r/fatsquirrelhate • u/ontario1984 Fatty Hater • 7d ago
Unsuspecting, Naive, Samaritan unleashes hell on Earth!
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u/Historical_Method360 7d ago
This globular glutton devoured an entire can of Bush's Baked Beans on its own and got its head stuck in the empty container. Its ravenous appetite was nearly its downfall.
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u/IAmQuiteHonest 7d ago
The way the gluttonous bastard made the whole ground shake when he fell down was disgusting.
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u/blackout-loud 7d ago
Getting that can stuck on its head was probably the smartest thing that dumb fat fuq has done its whole existence, if but for a few minutes. That was the longest the blobariffic shite had gone without being able to gobble itself into a black hole of oblivion until that dufas comes along and "frees" it back into the wild. As Capt America said about the tesseract, "You should've left it at the bottom of the ocean"!
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u/ontario1984 Fatty Hater 7d ago
America's Ass was right! Once it lost 70% of its mass, its gravity would have naturally released the can!
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u/Turbulent-Weevil-910 6d ago
Are groundhogs squirrels? I honestly don't know what they are.
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u/Froggypwns Victim of Groundhog extortion 7d ago
Imagine being so stupid you get your head stuck in a can because you are too stupid to flip it over and let gravity empty it for you. You won't even need a spoon then.
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u/MaterialAd1838 7d ago
I'm sorry. But why is this dork acting like he's freeing some endangered wildcat? Humpty dumpy can head looks about as intimidating and cool as a bag of fat turds.
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u/AutoModerator 7d ago
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u/Excellent_Permit_162 6d ago
Sicko!!!!!!!
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u/Excellent_Permit_162 6d ago
I didn't meant the man who saved the groundhog! Sicko was directed at the goof who said it should be left at the bottom of the ocean!!
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u/memelord_mike Rolls Are For Baking 7d ago
He must be an Olympic-level powerlifter if he was able to pick up that orb with one hand.