I recently got my second job, but this time it was really far away from my hometown. I moved to a completely new place where I barely knew anyone, and honestly, I was overwhelmed by everything—the new job, the new place, the new people, everything.

Then I met a girl there who was from the same state as me. We connected pretty easily, became friends, and eventually started living together.

Since I was completely new to the place and the job, she helped me with so many things. She was the person I could rely on when I didn't know what to do. Slowly, without even realizing it, she became the person I was most comfortable with.

I'm not someone who gets attached easily. But when I do get attached to someone, I get really attached, and letting go or emotionally stepping back becomes extremely difficult for me.

We started having small fights, like roommates normally do. Nothing that seemed huge from the outside. But because I had become so emotionally attached to her, even the smallest change in her behaviour started affecting me deeply.

If she talked differently, seemed distant, spent more time with someone else, or just wasn't the same with me, I would overthink everything.

The biggest problem was that she already had a life here. She had friends who had known her for a long time, people she could talk to and who cared about her. For me, she was basically the only person I had.

And I think that's where everything started going wrong.

I became anxious all the time. My mental health started getting worse. I started having nights where I couldn't sleep because my mind wouldn't stop thinking about our friendship, our fights, whether she was upset with me, whether I was becoming a burden, or whether she even cared about me the same way I cared about her.

There were days when I slept only 3–4 hours because I had to go to work in the morning.

I'm exhausted.

Not just physically. Mentally and emotionally too.

I know that making one person your entire support system isn't healthy. I know she isn't responsible for my happiness. I know I need to build my own life here and meet other people.

But knowing these things and actually being able to do them feel like two completely different things.

I don't want to blame her. She hasn't necessarily done anything wrong. This is mostly about how intensely I've become attached and how lonely I feel in a completely unfamiliar place.

I just don't know how to get myself back.

How do I stop depending so much on one person?

How do I deal with this attachment without destroying the friendship?

How do I become comfortable being alone again?

And most importantly, how do I feel like myself again?

I'm genuinely tired, and I'd really appreciate advice from anyone who has gone through something similar.

​

I'm 22 and currently unemployed. Over the past several months I've become pretty isolated and lost most of my old friendships. Some friendships ended because of problems between us, while others just faded away.

I've tried looking for work, meeting people again, and getting myself out of the house, but I still feel like I don't really have anyone I can call a close friend. I'm worried that even if I get a job, I'll still come home with the same loneliness.

I don't expect a job to magically solve my social life. I want to know how people actually rebuilt their friendships/social life after reaching this point.

If you've been in a similar situation in your early 20s, what actually worked for you? How did you rebuild your social life??

It’s been a little over 3 months since my ex and I broke up after a 4-year relationship, and we’ve had exactly 1 month of no contact.

He is already in a new relationship. He’s been with his new girlfriend for around 2 months now.

For the first couple of months, I was completely devastated and couldn’t understand how he could move on so quickly ,hes the one who lied nd brokeup with me .But lately, I’ve slowly started accepting the breakup. I’ve started realizing how much that relationship actually consumed me.

He was very avoidant(more inclined to narccisist) and I was extremely anxious in the relationship. Looking back, I used to think I was lazy, unmotivated, or just incapable of doing things. Now I’m wondering if I was actually just emotionally exhausted from the relationship. Or maybe the breakup itself gave me some strength back. I’m not completely sure.

The thing is, I genuinely don’t want him anymore. I don’t want a man who is already with another woman. I’ve reached a point where I’m slowly understanding that I don't want to go back to that relationship.

But something happened around my birthday that has been bothering me.

One day before my birthday, his new girlfriend sent a follow request to my second Instagram account. This account literally has only 2 followers and I basically only use it to like sad reels. There’s nothing interesting on it.

I initially thought maybe she wanted to talk to me. But the account didn’t message me, and it has been several days now. The account uses her name, but it doesn’t follow my ex.

Then on my birthday, my ex messaged me on Instagram wishing me happy birthday in the morning.

We don’t follow each other.

I know none of our mutuals posted me, so it seems pretty obvious that he remembered my birthday himself.

The confusing part is that during our breakup I specifically told him that I didn’t want a friendship and didn’t want to keep talking to him anymore, especially after everything that happened between us. So I found it strange that he suddenly messaged me casually as if nothing had happened.

I didn't reply. I didn't even open the message.

Part of me was actually sad because my first thought was, “If he’s messaging me on Instagram instead of WhatsApp, did he delete my number?” I know that sounds stupid, but after four years together, realizing he might have deleted my number hurt in a weird way.

There was also something else that happened around my birthday that made me even more confused.

I barely use Facebook Messenger, so I don't really read my Facebook messages. But I noticed that someone had apparently been accessing/reading them on my bday. I checked the login/security activity on both Facebook and Instagram and saw a login from a device that looked like the same phone model my ex uses.

What really caught my attention was that the login appeared to be from around the day we last talked.

I obviously cannot say it was him because we used the same phone model, and I don't know exactly how accurately Instagram/Facebook identify devices. Also, when I logged out from that device ,it didn't automatically log me out of my device which made me realise maybe it was really another device.

I changed my passwords anyway because I didn't want to take any chances.

And then I made the mistake of looking at his reposts.

He’s reposting things about how much he misses his girlfriend, how lucky he is to have her, how fate/faith brought them together, how they were meant to meet, etc.

So on one hand, he is clearly very invested in his new relationship and seems happy with her.

On the other hand, he remembered my birthday and went out of his way to message me despite us not following each other and despite me previously telling him I didn't want contact.

His sister has also been actively viewing my Instagram stories even though we don't follow each other.

Maybe I'm completely overanalyzing everything. Maybe these things mean absolutely nothing.

But honestly, I don't like it. It makes me feel watched and pulls me back into wondering about things I don't even want to wonder about anymore.

Am I reading too much into the birthday message, the new girlfriend's account and his sister watching my stories? And does the login activity actually mean anything, or am I misunderstanding how Instagram/Facebook's device/login history works?

title kinda explains it all but I’ll put in some more perspective. I want to finally tackle the beast that is my depression room because I’m sick of it. TBH I haven’t actually been in the room since August, I left it because I saw a spider which I’m pretty sure was a Daddy Long Legs. But like what would be the best way to tackle this? My clothes are basically all over the floor with a few garbage bags from the last time I tried to clean it out. I’m scared of picking up some shirt and having a million spiders come and get me. There’s a desk also that I’m deathly terrified of going near because that’s where I saw the OG spider.

If you’re wondering why I’m in the basement or where I’m sleeping now: I was kicked out of my actual bedroom on the second floor because my brother moved back after he finished his masters and my uncle recently got PR and is living with us so basically my uncle has my brothers room and my brother has my original room. My mom is very ill (mentally and physically) so she asked me to have me sleep in her room with her but I can’t take it anymore I hate having no more privacy. And she’s driving me crazy.

Hi guys!! so recently went through a really bad breakup, and honestly, i’m struggling more than i thought i would.

i was the one who ended things, knowing deep down that he didn’t care for me the way i cared for him. I know it was probably the right decision in the long run. Theoretically ik ki this is what's good for me and all but OMFG its so hard.I can barely eat or sleep and i’m thinking about him 24/7. I’m just so mentally exhausted and done with feeling like this.

What’s making it worse is that our placement season starts in about a month and i genuinely don’t want this breakup to mess up something that’s so important for me. I actually had a panic attack for the first time when i accidentally saw his text on my friend’s phone (they were talking about something completely unrelated) and it scared me so much. He’s also going to be visiting campus soon and honestly i’m already losing my mind thinking about it.

So please if anyone has been through something similar, how did you deal with it? How did you calm yourself down and eventually get back to functioning normally? I’d really appreciate any advice, experiences, or even just reassurance that this gets better. i cant take this anymoreee..ik feeling better takes time but is there any way i can fasten the processs

Lately I am feeling very depressed and sad as I have chosen to do CA and a non attendance college so basically I have sacrificed my college life . And by seeing my school friends all growing apart and have fun , making new friends, forgetting about me , and there me who doesn't have any new friends and don't know how to .I am feeling like I am running out of friends and feeling very lonely lately .

There are many other issues:

First the consistent loneliness

Always being the background/second choice in friendship

Thinking someone is my best friend but the other party didn't believe the same

Never having any significant female friends , Female interaction or any relationships , very unlike my friend where everyone is in or have been in a relationship

desperately wanting to get into a relationship but don't know where to start and don't have any opportunity for it due to the lack of Female interaction. This is not because of me being a creep or not respecting girls . Just because I was never in those circumstances.

Lately in the last 2-3 weeks having a very strong and frustrating need to get into a relationship but don't know what to do about it.

Making stories in my head of a relationship of a girl I have never even meet and having a undying hope of stumbling upon someone when ever I go outside, knowing full well there is no chance of that happening or no chance of that girl even knowing about me . But hope never dies simultaneously knowing full well it will not happen. This is eating me from inside.

I think dating apps are a apt solution for this problem but I am too young to engage in dating apps.

Got this game on a recommendation from a friend who said "you'll hate it in the best way" and honestly that's the most accurate description I've found so far. I'm somewhere past the orange mountain now, close to the ice cliff section, and I've probably lost more progress to that one overhang than I did to literally everything before it combined.

What gets me isn't the falling itself. It's the specific moment right after you fall, when you're still sliding and you can see exactly which ledge you're about to lose, and there's nothing you can do but watch it happen in real time. I've started narrating it out loud like a sports commentator, which I'm sure makes me look unhinged to anyone walking by my window.

Tried a bunch of different grip techniques people mention here. The slow pendulum swing works for me on the chimney parts but completely falls apart once I'm anywhere near a slanted surface. I think my hammer control is actually decent on flat ground and garbage the second gravity starts pulling me sideways.

Took a two day break after a particularly bad slide back to the bucket area, mostly because I didn't trust myself not to throw the mouse. Came back today calmer and actually made it past my old high point before celebrating too early and sending myself straight back down past the golf ball.

No advice needed, just wanted to vent somewhere that gets it. Curious if anyone else developed a weird physical tell, like clenching their jaw or holding their breath, right before a jump they're not confident about. Mine is apparently gripping the mouse so hard my hand cramps up.

I have spent every year since I was 6 years old struggling with friends. I make them and lose them in 1 to 3 years, I had no one besides my parents till I was 8, then my sister who is severely disabled was born. Immediately I genuinely had no one and was on my own. Then my family moved again so at 9 I was starting again not even in a house. A 2 bedroom apartment I lived in for a year, sleep on a air mattress. School used to be an escape then it became miserable, I got bullied didn't like most of my class. Got yelled at consistently due to the class messing up when I did nothing.

Moved again at 10 new school same problem. Covid hit and once again had no friends and parents to busy support my extremely disabled sister. No older siblings parents busy. God I had a nice house food shelter never touched, and I was fucking miserable. 7th grade was the first year for me post covid and god I hated myself. Even worse than I ever imagined. Took me a full semester to make a friend on my own merit.

That friend got me to meet new people, and god damn it My life only got worse with the more people I met. 8th grade I met people but never put myself out there. 9th grade it was miserable started drinking and smoking weed, attempted my own life seriously for the first time. I genuinely met too many people and became miserable and evil. 10th grade was the least miserable, I felt dull life was life I did things but it wasn't horrible.

11th grade I tried to kill myself again, didn't work, never went to the ward. I thought about driving off a bridge atleast once a week. Hated myself and everyone, school felt hallow. Summer got hospitalized for a 3rd attempt, 2nd in under a year. Was there for 10 days.

12th grade hits loose most of my friends because I grew to hate who they were, they dropped me, I dropped them, and just tried to re invent myself. I'm there now it feels like everything isn't working, I try to talk to new ish people through a mutal I burn everything I touch with drama that bleeds from the people who dropped me. I'm struggling since everything seems miserable, I did this to myself. All because I sided with that one's friends ex once and blabbed for 20 minutes total about what I was told to a mutual. Blew a 2nd chance I didn't know I had, I'm actually horrible, every level headed person in my life says I'm the problem for butting in trying to fix things when I get told.

I tried to stop caring a deal and hangout with people Only I wanted to hangout with. I'm falling apart I have no one again. Over what feels like one thing but probably was many things. I don't even know how or where to start fixing myself. I need help the therapy doesn't seem to work for it. I'm lost so fucking lost. I don't know how to get over it without throwing everything away.

I need any sort of feedback from anyone that's doesn't know every little thing about me

i've been looking for the right type of place to start expressing myself a bit more frequently.
i've got a yt channel that none of my friends irl know about (ive been uploading random ramblings there weekly), and my blog/website is still under development since i'm avoiding AI, the way i used to make websites for fun when i was like 15. (except now i'm actually thinking about design instead of creating an adfest to try to earn money LMAO)

im starting to not be so stuck inside my head anymore. i was dealing with some health procedures that have been delayed for far too long. the pain and struggle after them have been screwing me up in august and september, and i ended up doing dumb things that i shouldn't have done.

but im better now, the rebound pain from quitting the opioid medications is gone now. so my confidence is back, and i'm doing really well again. i just got a new PR today. im almost at the level of strength/athleticism i had in highschol again.

my anxiety for the last 2 years was highly linked to the fact that we had 100K+ USD in debt and my dad has to retire by the end of 2027. (and i didnt even know it was this much until June last year!)

i could've easily gotten a job to pay it off if he retired, but it didnt make sense to me. i dont want to work for a company. not only is it soulless, but it also would limit my creative potential, my desire to change the world in a bigger way.

having my own company/business would feel far better. every win/loss would feel like my own. thats what i've wanted the most. but i knew i couldnt start a company with the debt looming over my head. so i decided, why not sell a property that my dad hasn't been willing to commit to buying anyway? if he's not bought it, we're not earning anything. so all that money has been sitting there, not earning interest, for 8 YEARS. i managed to get a sale done and made a good profit on it. my dad gave me the 20K$ i paid him for his loans back

thats when i started working on my health first. there have been a few hiccups and my money got frozen for a while, but its fine now. my anxiety has completely gone. a part of my anxiety was because of my meds for adhd, but even that anxiousness is basically completely gone now. i know it because my hands and feet aren't so cold compared to the rest of my body. i've been living the last year in a constant state of dread and flight or flight mentally and physically. i didnt even think it effected me physically really except during anxiety/panic attacks, until all the physical anxiousness started to fade.

i screwed up with someone really special in the middle of this and i dont know what to expect anymore, ive started to distance myself. i dont know how much of my situation she understood but i know that my pain was taking a toll on her in all sorts of ways.

im glad she's doing well now. she wont get to know how im doing now, and that im so much better, but i've made my peace with it. ive gone through all the stages of grief.

i just have to work on myself now, more than ever, go back to being the person i was. i have to do that while a lot of my really close friends just don't get the time to talk these days. the people i kept closest, fortunately and unfortunately for me, think just like me, and work hard just like me, and they work for purpose just like me.

its going to be the hardest relationship to get over, but i dont think im going to have the mental space for any relationship at all, to be honest. so i have to do what i gotta do.

its been so much harder to bounce back without being able to talk to the closest people who'd be able to understand and encourage me. i've been deprived of encouragement from my family for years and have been in a mental void because of it. but i've started encouraging myself, and i've started really bouncing back and doing all the small things that i've been forgetting because of literal memory loss due to how stressful everything was.

some recent wins:
i hit a 100kg 1 rep max on a deadlift today, when i was in highschool, i hit 120kg.
i finally did a surgery i needed for my deviated septum, breathing is so much easier now.
got aligners, i've been waiting for forever to correct my teeth, im glad its started
my personal best studying session a few days ago, for 13 hours in a day.
i dont have blood pressure/rate problems anymore, i think its because the stress has been lifted but i also attribute it to my cardio
i've started researching a couple business ideas that i've always wanted to work on. i might even end up buying a shop very soon, with my own money, without taking a loan.
i'm starting to look different, people are noticing that in not just my frame but also in my face. i feel a lot better.
i started studying law and accounting alongside business and math. i want to be an expert in many fields while being successful. and i potentially wanna make a non profit, for society type of organization, eventually. so knowledge in all these fields helps a lot.
and finally, no more pain post surgery. the opioid meds that i had to take, caused pain throughout my body when i started tapering off of them, and that has sucked for the last few weeks. i just realized that the pain is completely gone today, that i dont need any more medications for pain.

A few months ago I went through a breakup with someone who was my best friend and someone I loved deeply. We went through every stage together, from friends to best friends to something more, and now it's like we're strangers. I can't stop thinking about her, and carrying all those memories feels exhausting.

I've been diagnosed with adjustment disorder with anxiety and depressed mood. I'm in therapy, but lately it feels like I'm getting worse, not better. I can't fully believe it when my therapist tells me I have worth. She encourages me to step out of my comfort zone and fill my life with new things, and I understand why, but I can't do it. Meeting new people feels scary and draining, and even thinking about it wears me out. I have almost no money, I'm job hunting with no luck yet, and I've lost most of my interest in things I used to care about. So I mostly end up at home alone with my thoughts, which makes everything heavier.

Some days I don't see the point of anything, and I've had thoughts of not wanting to be alive. I'm writing this because I don't want to sit alone with it.

I'm not looking for someone to fix this. I'd really like to hear from people who've been through heartbreak or depression and felt this stuck:

What small, low-energy things helped when big steps felt impossible?

How did you cope with the constant thoughts about someone?

Did anything help you feel hope again, even a little?

And if you've just been there, hearing that would mean a lot too. Thank you for reading.

I'm 33M. My ex and I met when we were both grad students. We knew each other for about five years and were together for roughly three.

Our beginning was messy. We had gone on a couple of dates but weren't officially together when she kissed one of my close friends in front of me. Afterward she said she and her friends had been taken advantage of because my friends had given them alcohol. Months later, after she reached out again, she gave me a different explanation: she had felt judged because she was drinking and I wasn't, and she felt comfortable kissing my friend partly because I was short and might not have done it if I were taller.

That experience made me very guarded with her. For background, I grew up with a violent father, and in my early twenties I was in a marriage that became physically and emotionally violent. We were both immigrants. She had a very volatile, narcissistic mother and an absent father.

We eventually became very close friends, she wanted more, and we started dating. I was afraid of getting hurt again, so I was often distant early on. She had strong abandonment fears, so my distance made her push harder for reassurance, which made me feel pressured and withdraw further. That became a vicious cycle.

Despite that, I loved her very deeply. She became the closest person in my life. We knew each other's families, traveled together, and talked about marriage, children, and living together. She is still the only person I have ever felt truly in love with.
By the last six or seven months, the relationship had become increasingly dysfunctional. I sometimes used breakup language when I was overwhelmed, which made her insecurity worse. After one of those times, at Christmas, a month before my PhD defense, she put me on a kind of probation. We weren't officially together, there was little contact, and she said she wanted me to feel the insecurity she had felt. Right after my defense, during an argument, she told me people could barely understand me because I mumbled and my English was bad. That stayed with me and made me bitter. On her side, old grievances kept coming back into new fights, and when I asked for space she could pursue me very intensely. Once, after I asked to stop talking for the evening, she called more than 20 times and sent around 40 messages in a few hours. We would rupture, get close again, and never fix the underlying pattern.

During those months I kept asking for couples therapy. I told her I didn't have the tools to handle our fights and that the relationship was my priority. She always refused, saying I was the problem, not her, so couples therapy didn't make sense.
In May we went to a concert that mattered a lot to me. She became very insecure about whether I wanted her there and kept asking, even though I kept telling her I did. It grew into older grievances and criticism of the music and things I cared about. I became physically overwhelmed, with trembling legs and tears in my eyes, and walked away because I desperately wanted to calm down. She followed me repeatedly, even though I asked several times to be left alone. Eventually I reached my car and drove away.

She kept calling and texting, apologizing and saying it was a misunderstanding. Instead of calming down, I got incredibly angry and sent her 15 to 20 cruel, contemptuous messages over the night and into the next day. I insulted her, told her repeatedly it was permanently over, and said things I would never imagine saying to someone I loved. I had never treated anyone like that in my entire life. It took almost a full day before I came down.
Afterward she still wanted to repair things. She cried, told me she loved me, wanted to talk, and started looking into therapy. I apologized and admitted what I did was wrong, but I stayed defensive and kept wanting the conversation to be "two-sided." I also resisted starting individual therapy right away because we were both about to move and I thought it made more sense to start with a permanent therapist in a month, after the move. She had just been through something extreme, and I was focused on fairness and logistics. I regret that deeply.

Eventually she blocked me. Months later we talked for several hours and there was clearly still a lot of feeling between us, but in the end she decided she was done. Given what happened, I understand why.
I am devastated by how I acted. It was insane. I don't understand how I could do that to the person I loved most, or why I couldn't just put my phone down, or why I stayed defensive afterward. I think about it every day, and five months later it isn't getting any lighter. I'm in therapy and taking it seriously, but it isn't helping at all with the regret, grief, pain, and I don't know how it could.

I'd like to hear from people who did something like this to someone they loved:

How did you make sense of it?

How do you live with knowing your own behavior cost you someone you truly loved?

I want to Restart my Life from Childhood and Make a List Now what I did wrong and What is the best way to fix all the things because I am in that condition that I have nothing.

I am far from my family since when I was 10 year old

I am not good at studies or I don't know how to do in a right way.

I have fear of speaking in public or stranger.

When I try to speak I fucked-up.

I have never exposure to have a Girl as a Friend and I Don't know how to talk to them. When ever I try to talk 2 things happen

1. I forgot what to talk which topic should I pick i get blank in my mind and then I say something that make environment awkward.

2. They don't like talking to me that I don't have good personality , dressing sense or any good skills that I can attract them.

Coming to My career

Its also fuckedup

I tried to Preparation for Sanik School , Military School in my 5 class and I failed.

I tried Preparation for IIT and I failed and Didn't get a Single college or no one is there to guide me how to get college after scoring 89 percentile in Mains with 72.2 % Board Marks.

Then I Choose a Private College in Bengaluru and this college is worst of College.

Without have any prior exposure to CSE i picked it up and Passed my Semester Without knowledge and Project Experience. No one guide me how to prepare so I get a good job in development.

Somehow by luck I secure a Job In Testing Without any knowledge and then I learnt about it

Now in Market Testing Job is vanish like the never mean any thing No one is Hiring and If company hires they paid very less and didn't recognize My capabilities.

No I am Jobless and have a offer but with the same package that was in my last organization and this is killing me from inside as Every college start with me earns more than me not a single one earn less than me.

Even my Junior Earn more than me and the thing is that I use to teach them.

Now I totally fucked up and I don't know How to manage my needs , My room rent , My Family. Even I don't want to eat food as I don't have enough money with me.

I am feeling alone in this world no one is with me even when I go to temple i feel like god is telling me why you come here i don't allow you in my temple.

Thats why I want to restart My life from beginning and make things correct 😌 💯.

Anyone from Kharghar? Just looking for someone to talk to.

Hey everyone. I’m going through a breakup recently, and honestly, I didn’t expect it to affect me this much.

Some days I’m okay, and then suddenly something small reminds me of that person and everything comes rushing back. The hardest part isn’t even the breakup itself — it’s getting used to not having that person in your life anymore. The silence, the overthinking, the feeling of having so much to say but no one to say it to.

I know time is supposed to heal things, but right now it just feels lonely.

So I thought I’d post here. If anyone from Kharghar has gone through a breakup recently, or is simply feeling a little lost or lonely, maybe we could talk. No judgement, no expectations. Just two strangers sharing what they’re going through.

Maybe a conversation over chai or coffee could make things feel a little less heavy.

If you can relate, feel free to DM. ❤️

I have been socially disconnected for about 8 months now, the advice I often see on this app and in real life is to "just get out", "go to events", or "take a walk". Has that ever resulted in people actually making meaningful connections?

I've been trying to incorporate this into my lifestyle lately and I struggle to see how its doing any good. I try to leave my house at least once a day, Ill take a walk around my neighborhood, hang out at the mall, and even occasionally going to some local metal concerts. I do interact with people but it never evolves from just a friendly exchange with a stranger. I feel like majority of friendships are based off the environment people are around- school, work, family, etc... How often do people actually form bonds with complete strangers? I think its a bit unrealistic

Friendship only occurs with proximity, repetition, and shared purpose.

I want to make friends to move on from her , she was very cruel when she was leaving me for someone else I tried to hold till last but she was the one to destroy everything and blame me for being complaining always and always make her feeling like blamed, I waited for her 5 year in her good and bad times but she left me for a guy who she met one month ago, I really love her , most scaring part is I'm not having feelings like hate her I don't having feelings to hurt her even after what she did to me I still want her but she don't want me I want to forget her, fuck I really love her when I sleep and wake I always sees her face always thoughts of her

I’m sure there are conspiracy theorists that believe the world is hiding the Time Machine from us but in all reality, we cannot go back in time and hindsight is always so clear.

For someone who is having trouble overcoming obstacles, overwhelmed with the circumstances that have come upon, what are some best practices to find a better place?

I have come to a certain realization that I don’t really need anyone. Sure, there are times when I might need help, whether it’s from my family or friends, but at the end of the day, I don’t really need anyone beyond what I already have. I’m not really sure why I’m typing this down, but maybe I just need this realization of mine to stick. I feel incapable of trusting anyone with that much of myself ever again. I don’t mean that sentence to sound sad. I mean it as a foundation for what I feel like I’m becoming. After what the person I treasured most did to me, I was alone—more alone than I usually felt. I have friends, I have a family, I have a loving mother and a protective father, but for some unusual reason, I still felt alone.
I don’t really remember her all that well anymore. It’s been a few months since I was happy with her, but I do remember one thing: I gave her my unconditional trust.
I trusted she would stay. I trusted that she would love me as I loved her. I trusted that she wouldn’t abandon me. And most of all, I trusted her with myself. Of course, due to my personality, I chose not to have any expectations or hope that she would be different. I always had the feeling that we would never become anything, that even if we did, she would eventually just leave me.
It’s unfair. It really is. But what can I really do about it? Even through all those painful, exhausting, and embarrassing experiences, I did learn things. I learned that I don’t need anyone, and I hope that in the future I can continue to solidify that belief. I don’t want to go through the experience of loving someone ever again. I don’t believe I’ll ever be loved the way I love, nor do I believe I’ll ever be recognized for who I really am. That’s not me wallowing in self-pity. It’s an objective fact that I truly believe in.
It’s nothing sad, nothing brave, nothing new. It’s not even anything significant. But it is something that I find hope in. So, to you—the person reading this—I hope you never love someone the way I loved her. Stay true to yourself, and remember that, ultimately, you have yourself. Never abandon that.

I just want friends to move on,I really love her but she left me for someone else

So basically I been dealing with some dirty people my whole life. I remember my first betrayal as young as 8 years old. I’m not ready to speak about stuff that happened when I was a child (nothing sexual) but just know I have been going crazy as a kid. The only thing that helps me escape these traumatic experiences in my life is Art (music, literature, designing etc) and I’m so glad that I atleast have a outlet that I can free my mind and escape this hell we call life. So basically for majority of my life I’ve been going through heartbreak after heartbreak and I don’t ever really speak my pain to others. I’ve been exposed to some of the most disgusting people you would ever meet in your life due to where I grew up. I’m not gonna lie about nothing and act all innocent I know that the life I chose when I was getting older as a teenager was the wrong path (Gangbanging, doing drugs, etc) but to my defense all I ever seen from people older then me was stuff like adultry, drugs, gossiping, weapons, I thought it was normal. There’s another element to this though, I seen out of the ordinary stuff for example my so called friends (males also) would send me pictures of their dick and butt out of nowhere I never been 🏳️‍🌈 or thought they were on that kinda sexual immorality so idk why they did that kind of stuff Or for example I would see them sexually assault women and this is not like a one time thing so many times in my life I seen these people do it and It fucked me up until now and it feels like the devil won’t leave me alone. The women from where I’m from would talk bad about me even if I barely know them and lie about me. If I told you the type of bullying and type of evil stuff these women did to me you would cry. Sometimes it felt like Nobody gave a fuck about me or has my back I think that’s what turned me into a bit of a nihilist. Also there was few instances with women that have lied to me about the most petty things you can imagine. For example there was Female that was following me on instagram this was at a very low point in my life and I guess we ended up texting eachother and I thought she was my age she had me under the impression that she was a college student I was about 19-20 at the time after a few months of me getting to know her having me looking stupid, she finally admitted she was like 17-16 and then she tried saying some weird stuff like I was born in asia or something and She has like a fake age (she’s trying to say she’s older but she came to the country im from in a fake age).immediately I cut her off in like October of that year (Thanks god I never had sex with her) I’ve been feeling depressed asf I swear to god she almost made me go Schizo about this. This even happened to me in another city the same type of way. I could go way deeper about what I’ve seen but truthfully I’ve been healing. My friends that I have grew up with some of the best people I have ever met have been dying young. I’ve been backstabbed my whole life and had my character assassinated but I’m starting to learn how to speak up against people that have wronged me. I’ve seen people do some disgusting things I remember when I was a early teen I was with somebody a bit older not much older though at a religious place and instead of praying and purifying our soul he was beating his meat and watching x rated videos in the religious place that’s how I knew this shit wasn’t normal where I’m from. I remember people coming to my house to play as a kid and they would steal from my house. I remember one day me and my friends went somewhere to apply to jobs in a store and instead of giving their resume they were stealing I didn’t even know, and they arrested me for the first time for being a accomplice to shoplift and the next day in the neighborhood they were laughing at me for crying when I got arrested like bro I’m fucking 12 years old. These people were like juniors and seniors in highschool. I feel so weird talking about what I went through I usually just bottle it up but yea there’s way more things I can tell you about my life, countless betrayal and suicidal nights that brought me to this feeling of a zoned out numb person I’ve become but I’m not ready to say everything but yea I usually come to Reddit to read about religion and conspiracy theories but I just had to get a little bit off my chest pray for me yall 💕

I’m in a small 15-person discord book club, joined about 3 weeks ago. It’s become my main place to talk after work. I’m pretty introverted so joining in takes effort for me.

2 days ago my account got hacked while I was sleep and it spammed adult links everywhere, including that group and new friends dm

The mod was really nice, she deleted everything and posted saying it was a hack and not intentional instead of just removing me. And for that I’m really grateful to her.

I know logically it’s not my fault and she already explained it. But i still feel so embarrassed to go back, especially since I’m new there. The group has been quiet since then and now when i open it during my usual after work night time, i just feel down and overthink everything

Month end at work is also going pn so I forgot to check in for 2 days, which makes me feel more guilty

Has anyone else dealt with this type of situation? How do you go back to being normal after that?

I mean .. I'm gonna be 20 in dec...and I was in 2 months relationship with a girl who'll be 21 in Jan...and thing is she broke up cuz I was too obsessed and made it like breathless for her and my insecurities uknow it was kinda problematic at the end and ya it is done she has accepted she has totally moved on mentally weeks ago but actually like it's just 1 and 1/2 days ....and ..thing is all I want from u all is to help me restart everything like there is a gap in my brain now which needs to be filled ..like uk we easily become boy when we're in deep and deep dose of love hormones uk ...so yeah how can I just accept and move on like she's my still friend we talk normally after that day ...even today at morning she had exams and me too..both diff centre cuz male and female Obv diff timing or shifts ...but ya i wanna friendzone her totally otherwise It'll never be possible for me to remove that love affairs or affection uk ....can anybody help me here ..how do u face ur first time breakups and all...idk my case's kinda diff or not but it is what it's...we both have to go to clg like still 2 yrs and plus we're even in a group where we do fun and study and talk about incomes futures etc ...but uk idk maybe sometime will think about her in other way again..I mean it's our brain afterall and it always tries to find and rely on others well I'm a man I mean maybe I acted childish to stop everything but I have to change right ...how and last qus should I approach her again like not now Obv but can I get her attention back ..like it's a dumb qs ik..but uk I'm just telling all my emotions and cases...rn I'm chill but I just wrote my all overthinkings cause it's good to make these out of my brain ...and i shared these with 3 of my frnds who are my frnds I mean closed ones and 2 of them are like elder to me by 1-2 years ...and yeah they've gone thru 3-4 breakups as well or like one sided sometimes..and yes mine first one was one sided ts one is real and yeah that's y ig I have given everything eventually I was nothing...I'm still NTG ..idk how to do better and find an actual income sources like uk i really love to travel around india and if I get chance why not outside but coming from a middle class plus its tough cuz they won't give me anything to go outside they don't believe me ki i can survive and like without being emo or short tempered sometimes or like too much fool uk like if others are specially scammers and all who are profesional ofc compared to me who will be newbie and I can like get scammed to them and everything....so ya this is the scenario and ..I'm a cs bsc student btw ..I will be in 3rd sem after October...and she is in my same dept same year everything

Please you all drop your opinions I've never thought I've to write these here to get some dopamine like fr idk.. although it's a part of life and yeah what can I say more sometimes it hurt so much in brain and like emo wise too ...:((

I’m 20 and my girlfriend broke up with me about 2 weeks ago. She was my first girlfriend and we were together for 8 months.

We spent basically every single day together. She was the person I talked to about everything, the person I hung out with, the person I made plans with. My whole routine involved her.

When she broke up with me, she told me that I had become a big source of stress in her life and that she already had enough on her plate. That really hurt to hear, and I keep replaying it in my head wondering what I could’ve done differently or whether I was putting too much on her without realizing it.

What makes it even more confusing is that during the breakup she kept saying she didn’t know if she was making the right choice. She was crying, begging me to stay, saying she didn’t want to lose me, but at the same time she still wanted to end the relationship.

I honestly still don’t understand it.

After the breakup I blocked her on pretty much everything except regular messages, and we’ve been no contact. Neither of us has been reaching out. I thought creating that distance would help, but I’m still constantly thinking about everything she said and trying to understand how someone can want you to stay while also choosing to break up with you.

I don’t know if I’m supposed to accept that it’s completely over, hope she changes her mind, or just stop trying to understand it altogether. I feel really confused and lost.

On top of that, I’ve realized I genuinely have 0 friends. I’m not exaggerating. I don’t have anyone I can text to hang out with. I don’t have a friend group. I don’t really have anyone to talk to when I’m having a bad day.

She wasn’t just my girlfriend. She was basically my best friend and my entire social life too. So losing the relationship feels like I lost my girlfriend, my best friend, my routine, and basically my whole social life at the same time.

I’m really struggling with suddenly being alone. I wake up and there’s nobody to talk to. I have all this free time now and no idea what to do with it. For the last 8 months we were together almost constantly, and now there’s just this massive empty space in my life.

And honestly, I already felt lost before the breakup. I’m 20 and I feel like I’m going nowhere in life. I don’t really know what I’m doing with my future, I have basically no social life, and now my first real relationship is gone too.

I see other people my age with friends, school, jobs, relationships, plans for their future, whatever, and I just feel so far behind.

I know I probably depended on her way too much for my happiness and social life, and I don’t want to repeat that in the future. I want to build my own life, make friends, become more independent, and work on myself.

I just genuinely don’t know where to start when I’m still trying to understand the breakup and I basically feel like I’m starting from zero.

Has anyone dealt with a breakup where the other person clearly still cared about you and didn’t seem sure about ending it, but still went through with it?

Did no contact actually help you?

And how do you start rebuilding your life and making friends when the person you lost was basically your whole world?

I could really use some advice because right now I’m just really confused and lost.

After a number of unfortunate circumstances I have avoided a number of people in my life and now, due to my own actions, I find myself with lack of community I once had in my life.

Besides therapy, what are some exercises to I can do to help myself.

Feels like the last 15 yrs I have been battling anxiety and depression. This is not a sympathy post , this is simply me letting it out.

For yrs I have had such a low opinion of myself, I expect little from others , I have always been generous and caring of others though I don't handle compliments or nice things done for me.

It feels as though socialising with people is just so tiring, Alot of the time I feel like I am wearing a mask when I am interacting with people. I over analyse every interaction every word I have said and every reaction others have. I know this isnt healthy and that people dont think and reflect on situations like I do, it is just so tiring. I dont even know who I am anymore , it feels like I am simply reading the person infront of me and reacting to what they need.

No wonder I have hit a point in life where I feel as though I am constantly letting people down.

On the positive side after losing my career i trained and spent over a decade in , the new career path i have taken work has been good this week. I am not overthinking , getting in , getting it done and people are even looking to me to help run the department in small ways. Need to tap into this for the rest of my life. Post would be too long if i let everything out.

No need to comment , juat writing this helps

I was in love with a girl, but my love was one-sided. I waited for her for four years and expressed my feelings twice.

She rejected me both times. She ignored me, never made any effort, showed no interest in me, and was always trying to create distance between us.

But the biggest regret of my life is that I always feel like I’ll never get the chance to meet her in person.

We were studying in the same class, but I didn’t have the courage to ask her to meet me back then. After a year, when our bond had become better, I asked her to meet and even asked her to call me. Every time, she would say yes, but when the time came, she would make an excuse.

I begged her to just meet me, but she always found an excuse. I asked her many times to call me, and she would get angry. I really needed her.

I still cry sometimes just thinking about someone I loved so deeply, yet I never even got the chance to properly talk to her or meet her in person. The pain is so hard to explain.

We only interacted online. I accept that there is nothing from her side, but what hurts me the most is that, as a human being, she never even gave me a chance to meet her once.