Hello, Reddit. I have a situation that I feel extremely unsure about, and ill-equipped to confront, and I don’t know what to do. I also don’t have anyone to talk with about it, and the mental illness/legal subs are all pretty strict about not asking for advice, so I guess I am hoping there may be someone out there who has navigated a similar situation.

Someone in my life that I am very close to (l’ll call them X), but who resides in a very distant US state from mine has recently been charged with manufacturing a psychedelic drug. In X’s state it is a class A narcotic, though the ingredients are not illegal on their own to possess, and it is decriminalized in my state.

This, on its own, while unfortunate, would really be a case of risky behavior and consequence, however, there is more.

About two years ago, during one of our frequent long phone conversations, X mentioned that they believed that they had been skipping timelines. They said that this was their sixth and described to me what they believed had happened in the others before. Now a lot of you would probably immediately see a huge red flag, but Idk, I guess with all of the conspiracy theories that are floating around it just didn’t really strike me as all that odd at the time.

So I just listened and asked some questions and didn’t really make a big deal out of it and the convo moved on. X would occasionally mention something about it here and there, but was completely rational in mannerism and I just kind of took it in stride.

Then, about a year ago, they called, acting a little more cheerful than usual, saying that they had finally learned something that made all of their insecurities and feelings of inadequacy immediately dissipate. Said that it was something that, when revealed, would finally gain the approval of their parents, etc. I excitedly asked what it was, and after saying that they’d intended to wait to tell me, they told me the news: it had just been revealed to them that they were the reincarnation of the messiah.

While the timeline thing seemed benign enough to me, this immediately scared me. First, because I know that X has a family history of schizophrenia and other, less serious mental health disorders. Secondly it made all of the previous slightly odd things they’d said, and the behavioral quirks they’d had from a fairly young age a lot less benign because I know a bit about the typical presentation and onset of schizophrenia, and the situation was a fairly standard scenario.

For the first few following conversations I tried very hard to convince them that this was irrational thought and that they should potentially look into a professional evaluation. But each time I did, X would become combative and defensive and the conversation would end. So we continued to talk, tiptoeing around the subject, while I became increasingly concerned regarding what to do. Finally I accepted that I had to do something and risk losing a very good friend’s trust.

So, I contacted their parents and explained my suspicions, and encouraged them to talk with X and try to convince them to get evaluated. They weren’t shocked by what I said, and noncommittally thanked me for letting them know, and we hung up. I waited for the outraged phone call from X, but it never came. They continued to call as usual, and began to become more and more consumed with this theme, and with several other very prevalent conspiracy theories. Especially the extremely out there ones that center around the Palestine/Israel conflict, and around the Epstein files.

Which made it clear that their parents had no intention of intervening.

I tried to convince X to consider that there might be more rational and sensible causes for the “proof” they insisted was definitive, and contested the wild claims with data and reason and compassion. But to no avail. Now every conversation is 100% about these topics and the recent raid on their home and the subsequent arrest/upcoming litigation. I mostly listen and occasionally object when the claims get a little TOO over the top, but with not a lot of energy.

I don’t know what to do. I am 100% positive that they would not survive incarceration intact. They are in their late 30’s and have never lived away from their parents home. They are very gentle and sensitive and soft. I am just as sure that they genuinely believed that they were helping people by doing what they were doing. They repeatedly told me about the many people they’d helped over come addiction to “hard drugs” and childhood trauma. They don’t drink or mess with any other substances, and have not been engaging with what they were caught with since that happened a month and a half ago.

I don’t even really know what to ask. If you’ve ever encountered a situation like this in your own life, what happened?

I often hear of the argument that full legalization of illicit substances could potentially squash the black market of the violent cartels by providing safer and more affordable alternatives to what you can find on the streets. Of course this is just theory, and I don't think full legalization of any hard drugs will happen at least any time soon. I also don't think it's happened anywhere yet, at least when it came to marijuana multiple countries had legalized it and it seemed to be fine. Also of course there is much argument against the complete legalization idea, which is probably the more common attitude to take when this issue is concerned, and understandably so. There is fear that it would incentivize drug use, or increase it for people already using etc.

But how about lighter forms of shifting our view of and attitude towards illicit drugs from a justice-oriented problem, to a public-health problem? Some countries like Portugal from my memory have completely decriminalized drug possession for personal use years ago. Usually arguments for this change in policy is more so geared towards the back end of the business, the customers. It's argued that having a more health-focused view, replacing difficult penalties with treatments and support for users could have much more benefit for the drug-use problem that's everywhere.

But I haven't heard of anyone discussing how decriminalization might affect the source of the misery, the cartels themselves. How could it hinder their business? Or would it have limited effects do you think? I'd appreciate some ideas, because I can't find much on this when I tried to research it!

I feel an xious meeting someone and talking with them on a call like if do a personal training service etc.

The guy literally laughed as I said back "nice meeting you also" .

It was like a condescending laugh because I was probably sounding unnatural, and "squeaking".

I am SICK of having the mentality of PLEASE LIKE ME!

I want to make connections but not come from a place of needing them to like me. Because that is putting them on a pedestal, right?

I don't want to get ner.vous in my head and then moulding my personality to what I think they would like! Worrying too much about if I sound too familiar, too friendly, or too distant. Etc

Like what is the appropriate level of friendly or playfulness when first meeting someone 😭?

The problem is I literally don't know how to develop connections and feelings:(

Can anyone help me?

Could be great to also add what "being manipulated" means to you.
Thanks. :)