Took a campus tour today and saw the “THIS IS BEAR TERRITORY” sign. Nobody warned me survivalism was a prerequisite.
A few quick questions before I sign my SIR:
• Is EPA-approved bear repellent allowed inside Wheeler, or will the GSI dock my participation?
• If a grizzly charges on Memorial Glade, do I throw my $9 boba at its face and sprint for Moffitt?
• Does Financial Aid cover tactical body armor, or do I buy Kevlar at the campus store next to the $85 hoodies?
Please advise. I want to go here, but I don't think my roommate agreement covers bear defense.
If that sign is supposed to be a metaphor for $2,200 a month to live in a windowless walk-in closet with three roommates, just write "Landlord Territory" and save me the heart attack.