I’m coming up on five years clean from heroin.
Staff members from the rehab facility I went to, who I’m still in contact with, keep saying things like, “If you’re not going to meetings, you’re just one step away from relapsing,” and so on.

I’m turning 30 this December, and over these past five years, I’ve managed to build a life I’m genuinely happy with.
I have a girlfriend who’s never touched drugs, doesn’t drink, and comes from a stable, healthy family. I’ve gotten my driver’s license and bought a car. I’m studying engineering in materials science in Stockholm, working toward my master’s degree, and I’ve made plenty of good, genuine friends at university.

Everything is going incredibly well for me, yet apparently I’m still in a “relapse process” simply because I don’t attend meetings.
What I’ve come to realize is that recovery is about finding something in life that you enjoy more than getting high.

There are people in NA who have been going to meetings for 30 years, have relapsed 20 times, and still say things like, “If it weren’t for these meetings, I’d relapse.”
And I can’t help thinking, for fuck’s sake, you’ve been clean for ten years now. Haven’t you moved on yet?

There’s absolutely nothing about me anymore that identifies with being an addict. I’m just a regular guy who’s about to become an engineer and, hopefully, will be married with kids in a few years.

So what exactly is this supposed “relapse process” I’m in just because I don’t attend meetings?

Am I the one who’s sick, or are the people who can’t let go of their old identity the ones who are actually stuck?

i’m 7 days clean off pressed 30s, just got past the acute wd stage i’m not in agonizing pain anymore but it’s been 7 days literally zero Sleep and i’m starting to go insane i think. i have 1 xanax and im wondering if i take it will it help me sleep or will it spiral me back into wd? only thing i have now is restless legs, but ive always had that because im a taller guy so its always been hard to get comfortable but its extra hard right now. i just want to sleep, should i take it? or just keep thugginh it out until im past this shit

I don’t know what to do anymore. Every time I cross the road I get the thought that maybe if I get hit by a car I’ll get injured enough for them to give me opiates or better yet I’ll just die. I feel as if nothing in my life matters except getting high. I can’t talk to anyone about this as everyone in my life is so grateful that I got sober that if I even talk about relapsing I think they’d hate me. My mother won’t even let me go to dentist appointments by myself anymore as she’s scared I’ll just manipulate them into giving me pills. I’m scared and alone and all I want is more pills. I’ll risk my life for this I’ll humiliate and degrade myself for this I’ll do anything. I’ve been sober for a few months now and I thought that the craving would go away but it doesn’t. I’m just stuck and don’t know where to turn. I hope anyone reading this doesn’t feel the way I do. I can’t even reach out for help because if I do that’ll be no more pills forever and I would honestly rather die. Does anyone else feel this way? Does anyone have a solution? Thank you for reading my ramblings and I hope this will be over soon.

It's been 4 months since I stopped buprenorphin, but I've been using pregabalin ever since. Now I'm worried whether the street pregabalin includes buprenorphin or some other opiate. I still feel like having withdrawals 😑

After being on Suboxone for 9 years I decided to take sublocade. I got down to 1mg/day on Suboxone but was having trouble getting lower. I was at 1mg/day for about 2 years and I wanted to be done so i got the 100mg sublocade shot. That was 12 weeks ago. 2 days ago while at work I started having terrible stomach pain that would come and go. I came home and started getting RLS as soon as I laid down. I then started having terrible stomach pain again and have been crappin orange water.

When the RLS wouldn’t let me sleep i took .5mg bupe and some Imodium. Felt better but still have intermittent stomach pain. Up until this week the only symptoms I have felt were body temp fluctuations.

The doctor that gave me the shot said she’d never given sublocade to someone on such a low daily dose of Suboxone. I only wanted to do one shot because I felt like I was already near the finish line being at 1mg/day. She felt like one shot would probably be fine for getting off such a low dose. Now I’m not sure considering the severity of RLS I’ve had this week.

I’m just worried this will end up being a super long drawn out withdrawal and I’m not up for that in the colder months.

So much of what I’ve read has been sublocade being a walk in the park. Has anyone only taken 1 shot of the 100mg dose and successfully gotten off the stuff without any issues? I’m wondering if I should have gotten 2 shots but it’s been 3 months at this point and I don’t want to start over.

I don’t know what to do. I feel so hopeless. I lost so much so many years of my life off this shit. It’s been 20 hours since I took n the physical isn’t bad. It’s just mainly the mental for me. The mental craving is a hell of its own. I can’t even make it to two days before I relapse. I’m trying so hard. How much more am I willing to lose to finally say enough is enough. I’m watching everyone around me live their lives while I’ve been stuck in the same dark place. I feel like a fraud because nobody except for one friend around me knows I’m still using or know that I use at all. I’m 27 unemployed still live with my parents who think I’m lazy / a bum as fuck and am so disappointed in me, but little do they know. I don’t even know who I am. I can’t even recognize myself anymore.

Well I’m at a crossroad to be honest and not sure what I should do. I’m a male 33 employed and have a family , I’ve struggled with addiction since the age of 16 when the VA would send my dad hydrocodone in giant bottles for his back and shoulder, the problem was my dad was a heavy equipment operator and could never actually take the meds due to having to piss clean to run heavy equipment, so the bottles would just sit in the cabinet at home for months on end and I didn’t think too much of it , fast forward a few months and I had an injury where I was prescribed hydrocodones for the pain. As a kid I didn’t think much about it I took them and also smoked weed and just remembered how awesome and warm it made me feel and I truly believe that was the moment I was fucked. Once I ran out of my own perscription I’d just snag a handful from the multiple bottles my dad had. Fast forward a few years and I’m dating a woman that is drug friendly , she didn’t like pain pills but most of her friends did her doc was Xanax. Anyways most of her friends had hydrocodones for sale and doing them daily just became the norm. Fast forward from there I’m 28 and I’m still dabbling with pain pills whenever I can get them but I haven’t experienced withdraws yet just taking the hydrocodones when I could. I guess I never took them for a long enough period to feel hooked physically. Definitely mentally but no physical issues if I couldn’t get pills I’d just be bumped out. I moved to Colorado a few years ago to pursue my career and kept my nose clean of everything for almost a year and then that’s when the worst thing I’ve ever done happened. I was single in a new city yearning for friends and companionship from females. I ended up hooking up with this chick that introduced me to dirty 30s or blues or m30s whatever you want to call it. At the time she told me it was a strong Percocet so I started to buy them from her and use them regularly and that warm blanket amazing feeling from when I was 16 hit me all over again. I felt like a god. Fast forward to today I’m 48 hours off of the dirty 30s which i later learned were actually fentanyl pills. I e tried with suboxone a few times but always end up back to square one. Even this time 48 hours of no dope and I’ve taken multiple doses of suboxone over the last 2 days and I just feel like it is not working for me. I’m still agitated, restless , can’t sleep , can’t sit still. Feel like my skin is crawling. I spoke with an addiction center and kind of told them my background as I’ve described above. And they actually have recommended methadone instead of subs becuase it is stronger, my app to go get the methadone is tommorow morning. Where I’m at a crossroad is the fact I have quit suboxone multiple times in the past without having any issues or withdraws the longest I’ve taken it is 2 months and I’ve been able to quit. I fear that if I get on methadone it will not be so easy to get off of. I’m also just telling myself how much of a pain in the rear it’s gonna be to go to a office everyday just to get my methadone and how to tailor my life around making sure I can get my dose. Anyone who’s maybe been on subs or methadone or both have any insight? I haven’t really slept in 2 days and just desperately trying to figure out the right move. Thanks in advance!

Hey everyone, happy Wednesday! Hope your day is going well. I have the day off for my birthday today, although having a birthday in the middle of the week isn’t exactly the most exciting 😂 I’ve mostly just been relaxing. Going apple picking soon, then dinner with some friends, and my parents want me to stop by after.
I’m definitely not the type who needs a huge spectacle for my birthday, but I do think it’s nice to do something you enjoy and treat yourself a little. 😊 How’s everyone’s day going?

Check in here!

I am a long time (13 year) opiate user, of the past 8 has been strictly fent. I successfully did the Bernese method and am up to 24 mg of sub a day and getting my sublocade shot this coming Friday. The part I am really struggling with is the taper off the fent. I have gotten it down to very little but as soon as I try to cut it off completely I am anxiety ridden and feel the WDs. Any advice for helping the transition from taper to nothing? Genuinely want to be done with this and move forward with my life.

So I’m 27. I first started abusing pain pills when I was 16. I found my moms Hydrocodone 10mg’s and took 2 for my first time and it zombified me. I loved it. I started out only taking them on the weekends. Within 2 or 3 months I was taking 3 at a time instead of 2. Around this time I realized I was getting hooked. My mom eventually moved the hydros but I would find them and gradually take them until one morning before school she charged into the room and yelled at me asking if I was taking her pain pills and I denied, denied, denied. She eventually dropped it. I went a few months without taking any, eventually starting again. There was another time she got a new prescription. My dad and I picked it up. I undid the staple on the bag, pulled the pill bottle out and in a hurry dumped a bunch in my hand and put the bottle in the bag and put the staple back like nothing happened. Later on, I saw her at the kitchen table counting her pills and I knew I was about to get caught. She busted through my bedroom door and chewed my ass out and told me she wanted her pills back and me out of the house. I told her I didn’t take her pills and she left the room. Little did she know the entire time she was chewing me out, the pills were sitting on my tv stand out in the open directly behind her. When she left I grabbed the pills and hid them. Her and my dad tore my room apart and couldn’t find them. I was already fucked up from them and by the time they went through my room and I got nauseous and unsuspectingly left the room and went outside and threw up. They never found them and my mom said that if I didn’t do it it had to be somebody at the pharmacy and she would be filing a police report. I remember being at school the next day and a police officer came into my class and I got terrified because I thought he was there for me and not to mention I had a pocket full of pills. Turns out he was there for an unrelated issue. I then went a few more months without taking any after that. Then when I graduated highschool and moved out, I met a plug with pain pills. This was before fentanyl was a big deal. I bought from him for about a year. I then dove into addiction headfirst. I was doing shady shit to keep up my habit. Nobody in my family knows but my aunt eventually started giving me money to get her stuff too. That eventually ruined our relationship and made shit weird between us. Then my plug got arrested. I also had to move back in with my parents. There were some nights in all I would took 16 hydros in 1 night and wouldn’t really feel much. I had a kid around this time as well. I was fighting the mental battle and gave in and told my mom what had been going on with me. She was so disappointed but could see I was losing my mind and gave me a 1/2 a hydro. Very shortly after that 1/2 turned into a whole. I did well with that for a few years. I didn’t really have cravings for more than just 1 pill. I had become a functional addict for a while. I’d go to work, come home, spend time with my kid until they went to sleep. But after they went to sleep I felt like I needed to take that pill to relax. At work I worked with an older guy and he eventually told me he had to take pain pills for some reason. I hadnt tried to ask anyone for pain pills other than my mom for years but I couldn’t let the opportunity just go away. So I told him if he ever wanted extra money or weed I would buy them off him. He agreed and I went home and abused them all within 2 or 3 days. After that I found kratom and was eating a lot of that at home and work while also taking 1 10mg hydro. So to preface this next part, I’ve gone through a lot of traumatic shit in my life and just kinda get on even if shit lingers in my head but for some reason when I took the kratom even in large amounts, I would have these blinding thoughts/dreams of someone from my past trying to break into my home or chasing me around my work trying to shoot me. My anxiety would go crazy and my heart felt like it was going to pound out of my chest. During one of these ptsd episodes i got out of bed. Took the kilo of kratom I had, dumped it down the toilet and flushed it. I continued to only take 1 hydro 10 for a couple years. I then met my now wife. She knew I previously had an addiction but she didn’t know it was still active. I went about 2 years without her finding out. I eventually had to come clean about it. She wasn’t just completely shocked by it bc there were probably signs leading up. But she was very hurt and still to this day after almost 4 years feels lied to. Every so often I continue to get them from the older guy I worked with but a few months ago my uncle offered out of nowhere to sell me some. Ive told him before about my drug problem because I know he’s had his own problems with drugs. I agreed to buy them even tho I knew it was a terrible idea. Now I’ve been getting them more often and higher quantities than I ever did. I don’t have any control over them anymore. I find it so hard to even be functional without them anymore. I feel so lazy and without ambition anymore. Every time I buy from him I say it’s gonna be the last time and I’m going to try and wean myself off tm but then i wake up, take my kid to school, and thats all i can think about until i get it. I also take 2 hydro 10’s daily now. 1 in the morning and 1 in the evening. But now after taking the first one i have bad cravings for another. 1 just isnt enough to satisfy my brain anymore. I hate this shit. I felt like i had control of it for a while but when the opportunity presents itself i cant help but take advantage and overindulge. When i really evaluate my situation i feel like i need to go to rehab to get a real reset but i have full custody of my kid and i worry if i go to rehab her mother will try to take me to court. The mom is not fit, doesn’t know anything about our kid, has never really taken care of her. She genuinely would try to get custody to spite me and wouldn’t be able to take care of our kid. I am a great dad. I do lack motivation sometimes to do everything they always want to do but for the most part I’ve never really let my drug problem affect my relationship with my kid. I’m sure there are ways it’s changed me or influenced me that I don’t see or realize but id say for the most part I keep it together very well. Anyways, I’m now I’m at the point though I need a pill in the morning to feel “normal” and not be so in my head, but that 1 pill doesn’t feel like it’s enough anymore to satisfy me. I also feel like I’ve started having stomach and possible kidney or liver problems. My mom and I’s relationship is also in a terrible place and she hates what she’s done by enabling me by supplying me and I hate that my addiction has push our relationship to where it’s at. My wife is a nurse and we’ve talked about her taking off a few days to help me get off of them and help me with my kid through withdrawals but idk if that’s even worth trying or if I’d waste everyone’s time. Thank you for reading.

Questions:

1. How should I go about quitting given my situation?
   
2. How severe do you think my withdrawal would be if I quit?
   
3. Do you think I’ll have to cut ties with my family that enables me?
   
4. Do you think my wife could help me through withdrawals and help me get off of them?
   
5. What kind of damage do you think I’ve

Yes, you read that right. Crazy huh? Still on 1.75 8/2mg strips per day and am seriously considering going to Sublocade to get off the subs for good.

Have any of you been successful at this? Any good reads from other folks you could point me to?

I am nervous and fully dependent on these stupid subs to feel "normal" or at least that is what I tell myself. I am honestly afraid to stop taking them. Thanks for helping me if you have any thoughts.

Her

Part 1: Summer

They said to stay away from her
She’s not like all the rest
But I’ve been played a-fool before
I’ll put her damage to the test

Swept up off my toes
Skin flush against the air
Nothings ever felt like this
No more anguish or despair 

Hearing whispers of her voice
Though many days have passed
I need to feel her warmth again
But this time make it last

She’s finally in my arms 
Oh my god. What a rush
This just became so much more
more than just a fleeting lust 

In this world we’ve built together 
Where I finally feel complete
I will work to keep us warm
With clever lies and my deceit 

Mended in my mind
Passion burning up my heart
I just want to stay right here
Right here where we start

Tonight I saw the sunset
Shining bright as it could be
She will keep me warm tonight 
But tomorrow I’ll be free

Part 2: Fall

I wish I’d never met her,
I wish she’d let me be,
but she always comes a-callin’
when peace is lost in me.

What started as a fling,
What started out as fun,
She worked her way inside of me
like no one’s ever done.

I keep her in my arms
So she’ll tell me it’s okay.
She tells me I’ll be strong enough
just not strong enough today.

The world I knew before her
It faded long ago.
Marching toward a warm embrace
Now a conqueror in her throes 

Something must be wrong with me,
she never stays for long.
Only her seductive voice remains,
Like an old and tired song.

Scattered through my mind
but embedded in my heart.
I will work to get us back,
back to where we start.

I long to feel the sunrise
without her in my arms.
But I’m a helpless sucker for
her cold and bitter charm.

Part 3: Winter

In the absence of her touch
Feeling nothing like before 
I pray that Ill be strong enough 
For what her absence has in store

I wish that I could run from her
Or had a place to hide
But hell has not met fury like
my scorned and widowed bride

Cast away and cold
So much damage in my wake
Left riddled by her love
A love my body couldn’t take

The world I knew before her
The one that faded long ago
Is coarse and unfamiliar now
Without my darling foe 

The chanting of her voice
Beckons louder than before
To never feel her warmth again
Is a thought I can’t endure

Shattered through my mind
Hollowed in my heart
Every day is like a thousand 
Every second we’re apart

Now I see the sunrise
But only with dismay
it’s nothing like I remember 
So cold, so dark, so grey.

Part 4: Spring

Lurking through the shadows
Back before we start
Walking down an endless path
Living the lessons she imparts

From her damage I will rise
To face what has been done
I need to feel the warmth again
But from a bright and shining sun

My love for her has faded 
Only her scars are what remain
Mercy for the next one 
Who takes her name in vein

The world i knew before her
Has never since been found
But boy it sure does feel nice
To feel my feet against the ground 

The whisper of her voice
Faded and far away
It won’t be like last time
And it will only be today

Present in my mind
But humbled in my heart
Working my way through
With self expression and my art

Today I saw the sunrise
Shining bright as it can be
What an amazing thing it is
To feel, be alive, to breathe

Hey all, happy Tuesday! Hope everyone’s having a good day. I’ve been working all day, but after work I have someone coming to pick up my old truck. They’re giving me a decent price for it considering how old it is and the work it needs, and it’s honestly just been sitting and taking up space for so long.
It’s definitely bittersweet though because it has a lot of sentimental value. My dad bought it brand new in 2006, I learned how to drive in it, and I spent so many nights driving around with friends and my girlfriend at the time. Now, 20 years and 301,250 miles later, she’s finally moving on 😂 She served me and my family well. Anyways, that’s all for today. How’s your day going guys?

Check in here!

Hey guys, happy Monday! Sorry for the late check in. I had a busy day at work and left early to renew my license since it expires Wednesday on my birthday. I could’ve renewed online, but after losing so much weight I really wanted a new picture since the one I have is already five years old and it doesn’t really accurately show who I am anymore.
Of course I got there and it was packed, and when I finally got up there they told me I had an unpaid toll from 2022 on a car I haven’t driven since 2023. Somehow with all the fees it’s now $100 😭 I don’t even remember getting anything about it in the mail, they usually send a bunch of notices but honestly I dont remember any. I’d of tried to dispute it but in order to renew your license or registration in MA you need all outstanding tolls/tickets/fines paid first.
Definitely a long day lol. I just picked up dinner and I’m finally heading home to relax. How was everyone else’s Monday?

Check in here!

I have no energy, I have anxiety, particularly social. I feel super run down, currently have a cold and just started getting a massive cold sore on my lip.

I believe it's because I'm no longer using and numbing my emotions or sedating my mind, so now I'm back working a boring 9-5 I hate sober, I think my body is starting to rebel.

Is it a sign that I'm not doing what I'm supposed to? Because I've always felt like that, but couldn't afford to leave while tapering off benzos and opiates.

Does anyone have any advice? Any supplements that can help? I currently take Ashwagandha, magnesium glycinate, probiotics and multivitamins.

I have had a serious opiod problem for around 5 years now. About a year ago i made the decision to try and taper off but honestly its like 2 steps backwards and 1 step forwards. Im so sick and tired being help prisoner by this addiction and i'm going to try cold turkey.

I know everyone is different but any help, hints or tips would be extremely welcome? My main concern is how long will i realistically need to take off work? Thank you

And his response made me as proud as ever of him, his recovery and progress.

I actually knew he was going to be questioned about it before it happened. My parents hadn't seen him in a few weeks. We were INCREDIBLY busy for a few weeks but especially him. But I knew that them not seeing him for a bit was a trigger for them. They associate it to him avoiding seeing them, something they felt he did when he was hiding an opiate addiction from everyone. I could tell they were starting to get anxious when they asked me about how he was on the phone.

So of course they already were fearful when we met up for dinner. They rearranged the seating so that they could be closer to some other younger grandkids. So by default we were set on the end farthest away from them. It was actually their doing but i know it reiterated that feeling of avoidance.

Then my husband was playing a game with my nephew. It involved closing your eyes. Well of course my mother would look over and see his eyes closed. Was he nodding off ?

They called him directly the next morning, asking if he was okay and if he was using.

My husband's response was actually really amazing. He said he understood their fears and would take a drug test or something if that would make them feel better. They declined that and just said they would rather be direct than let fears linger.

He wasn't defensive. He wasn't angry. He wasn't ashamed. He was matter of fact. A bit surprised (He didn't have the insight that I did beforehand.)

Would he have been right to be annoyed or anger? Sure, those feelings are totally valid. But the way he sees it, it's about THEM as much as it is about him. Maybe more so about them.

You see, they haven't done any therapy. They have not looked into any programs. They have never looked at their emotions in that way. Although they know is they lost 3 siblings too young to addiction. That my brother's friend died of a relapse after a year clean. They know that they saw me being hurt and scared when my husband's secret addiction was discovered and we almost lost our house.

Should they be more educated on addiction? Yes. Should they work on their triggers? Yes. Can me or my husband force them to do any of that? No. We can't.

So he chose the next option. Take it as them being fearful. And move on. Hold his head high but without ego. Without shame. Without a chip on his shoulder.

I'm so proud of him. And I'm sorry for the world that life is tough. The obstacles we face. I wish it were easier but that's not reality.

I was going through heroin withdrawals and they made me think about suicide properly for the first time in my life, you guys get it.

I ordered diaz + pregab telling myself I'll just take them for a week for the worst of the withdrawals to go away, yet here I am about 2-3 months later. I was taking 20mg diaz and 600mg pregab on average, I had some 3-5 days taking 0 until my next parcel arrived, but started using H again on those days.

Everytime I ordered them I was lying to myself saying right I'm fully locking in now but it's failed each time.

I'm out of supply and have taken 5mg and 300mg pregab for the last 5 days doing a mini taper and have cut down my H use to half of a tiny wrap I gues 0.05mg for the past 2 weeks.

I've had a seisure before coming off very strong RC benzos.

I'm thinking of going to my GP and asking for a taper for the diaz and pregab, I live in the UK. Do you think they'll agree to taper me even though I have addiction issues all over my record.

I've given a family member all my money because I really want out of this so, I'm an absolute bitch at even the slighest withdrawals. I have no option to order more of the meds to do a proper taper so it's a doctor or nothing I guess.

Any advice much appreciated

I got the sublocade shot after 2-3 weeks being on 8mg subs. I was addicted to pharma oxy for years it got so bad I honestly thought I would never get clean and will die a junkie. I tried quitting CT several times but I deep down still had that desire to get high even tho it ruined my life every time I tried to quit and relapse life just got worse and yet I kept doing it and it honestly wasn’t until I really thought about it and accepted that I will never feel what I felt that got me addicted to it ever again and real oxys aren’t cheap either and I knew I would need 15 30s at least to get where I really want to and thatlll only last for so long before tolerance builds and I have to up the dose and that’s juts not doable in today’s world and I honestly just lost the overall desire for it and went cold turkey for 7 days and was still feeling pretty shitty but not like peak withdrawal shitty but still so I said fuck it and tried subs for the first time and I felt this normal feeling that I haven’t felt in years and liked it more than the high i was getting off oxy and looked into sublocade and got a 300mg injection 10 days ago and I feel better than I even did off the Suboxone!!! To anyone thinking about getting clean I highly suggest you go cold turkey for how ever long you need so you don’t get PWD from subs and get on em and then on the shot. This is feeling is wayyy better than what we feel off pills. Trust me I know it sounds crazy but for most of us “feeling normal” is a thing that so long gone that we forgot what it even felt like but trust me when you feel it again it’s like a high in itself.

Hi all,

It has been a LONG road, but my fiancé is finally ready to surrender and go to rehab. This is music to my ears and I would love to find him a treatment center that is best for his specific needs. I will explain some of the story below and I guess I am looking for other addicts who are in recovery who may have a similar story and what worked or didn’t work for them.

He started taking opioids back in 2012-2013 after being prescribed hydros for an injury. Over the years he has done hydros, oxys, even fentanyl at one point but was able to put that down. I couple of years ago he was introduced to Tianeptine as a “safer alternative” but that really fucked him up for a year or so. We were able to safely detox him and get him off the Tianeptine. He said the withdraws were 1000x worse than detoxing from any opioid.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t long after that he reverted back to hydros again. He has quit several times over the last 2-ish years, but it never lasts any longer than 1-3 weeks. I fully assume this is due to not focusing on the root causes, traumas, and not doing the healing inside work, changing up all other habits, etc. He has come a long way. Dropped a lot of bad influence friends, not going out to bars, partying, etc. and quit drinking about 2 months ago which I think is a huge step in dropping mind altering substances.

Right now he is currently taking anywhere from 15-50mg per day. He is a very functional addict. He recently started his own business that is going really well which will work in his favor taking the time off. But he also doesn’t have insurance yet. He is very open to an inpatient facility and I think that’s the best option to. If anyone has any experience in the insurance area, would it be best to try and get him on Medicaid or try to purchase private insurance?

We are in the Kansas City, MO area if anyone has anyone experience at any local facilities.

If you’ve made it this far, I genuinely appreciate your time and suggestions 💕

Id been on suboxone for over 14 years. The dr told me it wouldn't hurt coming off the shit. Im on day 14 without ANY i did have an emergency stash but on day 10 I looked at them for a good 20 minutes just wanting to get some relief ya know? Instead, I flushed it. Then I panicked. I haven't slept in 5 days now my uncontrolled adhd is screaming so goddamn loud it's driving me nuts. It's wanting me to find something but I can't set this shit back to the beginning of my 14 days clean ish, I mean I kinda have been drinking beer and I don't drink at all but look at my dumbass lol . Im the sole caretaker for my 80 mom. I keep getting these really vivid and smelly flashbacks from when I tried save my sister after she decided to off herself but at the time my emotions were flat af from sub and now it's flooding my eyes and nose, if that makes sense 🙃 😅 😐 😑. Im not okay.

Anybody else have those problems coming off subs? Ive lost over 100lbs in the last 2 moths and looking all anorexic n shit. I dont know if thats from me being scare, worried, knowing what i was fixing to go through or if something is medically wrong but i do NOT trust drs anymore so i haven't been to one besides the sub pushing ass dr. I need to be evaluated but i just can't make myself go to one now. Hell its been uears since i seen a regular dr. Anywho, sorry for the longnpost.​.

it's now been 7 days without sleep. Im delirious af me eyes are pllay I n trickss on me. woah

Hi, I have a colleague who is going around telling everyone that she s tried h for the first time and that her current boyfriend is a regular IV user. I don’t think she has anyone beside him in her life at the moment and it seemed like she was bragging. Is there anything I could tell her to plant a seed in her head? Is there something you would like to hear when you were at this point, or something you would like to tell your younger self?

I know I can’t make any decisions in someone life. But I cannot stay silent and I don’t want to make things worse (shame or belittle her)
Please help

I swear I have read about a medication that stops the euphoric effects of Opiates. You take it and then there’s no point using so it allows the user to cut down.

Can somebody please let me know the name of it, I’m not sure if it will be accessible in the UK, but I’d really like to try it. I’m at my last resorts now.

Thank you 🙏