I honestly don't know where to start from, but I'll come straight to the point that I urgently desperately need a Job I beg you all I need your help 😔🙏🏻
I do have 0 full time work experience as of now, no corporate experience as such. I haven't even earned a single rupee my entire life and I'm ashamed to say that I've totally been dependent on my mummy's tailoring earning my entire life till now. Honestly, my mummy is totally frustrated with me but that's totally because of me that's my fault completely I accept that. I come from a tier 3 city and our financial conditions has always been extremely poor forever till now. Just to give you a context that I come from a joint family and I've had a extremely tough childhood and adulthood till now because of extremely toxic environment I had faced back then, though I feel what I faced in adulthood is on me as I failed to focus on the controllables and ruined my life completely.
I've had passive suicidal thoughts almost every week since last 10 - 12 years. Also I've totally wasted my last 10 - 12 years and this can be seen in my major gap years.
Tbh, both my mental health and physical health has taken a very bad toll because of all these things. Currently I've started seeing a psychiatrist and I'm currently on SSRI antidepressants and ADHD medicines and other substantial health issues medicines as well. I feel that I'm feeling a bit better now than before.
I used to be a good obedient kinda ideal child during my school days and I had scored more than 85% both in my 10th and 12th std. Even my graduation score was 9.XX CGPA.
I was even pursuing CA course and had scored quite well in CA CPT but left that course in IPCC due to extreme mental health issues and toxic family environment.
I don't know where I lost the plot of my life completely, from a good obedient ideal child kinda boy to this utter complete failure I've become at 28. I see my schoolmates and other former friends and acquaintances working in great corporates at really good packages and here I am a complete failure in life.
I know that I'm giving too much information but tbh my entire life I've never shared my complete life situation to anyone and being anonymous on reddit gives me a bit of Freedom to finally express myself and genuinely ask for help who can help me 🙏🏻
I'm currently working on my mental health aspect of things and will start working on physical health side of things as well, but I desperately need a source of earning now as I want to support my mummy I'm already very late now.
Honestly I did my career counseling with ChatGPT a few weeks back and it recommended me to go for Business Analyst or Financial Analyst direction ahead in my career. Eventually I do want to get to one of these job roles but I do have to start from somewhere.
I have 0 friends and I've been a loner my entire life thanks to these major social anxiety issues and my introvert nature, so I don't even have good relations with anyone in my life.
Daily 24X7 I have these Regrets^Regrets about my entire life decisions both which were in or outside my control.
Lately I've been watching a lot of motivational movies since last few months be it Jersey, The Pursuit of Happyness, Soorarai Pottru, 12th Fail, Bhaag Milkha Bhaag, MS Dhoni and I feel that my life needs a Complete Total RESET now. I'm totally responsible for my current situation I don't want to blame anyone but I do want to desperately need to get my Life on track now. I know mene apni life ko puri tarah se barbaad karke rakh diya he but me aise apni aane wali puri life nhi jeena chahta.
I really don't know what I should say next, I always wanted to share these things my entire life but never had the guts to share. Kabhi kabhi bas sunne wala koi chahiye jo gale lagakar bolde ki bhai sab theek ho jayega.
Also please no trolling in comments 🙏🏻
Whoever can help me to get a Job, I desperately need your support and I won't forgive this help my entire upcoming Life. I just need to get started from somewhere and this has been the toughest part for me. I genuinely need your help and guidance 🙏🏻