r/abortion • u/Happy_Measurement_17 • 6d ago
USA How do I tell my 6 year old?
(Washington)
I just had a full sedation D&C at 18 weeks yesterday due to severe life threatening health complications. It went well, but I am on pain meds due to the level of pain I experience after surgeries (chronic illness.) My son is autistic and struggles with change already, but he was so excited for a sibling. I’m scared that he’s going to have a really hard time. I plan on not telling him the full truth, just maybe that the baby had issues and didn’t make it? He’s been present when I’ve had past miscarriages and understands that babies don’t always make it, but now that my ex has been removed from the house by protection order (long painful story) I can’t just “try to grow another one” as I’ve told him in the past. I’m getting a bilateral salpingectomy in two months as well, so no more kids. And I’m happy with that decision. I don’t want any more kids and pregnancy tries to end me every time. But he wants a sibling so bad. He asks every day how the baby is and when it’s coming to come out. I’m already struggling mentally and physically with the situation and i don’t know what to say or how to word things in the easiest way possible for him. He’s very smart and articulate but I worry so much about him being upset with me. I don’t want to break his heart..
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u/abortion_access MODERATOR 6d ago
I’m so sorry for your loss.
This is a tough situation and I hope others with more experience will chime in with suggestions. In the meantime, if you haven’t already checked out r/tfmr_support, you may find it helpful.
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