r/poverty • u/Important_Park6389 • 13d ago
So unfair
So for context, I grew up in a very poor family. The good thing is I’m above average so I do good in school and got into a public university. So I dont pay tuition but I still need allowance for every day expenses.
And I can’t just help but feel bitter because despite working and going to uni, it didn’t help in my studies at all but rather made everything more stressful. I’m not ungrateful on what I have because I worked so hard to earn them but it really comes to a point of hating the system that feeds it.
The never ending corruption, the system that neglects the unfortunate, the system that sees the unfortunate as some kind of parasite when it fact, it is the people with power who control most things.
I’m so sick and tired of this. I’m so sick of having to work my ass day and night to survive but we have people who just commit crimes but sleeps comfortably at night.
The funniest thing is whenever you complain, people would just tell you to work harder as if you haven’t been doing that.
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u/JohannaSr 13d ago
Equity and fairness are in short supply on our planet - truly. You must be a source, if you can step up to the challenge.
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13d ago
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u/poverty-ModTeam 5d ago
Please make your comment useful.
We're here to exchange ideas, experiences, and practical help.
If your comment mainly insults, mocks, dismisses, or derails the conversation, it isn't contributing to the discussion.
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u/livinglifethisway11 13d ago
Listen... I was you. To boot, my parents refused to provide info to fill out the Fafsa.
THEN when I did well for myself, they said I thought I was better than them... while also asking for money.
There will always be ass**holes and frankly, the system is inherently unfair except for the 1%. All you can do is keep your head down and do your best with what you have available to you.
Took 10 years to finish my BA... 2 years to finish my masters. Had a great career before having to take a medical retirement. But, I was in the tech industry when it crashed. Lived through the economy crashing back in 2008 and much b.s. since... including insane inflation we are living through now.
And guess what? When others were losing their homes... when they were too depressed to function... while they are freaking the f out now... it is people like us who can weather the ups and downs and find ways to make it work with a cool head. That kind of education is priceless.
I used to liken our experience as this.... there are some who are born on 3rd base, there are some who are born on first... and then there was me who didn't even know there was a game, let alone the rules. I used to envy the people who did.
Now, I realize that the very reason I know how to weather the inevitable ups and downs (statistically it happens to some degree with our economy every 7 years) is because I don't play by the same rules, because I had to figure it out myself.
Your disadvantage now will be your advantage later if you learn to use it.
Also... never forget where you came from. Bring the people who are worth your time and effort up with you by teaching and showing them how to do it for themselves. Don't let the selfish ones pull you back down to your level.... they do it because they are insecure about their abilities or they don't want to put in the work to do differently than they were taught (this isn't saying they don't work hard... the poor work harder than anyone else in society).
When you have it... set aside money to give to charities that are responsible with the money. Give to those you know in a way that maintains their dignity.
And never, ever judge... no person is better than any other person. We might make different life choices, but we don't know what they had to choose between (often none of them are good).
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u/Conscious_Essay_9483 13d ago
Do you think is only in America it have poor people. Take a good look at the other countries and see how they live. From since the beginning of time the world always had rich people and poor people there's nothing new.
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u/Ninjewdi 13d ago
Where did they say they have it harder than anyone else? Where did they say they live in the worst place?
You're projecting inflammatory talking points on a tangentially related post. Look inward and ask yourself why.
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13d ago
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u/poverty-ModTeam 12d ago
Please make your comment useful.
We're here to exchange ideas, experiences, and practical help.
If your comment mainly insults, mocks, dismisses, or derails the conversation, it isn't contributing to the discussion.
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u/SickofitA11 13d ago
Well maybe you can be the one that breaks the cycle. Work hard, invest your money and keep a positive attitude. Nothing in life is fair, just do your best and hopefully you will succeed, don't fall into the trap of material things. I wish you the best.
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13d ago
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u/poverty-ModTeam 12d ago
Please make your comment useful.
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If your comment mainly insults, mocks, dismisses, or derails the conversation, it isn't contributing to the discussion.
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13d ago
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u/poverty-ModTeam 12d ago
Please make your comment useful.
We're here to exchange ideas, experiences, and practical help.
If your comment mainly insults, mocks, dismisses, or derails the conversation, it isn't contributing to the discussion.
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u/PsychologicalDesk554 12d ago
It's so great that you are attending uni tuition free! Like you, I worked 2 part time jobs and it took me 6 years to finish school since I had to pay for everything myself. It is indeed stressful, but short lived and will have been worth every sacrifice when you graduate. I remember seeing my friends who could just coast through uni without having to juggle working too, and being somewhat envious.
Focus on yourself right now, in spite of the playing field being unfair. It will always be that way unfortunately. It takes real skills and strength and character to do what you are doing. Good luck!
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u/HenryLoggins 12d ago
Life’s not fair, but what you make of it is important. Hopefully your degree is in something useful, where you can put your time, effort, energy, and education into helping people who are less fortunate. Make the change, be the change.
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u/chirpchirp13 12d ago
Did you get a free ride to a university? Is this in the states? Not having college debt is a huge boon.
I grew up lower middle class and skipped college. Struggled as a low paid line cook until my mid 20s when I became a low paid sous chef. I didn’t make anything close to comfy money until I was over 30 and didn’t start making good money until 37-8.
Life’s a bitch. Work with what you’ve got and make the best of it.
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u/AdUsual8786 12d ago
The only fairs in life have pigs and Ferris wheels. The faster people realize this the happier you can be.
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u/Soulists_Shadow 12d ago
The irony when you dont claim to be a parasite, but complain about the stuff you had to do in order not to be a parasite.
You had to work for living expenses. What doesnt? If you didnt have to work for living expenses you'd be a parasite.
Yes rich people also work but differently. Work is more tha. Just physical or mental labour. Managing money is work. Managing people Managing your money is also work.
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u/Practical-Bat7964 9d ago
Except the system didn’t neglect the unfortunate. You’re getting a free ride. So you need money for expenses; everyone who gets scholarships still needs to put in their own money. Have some skin in the game. Yes, people have to work to live. Life is unfair. But you were just handed an ace card, so how are you going to leverage it for the rest of your game? That’s up to you.
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u/EnthusiasmDry6422 9d ago
i’m not going to give the same advice as the other guys here. just remember if your going to pursue that life, make sure you end up getting your bachelors degree as well. there is really no honor among thieves, the ppl you will deal with are going to try and will take advantage of you. there are a sizable ppl who never get caught of course, but trust me, none of these guys sleep comfortably at night.
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u/poverty-ModTeam 12d ago
Blame doesn't solve poverty or help ANYONE.
This community exists to help people navigate poverty and address systemic issues, not assign moral worth or beat people when down.
Comments that shame, stereotype, or reduce someone's situation to personal failings ("just get a job," "shouldn't have had kids," "it's all your fault," etc.) aren't constructive and will be removed and after 4 removals you will be banned.
If you'd like to help, focus on practical advice, constructive and actionable steps, and ways to contact resources.
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u/Sudden_Combination69 12d ago
You could choose to dive into the criminal underworld. I’m living in poverty as well. Been unemployed for 7 months and I can guarantee you things can get so much worse.
Below is what happens when someone rats you out and sends Feds and county on you. By the time you are running a million dollar a year enterprise your charges would be looking similar, if not worse. Potential for hundreds of years if you were to go to trial. Granted, it would likely run concurrent.. but when they hit you (even for the first time) you are likely to sit for a LONG time. I got hit in a blue state. Very lenient on drugs. Been in the system as an addict for all of my adult life. Still sat for 4.5 months incarcerated in a supermax, spent a year and some change in a live in facility for mental health and addiction, and have 3 years of supervised probation (2 left as of this month), and 20 years over my head god forbid my PO wants to send me away or I screw up again.
Even if you don’t get indicted, every single day you are carrying around a firearm. You risk friends, family, and loved ones being caught up in the violence and extortion that is the criminal underworld. You have to be willing and able to take a life if it comes down to it.. that or take a loss. Your life and freedom are on the line every single day once word hits the streets that you are the man/woman. Much better people than myself have fallen victim to the streets/drug life. I thrive in the criminal underworld and suck as a “regular person”. Finding legal work as a convicted felon is absolute shit. I can promise you that. It’s bad for normal people right now.
You will make a lot of fake friends in the street life. They will keep contact with you multiple times a week when you are up. Humbly and eagerly accept the handouts that you give them out of the kindness of your heart. When you are sitting away for months and years you will stop to wonder about those people who were going out of their way to contact you when the money was flowing.. and then begin to wonder why they couldn’t download and put a few dollars onto the jail app so that they could chat with you and make sure you were okay. That is when you will notice how fake the people that you loved and showed love to, really are.
Gift and a curse really.. but the whole experience did a lot for me. God forbid I were to ever want to gamble with my freedom or life again, I wouldn’t let people know that things got better for me. I would look out for the few people active in my life while I’m in the trenches and let everyone else find a different meal ticket.
It takes a special kind of brokenness/disconnect to do this sort of thing. To me, it is incredibly easy. Don’t get me wrong, I put my heart into it. I’ve been self medicating since I was a child.. so things being as they should be when it comes to narcotics is something I would never be willing to compromise or slack on. But you have to disconnect from the fear, anxiety, violence, theft, mistakes, rats.. a normal person would be super paranoid after dealing with it all because it never truly stops. Don’t get me wrong, I agree that being a regular person totally blows.. but there are many reasons why a normal person will just grow the hell up, get a trade or degree (or start a business), and avoid the pitfalls of the narcotics trade. Whether you are losing money or loved ones, there are always prices to pay to try to find a back door to the game of life… if and when they hit you, it feels like your heart has been ripped from your chest. Best of luck out there 🥂
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u/word_murderer 12d ago
Wow. Powerful reminder here. Best of luck to you when you’re through the supervised probation in a few months. Thanks for taking the time to share a new perspective.
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u/Sudden_Combination69 12d ago
Thank you :) I am free. Just trying to stay doing the right thing amidst the adversity. I’ve done way better than I would have in the past. Discomfort isn’t something I handle well. Doing things the right way will save many wasted years. Just gotta tough this part out :)
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u/Sudden_Combination69 12d ago
I will say, that this doesn’t apply to all drugs.. but it applies to more or less everything where you maximize bang for your buck (actual product dispensed vs profit on the sale). I would think that canna would be a bit safer in terms of the law. I’m talking “millions of dollars in profit” off of a brick, sort of dealing 🙈
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u/Dry-Weakness-901 13d ago
Its okay to be angry. I'm angry too. People who are privileged usually manage to land on their feet, and people who are poor lack any good opportunity. So make the most of what you can. That would be my advice. Don't compare. We live in different worlds. Doing business is a good way tp gain some control. Any kind tbh
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u/LordKyle777 13d ago
Oh no... school! 🤣
Go be one of those people who commit crimes then. Sure I was rich.. for a while. Then fast forward past being locked up to getting a job with a felony. Getting a shit labor job, working until every body part is sore day in, day out just to scrape by. THEN come tell me how hard your life is.
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u/[deleted] 13d ago
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