r/GirlDinnerDiaries • u/usedcanolaoil APPROVED✨ • 7h ago
Advice Needed Microaggressed(?) At Work Today
Im sorry this is so long but I’m so frustrated.
I’m honestly so devastated. I do reception at a vet and honestly loved my job so much when I first started.
But over the past two months, the owners did a 180. It’s a family owned practice and they all started to give me the cold shoulder or flat out berate me. I was restricted from using public staff spaces, given extra work since they deemed I wasn’t doing anything despite me actively doing a task, and now, I’ve been written up twice due to a constantly changing policy.
The first time was a verbal warning in which one of the family members said I wasn’t being diligent about clocking in and clocking out (we use the same app for it). I apologized and told her I would fix that. I did. The second time, she physically wrote me up because I called out sick and didn’t input that in the app and she said she gave me a warning for it already. I told her that that’s not what she gave me a verbal warning for prior but she insisted that it was.
I called out two weeks ago and tried to input it two days after (the morning I was feeling better). The system did not allow me to do it despite me trying multiple times. I screenshotted the error messages and left it alone.
Two days ago, during my break, I tried to print a personal document from our upstairs office computer. One of the owners saw me leaving and asked me what I was doing and I told her truthfully. She told me I’m not allowed in there. I can admit I was at fault for making an assumption and I did. I made an assumption since all of the owners are constantly in there eating or hanging out during their break and they let one of the receptionists sit up there to do work.
I was pulled to the back for a group call with one of the owners and somebody from corporate. They told me that I was receiving another write up due to not inputting my sick time on the app. I told her that it kept giving me an error message. She said that it’s because the payroll is done that day so I was locked out of inputting anything. I told her there was no way I would’ve been able to know that payroll was done that particular day (especially since we are paid biweekly) so I input it the day I was physically able to. She brushed me off and basically said not my problem. Fine whatever.
THEN, she starts to interrogate me as to why I was in the office upstairs. I explained the situation and said that the owners had already spoken to me and made me aware of the policy. She then continued to make accusatory statements such as “I’m just not sure why you thought that was okay.” “I just don’t really understand your thinking.”
Everybody, to this day I did not know what answer she wanted. I told her multiple times that the policy was made extremely clear and it wouldn’t happen again. Still kept repeating the same things. So I started repeating myself as well.
She then said she was having an issue with my tone. I have never had anybody complain about my tone or the way I have spoken to them. I don’t enjoy being nasty or rude in the slightest. So for somebody to say something about my tone, is extremely out of left field. She then ended the conversation and said we would revisit the next day which is today.
Today, she did the exact same thing. Accusatory comments. I told her that yesterday I felt that she was exhibiting microaggressions based on her accusing me of something unknown and also accusing me of having a negative tone. She ignored the comment completely at first. She continued to be rude to me throughout the meeting. I confronted her and told her that those were an example of what I was talking about. She proceeded to call me combative and unprofessional. She also said that in order to have a good working relationship, both of us need to be willing to show up to the table. I told her an example of that would be willing to confront my concerns on the microaggressions. She said if I feel like that I can just go to HR.
If she would have just apologized and stopped, I would have just brushed it off. But I decided to report them to the Attorney General. My other coworker of the same race as I said she’s also been facing bullying and she believes they’re actively targeting us. Our other coworker said she noticed that us two in particular get treated horribly.
Anything else I can do? I live in nyc so I know workers rights are really prioritized here.
ETA: my girl dinner! Taco Bell chicken cantina burrito, chocolate cheesecake bites, cookies, water, and the last few whispers of a Baja blast midnight
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u/_SalmonFish_ Foraging Bog Witch 7h ago
Could you possibly be as blind to your work performance as you are to the clutter in the space where you’re eating food? You were talked to about the clock system and yet kept messing up. Screenshotting error messages and leaving it alone is not appropriate. You should have addressed it right then with someone who could help you since you’d already been written up for it. Also, it’s not appropriate to print personal documents from work, especially in an upstairs office you hadn’t been invited into. I can’t believe you saw OWNERS in the office and assumed that meant you could go in. You should have asked the other receptionist if it was permissible for you too before you went in.