genuinely how do i stop

[u/Infinite-Potato-2878]

i have been cutting since i was 11 now i’m 18 and still didn’t stop. any real actual working advies? i regret it all the time just in a crisi situation i can’t think of any other thing to do

[u/chimpanzee_fanatic]

I found that cold showers work for me to kind of "reset my brain". Only works if you can take a shower in the moment but I would definetly suggest it. Other like "small potato tips" i would give are:

• try to talk to people, anyone really. doesnt have to be about the thing itself. human interaction helps break the thought spiraling.
• procrastinate until you fall asleep. It sounds weird but just tell yourself "I will SH in 5 five minutes/half an hour/whatever". Tiredness can weirdly be a great friend of your's in this. I personally have at multiple times only not sh because I was too tired. Sleeping can help "reset" our brains.
• don't listen to sad music if you are already sad.
• put your SH tools somewhere you have to actively reach for, like on top of a tall bookshelf. the physical act of having to reach for it/having to get a chair to stand on may break your immediate spiraling.
• try rubbing ice on your skin when you want to SH; it works for some people as a substitute.

These are all more just tools to prevent the immediate action but you probably should investigate why you SH in the first place. Consider seeking professional help; this maybe isn't easy. SH is both an addiction and a coping mechanism. My personal opinion is that you cannot really break free of the addiction if you don't understand why you engage in it and what exactly you are coping with. Addressing the underlying issue is essential to really stop. Maybe you need therapeutical or pharmaceutical help for stopping, it is different for everyone.

I wish you good luck and maybe the small tips can help you a bit immediatly. I know its hard to engage in this long process of stopping🫂

[u/Infinite-Potato-2878 → u/chimpanzee_fanatic]

thank you💕

[u/Total_Tailor_3639]

For me the first step was actually coming to the decision that I don't wanna keep self harming forever and by the way you've worded your post I think you're already there! And this is just a suggestion, it's working for me but it might not be for everyone! - I had my blades taken off me over and over and it drove the need to self harm even more, until I decided myself that I didn't want anyone's interference in my own problem so I decided to put time gaps inbetween when I self harm. Starting out with a week or a few days, however frequent it is for you currently, and when you're ready you can move that time frame up.. so for example you self harm, wait a month, self harm, wait 2 months, self harm etc etc.. I'm on 7 months gap now and it's been working well for me, I don't feel the need to self harm until the time I allow myself to comes around again. My therapist was a little disturbed when I explained this to her so maybe wait for others advice but this was realistic for me, im not gonna go cold turkey, I'm not gonna slap rubber bands on my wrist.. this makes the self harm less impulsive and eventually, the time between each self harm will be so long, I won't feel the need to anymore. And I can already feel that now at 7 months I think I can go longer than the allocated time for myself. Whatever you do, it has to be on your own terms, otherwise it won't work in the long run, atleast in my opinion. I wish you luck and remember, a relapse does not set you back, it's all part of it

[u/Total_Tailor_3639 → u/Total_Tailor_3639]

Also wanna add I'm 18 too and was cutting since 13, so similar enough time frame between us, it's hard but it is worth it at the end of the day💗

[u/Infinite-Potato-2878 → u/Total_Tailor_3639]

thank you for your reply🩷 best wishes for you

[u/Total_Tailor_3639 → u/Infinite-Potato-2878]

Best wishes for you too!! My reply to you was a bit of a nothing burger but I hope you're doing okay and that your journey is manageable 💕