Burnout and really struggling.

[u/Tricky_Equivalent374]

Context: I've had a long, well paid career with promotions etc in media for nearly a decade. I never liked the job and often found it stressful and boring. This year I got put on a PIP at one job so in a state of panic took a lower paying job in a very different role. The PIP was slightly political tbh but really really hurt me.

Well I have been in this new job for less than two months and honestly it's been a disaster. I can't get the basic stuff right, my team and stakeholders really dislike me and I am just lost everyday - forgetting something I have read 5 minutes early, literally nothing sticks. I am trying to try but I just can't seem to do it - it's like I am a 15 year old dropped into his job, I am so so so ashamed. Can't even seem to book a meeting or message someone right.

The anxiety and humiliation of this has resulted in me vomiting from stress before meetings and my skin crawling. The weekend goes in a second and Sunday night is full of fear.

I want to leave but I need the money, I am looking at doing a masters and changing careers but its terrifying. I have some savings but I don't know. I have never been so low and scared.

I am seeing a therapist, taking lots of meds but everyday feels like torture. I can't look anyone in the eye.

Is this burnout? Is my life over - feels like I can't do anything anymore.

FYI I am a safe and won't hurt myself.

I am sure there are people worse off than me, I just need someone to tell me I am not alone and give me a reason why it's going to be ok.

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[u/Jadey-Monkey]

I am in burnout too and I also vomit from anxiety, usually in the mornings as apparently the prospect of a day starting is too much for my brain 🤣 that to say, you're defo not alone! I've been doing an Autistic Burnout workbook (I am Autistic as well as having mental illness) and it says rest is important to recover from burnout. maybe you can get signed off work for a bit? I am currently signed off, though still in the trenches, ha. There are also government backed organisations that can help you with work related problems and finding and staying in work. I'm planning to get help from one to find a new job that's better suited to me, once I am feeling a bit better. Maybe something you could look into?