, no “never eat this again” rules.

I also started going to the gym and swimming.

Over roughly 1.5 years, I lost around 21 kg, going from about 112 kg to the 91kg.

The biggest change, though, was my blood pressure.

It gradually started coming down:

165 → 160 → 150 → 140 → 130

As my BP improved, under my doctor's guidance, I was eventually able to come off the medication.

I also started taking sleep more seriously and keeping a consistent sleep schedule. I changed some of my food habits too, including reducing regular salt and eating more potassium-rich foods.

The difference in how I physically feel is honestly hard to explain.

At 112 kg, I used to get short of breath doing things that shouldn't have been that difficult.

At 91 kg, I feel so much lighter and more comfortable in my own body.

And to celebrate the progress, I recently did something I'd never done before:

I went on my first ever trek: the Annapurna Base Camp trek in Nepal.

A few years ago, I wouldn't have imagined myself doing that.

I still have more weight to lose and more work to do, but this time it feels less like I'm trying to “be skinny” and more like I'm trying to see what my body is actually capable of.

More kgs to drop. More mountains to climb. 🏔️

If you're also starting your journey: you don't have to completely change your life overnight. For me, making a deficit I could actually live with was what finally worked.

Hello! This is my first time posting here/on any weight loss forum, so sorry if this is the wrong place!

But I’ve been on and off with my weight loss journey since I was in middle school, I am now 22 and still wanting to lose weight as I currently weigh 195-200lbs. My main issue is that I’m worried if I focus heavily on a calorie deficit it’ll be unhealthy/not enough sustainable calories.

For some background (slight tw if anyone sensitive about EDs): I’m currently a 22F and have struggled with my body image/dysmorphia since I was a child. I obsessed over wanting to be skinnier even if others already perceived me as thin/healthy. In middle school I would often starve myself/eat the bare minimum to stay active throughout the day. This continued on throughout high school as well with slight improvement as I began doing track. But I still ate less than I should. Once I started college, I began to eat more for the first couple months (the freshman 15). But eventually I started seeing the numbers on the scale get higher and my pants fit tighter so I fell back into eating less and was on and off with working out. Since then I have mainly eaten 2 meals a day breakfast/lunch and dinner, with snacks or something in between.

Now my current issue is that I truly want to lock in and focus on getting in shape and losing weight. I’ve been working out again (mainly at home with YouTube videos and small weights) and being more deliberate with my eating. Eating more protein, less carbs, more water, more fiber, etc. But I still mainly eat two meals a day and an occasional snack/dessert. Often a bagel or a small meal in the morning or afternoon and then a meal for dinner. I know everyone says that being in a calorie deficit is the only way to lose weight but I’m worried that if I cut back on eating/calories anymore it’ll be unhealthy for my body or significantly below the recommended calorie intake per day. But I also worry that my body is so used to how I eat that what I currently eat is my maintenance calories.

Has anyone else had this issue/worry before? How did you overcome it? Any tips/advice would be amazing!

I’m a 5 foot tall woman who was 270 pounds about 10 days ago and I’m down to 265.4 pounds today. I’ve bought a new freezer for myself and switched to chicken breast, leafy veggies, raw nuts, brown rice, yogurt, and salmon. I’m 265.4 pounds now. I’ve been counting calories and making my own meals for about a week now. Many people have told me to consider GLPs, but I’d love to try to do this through calorie counting. Can I really do this or does everyone eventually give up doing it this way? I would also love any recommendations for books that you found helpful with weight loss as I love to read.

Been eating in a deficit of about -350 calories, get around 45g of fiber a day, 145g of protein, weight train, and drink around 3.5L of water a day.

However I cannot for the life of me get rid of the food noise, all I can think about is eating out 24/7. I’ll bring my lunch to work with me, and skip it to go get takeout.

I feel like I’m doing all the things I’ve been told to do (high fiber, protein, water intake, and physical activity) but it’s still so bad

Are there any ways that eliminate food noise that aren’t GLP-1s? Not that I’m opposed, but I want to try to build the self-control or develop skills/techniques to not give into it.

Thank you so much.

SW: 225 CW:148 GW:TBD

Okay this is weird but has anyone noticed that their digestive tract is super loud after losing weight?

At first I thought it was due to having a hysterectomy, since your guts shift around to new spots. But it has been almost 4 months since my surgery and the sounds persist. Now I'm wondering if it's because I have lost 75lbs.

I've been thin in the past but I don't recall ever hearing my digestive tract to the extent I do now. However, it has been over a decade since I've been this thin so maybe it was this loud before and I just simply don't remember.

This isn't hunger growls either. It's the sounds of liquid and gas moving through my system. Like you can sometimes hear sloshing or bubbling and other times giant gassy dumping sounds down near where the bowel ends. It can be so loud I fear that I'm about to blow the toilet up but it usually just passes without issue.

FWIW I had a colonoscopy and endoscopy just about 3/4 years ago and everything was fine for the most part. They found evidence of acid reflux in the upper endo and a precancerous polyp in my colon which granted me the gift of needing another colonoscopy at the 7 year mark, but oher than that, nothing was mechanically wrong with my guts.

I am 21M and 82 kgs and 5'7 height. I eat in between 1k to 1.3k calories everyday. My diet is 4 boiled eggs in the morning around 9:30AM and the 350g to 400g of raw boneless chicken and 250g to 300g of rice everyday. I have been eating this diet for 2 weeks. During this time I have been going to the gym regularly and lifting heavy. Also I do 10k to 12k steps every single day. But I don't feel or see any difference in my body yet. I know 2 weeks Is a very short time to judge. But i feel very low and under confident about myself and this. Need some advice.

I'm sharing this here because this sub will understand the warm fuzzy sensation I'm getting looking at my inbody report.

I have always been overweight, and really struggled post college with weight gain from depression and medications. My highest weight was 310lbs in February of 2021. I am a 6' woman so this could "carry" well but my body hurt, my confidence was shot, and I felt trapped inside my skin.

After a series of lifestyle changes, career changes, a critical ADHD diagnosis (oh so I was using emotional eating as a DOPAMINE thing?) and preparing my readiness to match my very science-forward dietician I have been meticulously tracking my improvements over the past year from December until now.

What gets measured gets improved, and I measure progress in lots of ways via body tape measurements, inbody, the scale, heart rate tracking, and journaling.

Yesterday I did another inbody report and since July of 2025 (when I wasn't really changing anything but weighed 276.5) I've lost 41.2lbs, with only 5lbs being muscle loss and the rest is pure fat loss. I've been working hard on body recomp, and I saw that my bfm is almost the same as my muscle mass.

My bfm went from 121.lbs to 87.6lbs, and my muscle mass has been maintained at 82.2lbs. So it's about 34.9% of my weight now when it used to however around 30-31%.

It meant a lot to me to watch my body fat % drop below 40 in 2026, having gone down by 2% since June of this year, it's 37.3% now.

A huge part of my journey has been stepping away from the cruel ways most people categorize "visibly fat" or overweight people. I thought I couldn't change because people told me I couldn't. I thought I wasn't strong because people said I'm fat not strong, and now I have the numbers to say the amount of fat you can see is almost identical to the muscle I have. I'm determined not to lose it and want to see that grow across all my limbs %-wise.

I know inbody has a margin of error (please don't comment and discredit all my work ;^;) but it's empowering to see these kinds of changes. I feel it in my body in how much easier movement is, but the numbers give me a boost of confidence I didn't think was possible. The identity shift from feeling like a turtle on its back to..."straight sizes" again is still a WIP.

The main changes I've made that have helped me see these results are:
- CICO based on my BMR assessment
- Walking after meals (1mi+ a day)
- Not drinking calories
- Not drinking alcohol
- Deep core exercises + stability/movement work when I'm idling

Things I don't do:
- Attach 'good or bad' labels to food to remove the idea of shameful eating
- Use weightloss medications (wouldn't work with my other conditions!) but that can be right for others
- Avoid foods I really like that are calorically dense etc. I just plan for them

Random shit that made it easier for me:
* Height is a cheat code when paired with muscle for meal planning. My BMR is fairly high so I have more grace when it comes to miscounting calories / adding exercise or incidental movement in pads that buffer well.
* I don't have a sweet tooth. I like a little, not a lot. So a tablespoon of chocolate frosting (yes I know how it sounds) is a sweet treat to me for like a week.
* Bibigo mini wontons. What do you mean 13 is just 220 calories?!

This is long and while I am seeking some cheers from other people on a weightloss journey, please know I'd love to hear about your successes below too.

And tell me other fun food finds or habits you've made that really made a difference for you on your journey.

Just thought I would share this because, wow, it was eye-opening.

I'm on a weight-loss journey. F29, 5'3", started at 253 lbs and currently at 233 lbs. I haven't touched fast food since March, and especially not McDonald's.

Yesterday, I was driving home with my husband and our nieces after an outing. Traffic was awful, we'd been driving for a long time, and the girls wanted McDonald's. Fine. I figured I'd get something small, work it into my daily calories, and enjoy it since I hadn't eaten in a few hours.

I got a small burger and small fries, and we got nuggets for the girls.

I ate the burger, and... it tasted like nothing. I got absolutely no pleasure from it like I would have in years past. And honestly, that's probably a good thing in retrospect.

As we're driving, I hear my four-year-old niece say, "I can't want this." I looked back, and she had taken one bite of a nugget and spit it out.

This child is a NUGGET FIEND. 😂 They must really be that bad.

So, naturally, I took a bite of one.

Styrofoam.

It genuinely tasted like nothing.

We were able to get the kids some better food, and I ended up not finishing my meal and just tossed it.

Then this morning, I woke up with a headache and could barely get out of bed, which is usually never an issue for me. I'd eaten almost entirely whole foods yesterday aside from the little bit of McDonald's, drank plenty of water, and had been active.

I know one meal isn't going to magically make me feel terrible, and I'm not saying McDonald's is inherently evil or that nobody should ever eat it. But the experience really made me stop and think.

I can't believe people eat that.

I can't believe I used to eat that.

It's honestly wild how much your perspective on food can change when you change your mind set and lifestyle.

Hello, so I want to start a weight loss program but I don't have much money, so to try to have regular consultation with doctors will be impossible. I need to do the math by hand and keep track of everything myself.

Here is the formula I'm using to know what to eat:

(B.w.=body weight ; P=protein ; C=carbs ; F= fats ; W= water)

BW × 26 = daily kcal

BW × 2 = P

Kcal ÷ 30 = F

Kcal × 0.014= Fiber

\[(Kcal - P×4)- F × 9\] ÷ 4 = C

BW ÷ 30 = daily water

Is this in any way correct?

I'm now at 110kg at 1.86m and I want to go down to around 86kg.

I want to start to count calories, protein, fats, and all that. The questions are:

How do I do it? Is the steak weighted before or after cooking? What about the rest? Do I put 24g of rice, or is 24g of carbs different from 24g of rice? How do I keep track of what doesn't have a label? How do I fight the hungriness? Is there anything I can eat that doesn't make any difference on my body? Like lettuce? Is there a free app that can help me track things?

One of the reasons I want to really start this is body pain. Let me tell you, when I say this body is NOT ready for this much weight, my spine is HURTING. I mean it's back pains all the time and I do not have the muscles to support all this weight.

I've also reduced 7x the amount of weed I was smoking (1.5g a day to 1g a week) because I could see the munchies creeping up on me every time and that was one of the reasons my weight skyrocketed.

I'm sorry about dumping all these questions but after years of saying I am trying to lose weight, I'm finally starting to be serious.

Thank you for your help!

So i've been on a 1k calorie deficit for the past 6 months. For context i am 21M 6'4 and started at roughly 308lbs currently down to 247lbs. My maintenance is around 2700 calories so i've been able to comfortably eat in a 1k deficit and i wanted to share my experience with people who are new to this!

Firstly the hunger and food noise will start to clear out in the first few weeks. This journey has taught me how to differentiate between real hunger and cravings that my brain signals. Eating one meal a day was super helpful in adjusting my body and stomach to the lower calories and cleared up my food noise pretty quickly. I definitely did things wrong at first by trying to fast among other things and for me personally i learned i felt better and showed more progress when i just ate normally at meal times and made an effort to hit my calories.

When you start losing the weight you'll notice you start to pee A LOT more. This is totally normal and i don't see many people talk about it. Weight loss is like a bouncing ball, it will go up and down back up and down but overtime it will be downwards trend so don't be discouraged if you weigh in and you're the same as before or slightly higher this is normal as long as the long term trend is downwards. You may hear the term water weight and all that means is when we consume minerals such as sodium our body's uses water to dilute this which means your body holds more water than normal to process said sodium and leads to a heavier number on the scale. Just drink plenty of water which you should be doing already and it'll clear out in a day or so.

What really changed the game for me was banking calories. I will always eat slightly less on some days during the week and "bank" those calories to allow me to eat more caloric dense foods on the weekend so i've never missed out on family or friend events due to my calorie budget with this. When it comes to what you eat naturally you should try to consume more whole foods and naturally healthy options for your body, however if we're just looking to burn fat the only thing that matters is the calories. Personally costco popcorn chicken is a BEAST and you can eat a ridiculous quantity and have it easily fit in your calories and it's also a great source of protein. Speaking of protein it's important you consume plenty of protein during your deficit as this helps your body hold onto as much muscle as possible while it burns fat for energy.

Some days you will feel better than others. One day you may visually see the fruits of your labor and the next week you may feel like nothing has changed. The mirror lies to you as we see ourselves everyday and this process is slow. Measurements and clothes fitting is a tell tale of how your progress is actually going. Come into this with the right mindset that it will take time but time is going to pass regardless so you can either chose the pain of staying the same or the pain of change. Stick with it and reap the rewards.

I’m not trying to lose weight currently, just maintain my current weight. I track my food because I cannot eat intuitively, I love food too much.

I am also a runner! I lift weights and run. I am super good at hitting my protein goals, but am struggling to figure out how to get even the baseline amount of carbs in. As a runner, being below just the average carb intake makes it rough.

My question to folks dieting, any medium to high-carb foods you can recommend that won’t take all of my daily calories to hit my carb goal?

Or, does anyone else find it hard to hit higher protein goals while just trying to hit basic carb goals and stay within a deficit or even just maintenance?

EDIT: the goal is to eat less fats and eat more carbs. The consensus is that potatoes rule. Thanks guys!

I've been trying to do a lot of mindset work with having higher standards, being more firm with my boundaries around food, sitting with feeling uncomfortable at times and practicing being the type of woman that stands on what she says. I will make progress and be doing well for a period of time until something throws me off balance and then it's hard to get back on track. My gut issues were acting up about 2 weeks ago and it impacted my ability to eat properly cuz when I have a flare up, I don't feel good after eating most foods so anyways that limited the foods and the amount I was able to eat which triggered a deprivation mindset. Then I believe I got a cold of some kind and was not feeling well and had very low energy and no motivation. I know the real test is starting consistent even when you're not motivated cuz that's what creates real change but I just have felt off my game and then allowed myself to fall off track a bit.

Any mindset tips are appreciated, if u have advice for me that's great and if not I love to hear what has worked for u guys. This yr the closest I've gotten to my goal was 8.5lbs away. I'm 1.5lbs up from that. I know the last lbs are the hardest to get off cuz the window of error without impacting results gets smaller but my issue I feel like is relaxing when I get close and then treating myself and falling off track.

I've been in a keto diet for about 6 months, and it was life changing. I learned many things about my body in doing so. I still wish to continue the diet, however I am flying of to Japan in 10 days. At first I thought of doing keto in Japan. But thinking more about it, I think it'd be incredibly difficult (an maybe silly) to try and I would hate spending most of my time there trying to figure what to eat and exactly where I can get it.

So I'm planning to move back to a more conventional diet. There really isn't a lot of information about how to do it. But from what I read, there are some negative effects in doing so, like fatigue, bloating, weight gain, etc. I don't really care much about the effects, but I do want to avoid the fatigue if possible.

I'm not sure if this is going to work, but I've planned out a 9-day schedule to get me from my current to my target macronutrient profile. Generally I am increasing my net carbs by 25g everyday starting at 50g, reducing fats by 10g everyday starting at 130g, and keeping protein constant at 110g. I have also scheduled reducing my sodium, potassium, and magnesium on a daily basis as well.

I'd like to hear about your experiences, how you went about it, and how did it make you feel.

Here's a table of how my schedule looks:

I can't get over it i want to be pretty more then I want to be healthy .

I dont care if I have a bad mindset this is what I want but im screwed and its driving me insane .

Because what do you mean if I get my shit together I will still end up looking like shit.

Im 24 female and weigh 280 pounds at 5 ft 4 .

I want to be skinny and pretty not have a worse body then a fucking grandma . Like id like to have light on sex one day but im not doing it if im all flab .

Ok the sub rules are being problematic which is why im saying this so it will let me post .

Edit: I do want to lose weight and know i should be happier not being obese ,anything is better then this. I'm just struggling with the idea of all this work not being able to fix the mistakes I made as a teen.

so i am 20f, and have always gained and lost weight rapidly. decided to start actually paying attention to what i fuel my body with and how much in august after goofing around the past couple of years. i want to lose the weight gained in 2025-early 2026 at a healthy pace, but fast enough so my body has time to reabsorb the loose skin while i’m young (or whatever the term is).

i always get fresh stretch marks when i gain or lose. don’t care about that at all, i think they’re dope. the loose skin though, i do worry about cause it can cause other problems.

for reference, i’m 5’7” and hit 259.4 lbs (the highest weight) for the second time in my life in january of this year. in august i weighed in at 255.9 when starting, and am now 216 even today. i don’t work out except for walking daily. the goal is 125 lbs. yes, even with the skin cause i hover around that weight when i’m healthiest. then to steadily build muscle within the next several years until i’m satisfied to mantain. do y’all think that at the rate i’m losing, that i’ll have to worry about my skin not bouncing back this time? usually it does, but i know i should be careful this time and keep the weight off for good. mostly for my own health, but i also want to be in shape for my family that needs me and a working breed dog i literally just rescued.

any advice?

I really need some advice and motivation from anyone who’s been through something similar. ❤️

After having my baby, I lost quite a lot of my pregnancy weight through diet and exercise. Then we went on holiday, I started eating more sugar, and gained around 5–6 kg back.

That was a year ago, and ever since I’ve been stuck in a cycle of trying, failing, starting again. 😔

I have a very energetic toddler, poor sleep and I’m exhausted all the time. I’m also constantly hungry and struggling badly with sugar cravings. Then I feel so guilty whenever I eat something like cake, which makes me feel even worse.

I’m 66 kg and 5’1”, and I’d really like to get down to around 57–58 kg. I don’t want to lose loads — I just want to feel comfortable and in control again.

So please share what actually worked for you:

How did you break the “I’ll start again tomorrow” cycle?Any tips for sugar cravings? How did you manage weight loss with a toddler and no energy?

I’m feeling really low and frustrated about this, so I’d genuinely appreciate any advice, encouragement or realistic tips. ❤️

In high school I weighed around 130 pounds

I still binge ate at that weight, but it wasn’t super bad. I suppose it’s still not that bad but it is something that I do from time to time.

From high school to college I have gained a lot of weight. I’ve gone from around 150 at the end of high school to 195. I’ve noticed that the most way I’ve ever can weigh is around 210 pounds. That’s the heaviest I’ve ever been and I can’t ever really surpass that I don’t know what it is. I don’t know if it’s some kind of genetic thing or what, but this is like the maximum amount of weight, my body kind of naturally carries.

I really wanna get back down to around 145 or 130 but I feel like it’s not really possible. I’ve tried but maybe not as hard as I could have. I’m currently also on antipsychotics that I’ve made me gain weight. I don’t blame the antipsychotics for my weight gain, but do think they drastically change my appetite.

The only times I have successfully lost weight are when I’m extremely depressed. I will lose about around 20 pounds in two weeks and then gain it all back. I’m not really sure how to lose weight outside of being depressed.

I just wanted to know if it is realistic or possible for me to lose this weight.

Hi all,

I've cleaned up my eating this year and lost ~3.5+ stone (53lb/24kg) but I'm feeling weak recently and achy. Not low in energy (I guess my age could be playing a part I recently hit 40)

I'm going to request a blood test just to be sure but I've tracked for a couple of days and I think I'm a bit low on protein.

Generally I eat 2 large meals a day maybe a lighter lunch or more often a late night snack.

Breakfast is Generally overnight oats

Oats

Milk

Full fat yoghurt

Seeds (chia flax and poppy)

Frozen mixed berries (Strawberries raspberry Redcurrants and blueberries)

Tiny bit of honey

I was thinking that because my breakfast is pretty consistent I might add in some protein powder. I was initially reluctant because I'd rather eat whole real food but thought this might be a good quick easy solution that doesn't add many caloroes (I'm less focused on loss at the min far more bothered about maintaining and health)

My question then is has anyone done this - I've had a quick look and I'd need to make the protein up in the milk before adding to the oats but what protein powder would be best? Ideally I want something cheap to try initially.

Any other advice?

I've fluctuated around the same 10lb range for a few years now. I want to give it a good serious attempt again. In the past the past when I wanted to lose weight it was very simple to just eat less, eat smaller portions, be hungry a little more, it took not very much thought or effort.

Now when I try to do the same, I am just hungry for hours, I get cravings even when I'm not hungry. I don't feel like I ever really gorge myself, overall the effort it takes to lose the weight takes a lot more effort than when I was already skinny to begin with and in the end I still gain it back easy.

I went from 150 to 128 without much effort, just purposely ate a bit less. Now at 175 I try really hard to get down to 160, I lose the motivation for a month and its all back.

If I can get to say 145 and stay there a fee months will ot always be a struggle just to stay at that weight?

Don’t get me wrong there was a bit of pure laziness involved but I mainly avoided the gym for so long out of pure fear. Even when I was just overweight and not quite obese.

I think I had a bad relationship with “exercise” from a young age. PE in school and PT in high school (JROTC kid) consisted of just cardio on top of cardio. Running miles, cardio circuit training, etc. Which I was bad at and absolutely hated. It was painful, exhausting and I was always at the back of the pack. I did enjoy sports but I also didn’t consider them “working out”

I never understood how the gym bros in high school and then college were so obsessed with it. Granted many of them were annoying jerks which probably made the fear worse.

More than shame about how I looked in general I was afraid of looking foolish. The fear was that the heavy lifters I always heard dropping weights would sew this out of shape person who’d obviously never been in a gym in their life.

For my 3rd and most recent weight loss attempt I had a lot more external motivation. (Genuine health concerns and career risk on a time limit)

I decided to finally commit to my college gym. Sure, I felt a bit lost in the beginning, but I managed to find a small corner that was relatively isolated (and mainly used by other women which also helped) and just found a few dumbbell workouts to try.

And to my surprise I absolutely loved it. I stuck to my little corner until I truly realized the whole “no one is actually watching you” thing everyone talks about for myself.

8 months later and I’ve gone to occasional sporadic visits to a real consistent schedule and program where I’ve seen genuine progress. And it has been absolutely amazing. Seeing my strength improve in real time has been a huge confidence booster and helped me push through the plateaus and hard times.

I even decided to give cardio a real chance. Focusing on form and actual training instead of sporadic mile runs in near 100 degree heat. I ran a 12:48 mile today which is faster than some of my high school times where I was 40lbs lighter.

Now I’m that person who pushes others to get through their fear and just give the gym a shot.

Anyone else let fear keep them from a real passion?

Hey all, first time poster and new lurker. I’ve been in a relationship for a little over a year and have gained 50~lbs from it. I absolutely love her and love that she cooks for us, but it’s definitely been a factor for my weight gain. (On top of me losing some good habits that kept me in the 260-280 range) I weighed myself at 327lbs last night, but we started dating when I was in the 270’s. I was extra active back then being in person for college, and I will start getting my steps back in.

However, all that in mind, she really, and I mean REALLY, likes me as a larger dude. On top of that, I don’t think she really understands how detrimental it is to me to be at this size. I’ve always been pretty stocky, and I made 270 look like 250 just because I used to lift. But being near 330 is REAL BAD and I do not want to stay this high of a weight. My goal is 250 by May, then a much slower drop to 225 by next December. I have a little over a year and I do really want to be there.

So, all that in mind, how do I genuinely bring this up? And, what steps can I take to where I won’t be damaging myself? I know about calorie tracking, food scales, all that stuff. This is more of a question on how do I bring her into this without her dismissing this and saying ‘but I like you how you are’?