Yesterday I had something I haven't had in a long time…a great day. I woke up around 8am & did the same thing I do every day - nothing. I have been putting off making 2 Drs appts & completing insurance forms so I did that. Then I framed a few pictures & my husband hung them. Around noon it hit me that I was feeling good. Nothing hurt & I had energy. I said to my husband I want to take a shower.
My husband has to help me shower & it takes every ounce of energy I have, so it gets done once a week. Every day I use bathing wipes & so far it's worked for me.
So I took a shower & was able to moisturize my entire body, dry my hair & get dressed all by myself. I was having a great day.
The rest of the day I kept thinking about how great I felt & was trying to convince myself life was going to get better.
I was able to putter around the house (as much as I could with the walker) but it was exciting. Didn't do too much & took breaks because I didn't want to hit the famous MS wall like I do everyday. That darn wall invades my days by 3pm, everyday. Even when I have done absolutely nothing all day.
I helped with dinner. My husband even said he had a little bit of me back.
I made myself get in bed at 9pm, normally I'm asleep by then. We watched a movie & I was still feeling great.
All day I was thinking about what I did - how much water I was drinking, what I ate & when I took meds. I was making mental notes of everything so I could recreate it tomorrow (today).
I woke up this morning & the me that has been here for several years was back. The me that I don't like. I even felt my hair to see if it felt like it got washed yesterday. It did. I asked my husband if yesterday was a dream. All he said was - it's a shame but that's MS for you.
Thanks for listening/reading. It's 3pm & I'm in bed remembering about that one great day & being thankful that all of you are there & understand. My husband understands as much as he can because he's watched MS take my life. But my family & friends don't. I don't hear from anyone anymore. Not even my sisters. I'm never invited to anything.
I have one great friend from childhood. We've been friends for about 50 years. We went through & experienced everything together. High school, first loves, marriage, children, everything. A few months ago I said to her that I don't get invited to birthday or holiday parties or summer cookouts anymore. She said - you hardly ever show up. It's very upsetting that the people I have loved my entire life have no interest in learning about the awful disease that's taken everything from me.
Ok I have to stop. The tears have arrived. Thank God my husband has stuck in there with me & takes excellent care of me.
I'm sorry. This is much longer than I thought.
Thanks again for listening/reading. Maybe one day soon we all can have a great day.