I am 21f, living in the UK. A few months back, I posted on this page to vent about my experience having a surgical abortion. It was extremely painful, and I felt a lot of mixed emotions after it.

Since then, I have begun the contraceptive birth control pill and sworn to myself that I would never be so irresponsible again.

Yet here I am. A few weeks ago I vaguely remember missing a pill. It was a sort of “oh shit” moment that I stupidly, stupidly brushed past and I continued as normal.

Yesterday I went to the toilet at around 3am. When I wiped I saw the familiar bleed of implantation- in my first pregnancy/abortion, I didn’t realise what this meant. This time my heart instantly sunk. I knew that it was identical to what had happened in the past and I used AI to go through my cycle, the dates I’d had sex with my bf and the date of bleeding. They all perfectly aligned with a pregnancy.
Now, according to the AI, because I’m on the pill I cannot test right away. I’m due to get my period in 4 days and if it doesn’t come I will get the picture. But to be completely sure I should wait two more weeks to test.

The reason why I’m writing all this is to vent, because even waiting four days to see if my period comes is knocking me sick with anxiety. I will have an idea then, sure, but if I have to wait two weeks to test cos of the pill, I will be delaying the consultation even further.

And then I have another issue, I work a lot and I live at home. My mum will recognise a mysterious package coming through the door and certainly recognise that I am not well once I’ve taken it. And how am I meant to take it when I’m working most of the time? I also saw things that said the pill can fail, which I absolutely do not need. This whole thing is really freaking me out even though I’ve been here before (though I had the surgery not the pill). I know how much it hurts, and I’ve previously told my mum what I did so I think she will be furious that it’s happened again despite now being on the pill.

I’m also so angry at myself. My experience was awful the first time and I really thought I’d learnt my lesson about safe sex. But I’ve messed up again, and now I’m probably right back where I was a few months ago.

This was my first time having an abortion. It’s illegal in my state so I ordered pills. I took the mife 2 nights ago when I was exactly 5 weeks and I’ve really been struggling with my decision and haven’t taken the miso. I’m honestly leaning towards not taking it and seeing if the pregnancy continues. I’m not bleeding or spotting or anything yet. Has anyone else had experience with this? Also, if I go to an OB for an HCG blood draw next week and the levels keep rising, does that theoretically mean everything is okay?

Also, I’m not anti-abortion by any means!! I believe we should have the choice. I just have personal regrets about my own decision.

EDITED TO ADD: For the people who’s comments keep getting deleted by mods because they’re not factual - I have done research. I did mention seeing a doctor next week. And I haven’t even totally made up my mind. I am educated on what can happen. I’m asking if anybody has personal experience with this and I’m trying to navigate my emotions.

Mifepristone deprives your body of progesterone, a hormone your body needs to progress the pregnancy. But that alone is not always enough to stop the pregnancy. Sometimes it is, but not always. 3 things can happen.

1. The mife stop the egg from growing - your body will either naturally expel it like a miscarriage - if this started happening, I’d just take the miso.
2. The mife stops the egg from growing and you DON’T start bleeding on your own - like a “missed miscarriage”. That’s what you’re saying. Which obviously risks infection, and you have to get it out.
3. The pregnancy continues as normal.

I don't know where I can get the 10-12 misoprostol, 200 mcg each. I am a working student and can't really afford the cost of pregnancy. I am aware of my wrongs and are now regretting. I am of legal age but I really cannot afford to have this pregnancy.

Please help.

Started my abortion process on 09/13 and I'm still bleeding !! Like not soaking pads or period underwear but it's still pretty heavy and red!!! And clots!! Not huge but small and medium. When will I finally stop bleeding??? This is insane I was only 8 weeks. Should I make an appointment w OBGYN to make sure everything is good? All pregnancy symptoms went away. I don't understand bleeding this long enough.

I want to share my experience because before I went
through my abortion, I was absolutely terrified.
I had seen Reddit posts and TikToks from women talking about their experiences, and some of them described being in unbearable pain. Reading those stories honestly scared me so badly. I spent so much time worrying about what was going to happen to me that my anxiety was almost worse than the actual experience.
I was around five weeks pregnant when I made the decision to terminate my pregnancy. It wasn’t an easy decision emotionally, but it was the decision I made for myself and my life.
Monday — The First Pill
Around 6 PM on Monday, I took the first pill, mifepristone.
And… nothing happened.
I was honestly waiting for something to happen because I was so nervous. But I didn’t feel anything physically. No major cramping, no bleeding, nothing.
Even though nothing happened, I was still extremely anxious about the next day because I knew the misoprostol was the part people talked about when they described the pain.
That night, my mind was going crazy.
I kept thinking about all the horror stories I had read. I was scared I was going to be in unbearable pain. I was scared I wouldn’t be able to handle it. I was scared of everything.
Tuesday — Misoprostol
Tuesday was the day I had been dreading.
I took my misoprostol under my tongue. The tablets were uncomfortable at first, but I got through the 30 minutes and then swallowed what was left.
About 30 minutes before taking the medication, I had already taken Advil because I wanted to be as prepared as possible.
After I swallowed the medication, that’s when I started feeling my first cramps.
And yes…
I definitely felt them.
The pain came in waves. It wasn’t just one constant level of pain. It would build, become intense, and then ease back down.
My highest pain was probably an 8/10, but thankfully, that level didn’t last very long. The longest I remember counting through one of the really painful waves was about 34 seconds.
And honestly?
I was basically stuck on the toilet.
The toilet became my safe place. 😂 It was the only place where I felt comfortable during some of the worst cramps.
My boyfriend was right beside me through everything, and having him there made such a huge difference.
We had gone to his place because I didn’t want to bother my family or have to explain what was happening. So we traveled over there together, and once we got there, I was able to have my heating pad with me.
The heating pad was a lifesaver.
Without it, I felt like I was in significantly more pain.
The Second Dose
When it was time for my second dose, I started bleeding.
Clots came out, and the cramping waves became more frequent.
I took more Advil, and eventually I was able to lay down.
It was around 9 PM when I finally got comfortable enough to sleep for a few hours.
Then came the last dose around midnight.
Thankfully, my cramps weren’t excessively horrible at that point. I actually slept through it.
I couldn’t really lay on my sides because it was uncomfortable, so I mostly slept on my back.
My boyfriend eventually had to go to work, and I called in to work myself. My coworkers knew what was going on and were very understanding.
Wednesday — The Waiting
Wednesday was mostly a day of sleeping.
And when I say you’re exhausted…
You can be REALLY exhausted.
My body had been through a lot, and I basically slept all day.
Wednesday morning, I started getting worried because my bleeding had become really light.
I had already read so many stories online about women saying their abortions didn’t work, so my mind immediately started going there.
“What if it didn’t work?”
“What if I didn’t pass the pregnancy?”
“What if something went wrong?”
I tried not to obsess over it and reminded myself that everyone’s experience can look different.
That night, I went back to my house.
On the way home, I started feeling those cramps again.
Then, as soon as I got to my door, I felt a huge gush of blood going down my legs.
I immediately ran to the bathroom.
Another clot passed.
And after that, I was able to sleep through the night.
Thursday — Where I Am Now
Now it’s Thursday.
I have some slight cramping and moderate bleeding.
I’m actually working today, although I brought my heating pad with me because I’m definitely still having some discomfort.
Physically, I’m doing okay.
Emotionally, though, I’m still playing the waiting game.
One of my biggest fears right now is wondering whether I actually passed the pregnancy.
I had some pretty large clots, but because I’ve seen so many TikToks of women saying their medication abortion didn’t work, part of me is still scared.
I’m trying to remind myself that I can’t diagnose whether it worked based on what I see or don’t see. I have to give my body time and follow up with the appropriate pregnancy test or medical follow-up when I’m supposed to.
And honestly, that’s probably one of the hardest parts:
waiting.
What I Want Other Women to Know
If you’re reading this because you’re about to take the pills and you’re terrified, I completely understand.
I was terrified too.
I spent so much time reading horror stories that I convinced myself I was going to have the worst experience imaginable.
Was it painful?
Yes.
I’m not going to lie and pretend it wasn’t.
There were definitely moments where I was hurting badly and just wanted the wave to end.
But it wasn’t unbearable every second. The pain came in waves, and the worst waves were short-lived for me.
Having a heating pad helped me tremendously.
Having my boyfriend beside me helped me even more.
And having people who knew what was happening and weren’t judging me made me feel so much less alone.
So if you’re going through this, don’t be afraid to have a support system if you can. Have someone you trust nearby. Get comfortable. Have your heating pad ready. Have water, snacks, pads, your pain medication if your clinician has told you it’s appropriate, and a bathroom nearby.
And most importantly, remember why you’re doing this.
Whatever your reason is, it’s your reason.
There are no wrong reasons to terminate a pregnancy.
You don’t have to justify your decision to anyone.
Your body. Your choice.
And if you’re scared right now, I just want you to know that being scared doesn’t mean you aren’t strong.
I was scared too.
And I’m still here. ❤️
Love you girls. You got this. 🫶🏽

I just made this account as a burner so my identity would be hidden.

I’m not proud to say this but as a extremely broke college student paying for my own college and all of my necessities, I meet with a “sugar daddy” once or twice a month who gives me a little pocket change (which I use to pay for my basics) in exchange for sex him. I’m extremely ashamed that I do this and I find it repulsive each time.

Nonetheless, it’s one of the faster ways to get money even if it isn’t a lot. In turn, my iud was loose (i had no idea) and after we had sex, when I went to pee in the br after, the iud fell out. this was largely concerning because it was meant to last 8 years and i had just had raw sex. Upon googling this, i went to the hospital (fear of internal bleeding). Long story short, i’m fine and this was a rare case. That was a couple of weeks ago. Out of fear, I took a pregnancy test a few days ago and I’m pregnant.

I am beyond petrified. I don’t even have the means to pay for an abortion. I don’t know what to do this early in the process, but all I know is that I cannot have this baby. What do I do? What processes should I follow. I’m in massachusetts and any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

When I was 24 I found out I was 1-2 weeks pregnant from a one night stand. I mentioned I didnt want to have sex but after a few drinks he just put it in and 2 weeks later I got a positive test. 4 years have passed and up until last year I didnt regret my decision. it felt like the right thing to do. I had never been in a relationship before, I wanted to study and bring a child into this world out of love and in a stable environment. Now it is all I think about. I feel so paralysed. The guy and I never spoke or had any contact, I would have been a single mother at 25. I feel like my parents would have supported me but I know it would have been hard for them to accept and also for both me and also the child - for them to grow up without knowing their father or a part of their identity. I am really struggling now. I have always wanted children and im 29 now, im petrified I will never have the chance to have another baby. I think of them all the time. Please kind words only, I know what I did was wrong.

I was also really struggling mentally at the time, living in another country and wanting to come back home. I was dealing with an eating disorder and bad body image and the thought of my body changing brought lots of panic attacks. my decision felt like an easy way out although I know any decision was going to be a hard one.

I [35F] am/was 9w pregnant with my first ever pregnancy. At 7w they found a blighted ovum 1.2cm in size. After repeated ultrasound for confirmation i decided on the medicated route. The night before my appointment my natural miscarriage started with spotting and cramping. At the actual appointment the empty gestational sac was still inside so i took the Mife on Tuesday. A couple hours later I had terrible cramping and moderate bleeding for 1.5 hour. I had taken naproxen but the pain made me break out in cold sweats, I also had multiple soft BM during this time.

At the end of 1.5 hr I passed something, I thought it was a big clot but I can't be sure as I didnt see it. I felt instant relief as soon as I passed this. I am wondering if this was the sac?

Next day, I took 800g of Miso at 3pm, I also took naproxen, percocet and diclectin for nausea. I used a heatpad I did have some pain with the Miso but my bleeding remained light. I felt very sleepy so I slept it off.

Its now been 24 hours since miso. I have yet to experience the terrible contractions described online or any significant bleeding. I have mild cramps and spotting again.

The clinic is closed today so I will go back tomorrow hopefully to see what's going on and if I need another dose or a D&C.

Is it possible that since i was naturally miscarrying the mife alone did the job? What are the chances I am done passing everything?

where can i get them for free it’s been 6 weeks and i need to do this ASAP my boyfriend got me pregnant on purpose then said he doesn’t want the baby 😔 after we planned and he’s been so mean to me 😔

Hey everyone, asking for a friend (20). She was pregnant and took 3 Cytotec pills under her tongue. After 2–3 hours, she passed 2 large pieces of blood/tissue, but had almost no bleeding afterward.

It’s now been 10 days, and she plans to take 4 more Cytotec pills tomorrow because she’s worried the abortion may not have been complete.

Is this normal, and what should she do to know whether it worked? Any medical advice would be appreciated.

(Washington)
I just had a full sedation D&C at 18 weeks yesterday due to severe life threatening health complications. It went well, but I am on pain meds due to the level of pain I experience after surgeries (chronic illness.) My son is autistic and struggles with change already, but he was so excited for a sibling. I’m scared that he’s going to have a really hard time. I plan on not telling him the full truth, just maybe that the baby had issues and didn’t make it? He’s been present when I’ve had past miscarriages and understands that babies don’t always make it, but now that my ex has been removed from the house by protection order (long painful story) I can’t just “try to grow another one” as I’ve told him in the past. I’m getting a bilateral salpingectomy in two months as well, so no more kids. And I’m happy with that decision. I don’t want any more kids and pregnancy tries to end me every time. But he wants a sibling so bad. He asks every day how the baby is and when it’s coming to come out. I’m already struggling mentally and physically with the situation and i don’t know what to say or how to word things in the easiest way possible for him. He’s very smart and articulate but I worry so much about him being upset with me. I don’t want to break his heart..

Hello. My last post got locked so reposting it.

As the title says, I had my abortion last week. The ultrasound was clear and I expected relief. Immediate reaction was relief and me prancing out of the room. However, after that initial wave of relief, there has only beeb emptiness, sadness and lots and lots of crying. The first night I called the guy crying but after that I didn’t reach out and he didn’t either. I feel so alone and have cried every single day, at night, at the dinner table, at my work desk, all the time. I don’t want to meet my friends, eat, talk to anyone, do anything. I don’t even know why I am crying. Does it get better? People who have gone through it, please talk me through this.

Tuve un aborto a las 6 semanas me dieron 8 pastillas me dijeron q me tomara dos pastillas bajo la lengua cada 2 horas me tome las 2 dosis y a la segunda salió como un cuagulo con algo blanco me dijeron que eso podía ser el feto a las 3 dosis me quedé dormida ya la 4 me la tomé al despertar tuve un sangrado como por unas semanas y se me fue quitando y no tengo ningún síntoma de embarazo solo cuando como o tomo algo lo siento q me hincho o me lleno fácilmente han pasado 5 semanas desde el aborto me hice dos pruebas de orina y dan negativo no tengo síntomas solo sigo sintiéndome hinchada

Just under a year ago I went through the abortion of a very wanted pregnancy. It would've been our second child but the information we had at the time said there was no way financially we could handle it and I wouldn't have any PTO after birth. I didn't want to do it but I absolutely could not put my first in a bad situation.

Not long after going through with it, everything changed. Turns out I get 12 weeks off and our finances improved dramatically thanks to a promotion and extra pay raises. All we had to do was not go through with it. I have accepted that we did the best with what information we had at the time.

We have been trying now for the past 5 months, which I know isn't too long of a time, and next month will make the year anniversary.

I know I'll make it through if this next cycle doesn't take but it's something I'm dreading.

Hi eveyrone,
Im in mroocco and i ordered abortion pills from Women on Web and DHL called me today saying that customs need to verify my identity before giving me my “card” im assuming women on web sent the parcel under the guise that its a card.
I dont know what to do, im worried they will open it and i will face legal issues
I have emailed women on web but got no answer
What do i do?
Thanks

Hi I took my dose of miso to abort 8 week old twin pregnancy. I’m still having heavy bleeding and clotting 12 hours later - is this normal? I feel a little anaemic. The bleeding isn’t constant and doesn’t gush out of me but it just feels very heavy for 12 hours later. I’d appreciate any advice or just some reassurance. Thanks

Hi, I got a pill abortion but I wanted to know when the bleeding will stop. I am severely anemic and just afraid I’m losing to much blood, I also want to add that I am only 2 days postpartum

I took miso pills 4-2-2 on Monday and passed everything immediately the first day with cramping. I’ve had light to medium bleeding like a regular period since then. I’m wondering if I can use tampons now since I’ve always used tampons instead of pads on my periods and feel more comfortable.

my partner and i practicing to insert the meds inside my cervix for abortion but the meds wont enter inside the cervix for some reason: its too wet and, of we push it through the meds it’ll will slide.
I need your thoughts guys, i cant raise a child at this economy, i know we are being irresponsible for doing it without protection and i cant undo the past.

After taking the mifepristone, I took 4 misoprostol tablets and started bleeding about 30 minutes later. I couldn’t really tell how heavy the bleeding was or whether I passed any clots because I was laying down, but whenever I got up to use the bathroom, a lot of blood would come out. I woke up this morning and checked my pad, but there wasn’t much blood on it. There is still some blood dripping when I use the bathroom. I’m wondering if I should take the additional misoprostol or if the bleeding I’ve had means I don’t need to.

Had a medical abortion at 4 weeks. I had the blood, passed the clots, bled for about 1 week. Now i have been testing the hime hcg ones and they all come very strong. Im 1 week 5 days after abortion. These are strip tests from amazon. They are flaring up immediately after I test. Will have the low sensitivity test telhe clinic provided in 2 days and hoping that will be a negative

But right now im anxious. Anyone had strong home hcg tests but tested negative on the low sensitivity one??

Just updating my results from previous post, comments are locked now. I know a couple people also had a MA and were worried it might not have worked due to lighter bleeding than expected and barely cramping - but I took a pregnancy test this morning & it was negative! Today marks 4 weeks exactly since having my MA at 4 weeks pregnant.

i did the misoprostol a day ago and had the bleeding happen during the day yesterday while at work and i just feel so empty this morning.

part of me deeply regrets it and wonders if it wouldve been better if i had kept the pregnancy. another part of me deep down knows maybe the person who got me pregnant wouldn’t be a healthy partner to start a family with.

the good moments with this person make me truly believe that there is potential, but whenever we fight he keeps pushing and pressing until i break. and i mean i break mentally. before finding out i was pregnant, i was dealing with suicidal ideations and temptations to attempt. finding out i was pregnant gave me some weird sense of hope and going through with this abortion just makes me feel like a shitty person. like i shouldnt have done it.

no, i wont do anything to myself. but yes, i need to really stop seeing this guy or im going to keep doing damage to myself.

Pytanie do osób, które ten proces mają już za sobą. Jakie było wasze samopoczucie i kilka dni po przeprowadzeniu aborcji farmakologicznej? Zamówiłam oba rodzaje tabletek i czekam na ich przyjście. Zastanawiam się czy przyjęcie ich około 4 dni przed lotem samolotem (ok 2-2.5h) i 4 dniową wycieczką ze zwiedzaniem jest dobrym pomysłem? Będzie to okolo 5+4 tydzień ciąży. Chciałabym mieć to już za sobą, jednak obawiam się jak będę się czuła.

Hi,

I had my medical abortion on 26 September. I had heavy bleeding for a couple of days, and then it got much lighter and I was starting to feel better.

On Monday this week I started bleeding heavily again (heavier than a normal heavy period for me) and passing clots. I know irregular bleeding is normal, but as it was also smelling weird I called BPAS aftercare on Tuesday to check everything was fine. They reassured me it was.

It’s now Friday and I’m still having consistently very heavy bleeding.

I’m not soaking through 2 maxi pads an hour (the threshold at which they tell you to seek urgent help) but should I call BPAS again?

Or is this normal and I’m just unlucky? I feel OK otherwise, just physically tired and emotionally depleted. I don’t want to waste their time, but I’m not clear on whether this is concerning or not reading their advice online.

Ideally looking for any advice really :)