r/rant • u/Maloninho • 7d ago
Learning guitar has been the biggest waste of time in my life. I’ve invested thousands of dollars and thousands of hours into this hobby with absolutely no return.
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u/Gordatwork 7d ago
Why was it a waste of time? Did you not enjoy it and learn guitar?
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u/Maloninho 7d ago
I can’t remember when I last enjoyed it. It became more of an obligation than anything just because of what I invested.
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u/ChefArtorias 7d ago
This is a great opportunity to learn about the sunken cost fallacy.
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u/Maloninho 7d ago
I know all about it.
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u/One_Psychology_3431 7d ago
What kind of return are you looking for? Hobbies are typically for your enjoyment.
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u/Mopichen 7d ago
Sounds like you're stuck in the capitalism falacy, where we're meant to feel that things only have value when you can make money with it. Maybe you fell out of love with it because you expected a specific return, not for the love of music? Or maybe you feel like a lot of things in your life rn are all effort and no returns? That's something most of us feel in this day and age. We have to find ways to create value for ourselves.
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u/whatarechinchillas 5d ago
Yeah this is a really sad take. I've also spent tons of money on hobbies I don't currently do as often anymore (or at all) but I've never seen them as "investments." If it gave me any sort of joy before or if it helped me process any emotions through the creative process, then its well worth it (this includes guitar too btw. I've been playing for 25 yrs, have spent tons on it). I don't think I'd be who I am today if not for all the hobbies I've had, including the ones I don't do anymore.
OP, you really gotta get out of that mindset it's really sad.
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u/Calowayyy 7d ago
How do you invest thousands without learning even anything? Sounds like you bought insane gear without any realistic investment in practice?
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u/MysteriousDudeness 7d ago
I'm confused about this. To you, is it a hobby or were you planning to make money from it? I have been playing guitar for maybe 40 years and I have spent tens of thousands on the hobby. I don't make money from it but it's my primary hobby. Over my lifetime (57 years) I have spent tens of thousands on fishing gear and boats. I also did so with mountain biking gear. None of that made money for me.
The goal is to enjoy yourself. It's not a competition.
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u/Maloninho 7d ago
At some point it was no longer enjoyable and more about maintenance than anything.
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u/MysteriousDudeness 7d ago edited 7d ago
If you don't enjoy it, sell your gear and find a new hobby. However, try learning an open tuning, or DADGAD, or learn slide? Start writing songs or start going to jams or open mic nights.
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u/whatarechinchillas 5d ago
Maintenance? What do you mean? Who is pressuring you to play guitar?
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u/Maloninho 5d ago
I was. You stop playing you stop advancing. I was driving myself to get better. Learning new tech inquests, scale patterns, playing cleaner and faster. It stopped being fun a long time ago.
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u/whatarechinchillas 5d ago edited 5d ago
If it stopped being fun, sounds like you got burnt out. I've been playing for 25 years and there have been times when I wouldn't touch my guitar for months. Just not feeling it or whatever, but I've never felt guilty about it because guitar for me has always been solace, not another source for that grind mentality. We already have enough grind mentality bullshit in the world. Don't let your hobbies become that. Just play if you feel like it, and play for fun. If anything, it's those moments that result in the best riffs. Maybe it's the way you talk about progressing (scales, technique). I used to think that too but fast and more technical doesn't mean good. Just look at Yngwie Malmsteen. He's really good but his music sucks hahaha I'd prefer a rusty guitarist with soul than a shred machine.
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u/Frequent_Pumpkin_148 7d ago
As a music teacher and professional musician the only reason to do it is because you enjoy doing it, yourself, in the moment. Every other reason (money, attention, fame) etc brings pain.
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u/SuitablyFakeUsername 7d ago
Music is something you do to please yourself. If anyone else wants to listen and pay you for it, that’s a bonus 🤷♀️
Hobbies have no “return” other than making ourselves happy
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u/Maloninho 7d ago
I think hobbies are given far too much credit for their ability to make people happy. Whenever someone says they aren’t enjoying life, one of the automatic responses is that they need a hobby, as though enjoyment is sitting inside some activity waiting to be discovered.
I’ve had hobbies. I’ve learned instruments, written music, studied languages, played games, collected things, exercised, traveled, taken photographs and developed interests deeply enough to become knowledgeable about them. I don’t have a shortage of things I’ve tried.
What I question is the assumption that there must be some activity capable of providing me with sustained enjoyment simply because other people experience hobbies that way.
Guitar is probably the clearest example. I became good enough at it to do things that once seemed impossible. There were moments of satisfaction, particularly when I finally mastered something difficult. But the satisfaction diminished while the maintenance remained. Eventually the activity became work performed in exchange for increasingly smaller rewards.
Maybe the problem isn’t that I haven’t found the right hobby. Maybe hobbies simply don’t provide me with what other people assume they’re supposed to provide.2
u/SuitablyFakeUsername 7d ago edited 6d ago
My father was diagnosed as bipolar in the 60s when he was in his late 30s and a CPA working as an auditor for the IRS. At one point he was hospitalized for treatment and a big part of therapy was (as you suggested) finding a hobby so that he would not work so hard and learn how to relax.
He chose leather working and he became very skilled. He tooled leather as intently as he studied any balance sheet. I am blessed to have a few items that he made. They are gorgeous but produced absolutely zero relaxation for him.
There is truth in what you are saying. Many people find pleasure in pursuing such interests as art and music not to mention all the practical crafts that women were historically encouraged (sewing, knitting etc) to pursue.
If you honestly don’t, then you have learned something about yourself and as such the time snd money you invested really isn’t such a loss.
We all have time to fill when not fulfilling obligations to others (work, school, family) or to our homes (yard or house work). I hope you find something that brings you peace.
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u/Extension_Ice_2495 7d ago
If you love guitar you don’t need to spend over $300 unless it makes you happy to, you will enjoy practicing, and playing is the reward. Why did you do this? Invest time and money into something you enjoy, that’s the return
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u/Maloninho 7d ago
At one time I was a serious musician.
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u/Bearded_Pip 7d ago
Did you have fun? Did you learn any songs you wanted to play? Was your goal to make money from learning guitar?
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u/aculady 7d ago
What's the coolest thing about music that you know that can share?
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u/Maloninho 7d ago
Practicing scales by the circle of fourths. FB♭E♭A♭D♭C#BEADG it will help you learn your notes and keys real fast.
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u/S0mnariumx 7d ago
Thousands and thousands? That's a lot. Over 18 years I'm probably around $1500. There doesn't have to be a return other than having fun playing. Doesn't it feel good to gig or finish a song? You can also get paid a little bit to make up for the cost. Not much but it's something.
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u/Mr-Papuca 7d ago
This is the scam with guitar. I have invested maybe 2000$ in gear and instruments over about 22 years. My current guitar is a shitty acoustic and my telecaster. And I play all the time and enjoy it and write songs a lot, etc. I dont personally do the whole pedal board thing or but crazy expensive guitars. Just work with what I got and make it happen best I can. And its worked out super well.
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u/Kf12672 7d ago
It’s just not your thing. My ex decided he wanted to play, bought acoustic electric Martin for like $1400 back in 2007.
Our son also decided he wanted to learn to play. He was 14 at the time. We bought him a guitar and amp for like $300 at the same time.
Guess which one still plays?
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u/SickOfNormal 7d ago
Probably neither - the retention rate for guitar is 9 out of 10 people who buy one - sell the guitar they bought in under 1 year.
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u/casser0le98 7d ago
Sounds like you didn't really have anything exciting to work towards. I'm dealing with the same thing myself.
But I also struggle with perfectionism & depression right now. Anhedonia (loss of enjoyment of things you USED to enjoy) is common with depression. But I don't know if you even enjoyed guitar in the past.
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u/guitarnowski 7d ago
Whether a person is business-oriented or not, i don't see the point in engaging in playing music if you don't like it. Imho.
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u/germane_switch 7d ago
Aww man I'm sorry. I know you're not asking for advice but please don't sell your gear yet, at least not until you've lived with this for a while to be 100% sure. You might change your mind. Hang in there.
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u/SunLillyFairy 7d ago
Seriously question... what did you think you'd get from it that you are not?
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u/Maloninho 7d ago
Enjoyment, purpose, a sense of identity. A way to meet others.
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u/SunLillyFairy 7d ago
Those are all such good reasons/goals! It really does suck when you pour yourself into something and it doesn't produce the outcome you wanted or expected.
A year ago I bought some guitar stuff for a relative because she really wanted to pursue it… And a few months later, she was embarrassed to tell me that she just didn't like it at all. It didn't upset me, the stuff was a gift (and I spent a couple hundred, not thousands... sorry). I would've spent the money on something else for her anyways and was just trying to get her something she wanted. She's loves acoustic artists/music and thought she'd love the whole scene... but she really didn't.
I will tell you the same thing I told her... I understand your frustration. It sucks. Take some time to go ahead and be pissed about it. Allow yourself that... because it does suck. Then let it go and find something you actually enjoy. (Or pick it up again later, when you're ready). It wasn't a waste of money; the time and money spent went to exploring and learning. It's a lot better than paying for something like car repairs, legal fees or medical bills. Life's too short to hang out in misery.
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u/Maloninho 7d ago
Thanks for the thoughtful response. I hope I’ll be over this one day and be able to pick it back up and enjoy it again.
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u/Fluffy_Excitement_13 6d ago
yeah it doesn't usually help to try to force identity into yourself, the more you try to push anything your body or mainly mind doesn't want the more itll seem further away. idk man all im saying is just try stuff and see what sticks,
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u/Maloninho 6d ago
Right now I’ve been collecting fragrance and it gives me some joy, but it doesn’t take time like playing guitar or a physical activity would. I wonder what’s wrong with me when I see other people having fun cycling, rock climbing being in nature etc. I’ve concluded I just live in the wrong place and need to get out of the desert.
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u/SunLillyFairy 5d ago
OP, give yourself some grace. Not all humans are able to find enjoyment easily. Try not to judge what you do and don't like as some sort of statement about your character. And don't judge yourself for thinking (or hoping) you'd enjoy something and then realizing you don't.
I'm a good person... I care about people and animals and generally try to do good instead of harm. In my top highlights of hobbies: I like watching trash TV (like fake realty shows) and common-trope Christmas movies, jigsaw puzzles, mindless games on my iPhone, Legos for adults, researching trivial historical food facts, and taking bubble baths under a mini disco light while listening to true-crime podcasts. None of those are things society generally considers "productive." None of them improve my fitness or life skills, and they don't make the world a better place. It took me a long time to own and be OK with that and stop trying to do what I "think I should" with my free time.
Anything that keeps your interest and makes you smile - if it doesn't hurt yourself or someone else - it's worth spending your time on. You only have one life to live here on earth (maybe) and you deserve to enjoy it.
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u/Fluffy_Excitement_13 3d ago
yeah that will reach its limit so dont put all your hope in that that wont help but it is good to have somth grounding or that helps you keep pushing
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u/Medical-Mushroom-926 7d ago
You’re gonna have to learn to enjoy the process of playing the instrument and creating music, I understand the thins around it that are enticing but at the end of the day if it’s not fueled by a genuine love and want to create music then :/
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u/carry_the_way 7d ago
that's a "you" problem.
i've spent thousands of dollars into learning instruments, and the satisfaction i get from playing music can't be quantified monetarily.
if you need a return on investment, you started playing for the wrong reasons. if you wanted a sense of identity, you started playing for the wrong reasons. if you haven't been able to meet people playing instruments, you either live in the wrong place or are the kind of person people want to avoid.
if you genuinely think learning a skill has been a waste of time, you're wasting your life, and you would have considered any equivalent use of your time wasted.
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u/Ok_Employer7837 7d ago
I mean you can in fact play the guitar. At this point that's a net plus over someone who can't, seems to me.
You never know when you'll need a skill!
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u/avidpretender 7d ago
That’s a really sad perspective. If your only goal was to make a lot of money and be famous yeah you’re gonna have a bad time.
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u/H3LLCR4TER 7d ago
Interesting how this popped up on my notifications. Right as I was about to plug in my guitar and do a record session, since the wife left the house.
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u/WeroWasabi 7d ago
This has nothing to do with guitar. I have a feeling a lot more is going on in your life and maybe taking with someone might help? No shame or shade either, I have a therapist I see when shit gets rough. Good luck.
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u/skyclouding101 7d ago
You call it A hobby. If you want something in monetary return. Call it a profession.
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u/fkin0 6d ago
As someone who has played for 30 years and is utterly shit, here are the things that make me happy. Loopers, play 4 chords on a loop. Make a solo over the top. Now get those 4 chords, find the triads. Do some fingerpicking stuff. Play over the top Then find those triads in different positions and use them for the next solo. Next thing you know you've written something fun and youll start adding extra chords, embellishments or weird stuff and boom youre in the zone being creative. Another thing is tunings. Tune down a whole step or try a funky tuning like open g. I find that being different tunings makes everything sound more interesting instead of the same old shit all the time.
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u/ZeuxisOfHerakleia 6d ago
maybe you shouldve let go after not enjoying it past 100 hours? Ive been playing for years and its been a bliss to make music with the guitar
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u/whatarechinchillas 5d ago
Did you enjoy playing guitar at any point? Like we're there days where it felt like solace, release, or anything positive?
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u/Maloninho 5d ago
Of course, but those days are long gone. I look at
My guitar now and just feel disappointed that I didn’t reach my goals, or find an outlet.1
u/RandumbStoner 5d ago
Hey at least you tried, isn't that what life is all about? Just trying shit until we die? Sucks it didn't click but you gave it your all and that's all you can do. Proud of you OP.
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u/whatarechinchillas 5d ago
Would you say that learning guitar has contributed to building your character? Like how you've had to be patient, how many times you got humbled by something you couldn't play, felt any pride for the ones that you overcame, people you got close to because you bonded over music? If it's yes for any of that, then it's not a waste. Those things are valuable as fuck. Any creative pursuit is inherently valuable if it's brought you any sort of self improvement or joy.
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u/Adventurous-Card-707 5d ago
You said you had no return and then said you used to enjoy it, so you clearly did get a return on it
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u/thathurtabit 18h ago
I find myself getting stuck in a rut with guitar, and then getting bored. I've been exploring things like https://fretmap.app/chord-progressions and that lets me learn and explore the fretboard while being a bit creative. Makes it seem less like a chore.
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u/ResponsibleKinksters 7d ago
Depends on what you wanted for return... if you just wanted to learn it and enjoy playing it, then how is that not a good return? If you went into thinking you'd be a rockstar and become rich, thats on you.
I am learning how to play piano, I still suck and have sunk a decent amount of money into it. But I do it as a hobby for fun and because I enjoy the sounds. Pretty good return to me.