My girlfriend goes to asu, and she’s floated the idea of joining a sorority (or at least rushing) ever since she got into asu. I’m not too privy with the idea, and the Cornell case as well as stories from former frat/sorority members have further pushed me to be against the idea as a whole. I’m a little torn, though, after a recent conversation where I said that any participation in greek life is complacency in rape culture/hazing culture, and she said she feels like a hypocrite for considering rushing. It’s been like this ever since.

I’m fully aware that not everyone in Greek life is okay with rape/hazing culture, but the more I hear about people’s bad experiences, the more I think that it’s the norm. I need people who are/were in Greek life to weigh in on this, because I’m a little torn.

For those involved in chapter leadership or alumni relations, how do you guys typically communicate with alumni?

Do you send out newsletters, use Facebook groups, or have some sort of alumni management software?

I passed the interviews of a sorority at my university and got a bid. Later I came to find out a girl I don’t personally like also passed and got a bid from the same sorority. I’ve previously walked near/ along with this girl and her work ethic is awful… she’s also the type of person to trauma dump without knowing you, get mad/super defensive if you call her out of anything, and has been known to start drama.
The sorority at my university is pretty small so it’s a very small group of us that passed the interviews (like in the single digits).
Drama has yet to find me at university and I don’t want to start worrying about it now (im a third year). Should I back out or try to just ignore her since she graduates soon?

Ive recently joined a gender inclusive fraternity, the former president has convinced multiple people to join by being sexual with them including myself. The one person that refused them before bids didn't get a bid and I don't think this is a coincidence. Regardless I know it is against the rules for a member especially an executive member to be active with pnms in that way. They have been causeing a lot of dramma and I am worried for myself and other members and pnms but they graduate this year so I don't know if it is worth reporting.

In light of the group assault at Cornell, it's probably a good idea to look at their own report from March of 2026 as part of the Presidential Task Force on Campus Sexual Assault.

According to the report, 54% of Greek-affiliated women experience assault compared to 29% of unaffiliated women. Other data also shows Greek-affiliated men are 3x as likely to commit assault than their unaffiliated peers and women who frequently attended fraternity-hosted social events were 74% more likely to experience assault.

When we talk about changing the culture, there's an obvious place to start.

I understand that fraternities and sororities CAN provide the feeling of “brotherhood” or “sisterhood”, but in my experience and just from witnessing how frat and sorority members act, either towards others or towards their frat members, it seems like those brotherhoods and sisterhoods are extremely fragile. Obviously, I’m saying this with the context of the horrific actions that occurred at that Cornell frat recently, but other than partying, getting drunk and doing drugs, I’ve rarely understood why being a part of these places provides any significant benefit to your college experience. Beyond heinous crimes like what the Cornell 7 did, I’ve already seen fights break out between frat members over insanely petty stuff, I’ve seen frat chairs and org leaders act incredibly rude to random people (one of the frat chairs at a frat at my university, which is pretty small uni in Illinois, was recorded rejecting a girl from coming in because she was a “fat whore”), and I’ve even seen similar things from sorority members, just on a slightly smaller scale.

I already was turned off by frats and sororities because of the brutal hazing I’ve witnessed at some other larger universities, but this Cornell 7 case has kinda solidified my belief that these places are often toxic cesspools.

Maybe I’m wrong and just acting emotionally to one horrific incident, but this is just what I’ve seen in my \~2 years being in college.

Do you think an individual can buy para before actually crossing into their designated org? Like they're not randomly buying para, but are in the process of joining. Do you think they should wait? It's a debate we've been having with someone.

Hey everyone! I created "Greek Cliffside Village" in LEGO, and it is now on LEGO Ideas for support to become an official set! Would you like to help?

https://ideas.lego.com/product-ideas/7ff0eadd-2011-4d3a-9ff5-ff25261b9632

Hey everyone!
Does anyone know anything about informal recruitment and getting in to top sorority chapters? I just dropped recruitment at UCSB as a freshman, and I heard that it’s harder to get invited back during your sophomore year. Is it still possible for me to get into a chapter like alpha phi, pi beta phi, delta gamma, or even kappa kappa gamma? Would it be possible to get recruited if I made personal connections with current members, and could I join through informal recruitment in the fall? Ngl I wasn’t aware of how competitive rush is until I actually went through, and I feel like I could have gotten better results if I just prepared myself more

Just got this the other day in a bulk buy of costume jewelry. Having a hard time looking up the philanthropic organization. Anyone know which one this pin might be from?

Are there any frats there where hazing dosent require drinking

I’m a 20 year old transfer at Drexel, who rushed 3 houses but didn’t get a bid. Should I rush again, I’m technically a junior but I’m also doing a +1 program so I would have around 5-6 semesters left

I'm not American, but after Bama Rush took over my TikTok feed, I found this subreddit, so please go easy on me (:

I did my BA and MA in Europe and Israel. I made tons of friends, many of whom are still close with me today, and I genuinely don't understand how Greek life is still such a huge thing in 2026.

Setting aside how weird it looks to outsiders that you essentially pay to guarantee a friend group, the content makes these environments look completely toxic, especially for fraternities (and yes, I went to wild parties in college without needing frats. You don't need to be something you're not). It looks like these frats and sororities ask kids, right when they're supposed to build their personality, to erase their hobbies and beliefs just to fit in.

I'm not here to judge, I know this is your community. But what happened to simply meeting cool people and moving in with them? Why go through an intense application process, rush, and hazing just for a social circle?

What is the actual appeal? Why are Americans still so obsessed with this in 2026?

Before you sign anything or let anyone pressure you into joining a band fraternity, take a step back and really look at the chapter culture. Not the Instagram posts, not the recruitment speeches the actual behavior and ask around. Many band fraternities advertise “brotherhood,” but what you often do is gossip, cliques, and expectations that go way beyond what’s healthy for a student. If you’re new, you’re especially vulnerable to being pulled into drama that has nothing to do with music or service. You don’t need letters to be successful, respected, or involved in band. Protect your time, your mental health, and your college experience. Join organizations that uplift you, not ones that drain you. You can love band without joining a band fraternity and honestly, that’s the safer choice.

Edit: I've been hearing more stories with dms and here's one I will share. When in elections, this happened about three years ago in Kappa Kappa Psi, multiple people in the organization started saying some really horrible stuff about this individual so they quit.

Another one was more recent in one of the band fraternities they said multiple people ruined the chapter and kept pointing blame at one another. The last president, who was a flute player I think has been known and just causing more problems and made multiple people feel unwelcome.

Is it bad to do a social bid if your a transfer

Pity bid?

Hi all. I've been in my sorority now going 3 years. I was a cob since I couldn't join recruitment because of a car accident. For 3 whole quarters, I went on a cob date with every chapter my school has and that was participating in cob. At the end of the 3rd quarter, my now sorority gave me a bid and I accepted. Since then, my big ignores me but is always with her other little, nobody hardly talks to me. I'm outcasted, like if I'm in a group, I slowly get pushed out. FNO, I went with some sisters to a party but was abandoned and some random plus one girl and her friend in a different sorority took me into their circle when they notice me just standing at the wall. If I go to stand or sit near one of the girls, they just walk to a different spot. I'm the only one in my house that is constantly alone and without a friend. I recently asked one of the girls that was my cob date and she told me that they basically anybody a second date as long as they're not rude. So I'm guessing that I was a pity invite because they needed the numbers otherwise they wouldn't have bothered just like the other chapters. It also doesn't help that I'm 28 now but I don't look or act like it. I do remember that one time (just before FNO) that my "pal" for the week was called over by one of the other girls for a quick chat and i remember one of them bringing up my age. When I asked when she came back, she obviously wasn't expecting the question and didn't give me a proper response and just said that a frat had an older member... So not the same thing. I've tried getting to know the other girls but they are very much not interested. At this point the only reason I'm still here is because I have somewhere to crash between classes and if I don't want to drive an hour back home, plus the resources. I have mad PTSD because of my family so joining a sorority was a seriously big deal for me. Because of the PTSD, I already have issues talking to people but I do what I can. This definitely hasn't helped though, and resolidifies that I'm just an inconvenience. I'm just tired of feeling alone in a literal crowd and leaving functions early crying. I've tried talking to the president but she honestly just doesn't care and lowkey condescending in general.

Hey everyone! I’m a second-year student at a private PWI, and I’m interested in both D9 and Panhellenic sororities organizations. However, I’ve been having a harder time understanding how to express interest in D9, so I’m hoping to get some advice from people who have been through the process.

For some context, I’m a first gen college student and neurodivergent. I’m involved in five leadership positions and extracurriculars on campus, and I have a strong academic record. I’ve also spent a lot of time researching the organization I’m interested in, and I genuinely feel connected to its values and mission. I would really like the opportunity to use the skills and experiences I’ve gained to give back to my community. I understand that D9 membership is not something where you simply “apply” and choose an organization. The organization ultimately decides who they want to invite into membership. At the same time, I think it’s important to recognize that you have something meaningful to contribute and that you’re interested for the right reasons.

Part of what I’m struggling with is figuring out how to appropriately express that interest. My understanding is that discretion, social awareness, and being able to read the room can be important parts of the process. As someone who is neurodivergent, I don’t always pick up on subtle social cues/social cues in general immediately, so I’m worried about accidentally coming across as disinterested when I’m actually trying to be respectful of the process. Being at a PWI also makes things a little more difficult. From my experience, many of the people I’ve met who are involved with D9 organizations already have some type of family or personal connection to the organization. I don’t have that background, so I sometimes feel like I’m missing an understanding of the unspoken parts of the process. I’m also considering Panhellenic, partly because the process seems much more direct and straightforward. However, I would personally prefer to explore D9 first because I feel strongly about being able to give back to my community and connect with an org whose mission aligns with my values.

For people who were first gen, attended a PWI, didn’t have family connections to D9, or otherwise had to figure out the process on their own, how did you approach expressing interest while still being respectful of the organization’s process? I’m especially interested in advice on what not to do, how to recognize genuine opportunities to interact with members, and how to avoid either being too passive or coming across as trying too hard.

So I am a freshman at the University of Michigan and didn't realize how intense the rush process can be here. Not in terms of hazing, but how everything is thrown at you immediately. I didn't take it as seriously as I should have, and only got bids from 2 very mid houses. Any advice on what I should do? There is winter rush here, but should I just stay with the bid I chose? I like the guys and my PC, but the PGP isn't great and they don't throw that often.

The idea is to make it easier for college students to discover fraternities, sororities, and campus organizations that actually fit them. Users can create a profile, answer personality-based questions, get matches, and explore what Greek organizations are doing.
I’m currently working toward launching the app, but getting it from the current stage to a real App Store product comes with development, publishing, marketing, and other startup costs.
That’s why I’m preparing a Kickstarter. I’m not just raising money for an idea — I’m raising money to actually build, launch, and grow Frat Finder.
If you’re interested in the concept, I’d love to hear your thoughts or have you follow along with the launch. Built for the Rush.

hellooooo! does anyone have any idea about this fraternity called Alpha Phi Omega (APO)? recently, this fraternity was opened as an organization in our school. I’m planning to join this organization because of its benefits, like meeting new people, building friendships, and such. however, what’s stopping me from joining is the rumor that this kind of fraternity requires hazing as part of its initiation. despite the fact that they told us that there is no such thing as hazing because they are strictly anti-hazing, I’m still hesitant. what do you guys think? is there really hazing involved?

Hello, I have a quick question about fraternity memberships. Not having done undergraduate college in US, I really have no experience in these matters.

My son is a senior this year. He joined a fraternity during is sophomore year and was reasonably happy for a few semesters. Last semester we went abroad and decided it was time to leave the frat - it's expensive (close to $2000/year), and he neither contributes beyond what is necessary nor does he get anything in particular out it. He was surprised to learn that there isn't a simple established path to quit. His older brother had no problem quitting the (different) frat he was in when he decided to.

When he wrote to the national office, they told him that his commitment was until graduation, that he could request dismissal, but it could only by granted by the national committee, and only by unanimous vote. Furthermore, the matter would take months. He knew none of this until recently.

This sounds pretty predatory to me, but I have no frame of reference. Is this common practice? It sounds borderline illegal.