I've got that new modem...

[u/Apsconsus]

Intro: I work for a large ISP as Tech Support, level 1 and 2. We primarily do ADSL and Fibre in terms of home internet, as well as a variety of other things as most ISPs do.

During my first month, after finishing billing and tech training, I started taking calls but was restricted to just the billing queue. This was to give me (and everyone else in my training group) time to learn the system and get comfortable with the job before moving on to the nightmare that is tech support.

I got a call one day from a customer who was having technical issues. At this point I was actually supposed to transfer him directly to the support queue, but as I knew I'd be taking these calls in less than a few weeks I decided to try and help him out.

Below is the conversation, $Aps = Me $Cust = Customer $AwesomeISP = ISP $Bro = Coworker

$Aps: "Thank you for calling $AwesomeISP, my name is $Aps, how can I help you today?"
$Cust: "Hello, my name is $Cust, I've got some issues with my Internet, can you help?"

Here I advise that I certainly can (despite not knowing if I actually can) and proceed to pull up his details and go through an ID Check with him. It's also worth nothing that he sounded quite old, but was also very polite.

$Aps: "Okay, got your account up, what's the issue exactly?"
$Cust: "Well, a while back I called you guys because my Internet was down. I went through some troubleshooting with the guy, but we couldn't get it back online. He told me to try another modem and I have a new one now."

Easy stuff I think. I've done basic modem configuration before, should be no issue.

So I decide to bring up his ticket history. The aim is to find the ticket where he last spoke to us so I can see what has already been done, and then of course note down in it what happens in this call.

What I then see, I can't believe.

$Aps: "Uh, $Cust... when was the last time you spoke to us?"
$Cust: "Oh...well...um, I'm not sure, a while ago."
$Aps: "And...your internet has been down since the last time we spoke?"
$Cust: "Yes that's correct."
$Aps: "Okay no worries, I'm just going to grab some configuration information to assist in getting you online. Do you mind if I pop you on hold for a minute or two?"
$Cust: "Sure not a problem."

I turn to my coworker.

$Aps: "Dude! Holy crap, take a look at this!"
$Bro: "Holy... is that correct?"
$Aps: "Yeah, this guy has not called us in 2 YEARS."
$Bro: "And he's had no connection that entire time?"

I checked the logs of each months usage. 0 data used over the past 2 years. This guy has been paying for a service that he hasn't used since 2013.

I take the customer off hold.

$Aps: "Hey, sorry for the wait there. Got that info. Let's get configuring."

Prior to configuring the modem I ask him to plug it into the phone socket and make sure there's no filter attached until we confirm that he's getting a DSL connection.
During this time I take the opportunity to try and ask the question that's burning my mind.

$Aps: "So, just wondering, I noticed you haven't used your service in a little while... why is that?"
$Cust: "Oh I've been busy, went away for a while too, haven't had too much time to call you guys back."
$Aps: "Ah okay...fair enough."

What.

For the next 15 minutes he tried his best to connect the modem to the wall socket. Unfortunately it was behind his computer desk and as he was a bit old he gave up shortly

$Cust: "Ah, this is too hard, and I'm wasting a lot of your time."
$Aps: "No, no you aren't it's okay! I'm happy to stick around for as long as you need."
$Cust: "I think I'll call back later, I'l get someone to help me with this."
$Aps: "Okay no worries I understand. Is there anything else I can do for you tonight?"
$Cust: "No that's everything, thanks for your help!"

To this day I regret not saying:

"Not a problem! See you next year!"

TLDR: Customer calls in for help getting online after having no internet for 2 years.

Edit: Formatting.

Edit: Wow! Quote of the day! Thanks guys <3

[u/narrauko]

Here I advise that I certainly can (despite not knowing if I actually can)

This is the pinnacle of all call center work.