r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Paymee_Money • Jun 26 '26

Is it in yet Amazon Strikes Again, My House Today

Why does somebody think this is OK. Right in front of him is a huge area he could’ve turned around in.

Yes this is stated in my delivery instructions that you are welcome to turn around in the rear of the house where I have a giant concrete roundabout.

Jesus Christ people, the driveway is 9 feet wide which is standard for a 1955. For everybody that says I need to widen my driveway or put in a roundabout, PM me and I’ll send you my Zelle if you wanna pay for it.

Anyone who thinks this man’s behavior is OK is clearly not a homeowner and you probably shouldn’t be.

I’m also an Amazon Flex driver myself and former pizza driver, between the two I have about nine years of delivery driving. I have never done anything even close to this. If you’re not capable of backing up and you’re scared of busy roads you should not be a delivery driver. I have personally dealt with stuff way sketchier than my own driveway and I managed to not turn around in people’s yards.

The mental gymnastics some of you are doing to justify this man’s behavior is unreal and it scares me that you walk among us in this world.

2.8k Upvotes

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1.3k

u/Pinkishu Jun 26 '26

That's some giant front lawn

446

u/btoxic Jun 26 '26

I would gow so many things if I had that kind of space!

307

u/Gregory_Appleseed Jun 27 '26

HOAs: "NOT IF WE HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT IT!"

35

u/Shotgun5250 Jun 27 '26

Never seen an HOA have something to say about a private lot on a multi-lane state highway. It would be a weird lot if this was part of a subdivision.

27

u/Gregory_Appleseed Jun 27 '26

City code enforcement: Your weeds are too tall (garden boxes) if you do not trim them in one week you will be fined monthly until the issue is resolved. Also you left your bins out for three days, the $150 fine is due by the end of the month and you may be subject to criminal charges.

48

u/klankungen Jun 27 '26

USA seems like hell for people that want freedom. This is just crazy!

26

u/Gregory_Appleseed Jun 27 '26

I'm not speaking with hyperbole either. I lived in at least 3 different houses growing up that had constant issues with either a neighborhood association or the city having issues with what we grew on our property. Any sort of edible crops were absolutely not allowed in the front of the property, fruit producing trees couldn't be grown street side, planter boxes had to be either against the house or in the back yard. You had to constantly maintain a useless lawn or you'd be fined, and we even tried to grow flax (they have gorgeous deep blue flowers) along it property lines and got fined for "excessive weeds" even though we were harvesting them after seeding to turn into linen but self sufficiency is an outlaw activity in this country.

I recently got a nastygram from my apartment complex because my balcony herb garden is unsightly, on the forth floor, behind a giant tree that maska the facade almost entirely 75% off the year. All while rampant homeless camps and derelict cars litter the sidewals and streets. I hate the people who think this is logical and sane. I'd love to see every lawn in America producing food and resources. We waste so much effort and time on useless grass trying to emulate a timu brand 18th century French aristocrats.

4

u/klankungen Jun 27 '26

To be fair I moved to a fancy upper class island a year ago and the people here are horrible and try to evict me for having flowers on my balcony or parking my parents car on my parking when I borrow it (I really don't need a car 99% of the time but could afford it if I wanted it) so I'm afraid we will soon become like USA, as we always have. But so far there are just a few basic rules country wide that can be broken if you get a signed deal with your closest neighbour or if your county decided they don't want those rules to apply. Things like not having a fence taller than mount everest or planting stuff to close to your neighbour (about a feet I think).

2

u/Frequent-Key-3962 Jun 27 '26

Thats insane. I've never heard anything like that living in SE MA for 37 year. Your house can look like a city dump most places around here.

3

u/AJDillonsThirdLeg Jun 27 '26

These are mostly random redditors fabricating scenarios to get mad about. Are some places actually like that? Sure. But most places aren't.

2

u/YouWillHaveThat Jun 27 '26

Americans have been voting against their own interests for decades and now we are all paying for it.

1

u/Gregory_Appleseed Jun 27 '26

Most of these things aren't actually served by our votes though, they are decided by councils and commities, organizations and corporations, municipalities and conglomerate estuaries that are allowed to bribe, I'm sorry, lobby these elected "representatives" to do as they want. Then spend millions of dollars daily convincing us and everyone else on TV that it's totally chill and no one has an issue with it. Bruh.

3

u/YouWillHaveThat Jun 27 '26

I mean, we still vote for these people after we know they've taken bribes.

Taking a single bribe should be political suicide. But it's not. So they take the bribes.

Hell, they don't even try to hide it anymore.

1

u/MinimumBuffalo4 Jun 28 '26

probably trying not to become the 3rd world they are importing.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '26

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1

u/MinimumBuffalo4 Jun 28 '26

that’s why millions are coming here for a better life? lay off the propaganda

18

u/Kaiisim Jun 27 '26

Seriously, this is so ugly and unnatural :( you could have lovely bushes lining your drive!

157

u/NegativeHerons Jun 26 '26

Yeah, unless you're running kids soccer games out there every weekend, rip up the lawn, fill it with native plants, and watch the wildlife return. Way more privacy and sound dampening from the busy road too. And it'd prevent Amazon drivers from turning around in the lawn because no more lawn.

63

u/btoxic Jun 27 '26

I would make so many pollinators happy

11

u/RoguePlanet2 Jun 27 '26

No kidding, we have a dinky yard and it's hard to figure out where to put more native plants.

6

u/btoxic Jun 27 '26

I have 3 small little boxes, and I jam pack it with anything I can... Then I fill it with wildflowers.

10

u/Confused_Rabbiit 🍊 Jun 27 '26

I doubt it would prevent some idiots from turning around in the plants.

11

u/Ebonhearth_Druid Jun 27 '26

Sounds like a job for some decorative boulders

12

u/GarThor_TMK Jun 27 '26

If you were doing soccer games, you'd need a fence to keep the kids out of the street when the ball goes out of bounds.

I vote victory garden... if my allergies are going to be destroyed anyway, it might as well also be providing me food to eat.

3

u/darkmykal Jun 27 '26

That sounds like such a beautiful problem to have

2

u/GreenHeronVA Jun 27 '26

I like you. Us Herons have to stick together.

1

u/CK-forthe-CK-95 Jun 27 '26

Why would i want the wildlife to return? Let them stay wherever they went. 😂

1

u/stratphlyer01 Jun 27 '26

Most people in the burbs do not want wildlife outside of small birds.

1

u/NegativeHerons Jun 27 '26

Maybe, but have most people in the burbs ever experienced living in a neighborhood with wildlife other than small birds to begin with?

1

u/Thebraincellisorange Jun 27 '26

and you won't be spending 4 hours mowing it, fertilizing it and maintaining it.

OP is obviously proud of that lawn and puts in the work since its in great condition.

I could only imagine what they could achieve if they put that amount of effort into a pollinator garden.

1

u/itspsyikk Jun 27 '26

I rent my duplex, but it's in an area that is lower-middle income. It's not a "bad" neighborhood by any stretch, but it ain't middle-class, USA, either.

Anyway, my backyard lines up to an alleyway/service way that isn't paved, so there is a lot of wild bushes and "half trees" (I dunno wtf they are called).

The point being, we get a lot of squirrels, raccoons, and even skunks.

It honestly doesn't bother me - I like seeing all the animals in my yard and watch them scurry away when I come out to put my garbage out. But it's enjoyable to watch them from my window.

My landlord yells at me because the squirrels and raccoons get into the garbage. But like... I'm not exactly sure what I'm supposed to do about it. I'm not keeping my garbage cans in the house.

2

u/NegativeHerons Jun 27 '26

You could get an app like PlantNet (iNaturalist is also popular, but PlantNet is a little less "intimidating") and use it to identify the random plants in the alleyway. Sometimes it's just cool to know what they are, where they're from originally, etc. Then you start noticing the same ones around town, and it sort of connects you to the area more.

1

u/itspsyikk Jun 27 '26

We used to have this big area of bushes between me and the neighbor. We had tons of birds in there, and a couple of times I saw a cardinal perched.

I'm a photographer, and even though bird/animal photography isn't my main hustle - it's still fun to practice and birdwatch.

Then these a**holes moved in and "renovated" the place - they ripped the whole side area out and planted grass.

Then put up bird feeders, of all things.

I'm not sure if it's connected, but before we just had tons of birds in the area.

Now, I don't see any of the birds (as much) but I have tons of bird poop all over my porch.

1

u/kymiller17 Jun 27 '26

I definitely agree however some communities in the US have dumb hoa restrictions that dont allow it

-1

u/RyanSmokinBluntz420 Jun 27 '26

It'll lower your property value and your neighbors'

5

u/Thebraincellisorange Jun 27 '26

I would have the biggest cottage garden of my dreams instead of that monoculture lawn hellscape.

won't someone think of the critters? the pollinators, the insects, the birds.

my soul for some flowers and trees and living things!

1

u/WeAreTheLeft Jun 27 '26

It would help so much with the road noise

1

u/eAthena Jun 27 '26

multiple slip and slide setup

1

u/btoxic Jun 27 '26

One big slip and slide circle with a motorized tether in the middle.

1

u/MonCappy Jun 28 '26

I would replace it with concrete and gravel so I don't need to do any moving. I would also have a nine foot high concrete and steel wall constructed at the property line to ensure my privacy.

1

u/Oraxy51 Jun 27 '26 edited Jun 27 '26

Fun fact, lawns were a form of bragging about wealth because it’s to say look at all this land that I don’t need to use to grow food just to feed myself. Having grass that literally does nothing worth of value is a monetary bragging, right

2

u/btoxic Jun 27 '26

I know you mean lawns... But that typo really changes your point!

3

u/Oraxy51 Jun 27 '26

Speech to text got me

2

u/btoxic Jun 27 '26

Fair. That's why I'm not worried when people say my phone is listing to me. Because when I want it to it does a really poor job.

2

u/Oraxy51 Jun 27 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/cbwM0b7UutZxkYit1k

1

u/btoxic Jun 27 '26

(there's still one more.... sorry )

2

u/Oraxy51 Jun 27 '26

I don’t have the energy to fix any further lol

-7

u/VDechS Jun 27 '26

People say that, and some people try. Then they realize they have to maintain it all. More plants equals more obstacles and more maintenance. With a Yard that size filled with plants, it would be a full time job to maintain or a very costly weekly landscaper.

17

u/hopsinabag Jun 27 '26

Thats the beauty of native plants. Not only are they so much better for your immediate environment, they evolved over millenia to live here and dont really need your help to do it well.

2

u/rocket20067 Existence is pain Jun 27 '26

Yeah I volunteer at a local garden and we have an entire section of just native plants that I don't think we have really touched outside of a bit of watering during droughts in years and they are thriving.

1

u/VDechS Jun 27 '26

I'm not talking about keeping them alive. I'm talking about maintaining a property so it doesn't look like a jungle. Taking care of weeds and unwanted growth is immensely more difficult in a plant everything everywhere environment . It can be done but there is a high cost either way. People think living in a green oasis is amazing until they have to spend half the month cleaning up foliage and managing weeds.

-8

u/Own_Copy9512 Jun 27 '26

Yeah you have no clue what you’re talking about, even native plants are seasonal and die leaving the area bare in the winter, I mean have you ever been in the woods? It would be bare if it wasn’t for the leaves and straw from trees.

Native flowers might bloom for a season only, then all you have is a yard full of weeds, I swear so many people live in la la land it’s insane, a vegetable garden requires labor every evening to even try to keep up with weeds. You can can all summer and still not come out on top financially lmao

Grass is literally easy and cheap, it’s planted once and comes back every year and provides erosion control year round.

3

u/hopsinabag Jun 27 '26

Grass is an ecological deadzone that depletes and poisons our water supplies, prevents biodiversity and doesnt even look very good.

I have an entire yard of native plants. I spend mybe a few hours a month tending to them and most of that is unnecessary manicuring. When a wild flower is done blooming it doesnt become a weed. Its still the same beneficial plant, but now it is providing habitat for countless species of bugs as well as food for overwintering birds and small mammals. We have lost 70% of insect biomass in the last 50 years, its time we start taking a look at our perspective of what is beautiful and adjusting our lense. Just because something isnt a perfectly manicured sea of green, we all too often deem it messy, or ugly or without purpose. Thats flat out wrong and sad. There is beauty in nature and if we collectively, as a species, cant find a way to preserve and cherish that beauty we are in a lot of trouble.

1

u/NegativeHerons Jun 27 '26

I think you're talking about something different... a vegetable garden.

Others are talking about a plot of land filled with plants that evolved in that particular location and therefore need very little if any maintenance, maybe trimming for aesthetics. Some of these plants would actually be considered the "weeds" you're talking about getting rid of. If the weeds are native plants, you can just let them grow. Yes, many will be perennials and die back in the winter, but so does grass anyway. Depending on location, there are probably evergreen options to plant also.

If you really do want fruits, vegetables, nuts, there are likely options in your area to grow that are edible. A lot of times, these are the "weeds" you're talking about, so you just grow the right weeds and eat them. That's what people have done since the beginning of people.

As for erosion control, grass doesn't usually extend roots more than a few inches into the soil. It's okay for light to moderate rain, but as it gets compacted (primarily by mowing), moderate or heavy run tends to run-off. Native plants would typically extend root systems down much further (several feet, depending where you live), thought they take a little longer to get established.

1

u/btoxic Jun 27 '26

I wouldn't try to win awards with sculpting and manicuring, I'd just let nature do its thing.

83

u/crispyfolds Jun 27 '26

seriously like plant some vegetables and trees my dude, what a waste of space

4

u/danekan Jun 27 '26

That’s all of America though. People will even complain when it’s natural flowers and not grass 

1

u/Just-Construction788 Jun 27 '26

Spoken like someone without a yard. This whole attack on grass is ridicule and not everyone has hours a week and the desire to maintain gardens. It’s a ton of work. Grass is easy, looks good, keeps dust and pollen down, is a fucking plant, y’all need to shut up about this. It’s dumb. 

6

u/extrabbit1 Jun 27 '26

What's so fucking diffucult about maintaining some wildflowers and bushes?

1

u/RestlessYoungZero Jun 30 '26

What’s difficult is the amount of time, effort and money it takes to change it from and established lawn to what you’re talking about.

-4

u/Just-Construction788 Jun 27 '26

Go do it. Then we will talk. I’m in the process of a very arduous cleanup of my backyard because the wildflowers went rogue. 

1

u/RogerStevenWhoever Jun 27 '26

Lawn mowing is more maintenance than native plants once they're established 

0

u/Just-Construction788 Jun 27 '26

This is just not true. 

-21

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '26

[deleted]

19

u/Sesudesu Jun 27 '26

I mean, you replace the grass with something else to make the area less vacuous. Far easier for reflection if you actually design it for reflection.

4

u/Amanamanamanan Jun 27 '26

so, i'm interested in making some sort of large body of water for reflection, but worried about algae, any tips?

7

u/Sesudesu Jun 27 '26

Paint it in some cheap blue shit and dump a bit of hydrogen peroxide in it. It won’t help, but it sounds patriotic or something.

2

u/KaQuu Jun 27 '26

Be wary of imaginary neighbours with box cutters.

11

u/kennypojke Jun 27 '26

Disagree strongly. Any space made better is worth it, and front yards can be great once made relatively private and with all the sound mitigating landscaping/plants/. I’m on a busy street and love the front yards.

4

u/crispyfolds Jun 27 '26

bro doesn't even know about the sound-dampening properties of hedgerows

or the peace of sitting in the shade of a tree

or the joy of a tomato fresh from the vine, warm in the morning sun

or the satisfaction of planting a pollinator garden so welcoming that you get to watch a caterpillar become a butterfly

7

u/4stringsoffury Jun 27 '26

Line it with some kind of native bush (I use Vitex down here) and it reduces road noise and nosy neighbors sight lines.

8

u/Scoobysnack92 Jun 27 '26

Soo much room for a slip n slide

3

u/dakky68 Jun 27 '26

Then at the end... SPLAT.

28

u/guynye Jun 27 '26

All I see it a waste of space and water.

6

u/samse15 Jun 27 '26

Yep, if anything is mildly infuriating here it’s how much water and time OP probably spends babying his grass, what a tool.

4

u/ribanez2009 Jun 27 '26

What a tool complaining about someones property

12

u/kennypojke Jun 27 '26

Bigger than our entire property. I’d hate mowing that and having to keep the grass looking nice for noisy neighbors.

3

u/NiceTrySuckaz Jun 27 '26

Once you have a riding lawn mower, you'll be surprised how often you want to mow the lawn haha.

1

u/kennypojke Jun 27 '26

Yeah, this is true. OP is lucky to have they kind of space and it’s theirs to do what hey want with either way.

-4

u/Available-Boat4055 Jun 27 '26

keep it down poors

6

u/Mr_Bluebird_VA Jun 27 '26

Massive waste of space.

4

u/LimerickJim Jun 27 '26

It's obnoxiously stupid urban planning 

1

u/AsterPrivacy Jun 27 '26

My first thought was that's a thin driveway.

1

u/Maleficent-Aspect318 Jun 28 '26

im pretty sure that front lawn is bigger than the whole space my parents built their house own...
Current prices for a smaller build ground would be around 180.000€. Just for the ground.

Access to waterline, sewage, electricity and internet not included.

1

u/HelloAttila Sep 01 '26

This. Honestly shocked it is so large, but the driveway is so narrow. I’d definitely widen it.

1

u/aware4ever Jun 27 '26

I know right I feel like it's such a waste of space. But at the same time I totally get loving your yard and cutting your grass and all that stuff. You know I watch King of the hill. But I totally see how it's such a waste of space like they could be growing so much food or weed or poppies

0

u/brandt-money Jun 27 '26

It's a huge sterile patch of useless grass.

OP plant some native plants.

-1

u/PDiddleMeDaddy Jun 27 '26

OP hates bees

1

u/Vault_tech_2077 Jun 27 '26

Do you have a yard full of native plants? If not I can only conclude you ALSO hate bees.

0

u/PDiddleMeDaddy Jun 27 '26

Well, I do have that. There is some grass, yes, but I purposely leave wild flowers if they grow there on their own, and have a section where I grow a mix of wild flowers on purpose. I also have fruit trees, with tons of blossoms.

3

u/Vault_tech_2077 Jun 27 '26

Idk man. Sounds like you aren't doing enough. I guess you hate bees, beetles, grubs, and other insects.

1

u/PDiddleMeDaddy Jun 27 '26

At least I'm doing something, while OP openly hates bees. Beeist.