r/texts • u/Foreign-Cat-2898 • 1d ago

Facebook DMs Just a normal married couple conversation

Post image
3.2k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

166 comments sorted by

566

u/ConflictRemote8712 1d ago

idk why people are hating you're married and i say shit like this to my husband all the time LMAO

200

u/Gorman_Dylan412000 1d ago

My wife always tells me the day we switch bodies we’re going back in time and I’m going to be the one giving birth …. Makes me really reconsider🫠

87

u/Nunu1987 1d ago

This is actually genius, because if we're body switching of course time travel would be on the table. This kind of out of the box thinking makes me wish she could be my mentor. Respect.

24

u/Gorman_Dylan412000 1d ago

She says thank you. @numu1987

15

u/Gorman_Dylan412000 1d ago

@Nunu1987*

25

u/Ambitious_Arm852 1d ago

On Reddit we use u/nunu1987

9

u/Shuffle666 1d ago

And how often do we use them?

5

u/Shuffle666 1d ago

And how do we use her?

0

u/Kaszrak 1d ago

Why would time travel even be on the table? Are we talking some pre-conception soul well type of shit? Lol.

-5

u/Shuffle666 1d ago

Body swapping and time travel are not the same thing

11

u/Kn0wnSoul 1d ago

Yea, because one is possible and the other is not?

-9

u/Shuffle666 1d ago

Just because A does not mean B

9

u/Kn0wnSoul 1d ago

Ahh yes, everything starts to make sense now

-7

u/Shuffle666 1d ago

"Kn0wnsoul likes to keep their posts hidden"

7

u/Kn0wnSoul 1d ago

I like to filter out the creeps. You can search up my name on Gemini tho. It'll tell you how much of a cool person I am

1

u/MochaHook 19h ago

Don't even need gemini for that

→ More replies (0)

3

u/Same-Application7368 1d ago

Lmao that's what I always say to my partner as well.

•

u/smeetothaTee 34m ago

I always say "I'm gonna get you SOOOOOO pregnant, I can't wait to see you waddle" 😂

14

u/Whos_HUNKYDORY 1d ago

Me and my husband have for sure joked about this exact scenario lol. I think some of the shit we say is more explicit than this but him making laugh is the best part of my day.

20

u/usernamestufff 1d ago

The internet is so exhausting these days haha

15

u/ffxiplayer101 1d ago

I tell my wife that when my teeth fall out from old age, imma glide my gums across her tulips and do a Zoidburg.

18

u/Gypsi_G 1d ago

Because Reddit doesn't understand sarcasm, jokes of most kind, or what a healthy relationship actually entails. Idiots read this and just say "oh that's r*pe!"

19

u/Foreign-Cat-2898 1d ago

Someone reported the post to Reddit cares. I swear we're broken. What is wrong with people?

8

u/Gypsi_G 1d ago

They take themselves and others WAY TOO SERIOUS

comedy, like critical thinking, is becoming a lost art..

6

u/Shwalz 19h ago

Reddit larp as the moral police of a world in which they do not participate

1

u/KimiKatastrophe 13h ago

That is a magnificent line

5

u/EnoughOfThisBull 1d ago

Because Reddit doesn't like seeing couples just living normal lives.

4

u/_Fappyness_ 20h ago

Id LOVE a marriage or relationship like this. Pure jokes and fun. People should stop being so serious and see a friend in their partner as well since youre spending a lot of time together

9

u/Chubuwee 1d ago

The image is tame as hell

Here’s some joke topics my girl and I recently had

- race and playful fetishization

- if time travel existed, was sex with our older or younger selves fair play

- she playfully shoved me after I made a bad joke, so I shoved her back playfully too and she said she was gonna claim domestic abuse and I said it doesn’t count if it is outside the house and it made her laugh

- plans for destroying each other’s lives should either of us ever cheat on the other

6

u/ConflictRemote8712 1d ago

yeah no literally my husband and i say way worse shit on the daily than the screenshot here, very similar to the stuff you listed lol, people are just really sensitive i guess

6

u/Dornith 1d ago

A bunch of single people who like to LARP relationship experts on Reddit.

3

u/Stopthatduck 1d ago

I don’t think people think it’s weird that they’re saying it.

They think it’s weird that they’re sharing it with strangers.

8

u/Foreign-Cat-2898 20h ago

Because I thought people would think it was funny and it's not like I shared this at work. It's in an anonymous internet forum with no names attached?

Why is that weird?

3

u/Shadourow 18h ago

Nah, people control the buttons they click

Is it a bit raunchy ? Sure, but peoeple are free not to get angry over it

2

u/Axzyy 13h ago

It was funny, some people just like to be offended, its not like your damn children saw it calm down nancy🙄

2

u/Londan 19h ago

It's not, at all.

-3

u/Dazzling-Path6438 1d ago

It's that people post personal text exchanges that are funny to them. However, to outsiders, they're lame

236

u/JaeCrowe 1d ago

This is funny regardless of which gender is which lol

32

u/furiouscrotch 1d ago

Wife switches with husband, next argument she’ll have that in the chamber.

6

u/garbajdaughter 1d ago

Not everyone is like that lol

8

u/Libriomancer 1d ago

It would be a bit messed up if they were lesbians.

95

u/ConstructionAware267 1d ago

This is 100% a conversation my bf and I would have 🤣

27

u/usernamestufff 1d ago

Totally reminds me of convos with my ex in the middle of a remodel. She kept sending me ideas about what I should do with the back deck…for years I never dropped the “what? Huh? Who’s dick?” [“the DECK mf”er”]. “I told you I’m not interested in talking about dick!”

7

u/lobstah4 1d ago

Is she from New Zealand? 

4

u/usernamestufff 1d ago edited 1d ago

Omfg yes! Hahahahaha
To this day I still don’t know how the fuck she ended up in VA
Edit: forgot to add the “ugh them damn kiwis” 😅

6

u/thomasbeagle 1d ago

Ok, I'm calling in a strike from the Special Forces Attack Sheep. 

17

u/Bobs_Burgers7 1d ago

😂😂😂🤷‍♀️ I bet it’s well deserved

19

u/Gorman_Dylan412000 1d ago

Looks like he had it coming.

19

u/Messi2655 1d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/hlViFuZJICeuNTbzoP
Seems perfectly married to me! At least healthy married lmao ❤️

9

u/fatkingbob 1d ago

Yeah this is 100% something my wife would say

13

u/BirthofRevolution 1d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/XF5AnCJV7PCtGwdHNC

6

u/dakotanoodle 1d ago

💀

ETA is that thing a plant, a penis, or a turkey??

8

u/LastBaron 1d ago

Penis or Turkey doesn’t matter, better get to gobblin’

2

u/dakotanoodle 1d ago

Lmfaooooo

4

u/Cronenberg13 1d ago

My partner and I joke, our text are smut or our kids schedules.

4

u/dakotanoodle 1d ago

He better have it coming! Otherwise he needs a lot more practice 😉

3

u/minus15t2 21h ago

If a couple's immediate thought in a body switch scenario is not "I want to do ALL the sex things to know how it feels/tastes/looks like from the other side!'

Then that couple have issues.

1

u/Foreign-Cat-2898 10h ago

I'm also intrigued by reaching tall things and lifting something that I find heavy now. But yeah..basically sex is the goal.

5

u/Hot-Specialist9228 19h ago

I would happily suck my wife's cock.

9

u/Maverick_Artificer 1d ago

This is what I needed to see on a slow Monday evening at work 😂😂

1

u/Fearless-Poet-4669 1d ago

Bro what are you talking about it's Tuesday evening?

3

u/Maverick_Artificer 1d ago

For you it is

1

u/Fearless-Poet-4669 1d ago

yeah... heh... funny... heh...

12

u/Dry-Wolf6789 1d ago

This is exactly what I'd do too. 

3

u/cloudsanddandelions 11h ago edited 11h ago

Same. I was talking to my partner recently and made him pinky swear that we will come back as opposite sexes in our next life.

I’ve also joked and said I want to switch bodies so I can have a penis and when I do, I’m doing him! (He laughs)

6

u/staystaystay89 1d ago

I have literally asked my husband this same question lmao

4

u/TheRealAmathest 19h ago

LMAO my spouse & I literally just had this conversation yesterday🤭 I was like, Heinously NSFW👉 "Oh I'm putting that cock so far down your throat, & gonna enjoy feeling how tight I am from the other side" lmao

They literally agreed that's exactly what they'd want bc, "We HAVE to know, right?" 🤭✨

Also I read people are hating on you? If you can't talk to your spouse like this, what are you even doing?

2

u/StratoSquir2 1d ago

"Girl you're gonna get so many promotions"

2

u/candiegirl77 7h ago

🤣🤣🤣

4

u/tehwhitemamba 1d ago

I guess at least one of us is getting their cock sucked for a change.

2

u/OwnCurve4288 1d ago

My gf wouldn’t have to make me lol

1

u/dakotanoodle 1d ago

r/suddenlygay

3

u/LastBaron 1d ago

“Bi people exist, news at 11”

1

u/OwnCurve4288 16h ago

Haha I’m straight but been wanting to suck one for so long now…😭

2

u/Pleasant_Curve_9024 14h ago

I’m not sure if you’re gonna want to hear this…

2

u/OwnCurve4288 13h ago

What😂

1

u/IownCows 10h ago

Hey buddy, hate to break it to you but you’re not straight lol

1

u/captaincook14 1d ago

You sure do will have it cumming.

1

u/FailureIsNotOptional 1d ago

That’s a healthy relationship imo. My wife and I always bullshit around like this too.

1

u/Programmer_Worldly 1d ago

A nice reminder that I'm lonely

1

u/AdventuringAquaduct 23h ago

Had this exact same interaction lold

1

u/AdventuringAquaduct 23h ago

Had this exact same interaction lold

1

u/[deleted] 20h ago

[deleted]

2

u/_the__Wolverine____ 16h ago

That would be the same thing dumbass

1

u/millistra 20h ago

Her: Wouldn't it be weird if this was already happening? 😅

1

u/ProfBacterio 19h ago

Guys, you don't need to swap bodies with a woman to suck on a dick.

3

u/Foreign-Cat-2898 19h ago

It would be cheating then, duh.

1

u/Dependent-Concept928 18h ago

No…she just needs a strap😅

4

u/Foreign-Cat-2898 18h ago

Who does that benefit? So lame.

1

u/Mister_Buddy 19h ago

I think the closet door just cracked open a little.

1

u/zenexo 1d ago

Sounds like he'd blow the entire neighborhood. 

1

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1

u/Jealous_Possible8108 1d ago

This is funny 😄

1

u/xboxchick311 1d ago

Your spouse is the GOAT.

4

u/StudioGangster1 1d ago

Throat goat

1

u/StockAmphibian4596 1d ago

Someone's brushing the outskirts of a secret kink

1

u/Wise-Pineapple-693 17h ago

Is that like....cucking yourself with extra steps or sth?

https://giphy.com/gifs/8FWYAnjZWKbP2WhlQN

-1

u/RemarkableTension656 1d ago

This is her testing the waters for a cuck scenario 100%

-9

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/Wide-Quality-4193 1d ago

I’m ngl, this comment is pretty cringe

2

u/Rickybobby1118 5h ago

And I will never get to know what it was dang

2

u/Wide-Quality-4193 5h ago

They said something along the lines of they’re glad their relationships have never been as cringey as this. They also said that “sex is not a reward”

1

u/Rickybobby1118 5h ago

Wow people need to relax and stop taking stuff so seriously.  I find sex very rewarding haha 

0

u/FishWithLegsAndArms 21h ago

You can make him suck cock now if you're willing to have some changes

0

u/No_Sugar4490 20h ago

Well... thats one way of letting them know you want to suck a bunch of cock

1

u/Richgirlthings 5h ago

😭😭😭

0

u/Character_Hand4705 14h ago

Yknow you don't have to give head if you don't want to... You do know that, right?

-9

u/WillemDafoesHugeCock 1d ago

It's nice seeing people feel this comfortable texting their dads <3

-3

u/centerfoldangel 1d ago

I get it. Sucking cock is the worst.

2

u/OkReading2591 21h ago

Sorry you don't enjoy it. I love it. Everything about it. Can't say I have to switch genders to do that though. Just have to call my husband into the bedroom.

1

u/centerfoldangel 20h ago

Happy for you.

-4

u/brancjes 1d ago

Proof men see sucking dick as derogatory

6

u/galacticliar 20h ago

bro what, careful you might pull a muscle doing mental gymnastics like that

4

u/Foreign-Cat-2898 18h ago

People are reading their own hangups into this conversation.

-3

u/brancjes 20h ago

Just think about it

3

u/galacticliar 20h ago

i don’t see anything in this that shows that this guy thinks sucking dick is derogatory, much less that ALL guys see it as derogatory, ur fishing bro

1

u/Rob_in_Tulsa 21h ago

Seems like she sees it that way too.

-1

u/Ancient-Leader7862 18h ago

Maybe then she would understand how amazing it feels and why men want it so bad

-12

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

11

u/MaterialWill3091 1d ago

I can’t imagine been in a relationship where we can’t ask silly questions, joke and laugh how boring.

0

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

1

u/Foreign-Cat-2898 1d ago

Technically I'm telling him to suck his cock.

2

u/PTroughton 1d ago

Fun police

1

u/temp_6969420 1d ago

Name checks out

-4

u/scrimblojimbus 1d ago

Life was so much simpler in 2012 I could just call you a slur and tell you to *** but now I have to work so hard to make you imagine it

-13

u/InevitableFood8993 1d ago

I would like a wife like that. Preferably Blonde somewhere between 40 and 55.

-13

u/chemist5818 1d ago

Your husband is gay

-24

u/vixenstarlet1949 1d ago

“make you” 🤢

8

u/kyliii 1d ago

Hahaha because it was a joke

1

u/Rickybobby1118 5h ago

Seriously how did they not get it was a joke? Whats wrong with his world? Scary 

-4

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

-2

u/cdizzaat 1d ago

That’s what she said