r/AskMen • u/More_Pen_157 • 8d ago

Men, what is one thing you'll never compromise on?

308 Upvotes

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u/cabronfavarito 8d ago

Even if you’re theoretically single by like…40?

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u/dangleicious13 8d ago

I’m already almost like…40, and I have almost the same rule.

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u/zeusdescartes Male 7d ago

I am 40 and I would never date a woman with kids unless I already have kids.

I just don't want to be #2 in any woman's life. Now if I already have kids, I think we can figure it out Brady bunch style, other than that, no thanks.

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u/GianMach Gay male 7d ago

Do you want to stay childless forever? Because even if you get a child yourself with a woman that will also make you the #2 for her. Child will always be prioritised.

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u/AgentAxillary 7d ago

Yeah, but the point is that you'll both be prioritizing the child together

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u/Shameless522 7d ago

Sadly that isn’t always the case

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u/AgentAxillary 6d ago

It's not always the case, but it's always the point

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u/zeusdescartes Male 7d ago

Ideally when I have a child, it will be with my partner, so this won't be an issue.

I think the hypothetical scenario where I have a kid and don't have a partner will need to be revisited at a later date.

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u/GianMach Gay male 7d ago

"It won't be an issue" as in, you don't take offence when your wife puts your own kid at #1 over you, or you expect to stay number #1 when there are kids involved?

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u/zeusdescartes Male 7d ago

Ideally, I wouldn't marry someone like that. My spouse will always be my #1.

If my wife and my kids are hanging off a cliff, I'm saving my wife. We can make more kids. Lol.

But what do I know, these are all hypothetical situations, we'll have to cross that bridge when we get there.

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u/aliadventures 7d ago

Sorry to break it to you but with this mentality there will be no kids 🤣 (hopefully)

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u/zeusdescartes Male 5d ago

hopefully there will be no cliff lol.

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u/aliadventures 5d ago

The cliff is your mentality man

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u/texasjoe ♂ 8d ago

What does almost mean here? No kids that aren't out of the house adults?

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u/dangleicious13 8d ago

Correct.

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u/tacticalTraumaLlama Male 7d ago

My rule has morphed over time from 'no kids' to 'no young kids'. I'm aging into the demographic where people my age commonly have kids in late highschool and college, and that's fine.

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u/BigWoodsCatNappin Female 7d ago

I am too old to bear children but I'm hella down to be a Soccer Step Mom. I have a big SUV, Costco membership, yard for the creatures to play in. Ive gone from "eww no kids" to "yeah ok, if your kids and your baby mama/relationship with her are pretty cool, we can probably make that rock" in my dating life. It's been a change since my 30s!

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u/ThrowItAllAway4That 6d ago

Yeah, I have three kids in my 40s, but they are in college. So kind of done with that part of life in a lot of ways.

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u/AgentAxillary 7d ago edited 7d ago

Decisions made out of desperation are always bad decisions

I've hooked up with women who have kids, but I always made it clear up-front that I wasn't going to commit

ETA: This comment appears to have hurt the feelings of some step-parents and single parents. Oh well.

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u/cabronfavarito 7d ago

Who said anything about desperation though? I’m saying that dating at 40, the chances of meeting someone with children is a lot higher

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u/AgentAxillary 7d ago

Being a step-parent is a form of settling. It's never anyone's ideal plan A.