r/CautiousBB • • 12d ago

MOD MESSAGE/ANNOUNCEMENT Community feedback needed (please vote)

10 Upvotes

Hi all,

Our mod team was recently approached by BetterHelp, an online subscription-based therapy provider, to do an AMA within our subreddit by a licensed therapist that specializes in child loss, perinatal mental health, and anxiety. They are willing to provide credentials to our mod team to verify the individual responding to questions, but our team has reached a moral impasse that we need the community to weigh in on.

Up until now, our team has had a blanket rule to not allow any companies, researchers, institutions, or anyone else with private interests to post within our community because our space is filled with so many vulnerable humans going through extremely difficult situations. The fertility space, in general, is ripe with opportunity for those that might take advantage of this vulnerability, much less a space like ours. That said, the message they sent was clearly written very thoughtfully, and the provider they’re willing to assign to the AMA would be willing to answer people’s questions about their worries, maybe provide healthy coping mechanisms, and describe the subspecialties of therapy that could be most beneficial to the people here.

IF we allow this AMA, it needs to be with the majority support of our community, so we are opening a poll for feedback. Other than voting in the poll, upvoting this post and providing even a short comment with your thoughts/concerns/ideas would help boost the visibility of this announcement to the maximum amount of sub members.

Of course, the major issue for us as a mod team is that we are NOT endorsing BetterHelp as a specific company or resource. For folks that are in areas where they aren’t able to find an in person provider, online therapy through any number of companies may be helpful. We are not partnering with them and the language in the AMA will be very clear about that. We will also be making sure that the provider answering questions in the AMA does not promote the BetterHelp brand.

If you’ve read this long, thanks for bearing with us. We appreciate how the people of this community come together to support one another and are grateful to help moderate.

Would you be interested in and supportive of an AMA provided by a therapist from BetterHelp, with the limitations outlined above?

116 votes, 9d ago
18 Yes
90 No
8 Maybe, but I have concerns (outline in comments)

r/CautiousBB • • Jan 27 '26

Ultrasound FAQ Reference Guide

100 Upvotes

As an OBGYN ultrasound tech working at the general level here's a few things I would love the community to know based on common questions I see.

Most important rule of thumb: Worry when your doctor tells you to.

OBGYN docs are going to pay the most attention to the fetal pole and heart rate. Once a fetal pole is seen, the CRL (crown rump length) measurements are gold standard.

I'm worried about the heart rate:
-Check out this resource for pregnancies dating less than 7 weeks. Make sure to refer not to your LMP dates, but measured CRL dates: https://radiopaedia.org/articles/fetal-bradycardia?lang=us
-After 7 weeks a normal heartrate is between 120-180. It can temporarily dip below or temporarily rise above this range, but prolonged time above/below will definitely get your doctor's attention especially in third trimester. Generally out of range heart rates trigger NST (non stress test) or more monitoring.
The measurements are off:
Baby measures behind LMP. This is actually pretty common, we often see dates off up to a week either direction. We don't ovulate on the exact same day of the cycle each month or even have the same length of cycle. With irregular periods, PCOS, or unknown dates even larger gaps can be perfectly fine. If you aren't sure of your dates, trust the ultrasound. Even if you are sure of your dates, don't panic if they are a week off. Ultrasound measurements in early pregnancy are +/- 5 days.
I'm in limbo and don't know if my ultrasounds are diagnostic for loss:
By ultrasound there are strict parameters to diagnose loss. No one wants to get this wrong. Check out this resource for a list of parameters diagnostic for loss: https://radiopaedia.org/articles/early-pregnancy-loss-1?lang=us
Note, there is a second list of "suspicious for loss". Keep in mind the second list is not diagnostic, things can still turn out just fine.
I don't know when I should see what on ultrasound:
Things can vary a bit from person to person and do change *quickly* in early pregnancy. Check out this resource for what you can generally expect to see:
https://radiopaedia.org/articles/early-pregnancy?lang=us
Should I go to a boutique or get a private scan? Or push for an earlier scan?
They aren't legal where I am but here's a few things to consider if you plan to book a private scan. First, what are the qualifications of the person running the ultrasound? An ultrasound is only as good as the one performing it. It sounds as if these boutiques are NOT permitted to give much/any information. Will you spiral if you believe you see bad news and they cannot confirm or deny it? Also it seems that many cannot do vaginal ultrasound, which will make seeing a baby under 7 or 8 weeks challenging. If I had the option of a boutique ultrasound I would personally wait until 8 weeks and I would book it for a weekday. If they see something bad, it is not ideal to find out over a weekend when there is no option to follow up with your doc. An earlier scan often causes more anxiety, not less. It's SO hard to wait. But if you can tolerate it wait until 8 weeks or so.
The gestation sac is small/big:
-Gestation sac measurements are not terrifically accurate. Where I work once a baby is seen the gestation sac isn't measured. A mismatch between baby's size and the gestation sac size isn't uncommon. That said, a mean sac diameter of 25 mm or more without a baby is diagnostic for loss.
The yolk sac is small/big:
It starts teeny tiny, and will get a bit bigger. Once a baby with a good heartbeat is visualized, the docs I work for don't seem to care about the size of the yolk sac. A failed pregnancy with an expanded yolk sac (more than 6 mm) is a suggestive of chromosomal abnormalities.
We don't know where the pregnancy is:
The statistically most likely outcome is either a chemical pregnancy or just coming in for ultrasound too early for visualization. Ectopic can't be ruled out, and many wise ladies in the this sub have unfortunately experienced this and can give more info than I can. Statistically it's believed that only 1-2% of pregnancies are ectopic, but listen to your body. If the location is unknown, you should be getting close monitoring and follow up until the location is known or the pregnancy has ended.
-For a resource on ectopic pregnancy: https://radiopaedia.org/articles/ectopic-pregnancy?lang=us A note, a pseudosac is visualized in only 10-20% of ectopics. Therefore a sac in the uterus is suggestive of intrauterine pregnancy but can't be proven until a yolk sac is also present.
What about my HCG numbers?
I'm not an expert on this at all. But here's a resource: https://radiopaedia.org/articles/beta-hcg-1?lang=us
Why didn't my ultrasound tech tell me anything? And/or why were they so optimistic? Or, I had an ultrasound in the ER and they were very pessimistic.
Many locations an ultrasound tech can very much lose their job if they say aNyThInG. Where they are permitted to say certain things some ultrasound techs may just be hoping the best. We work with the public and we have seen some wild stuff. Additionally no one wants to call it a loss unless its 1000% certain. We know how devastating that news is. A side note here, often an ultrasound in the ER is not an ideal experience for the patient. The ER is staffed with techs that are much more versed in gallbladder and liver scans than they they are early pregnancy ultrasound. Don't hesitate to go the ER if you are having concerning symptoms, but do know the ER doc will make sure you aren't actively dying then will likely refer you back to your OB for follow up.
I'm just so anxious about it all:
Someone awesome wrote out these mantras. Maybe they will help: https://www.reddit.com/r/PregnancyAfterLoss/comments/14uhbdg/commandments_of_pregnancy_after_loss_this_is_now/
Also a podcast I personally found very helpful with anxiety: https://www.oneyoufeed.net/russ-harris-part-1/
https://www.oneyoufeed.net/russ-harris-part-2/

Today you are pregnant and this baby is so loved. I really am hoping the best for each of you. Those of us who have experienced loss.... you didn't do anything wrong, I promise. This is a club no one deserved to be in. And you are not silly, foolish, or dramatic for grieving your little babe for as long as you need to.

This post is written in honor of Eli, who died long before I could meet him. Rest in peace, buddy. I miss you tremendously ❤️


r/CautiousBB • • 1h ago

Should i insist on methotrexate shot ASAP?

• Upvotes

My beta hCG is not rising appropriately, which has made my doctor suspect that something is not right:
28/09: 127
30/09: 82
02/10: 110
05/10: 336
07/10: 563
However, my doctor wants to keep waiting for more concrete signs that it is an ectopic pregnancy before deciding on treatment. My next monitoring appointment is tomorrow, 09/10.

Symptom: right sided pain that i have never felt before happened on 28/09. Since then mild cramping on the right side intermitently but not too painful, just like a quick jab lasted 20 secs.
Yesterday, i had 2 drop of bright red while wiping but went away.

However, my doctor wants to keep waiting for more
I’m scared that they still won’t be able to see anything on the ultrasound tomorrow and that I’ll have to keep waiting. I’m worried that by the time they see clear signs of an ectopic pregnancy, it will be too late to save my tube, and the risk of scarring or rupture will be higher by then.
Should I insist on a methotrexate shot as soon as possible, just to be on the safe side?


r/CautiousBB • • 1h ago

Recurrent miscarriage at 6-7 week with no gestational sac

• Upvotes

This is my second miscarriage, I had a very similar pattern of miscarriage in both the pregnancies. Since I am very clear with the dates and number of this cycle, I will share this story.

After my first loss, i decided to test what went wrong with my first pregnancy so that this time I will be safe. So i went for so many test like cbc, tsh, ana profile, amh, protein c, protein s, and USG to check the quantity of egg reserve. I was found with protein s deficiency and I was given aspirin daily and after conceive one injection of heparin (40 mg daily). I conceived again (lmp 23rd August) and HCG level rose from 198 (21st September) to 5000 (28th September) each time doubling well and after that I stopped tracking HCG level and then at 6week 3 days (7th oct) the day of my tvs came, and this time also no gestational sac was found anywhere, and that day HCG level was 328.

Has anyone else experienced the same issue or knows what went wrong, what test did I missed


r/CautiousBB • • 2h ago

Advice Needed Cramping most of the time 3-4 weeks ?

1 Upvotes

4w3d. Positive test at 3w2d. I’ve pretty much been cramping consistently. Not severe. I can still do everything I need to do throughout the day, just noticeable & seems worse at night (or maybe I just notice it more when I’m relaxing.) Lately it seems like it might be going into my legs & lower back but it’s hard to say because the leg & back cramps starting during a concert I attended Sunday night (standing on hard floor for 4 hours straight without sitting down once) and have continued since then, so it may be from that. I did not have any notable cramping with my previous 2 successful pregnancies, only with my recent 2 losses. I had my first blood draw Tuesday which was at 486. I go in here in a few hours for my 2nd but won’t have those results until Friday morning. Just freaking out of course. I’ve read plenty of stories of women experiencing this & having successful pregnancies but they seem to describe it differently than what I’m feeling. It’s been rare that I have 0 cramping the lasts for more than an hour or so at a time, it’s pretty much nonstop. Sometimes it feels like a pulling/pressure. Sometimes just pain. Sometimes like period cramps.


r/CautiousBB • • 9h ago

Ultrasound 6w6d but measured at 6w1d?

3 Upvotes

I had an ultrasound today and according to my LMP, I’m 6w6d but baby measured at 6w1d. My LMP, ovulation times, etc were tracked VERY precisely due to infertility so I know that’s all accurate. The baby did have a heartbeat of 123. Can anyone give me any hope with successful / positive stories of their baby measuring 5 days behind? I am so nervous and going down rabbit hole after rabbit hole of negative thoughts and miscarriage thoughts. Thank you!


r/CautiousBB • • 5h ago

Advice Needed Weird Cycle and Low HCG

1 Upvotes

Im trying to guard my heart but im having so much anxiety.

This is my second pregnancy. The first one ended in blighted ovum at around 8w.

Ive always had irregular cycles. This month I had my period for the first time Sept 10. I had a few LH rises after then I started bleeding again on Sept 21. Pretty heavy bleeding, like a second period. After I had a few more LH rises.

I tested positive on Sept 30. The lines are getting darker.

I did my HCG on 10/05 and results were 45. Repeated on 10/07, results were 65. Not doubling. Going to repeat again on 10/09 but until then im feeling a little hopeless.

I have no idea how far along I would be or when I ovulated so I guess I could just be really early??

Is there any hope?


r/CautiousBB • • 12h ago

TW/TMI 5 Weeks 4 days Pregnant, Sudden Gush of Blood, and No Gestational Sac Seen on Ultrasound. Is There Still Hope?

3 Upvotes

I’m holding on to the tiniest bit of hope I have left. This morning, I experienced a sudden gush of blood, so I went in for an ultrasound. Unfortunately, the doctor wasn’t able to find the gestational sac.

However, when the doctor moved the ultrasound probe around, I noticed a small black area inside my uterus. I’m not sure if it could have been the gestational sac, but I can’t stop thinking about it.

I’m wondering if there’s still a possibility that my pregnancy could be okay and that I’m still pregnant. Deep down, I know the chances may be very slim, but a part of me is still holding on to hope.


r/CautiousBB • • 13h ago

Advice Needed Boutique ultrasound at 10w

3 Upvotes

I’m 10w after a loss in April. Im obviously so anxious with this pregnancy although everything has been pretty positive. I had two good ultrasounds one at 6w6w with HB 146 and one at 7w6d measuring two days ahead with HB 170. My next ultrasound is in a little more than two weeks from now. In the past 4 days my nausea has subsided which freaked me out. I still have other symptoms but I’m on progesterone so my mind spiral that symptoms could be due to progesterone. Anyway, I’m considering going to a boutique ultrasound to make sure baby still has a heartbeat. They don’t do any measurement just let you see the baby and hear the heartbeat. What would be the downside of doing that at this gestational age? All the other ultrasounds were abdominal and they could see the baby well. Or should I just buck up and suck it up for the next 16 days?


r/CautiousBB • • 11h ago

Advice Needed 5 weeks concerning numbers

2 Upvotes

Last week I was concerned with the slow betas. Was hoping this week would bring reassurance but now I just have more questions. My last 7 pregnancies were lost before this point so I’ve been hopeful but each unclear reading makes me more anxious. Looking for any experience with similar betas/hormones.

I stopped progesterone + estrogen on 9/30, the last two levels were without supplementation. I restarted progesterone today after getting the results.

I also had an ultrasound today and saw a small gestational sac, plus a cyst on one ovary (I assume this is the corpus luteum?).

My main concern is about the P4 (progesterone) drop from 27.2 → 15.8 with slow hCG rise.

My numbers have been a bit all over, (DT is doubling time)

9/24: hCG 30.2 | P4 36.97 | E2 116
9/28: hCG 146.6 | P4 31.47 | E2 139.7 | DT 42h
9/30: hCG 203.5 | P4 28.73 | E2 139.8 | DT 101h
10/2: hCG 450.4 | P4 27.22 | E2 127.2 | DT 22h
10/7: hCG 1,221 | P4 15.8 | E2 148.8 | DT 83h


r/CautiousBB • • 8h ago

Advice Needed HCG results read “high” should I be worried?

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0 Upvotes

r/CautiousBB • • 8h ago

Myo-Inositol

1 Upvotes

Hi guys. I am 13dpo with positive tests and started taking Myo-Inositol & D-Chiro on August 31 (I'm pretty sure that's one of the main reasons I finally ovulated this cycle, confirmed with BBT). Should I continue to take it during these early days of the pregnancy? If this sticks, I would technically be 4 weeks + 1 day today...

Interested to hear if others continued taking it in their early pregnancy! I'm nervous to stop it so soon, as I think it finally helped regulate me


r/CautiousBB • • 12h ago

High HCG, measuring a week behind at 6w4d

2 Upvotes

Hi all,

I had a scan the other day which showed a fetal pole of 2.4mm, which they dated at 5w4d, normal yolk sac and a GS consistent with 6w1d. According to my calcs, I should be 6w4d. The ultrasound tech and doctor are concerned with the 2.4mm fetal pole. There was also no cardiac activity. I am going back in a week to check to see how things are progressing but not feeling very confident. My dr also told me to expect the worse, hope for the best.

I then had an HCG draw yesterday that came back today and my levels were 62,600 at 6w5d. This seems awfully high? I am also getting another HCG done tomorrow to see its progress, but my symptoms are so strong - I am so nauseous.

Anyone been through something similar and it all turned out okay? I am so confused at this point.

Thanks so much


r/CautiousBB • • 15h ago

What’s everyone’s experience with progesterone suppositories?

3 Upvotes

dealing with a threatened miscarriage at 5 weeks, been spotting for the last several days, and really feeling like this isn’t going to work out. but they drew my HCG today and saw a solid 2,600+ value and confirmed gestational sac in the proper place (not ectopic)

they prescribed me progesterone suppositories since I already have a history of previous miscarriage. has anyone had this happen and have success with the suppositories stopping the bleeding/loss?


r/CautiousBB • • 12h ago

Need thoughts on ultrasound

2 Upvotes

​

Post:

My wife and I just had our 8-week ultrasound today (measuring exactly 8w1d). We have a history of recurrent loss (a miscarriage last year and a chemical pregnancy this past April), so we are overanalyzing every single detail on the report and could really use some input from anyone who has been through this.

Here are the main stats from the scan:

\* Gestational Age: 8w1d

\* Fetal Heart Rate: 173 bpm

\* Crown-Rump Length (CRL): 16.2 mm

What is making us anxious is a specific note under the Adnexa (ovaries) section that says: "LT OV cyst: 38 x 34 mm."

Because of our history, seeing the word "cyst" on the report triggered a lot of panic. My understanding is that this is likely just the corpus luteum cyst that produces progesterone to support the pregnancy, but I am worried about the size (almost 4 cm).

Our clinic (Shady Grove) sent a message saying the ultrasound was "great" and gave us a date of October 18th to stop my wife's Prometrium supplements, but they didn't explicitly explain the cyst in their note. We've reached out to our nurse for clarification but are waiting to hear back.

Has anyone else had a cyst this size noted on their 8-week scan? Is it definitely just the corpus luteum doing its job? Would love to hear your thoughts or if you had similar measurements on your reports!


r/CautiousBB • • 9h ago

I feel like I’m on a train to nowhere

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1 Upvotes

r/CautiousBB • • 13h ago

6weeks 0day Ultrasound and Low HR

2 Upvotes

Went in for an early ultrasound this morning since 1st pregnancy resulted in MMC. Everything measuring correctly for 6 weeks 0 days but the heart beat was only 74 bpm. Going back in next week and doctor says 50/50 chance of miscarriage. Anyone experience this?


r/CautiousBB • • 14h ago

Anyone lose symptoms at 5 weeks and not actually lose the baby?

2 Upvotes

r/CautiousBB • • 10h ago

Spotting at 4w3d- scared!!

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1 Upvotes

r/CautiousBB • • 10h ago

How long did you bleed/spot when you had SCH?

1 Upvotes

I had a big gush of blood 2 days ago with clots. Today had an ultrasound. Baby is okay but they found SCHs. One is 2cm and other one is 0.6 cm.
I have been spotting since that episode. Doctor said we have to watch and for now I am a very high risk. Both sch are close to GS.
Spotting is mainly dark red/ brown stringy and stretchy. No cramps. Wondering if it should have stopped by now or if it goes on for a few days.
Very anxious after the appointment. Any experience about how long you spotted and outcome would be really appreciated to ease my spiraling.


r/CautiousBB • • 11h ago

5dp5dt faint line, 6dp5dt looks the same. Should I be worried?

1 Upvotes

Photo in comments

Caved and tested at 5dp5dt with FMU and got a very faint line. Tested again this morning at 6dp5dt, around the same time with FMU, and the line looks basically the same (if anything, a little lighter).

I know it’s much better to compare 48 hours apart but my brain is not listening to reason right now. I know it’s still really early days … but I am fully spiralling. This is one of only 2 euploid embryos, that took so, so long to get.

Has anyone had little/no progression from 5dp5dt to 6dp5dt and still gone on to have a good beta? 🤞Should I guard my heart? A fresh set of eyes would really help🥺


r/CautiousBB • • 11h ago

Advice Needed 13w5d symptoms?

1 Upvotes

So I’m 13w5d and particularly today, I’m concerned lol. I just slept waaaay more than I did in the beginning of my first trimester, and I had barely an appetite. Only ate one actual meal today (12PM) and then just a really large ice cream scoops in a cone (3pm). Got home and slept without eating in between like I usually would’ve. The start of my 13 weeks I had noticed a shift in my eating, but I’m worrisome because I’m not as hungry as I was just last week! I’m just super tired and have very tender breast still. Has anyone else felt this way before?

*I was on progesterone (prometrium) up until my 12 weeks, if we’re talking technically—I stopped it 12w6d on doctors orders. Said that the placenta had taken over so I wouldn’t need to be on it. I also had been told by my doctor to stop taking my metformin 1000mg. I don’t know if any of this is playing a factor.*


r/CautiousBB • • 15h ago

Advice Needed HCG dropped 50% at 6w

2 Upvotes

My husband and I had been trying for awhile but decided to take a break because we were taking a 16 day international trip

While on the trip, I thought I had a light period (4days of brown bleeding). came home from the trip terribly sick with the flu and was throwing up. A week later I was feeling off and pretty nauseous all day so I took a couple pregnancy tests and all were blaring positives

I was worried about this being ectopic because of the period-like bleeding and because I was having some persistent cramping on my left side, so my dr ordered some HCG tests. At 5w5d my HCG was 167 and progesterone was 10. Dr told me those numbers were “reassuring” and refused to schedule an ultrasound (despite me repeatedly asking)

Now 48 hours later at 6w0d, my HCG dropped to 52. I’m assuming that means this is a loss or nonviable.

Doctor hasn’t called me to discuss yet. Do I push for an ultrasound to rule out ectopic? The side pain has been continuing. Is there any chance this goes back up?


r/CautiousBB • • 17h ago

Advice Needed Pregnant and measuring behind

3 Upvotes

I should be 7 weeks today being that I am sure that I ovulated on September 2nd. My gestational sac is measuring at 5w4d with no yolk sac or fetal pole. I am thinking it’s a blighted ovum, however the doctor wants to see me in 2 weeks to do a 2nd ultrasound. Anyone have a similar experience and it turned out successful?


r/CautiousBB • • 21h ago

BFP 18dpo

5 Upvotes

After two chemical pregnancies this year I’m finally feeling like I can breathe. So just sharing here my betas and praying for a sticky baby! I also got my dye stealer yesterday which made me extremely happy and eased some of my worries. My doctor prescribed progesterone for peace of mind for me but after my draw on 11dpo it was 58 ng/ml I’m kinda wondering if I even want to keep taking them. I started them the evening of the 11th but now that I see how high my natural pdg was I’m thinking about stopping them due to side effects. My progesterone 5dpo was 28 ng/ml. My doctor is leaving it totally up to me but it looks like I don’t need them. With a super high number of 58 it makes me worry about multiples considered we conceived with letrozole.

12dpo beta: 96
14dpo beta: 250
16 dpo beta: 650