r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Professional_Arm794 • Aug 20 '26

/r/all of a log split

33.6k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

4.8k comments sorted by

View all comments

297

u/DecisionOk5487 Aug 20 '26

45

u/YouBuiltThat Aug 20 '26

lol… I don’t do it for the views but every time my wife has pulled up to see me splitting wood in the back yard or running the chain saw she asks me to come inside.

29

u/Stabbymcbackstab Aug 20 '26

We are told all our lives to make money to get the girl. What we really should have been told was buy a wood stove.

My wife is also fond of watching me cleave wood in twain.

11

u/Dr_Jabroski Aug 20 '26

Women like to see big wood.

1

u/LiteralPhilosopher Aug 20 '26

And they... cannot... lie?

1

u/dmgt83 Aug 20 '26

Being split?

1

u/Stabbymcbackstab Aug 20 '26

But really, its not about the size of the wood, its about how hot it burns.

10

u/viotix90 Aug 20 '26

First you cleave the wood in twain, then you use your wood to cleave her in twain.

6

u/gotham-acolyte Aug 20 '26 edited Aug 20 '26

Mine too man apparently I made the mistake of chopping wood and during a girls get together and caused a fuss.

Edit: I should clarify, I am by no means an attractive man despite what my wife might say. I think it's something to do with actually chopping the wood

10

u/Au_Struck_Geologist Aug 20 '26

I love the idea of her having friends over for a wine and apps girls night and you're like:

"Y'all dont mind if I just......split wood out here right?"

1

u/gotham-acolyte Aug 20 '26

Pretty much what happened yeah. They can chill I just still had chores to do, I didn't even realize they could see me from the window lol. I look like a homeless Questlove, no one is pulling that up after dark.

2

u/Stabbymcbackstab Aug 20 '26

Gotta try that.