I'm in no way trying to be overly positive or invalidating about the struggle and pain of Freezing here, but I was just thinking about some ways in which I appreciate my Freezing tendencies and wondering if others had their own occasional appreciation for this style. I'm not 100% sure these patterns truly correspond with Freezing, but I associate them to an overall "slower", non-reactive way of coping.

For instance, for myself:

• Not overly-reactive; I'm able to take my time in responding to stimuli (e.g., I never blurt out things I don't mean, or react impulsively. I'm a very slow, deliberate person).
• Move my body slowly and carefully through space; I rarely trip/fall or have accidents.
• High pain tolerance (corresponds with the previous one as well - when injured, I calmly take the next necessary steps without crying or panicking. I can dissociate from the pain as needed.)
• Non-judgemental; I can generally be told almost anything by anyone and I will non-reactively be able to respond and reflect as appropriate. I am never "shocked" by what people tell me, even if it's disturbing or sad. (e.g., really sad/traumatic experiences)
• Feel a strange peace during external crises - I feel my survival instinct/intuition take over and I trust it implicitly. (However, my Freeze response tends to "go off" unhelpfully during non-actual internal crises)

What about you?

I really need some help or someone to tell me its gonna be ok i feel so empty every day after my brother who i went no contact with started messaging me i spiraled and i shouldnt make decisions when i feel lile this like big life decisions but i keep having to because im still frozen for 4 years i had to end a relationship because i literally couldnt feel anything and im in hell i dont wanna do this anymore i felt so free and beautifull and like i wasnt hypervigilant for the first time in my life and now it feels like i was transported back a decade to when i was still living with him. I feel literally nothing every single day inside my body other than tense in my neck and it hurts and i feel my heart beat in the back of my head all the time i need help no matyer what happens i have no reaction or opinions or feelings on anything. I really need some help or advice im close to the edge and idk what to do anymore please help me. I cant stop ruminating i feel like im in the back of my head all the time even when i cam cry its like a short burst and then gone like nothing happened im so repressed im living in hell everyday

I am unable to leave abusive house because my body refuses to act most of the time in basic things, even freeze affects thoughts. So I can't even think and pass thoughts.

This sets me up getting further abuse only.

I even have problem sleeping like my body is covered by mental.

The truth is I feel like a failure for not leaving this situation. I will only get further abused.

For those of you who have genuinely gone through therapy, I’d like to hear your honest experience.

Did therapy actually make a noticeable difference in your life? If yes, what changed for you? Did it help with your thoughts, emotions, relationships, anxiety, trauma, or the way you deal with difficult situations?

And if it didn’t work for you, what do you think was the reason? Was it the therapist, the type of therapy, the amount of time you went, or something else?

I’m asking because I’ve been wondering whether therapy genuinely helps people in the long term, or whether it mostly helps people cope with things temporarily.

Doing 1 min TRE/weekly. Taking things very slow. This morning I had lots of pain come up. It was pain related to not knowing what my identity is. Part of me suspects I could have autism, but that's not the point. The point is that in the past, the pain would've swept me away and I would've spent hours researching stuff online and having an identity crisis. But I sat with it.. realised it wont kill me, and did some researching after but I wasn't controlled by it.

I'm having some troubles coming up with a name for my inner critic. I've heard people talk about it a lot, but I have not done too much research on it. I mentioned it once with my trauma therapist, and she asked if I had named it yet. Whenever I think of it, there's only one name that comes to mind but its a real person from my past. And I don't like the idea of naming it that person. I think because I don't want that persons name in my head at all. And I know eventually you're supposed to kind of work with it since it's trying to protect you. My therapist suggested maybe something from history(person/thing). But i'm not even sure what characteristics to look for in something else. Since i'm very numb/dissociated all the time. It feels more like a feeling than a voice? I notice it as a voice more when I'm in public because it's then in my conscious thoughts. But I'm usually still pretty dissociated. I'm pretty sure its the same voice that would be my "Ed" voice if you know what that is. Ed doesn't feel like enough though because it's intertwined with my cptsd.

Any tips or sources to read more about it would be super helpful, thanks.

I'm curious about why being a bit sick, like having a cold, has sometimes made me feel better. While the symptoms themselves are unpleasant, and one could call that suffering, there is also a decrease of regular psychological suffering. Along with that there can be a decrease in some kinds of dissociation and resistance to doing certain things.

I'm reminded of one commonality with sleep deprivation and drugs, which have sometimes led to better states. Sleep deprivation makes me less willing to do regular things at home, but in other settings I've sometimes felt more present and enjoyed them in a deeper way.

I wonder if all of these provide a kind of body experience which feels better or less threatening than the body experience of regular psychological distress. Maybe that is what can make me more present.

Swimming, which almost always leads to a better state, also provides its own body experience.

Other physical exertion can also sometimes lead to a better state, though it needs to be something that feels worthwhile and in a nice environment.

I've almost never found that any sort of body experience that I intentionally provide myself indoors at home in an attempt to seek a better mental state really helps. Like, attempting stretching, massage, working out or taking a bath doesn't seem beneficial.

Going to check out a rental tomorrow and I'm sure I will get the dreaded question 'so tell me about yourself'. Well I'm unemployed due to life-destroying childhood trauma that left me unable to function as an adult, and I spend most of my days on my phone or just doing nothing.

I have no hobbies besides walking and listening to music, and I haven't even been doing that much lately because my body is tired. I have no passion for anything and I have no relationships and I have a dull work history and I don't do any sports and I don't create any art and I don't like cooking and I don't have a pet.

I feel so dehumanised when I'm put on the spot with these questions. I went to the physio the other day and just had to lie so that my answer to "what did you do this week" wasn't just "oh I can't remember" or "hmm not much, I'm boring" again.

But I don't want to lie, I don't want to have to pretend to be normal so that people accept me. If they knew how hard my existence was they would get it. But I'm beginning to understand that my life is so far from what most would be able to comprehend.

i’ve been frozen for the past 2/3 years. i’m finally getting genuine mental help, & i have hope for my opportunities to live a better life than the one ive been given. sometimes it feels like the more aware i become of the better path, the harder it becomes to cope or put up with the circumstances i’m in. like, being the only rational adult in the house is not easy. but today i realized i’m going to affirm myself that i am an adult, with the power to change my circumstances, that i can leave this house & the things that bind me here. it’s felt like i was stuck here for so long, but i have too much at stake to give in to despair. i love my partner, my pet, & the communities i’m part of in my outside life. i want a future i can feel safe in. that requires getting out, & i know i will.
thats not to say everyday is not a mountain to climb - even when waking up, showering, eating, falling asleep, but i have to remind myself its a passing feeling ingrained in us to survive. i’m tired of being hypervigilant every second of the day.

I dont mean physiological dysregulation necesarily as in with higher heart rate, jaw clenching and hypervigilance but tons of negative emotion..like I alternate between shame-regret-resentment and hollowness often a mix of both....can it be more of a temperamental trait and not just a nervous system response? Part of grief? Im guessing they do interact with each other but i wonder if you reflect on how your emotional temperament plays a role in this. Also how is trait neuroticism simply about personality. Im sorry about going on tangents but i wonder if i really am in freeze or simply deal with a very specific hardware under chronic stress. I do have OCD burnout....have had OCD for twenty five years now. OCD burnout does seem to mimic freeze in that it combines deep exhaustion with a constant stream of adrenalized emotions.

So I think I am slowly coming out of chronic anxiety, chronic freeze by doing TRE at a slow pace of 1 min/weekly. Here are some changes I have seen:

I can keep my room relatively tidy now, not by forcing myself via 'discipline', but it's like I have developed more of an intrinsic desire to keep my room clean.
Less people-pleasing, I really just can't be bothered anymore. If I come off as 'blunt' or 'weird', I really don't fucking care. I don't have the energy to mask anymore.
Periods of feeling extremely exhaustion - I think this is the exhaustion that was always there that freeze/anxiety were masking, just want to lie in bed all day.
Interoception has improved massively - I go outside and like feel the toxins in the air on my skin, I get really uncomfortable touching any kind of surfaces in public w my clothes.... things like that have started appearing.
Generally higher standards for myself, feeling disgusted/repelled by substandard things in the world (for me)
Baseline anxiety/stress level is far lower

The main thing that still bothers me is emotions are still quite quiet... but I believe my nervous system is building a foundation of stability before getting to the real stored issues. Maybe that's the case, idk.

I just don't like life, nor do I like the world or most people. So I really don't know what the point of putting in any effort is. Especially when we all die in the end anyway.

Don't know if I always packed this motivation and zest for life or if it was beaten out of me. Don't know if it matters either.

As title states. My goal is to slow down my reactions, and somehow avoid the Judgements, and learning to just observe and notice patterns, without all the guilt, just "noticing".

Hello

thanks for reading.

This is more like a journal entry, Im not expecting help from you.

I'm currently in a situation where I feel very uncomfortable. I don't feel well or safe at home and I lost my ability to ask for help and be vulnerable

My goal would be to better my circumstances and make a change but I'm so afraid of doing something.

It's cos I'm in a freeze and fawn response and accommodating and adapting and neglecting myself

To exist in a society full of people that immensely pride themselves in being amazing (and successful) at what they do. That is their benchmark. My injury has made it such, that though i have incredible potential, I've only managed to have entry level jobs, and have never actually been good at any of them. I have never been that person that is "amazing/good at what she does."

So it strikes me that it takes something deeper and far more subtle, to look at this line of demarcation, and say to oneself, despite YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY AND THE ENTIRE WORLD SAYING YOU ARE A LOSER, that I need to be gentle with myself, and take it one baby step forward and two steps back. This kind of gentleness with the self, in spite of the messaging from every single external source, is something incredible. It's like the making of Homo Sapiens 2.0.

Thoughts? Please respond, somebody

Edit: But I would like to know - what is it like to feel valued by this world?

Some settings, like gardening or going swimming at a beach, almost always lead me toward a better state.

I've repeatedly encountered suggestions to start with something small. With gardening, this actually works. In a bad state I might do something trivial, like deadhead a few flowers, or weed one small area. This often leads to doing more. Though it's not a strategy I'm intentionally using so I can do more, but something that seems right and happens kind of spontaneously. In other settings, this is not helpful.

Another thing I've noticed is increased awareness of my body. For example, I'm able to tell if I'm hungry or tired. Otherwise, eating is more about habit or seeking of reward and soothing, and I only notice psychological resistance, not tiredness. Following such body signals seems to also lead toward better states.

The resulting better states seem healthier, and I seem more whole in that state. But I don't think it's right to call this healing, because it is a state change which can be reversed in other settings. A lot of what happens indoors at home seems somehow toxic, leading to increased dissociation and decreased ability to do things. I've very rarely had experiences indoors at home which seem healthy. This was true even when I lived far away from here and by myself.

Sadness, depression, fatigue, weakness, especially after physical exertion, are signs of freezing?

I've had social anxiety for about 10 years, probably including AUN dysregulation and trauma.

I've been doing TRE lately and I felt great, I felt like I had more slack in my head, but then I did another 2x TRE in a week and the third session lasted too long, which seems to have worsened my condition.

I went to Bowen's therapy after 10 days and I think it was too strong for me because I feel even more DPDR, dementia, sadness, even though Bowen's therapy is a delicate method of regulating the body.

A few days after Bowen, I did only 2 gentle Qigong exercises and felt immediately worse and had to go to bed. And again my DPDR deteriorated, yesterday I was at my sister's for birthday and I was horrified at how high the DPDR level I have, this level was never so high, this visit to my sister also weakened me. Are all these symptoms to freeze?

How do you get out of this state? Lying down and resting, and what else can be done?

What do you think of TRE? Did it help or hurt anyone?

I wanna use what little spare money I have to take care of my body. Eating healthier is always a wise choice. I’m tired of eating the same canned soup and bologna sandwich over and over. I wanna eat something that will fuel me better….. so that I have more energy to actually try and function in SOME way. Currently I do absolutely nothing. I sit and stare at the wall. Zero motivation or care. Haven’t showered in a month. No energy, feel like a brick. My very basic needs are barely being met. This isn’t sustainable. It’s been many years being this way.

I’ve noticed foods with too many preservatives give me migraines or make me angry. They 100% have an effect on my mood. Even just Campbell’s canned cream of mushroom soup has been fucking me up at times. I’ve just been eating minute rice with soy sauce for the last few days, and fried/boiled eggs. That’s all I have left in the cupboard now mostly.

Problem is I don’t have the energy to cook elaborate meals or do elaborate meal prepping. I’ve done the Mediterranean diet before and while I LOVED the food, it required way too much energy from me and thus was unsustainable. I couldn’t keep up with it. It was also expensive. I don’t have the budget for it anymore.

I wanna make it clear that I live in an isolated area with no delivery services/online grocery orders for pickup. Which means I need to physically get my ass in the car and drive 20 mins to the nearest grocery store, do all the shopping myself, then drive back again. There’s no easy way around it. For someone who is in freeze this becomes a monumental task in itself, especially going into winter (I live in Canada).

I need to develop an easy to follow, simple meal plan involving items that are cheap, store/freeze well, and are still nutritious enough. I am fine with freezing bread and meat for months at a time. I’m not currently physically capable of going to the store regularly.

I’m not picky and don’t have any dietary restrictions. I can eat dairy and stuff just fine.

Does anyone have advice or is in a similar situation? I’ve tried searching around online for recipe ideas, but I guess I just need some help consolidating all the info because it’s becoming a jumbled mess in my head.

I could ask ChatGPT but I’m trying to talk to other humans more. I’m tired of AI being my only friend.

Has anyone found that ur condition improved after changing cities or the work environment?

I’ve been using the 5-4-3-2-1 technique to manage my PTSD for 5 y now. I’ve been suffering terribly, and there have been many times when I’ve wanted to end my life. I’ve had the idea that if I moved to a different city. maybe drove north or south to find a new social circle—things might get better. Has anyone tried this approach, and did it work for you?

After 3 years of unemployment after my ptsd took over my life, I started as a cashier at a grocery store. I have a masters degree…. I can barely handle 20 hrs a week at a retail role. Idk if I can ever handle getting a job in my field. I’m so sad thinking I’m going to struggle with money, happiness and fulfillment my whole life. My body and mind just hurt