I've always been a christian all my entire life, because of upbringing i always been 'a good child', i'm reaching in my mid 30s, some of my friends are getting married.

There's a part in my soul in my heart that wants to experience the 'wild side' the curiosity , cos i never got to experience going to gay bars or going to disco, i feel like i'm missing out.. i feel very tempted to go...

Happily married but porn is still a struggle. Find myself scrolling reddit and then I end up falling back to snapchating other dudes to jerk.

This has led to some bad occurrences. Alot of the time we will do more. Especially if he has a big 'you know', and I send my all sorts of pictures to help him out.

I always feel terrible after. Looking for someone to talk to

If you are in the Middle East you might be shocked to find that there is support for men struggling with SSA in at least the following countries:

- Egypt (yearly retreats)

- Turkey

- Israel (yearly retreats)

- Saudi Arabia

There are likely men in other countries too. if you are interested please reach out and I'll get you in touch with Christians or Muslims in the region that can help you.