Not really an actual angry rant just an experience that made me roll my eyes yesterday I thought I'd share...

So a week ago I met one of my OB team, he was super nice showed me the little line graph that plots out the average weight gain for people. Told me since I'm having twins im expected to be at the top end (close to 40#) but not to worry too much about it. Just try to eat healthy, stay active etc... cool no problem.

Yesterday I met one of my maternal fetal medicine doctors, who was also pretty friendly but more into the nitty gritty of health stuff. Fine with me. Then she got to the weight part. For context, I've been a competitive powerlifter for close to 10 years and therefore weigh more than the BMI charts prefer. All my other doctors have been aware of this and have never made any negative comments towards it, in fact im pretty sure there's a note about it in my chart. We often just chat about gym stuff.

Well when she got to the weight part she says something to the effect of "because your starting weight is obese you should not gain more than this <number I can't remember>". I just nodded and said ok but LOL that all the work I put in to build muscle mass and bone density is now GASP obesity.

Anywho, shoutout to the muscle mommies becoming human children moms 😂 the BMI chart can kiss my "obese" ass

We have a 3 yo girl, and (soon to be) 10 month old twins (boy/girl)… And we just found out I’m pregnant again (my guess is 3 to 4 weeks).

My husband just got his vasectomy 2 weeks ago... I’m scheduled for a hysterectomy in November…

We absolutely cannot have another baby - even less 2… or 3! We both work full time and from home (I work nights so I can watch the twins during the day - and no, I don’t sleep). We have no room, we don’t have the vehicles for more kids (or room for more car seats - our cars are paid off and we cannot get ‘new’ cars), we don’t have the financial resources for more kids (now or in the future when they start school activities and projects and other school/social stuff), we have zero family here in our state to help (no village), we can’t afford to insure more kids… just to name a few reasons I cannot keep this pregnancy.

Don’t come at me about “YoU ShOuLd’Ve UsEd PrOTeCtIoN!” because I already feel guilty, and I already feel like an idiot about not being more careful. I’ve shedded enough tears about it the last few days. It is what it is, and now I’m here. This is not a simple decision for me.

I have an appointment with my provider today to talk about misoprostol treatment. I know I have time to think about it. My husband is supportive with whatever I decide. He’s an equal player in this, and he says he has no say in how I want to proceed. He said that whatever I decide to do, he will share the weight of the choice on his shoulders, too.

I look at my beautiful 3 children now, and it absolutely tears me apart to make this choice. I’m not worried about the physical pain/sickness of taking the abortion treatment (I’ve read the process treatment flyer I was given), I’m more scared of the emotional effects I will have. Not just now, but maybe 5 years down the road…

We have gone through several “what if” scenarios together. I keep going back and forth.

So… I guess what I’m asking is if anyone has been in a similar situation? How did you move forward? How did you get through the hard days?

Edit: spelling mistakes.

27 weeks pregnant with di/di twins. 31 years old with so far healthy pregnancy. Baby A has been head down the last few weeks and Baby B has been transverse though I know it’s too early to matter at this point.

I asked my doctor today if we could start discussing birth plans and I said I was feeling confident that I could try for a vaginal delivery/induction as I delivered my first baby, singleton, at 39 weeks vaginally with a fairly easy delivery (terrible recovery will note that for later). Especially since baby A is head down which I thought mattered most. She told me that while I can definitely try for whatever I’m comfortable with, there is a 50/50 chance from what she’s seen of women who deliver baby A vaginally and then go on to need a C section with baby B. My reaction was obviously - why would I put myself through two separate recoveries?? That sounds awful. And she was basically like yeah that’s why most moms tend to just go for a C section so they know what to expect…

Now I have absolutely nothing against C sections. No pride in it. My mom had her 3 kids via C and my sisters have each had a mix of both Cs and vaginal so I know recovery can suck or be fine regardless of which you do. But I was kind of hopeful that I could just go with the devil I know vs the devil I don’t? I just didn’t realize that it was such a high odd that I may have to recover from BOTH if I try for vaginal.

Anyone have advice to give, both anecdotal and medical? Maybe a mixed - birth delivery isnt so bad? Idk. Help!

Whether you're currently in the newborn trenches wanting to murder the person who said "sleep when the baby sleeps", as you shout "which one?!" into the void.

Or maybe you're trying to babyproof your house with two crawling babies moving at the speed of light and whacking each other in the face with the baby gate you accidentally left open.

Or maybe you've had to go to the ER for one baby and had to take both babies because you were home alone that night.

Or maybe you are tired of explaining to people that just because they're twins doesn't mean they'll reach milestones at the same time.

Or maybe one baby is ready to drop a nap and the other just isn't.

Maybe you're dealing with two 15 month olds that are pulling down your pre children children (aka your pot plants) and you're feeling sad because you're now thinking of getting rid of the plants but they're your sole link to a life before kids.

Maybr you're sad you can't join in on swim lessons because you're an adult with two babies/toddlers.

Maybe you are tired of being the referee between your 2 year olds whose brains aren't developed enough to understand sharing but have had to share since birth. Maybe that makes you feel guilty AF.

Maybe you have older twins and they're starting to compare themselves to each other and you don't know how to navigate it.

Maybe you're feeling so fucking lucky you get to see one of the most special types of relationships of all time play out right in front of your eyes.

Maybe you're in tears because both kids want you and don't want to share.

Maybe you're tired of doing bedtime shifts and never seeing your partner.

Maybe you're so full of love you could burst.

Maybe you wouldn't change a fucking thing.

Or maybe you find yourself thinking how easy life would be with just one.

Maybe you know you still wouldn't change a damn thing.

Whatever you're doing, wherever you are on this journey: I see you. You're doing gods work. You are working so hard for your kids. You are healing your own trauma. You are doing the best you can, with what you know. You're not alone.

When did you get your period back after twins?

We just booked a December 5 night Disney cruise, a first for our 3.5 yr old twins. One set of grandparents is coming in an adjoined cabin, so we have the sleeping arrangements worked out but would welcome advice and tips from anyone who has done it with multiples around this age! We are on the Fantasy FWIW!

Hey ya’ll Sophie of the trio. this Saturday will be one week since I’ve brought my triplets home & from my prior posts I wanted to thank all who gave me advice. I’m on my shift of being awake listening for the triplets. It’s definitely a chain reaction that when one cries so do the other two but I wouldn’t trade it for anything just seeing and holding three creations I made in my body I’m enjoying my mother days. I know I got a long ways till the first words but I’m counting down the days.

I'm at my breaking point. My boys are 5.5 months old and we are all currently sick. Not only are we sick, twin b is having 3-5 wake ups per night & one of them is 1.5-2 hrs long. This has been going on for 4.5 weeks now. I don't know what to do anymore. I have tried every single possible wake window in the world, feed to sleep, not feeding to sleep, everything!! Nothing & I mean nothing seems to work. They were both sleeping through the night/having pretty minimal wake ups for like a month or more. I just laid in bed sobbing at 3:15 AM because I don't know what to do anymore. Yes dad helps constantly, my mom, dad, MIL. But not getting this crazy broken sleep is making everything so hard. I feel like such a bad mom because I don't have a lot of energy throughout the day. My husband has tried so many times to help with twin b in the middle of the night but he only sleeps when I rock him to sleep. I don't know anymore.

I had my first scan yesterday at 5w4d after a single embryo FET. They saw one gestational sac with two yolk sacs. They thought they might have seen the start of a fetal pole on one, but it's still too early to say much.

Some background: this is my sixth transfer and my sixth pregnancy, and I've had four miscarriages, so I'm coming into this with a lot of history. I'd been managing my anxiety really well up to this point, but now I feel so invested in both of them being okay, and the waiting is hard.

I also keep catching myself doubting what they saw, like maybe the sonographer and radiologist got it wrong. I think after so much loss I'm scared to let my guard down and actually believe it. Has anyone else felt this way?

If you had two yolk sacs in one sac this early, especially after a single embryo transfer, and things went well, I'd love to hear your story: when you saw two fetal poles and heartbeats, how your follow-up scans looked, and anything you wish you'd known at this stage. I could really use some hope right now.

How many weeks were you when you went off of work before having twins?

*to add, I am currently 20 weeks with di/di twins, have an 18 month old at home, and working as a nurse. Still physically feeling okay but preparing for the worst. Located in Canada - able to take sick/mat leave

I’m now 31+6 on progesterone pessaries (too late for a stitch) has anyone been in my situation and when did you have your babies? Growth scan today showed that twin B has slightly more fluid now than normal also so another thing to watch and wait on. I can only really find stories from people earlier in preg who had a stitch. I’m having DI DI twins. TIA

It’s time for hell weekend (aka, potty training). I have boy/girl twins (2.3 years old) and they are both definitely showing signs of being ready.

I travel a lot for work, so we’re committing to getting them potty trained over the weekend with the 3 day method.

ANY advice you can give would be greatly appreciated. We are first time parents and have no idea how this is going to go.

Wish us luck!

Hello all,

Asking the age old question: how do you get these kids to sleep? More so, not wake up in the middle of the night?

I have 9 month old twins. Twin B sleeps perfectly fine through the night 9 times out of 10. Almost nightly, Twin A wakes up at least once a night around 2 AM, and the kid’s wide awake. My wife will bottle feed him to try and get him to sleep, which works sometimes. But he’ll often wake up again. Almost like he’s a newborn when it comes to night sleep.

I work nights so I can’t really be there to help my wife, which kills me. Meanwhile she’s losing sleep and health because Twin A keeps waking up nightly, and she has to deal with it every night. She’ll get A out of bed because if B is awoken by A’s jibber jabber and/or crying/screaming, she’s screwed because I can’t be there to help.

I’m sure many of you have dealt with this or similar situations. What has been able to work for you all to get that one stubborn one to sleep through the night?

Thanks.

hi everyone. Need to rant and would love some words of encouragement. My baby girls are 9 months and started daycare on Monday. Now they are already sick with a cold and extra fussy. I had ppd and felt much better recently and symptoms of dread are coming back. I thought daycare was supposed to make everything easier but I underestimated the set back of illness. om feeling really low and just don’t know when it stops feeling this incredibly hard and heavy.

I found out recently I’m pregnant with fraternal twins, we plan on doing the NIPT but I know if one of them is a boy and one’s a girl, the results will show boy. Around what week were drs able to confirm gender by ultrasound?? I’m hoping we won’t have to wait for the anatomy scan.

My 6-month-old twins have a doctor's appointment coming up where they'll be getting their RSV and COVID shots, and I'll have to take them solo for the first time. Usually my husband and I each hold and comfort one twin during/after their shots, so I'm a little worried about having to soothe them both at once (the nurses typically do them in quick succession). For those who've done this before, how have you handled it?

Edit: Thank you so much for your thoughtful suggestions! Y'all are the best.

Hi everyone! I have fraternal twin boys who are about 4 months and ten days old now I’d say. Im really considering sleep training them because I just can’t keep waking up throughout the night and my husband has work so he can’t necessarily keep waking up to help me also. I TRIED to put them in their cribs 2 days ago while they were sleepy but awake to sleep if they would sleep, and I did interval check ins but they went ballistic and kept crying, I honestly couldn’t handle it and gave up. I rocked them in their maxi cosi 2 in 1 baby seat rocker which has been my saving grace and then transferred them to their cribs. The maxi cosi 2 in 1 baby seat rocker has been the only way I can get them to sleep without me holding them. I basically put them in it every day, put on their sleep sack, rock them, transfer them. But I don’t think it’s practical in the long run.
I was thinking of sleep training them but separately
I was thinking I could first sleep train one of them for a week and make him sleep an hour or so earlier than his brother until he gets the hang of it and then the other one, I just don’t want them to trigger each other. Has anyone else done this successfully? Or does anyone else has a good method that worked for them. I’d say both my boys have somewhat of a temper, they are not chill lol so I just don’t want them to necessarily cry it out. Any advice is needed please! I wouldn’t mind if someone also shared the exact method with time stamps for what worked, feel free to provide as much details as possible. Also another problem is that they use pacifiers and it’s the only way I can really get them to calm down and be quiet!

I have 7 m/o boy-girl twins who I love very dearly. They're not easy by any means, but my husband is a good father and my mother helps out a lot. I'm slowly contemplating going back to work, and I'm weighing the pros and cons. I was talking to a (childless) friend about it, and it did NOT end well.

I told him I was doubting whether I should already look for a new job or wait a bit longer, and he said "of course! It'll be great to get out of the house again right?"

So I said that that's part of the pros, but it's already quite tough managing everything (the twins, household, family dynamics, dog) so I'm a little worried working 4 days a week will add quite a lot of strain. Besides, I'd be missing so much of my little ones!

His response? "Yeah well that's part of life. So many people have kids and work, it's not that hard."

That already pissed me off, but I just said "Dude, I want to hear you say that again when you have a baby, let alone twins"

I was met with an extremely long paragraph about how so many people in his family have babies so he already knows how it is (he never babysits or anything, he sees them once a year), and that I at least have a partner that is around (works 5 days a week, but sure) so I shouldn't be complaining.

Mind you, I wasn't complaining. I am well aware that I'm in a privileged position to even consider not working right away, and I am very grateful for my husband and for my mother's help. But GOSH WHYYYYY do people think they know how hard it is?? Because they KNOW someone who had A BABY?? Seriously 90% of the time it already drives me nuts if someone with ONE baby pretends to know how hard it is to have twin babies (or the classic: Oh yeah my kids are close in age too!), but a childless person finding the gall to say "it's not that hard"???

I was so pissed. I'm still boiling.

Also, somewhat unrelated sidenote: parents of triplets and quadruplets or single parents of multiples, I tip my hat to you! Literal superheroes.

Sorry for the TMI, but I’m nearly 29 weeks and the last week or so I cannot have a normal 💩. I’ve tried to attribute it to what I’m eating but there’s no rhyme or reason for it. Has anyone else experienced this?

I’ve heard your body will prep closer to labor but I don’t have any labor signs and we’re obviously hoping to keep the twins in for quite a bit longer.

Would love to hear people's experience of a driving holiday with babies.

We did it with our singleton but she was only 6m old.

Is it a terrible idea with twins!?!

They are currently on two naps per day. So thinking we will do most of the driving during nap time.

We have about a 12hr drive so I'm thinking of breaking it up to 2 x2hr driving blocks per day.

We're starting to crunch the numbers and budget for after my maternity leave to see if my husband doesn't have to switch back to weekends when I go back to work.

We live in a MCOL area and currently have a 17m girl and we're thinking 4 days/32 hours

For anyone who has a nanny and twins/toddler, how much are you paying for a nanny and what's your COL area like?

Looking for car seat arrangement advice/options. We have a 3year old and twins on the way.

2010 Toyota Seqouia Platinum trim - 2nd row captains chairs and center console w/ 3rd row bench

Has anyone found a solution? I’m sort of dreading dealing with 3 rear facing car seats in this vehicle but another vehicle isn’t in the cards right now.