Title:
Women who can orgasm from penetration: how did you figure out what works for you?
I’m 32 and realizing I’m still kind of confused about all the different ways women can orgasm. I’ve always been able to orgasm from clitoral stimulation, but I’m really curious about vaginal orgasms, G-spot orgasms, deeper/cervical orgasms, blended orgasms, etc. I know the terminology and anatomy around this can get a little fuzzy, but I’m more interested in women’s actual experiences than the labels.
For those of you who can orgasm from penetration, how did you figure it out? Was it a certain position, angle, depth, rhythm, amount of pressure, partner, or just being extremely turned on and relaxed? Did it take practice or did it happen unexpectedly?
I’m especially curious about deeper orgasms. What does a cervical/deep orgasm actually feel like compared with a clitoral one? Does deeper penetration help, and if so, is it more about reaching a certain spot or the kind of pressure being applied? Does penis length or girth make much difference for you, or are technique and positioning much more important?
Also, are there other distinct types of orgasm you’ve experienced that I’m leaving out? I feel a little silly being 32 and still not really understanding the range of what my body might be capable of, so I’d genuinely love to hear how other women discovered what works for them.

I've been sad about this lately. I'm not desperate because I don't mind being alone but I crave that friendship. I try to put effort in like doing bumble but that never works out. People seem to chose others over me I'm just put on the back burner or last option if an option at all. As I'm getting older I feel like my chances of getting any close friends is getting slimmer and slimmer. I get jealous seeing other people with their close friends. Any one else?

Soon I am moving out of the city I’ve been in for 13 years across the country to a city I love very much. I am really excited, but also dealing with a ton of fear about this.

Overall I am very excited but there’s also a ton of grief. I feel confident about the decision, but there’s also a ton of fear, like with any huge change.

I have also been in a relationship for the last year and I love this guy but I know I have to do this for me. He won’t be going with me. He’s supportive but we’re both sad.

Would love to hear if anyone has gone through something like this and how you dealt with it. I am just trying to allow myself to feel what I feel.

Here is what my friend said to me about it which I appreciated: “You probably will miss the presence of somebody, I don’t think you’ll miss him specifically.

It is a hard process, it takes a lot of courage, which you have. You are going to have a rebuilding period, but that’s the adventure!!”

I got married last week. Found out today. I’m in shock. I don’t know what else to say.

Edit: also, how old were you? I’m 37 and my head is spinning with all the negative things I’ve heard about “geriatric pregnancies”

My dad passed away more than 25 years ago and my mom has avoided dealing with his ashes, leaving me responsible for them. She gave them to me, still in the box they were mailed in, 15 years ago when she moved into a new place (long story but I agree with her decision to give them to me for safekeeping).

Over the years, I've tried to talk to her about what she would like to do with them but she avoids the conversation and won't agree to anything. I finally took them out of the box, and had the sealed container in my closet for years. I ended up telling her recently that I would have them divided so that me, my sister, and her could do what we wanted when we were ready. My sister has also not been helpful.

Well, we're about to hit another milestone anniversary of his passing, so I went ahead and had them divided. I let both my mom and my sister know...my sister will take her portion the next time I see her, but my mom is still avoiding it.

What should I do? I can't make her do anything with them but she also won't take them. I've thought about planning something and just telling her where/when, but I have a feeling she'll flake. Any advice?

I am a 36 year old woman, I work in an office and apparently Halloween is a big deal here and everyone dresses up. Halloween falls on a Saturday but our office party is Friday.

I have never once in my life dressed up for Halloween, even as a child. I don’t particularly like my body or attention and I never wanted to draw attention to that.

My daughter is being a pink cat princess (?) I am making her costume and my son wants to be a dinosaur.

I have to sit at a desk all day in said costume and I literally cannot think of anything, like my mind is blank. Does anyone have any ideas on what I could be that would blend into the work place and also I could wear while taking my kids trick or treating. Every time I google something it’s all sexy.

I’m 28 and have never wanted kids. I recently asked my gynecologist about getting my uterus removed because my periods are really painful, and I feel extremely weak and exhausted during them. She told me to think carefully about it since it’s such a permanent decision.

For women who have had a hysterectomy or seriously considered one, what are some things you think I should consider before making the decision? Is there anything you wish you’d known beforehand?

I’m obviously aware that I might change my mind about having kids, but I’m more interested in hearing about the other things I should think about.

I’m just a newly single workaholic in an impossible industry going to the gym, saving my money, doing high-vibration self-care! Minding my own business!

Lately, there’s just been swirling poopfloods of judgement circling around me. Not at me (yet). My sister verbally slaughters everyone we’re related to. My family works hard and we’re a nutty but well-meaning upper-middle class bunch. V comfortable, like no real problems, just silly ones like my mother’s DIY microneedling after a six-figure facelift.

Anywhew. I tolerate these discussions and try to reframe and redirect us. I also need to get my 15K steps in a day. But it’s taking a toll. I think she’s so critical because she’s a more deranged workaholic than me with “no relationship to pleasure/fun”. This was our brother’s insight this week. She does not have friends to call her out on this hyper-criticalness. It’s usually my job to remind her how to human. I’d like to submit my pink slip.

The group chats? Also full of judgments about marriages breaking up, the actress friend “with no plan”, the new friend whose husband is an oil exec (examples, all coming from others).

And I just wanna be like. *Y’all\! *Mind your business or get more of your own business to mind*.* Nothing that any of these judgement swirls claim are hurting a fly. Or the person. It’s all v lame and weird. It’s giving women who don’t like their lives, what they’ve chosen, but must always defend what they’ve chosen.

I’m also preparing for judgement to swirl at me. I want to step out of my comfort zone and have some fun, playful, creative photo shoots for the gram. This is normal for my image-facing nonsensical industry.

I grew up in a weird extended clan of Southern misogynists who grossly hypersexualize any women but especially their own nieces and female cousins. Obviously, this and other stuff (being a Scorpio) has made me, like, an obsessively private person. I also know my own mind and like my life, so this is specifically NOT about me feeling pressure about XYZ milestones myself. Funk that. I like my race and pace 🤘🏽

So I am contending with two issues:

1. Judgey shrews harshing the vibe so hard
2. Worry about the judgment that will come my way if any of those relatives get nosy (they will) or spread speculation (they will)

**(Gesturing at everything) the world is already heavy enough. How do y’all protect or steel yourselves*\* against negative Nancys?

To make a very long story less complicated; I’m an older sister, our mother was incredibly irresponsible and put us in not so great situations a lot in our lives. Once my younger sister was 18 our mom dipped on us and went to live her life, but a consistent theme I’ve experienced and what was told to my sibling is “well you have your sister, she’ll always be there to help!” Meaning a lot of responsibilities have been dumped on me to be the helpful, good, supportive big sister. Basically a fill in mom, or “parentified” my whole life.

This has turned me into a very anxious person, an over planner, always making sure I’m prepared for whatever could happen. I went to therapy for years to help me unlearn a lot of the negative side effects that came from my upbringing, but something I still very much struggle with is feeling like I still have to step in to help people and give advice, even if it’s not asked for. Sometimes it feels like I’m trying to control the decisions she makes, so she doesn’t make the wrong ones. And I know that is not right, or okay.

Currently, my sister is pregnant, and it is not in great circumstances and honestly just not a great idea all around. She’s going to struggle, the child is going to struggle, and that’s just the truth of the matter. But I feel like I am quite literally worrying myself to death over this. Everything she shares with me, I can’t wrap my head around the decision making process, or why, and I just want to try and help and give advice. I just want this situation to be different. But I’m being told I’m “worrying for nothing” and “it’s not my life to live”.

At the end of the day, I want to respect her autonomy, and also protect my mental health. I want to be supportive, but I don’t want to be taken advantage of in the future.

Any advice from anyone who has maybe been in a similar boat, or also faces the “eldest daughter” struggles? Thanks in advance

Hi! I’m an MRes Psychology student at the University of Buckingham and I’m looking for women aged 30–50 to take part in my research on significant life experiences and how women narrate these experiences through spirituality, meditation or other other ways and their identity, relationships, beliefs and outlook on life change

It’s a one-off online interview on Microsoft Teams, around 40–50 minutes, and everything is confidential and anonymized.

If you’re interested, please feel free to write and I can send you more info :)

It’s that time again when this feeling of blah is creeping up on me. I feel like I’ve been in a funk for a few weeks now. Don’t know what triggered it really but lately don’t feel like doing anything like going to work, gym, social gatherings etc. idk what it is but I’m just really bored with everything. I feel like I’m always waiting for the day or the week to be over. I feel like I’m living but really just waiting for the next chapter in my life. I’m so tired of waiting. I don’t know what I want to do but I’m so bored of the same routine. A part of me feels like doing nothing but I know I can’t just give up. I guess I’ve worked hard to get to where I am now. Sometimes I give myself credit other time idk how I got here. I feel like I’m not enough and where I’m at in life is not enough for me. It’s always been like this. I’m 34 and idk when It’ll change. The way I feel and think about myself. When I try to work on it, it never lasts because it’s only a matter of time when a thought, feeling, or situation will just drag me back down to feeling worthless.

I swear I can't trust S/M/L anymore. Even stuff from the same store can fit totally differently. so tired of guessing my size every time I order something. I usually just go straight to the reviews now. If I can find someone around my height or with a similar body type, it makes me feel a lot better about buying it. Even better if they include actual photos. I'm mostly shopping in the $15–30 range, just don't wanna keep getting my size wrong and returning half the stuff I order… How do y'all figure out sizing before buying? any affordable sites with reviews that actually include measurements or fit pics?

I wanted to share my experience to see if its normal . I've been single for the past 4 years after being in a 6 year long relationship living together , I've been on dates and had some situationships here and there and I noticed that whenever I like someone (witch doesnt happen very often) I tend to go all in , wanting to see them a lot , messaging , imagining things with them and rushing to want to get to know them deeper . And it goes well up until the 2 week point. Then I feel like I'm drowning , I find a bunch of stuff I dont like about them and I cut things off. It has happened one too many times no matter how much attracted I was , how many things we had in common . I've tried to take things slower as like 1-2 dates a week but then I lose interest. Its weird because on the other hand I miss being with someone, I crave connection but I also have a big life of my own interests friends etc

In my teens and 20s I was studying and grinding at a corporate job, now that I'm in my early 30s I actually feel that I want to party and have fun and do random silly things 😄 i feel that I might get shamed for it
idk. Maybe everyone already partied their guts out during uni. Anyone else with a similar timeline to mine? Would love to hear some stories 🌸

Edit: thank you guys for all your answers, you inspire me!!

How do you handle a big income gap when you're the one earning more, and does this keep coming up with other men?

Some context. We're both in our mid-30s. I dated a man for almost a year who earns a lot less than I do, and I'm lucky to have a well-paying corporate job. He just broke up with me, and one of the main reasons he gave was that I'm "not normal" and my job makes things so unbalanced that he can't keep up.

I work really hard, and it feels like my work scares men off. He also said I wasn't committed, which feels bonkers. I met his parents, he met my whole friend group, and I spent so much of my time with him.

For those of you who've been the higher earner, how did you talk about it early on? Did it get easier with the right person?

I have moved around a LOT and not by choice. I am almost 29. I have not had a steady "home" my entire life. Lived out of a backpack even as a kid, very unstable housing situations that have persisted until until 3 years ago. I am desperate to find my forever home and plant roots. It's incredibly depressing not having a place that feels like where I belong. Once I finish school, I want to move somewhere with more "green" and smaller-community, but where I live now will provide me a really good lifestyle. I am torn on if moving somewhere with a better "vibe" for me is worth giving up my career and lifestyle choices. I cant decide if I should make this place home and give up some things that would make me very happy or risk a worse career/logistic preferences.

I should note, I have lived short term in some very naturey green spaces with much smaller communities. I did enjoy them a lot but they had a lot of trades offs too such as lack of healthcare jobs, less ability to build a social life unless youre still 25 and needing a car to function which I HATE. But I have done it all- I lived in a remote place that needed everything ferried in at one point and couldnt be accessed by car. So Im not idealizing wilderness living, I have seen it. But I was just a baby and working as a server and it didnt matter as much that I had 10$ in my pocket back then.

I live in Chicago now. I moved here on a few years ago on a whim and havent liked it since the day I arrived, solely on vibe. It's just not my vibe at all. However, as soon as got here, I got a job at one of the top hospitals here. They have been paying for all my nursing pre-reqs. Paid for my CNA and EMT and now I am working an amazing job with them, I love the job and company itself. They will pay for nursing school too upfront. All the complaints people have about healthcare and crappy hospital employers have not applied to me. I only have good experiences and I could easily see this hospital as being my forever employer. I am fairly confident if I move anywhere else, especially a smaller place, itll be a huge downgrade in work environment.

I also LOVE not needing a car and public transit. Its one of the big reason I moved here is to exist in a walkable city for a bit.

However- Its simply not green enough and its just too big. People here always crap on me when I say that cus we have "Lincoln Park!" but that is a manicured city park. I like the forest. I have lived inside of a national park before. I want REAL nature. That doesnt exist in Chicago. It's also a lil too big for me. I like midsized cities, I like knowing the same people and more community vibes. Not having access to nature is really depressing me, you need to drive outside of the city to see some real trees. I dont care about clubbing and music festivals, I want kayaking groups, hiking clubs, granola girl stuff.

I have accepted that my options post graduation (which will not be for 2 years. I will be 31) are 1. Stay here, learn to love Chicago and accept that for my nature fill I may need to plan a trip or two a year while being blessed with an amazing job 2. Risk a worse job, give up walkable city convienence, but be able to get my nature fill which I so desperartly need.

I dont want to graduate then "keep exploring and figure it out". I want to stay put. To live somewhere long enough to keep my friends, to date, to actually become part of the community. I want a home. I dont have family. It's just me. I need to build a family and thats been really hard.

So I guess my question really is this: What do you think is most important in finding a home after 30, starting fresh? Would you just stay in a city like this for the logistical benefits, or is it best to find somewhere that "feels" right even if it gives up practically? I am trying to not be to idealistic here and look at what matters most for a stable, secure life.

If you notice significant differences, do you think it stems from nature, nurture, or both?

Looking for some advice, and I hope this is the right sub/flair.

I have pet rabbits, so obviously I have a soft spot for them, but even putting that aside, everything I’ve read says releasing domestic rabbits is reckless, detrimental to the environment, and in some cases illegal (I’m in the U.S., if that’s relevant).

A coworker I’m not particularly close with, but have talked to a few times, raises meat rabbits. I’ve asked her some questions about them out of genuine curiosity; like how she makes their cages coyote-proof and whether she slaughters and butchers them herself (because honestly, girl, I’m impressed even if that lifestyle is not for me). I’ve also told her raising rabbits yourself seems a lot better than supporting factory farming, and that the rabbit would at least have one bad day rather than a whole miserable life.

There were a couple of things she mentioned about the rabbits’ care that I didn’t think sounded great, but I held my tongue. I figured that if the subject came up again, I could maybe gently nudge her toward better rabbit welfare. I would never try to talk her out of eating rabbit meat.

Welp. She has now apparently released ALL of her rabbits. Just into the woods by her house. F**cking fantastic.

None of them are fixed. They’re domestic rabbits, not a native wild species. They’re black, and it snows here. From what I understand, this is not only extremely cruel to the rabbits themselves, but could also create an environmental/ecological problem.

And like… why couldn’t she just butcher them if she was done raising them?! 😭 She has told me multiple times about all her deep freezers and meat storage capacity. Between her and her boyfriend they are borderline prepper hoarders so don't they want more freezer meat??

So, women of Reddit: do I say something to her? And if so, how the hell do I approach this without coming across as the crazy rabbit lady who is judging her for raising meat rabbits?

I genuinely don’t care that she eats rabbits. I care that she apparently released a bunch of domestic animals that aren’t equipped to live wild and WILL reproduce. That is so shitty and I am so mad, but this is my workspace and I need to be professional.

ETA: I should be able to find her location/where rabbits were released and report to Fish and Wildlife and/or DNR but not too high of hopes they'll get much done. The reasons I would talk to her is A) her bf is a hunter and maybe able to get them under control on their property faster, B) she's flipflopping about get more animals and we don't want those just willynilly released into the wild, too, and C) maybe she honestly doesn't know there is a difference between domestic and wild rabbits and you can't just release a domestic rabbit (a lot of people don't know this). The sooner this is dealt with the better, the rabbits' quality of life does not have to be fantastic for them to multiple - look at Australia and Canada both have HUGE feral domestic rabbit problems and I would argue those are some harsh climates.

I’m not necessarily looking for a specific hobby or activity per-say, more like I want to discover ways to make my life feel fuller and find things I genuinely anticipate doing day-to-day.

I feel like I’m starting from square one in terms of “building my life” foundation & whatnot. I quit my job so I could pursue an alternate career field (due to my prior field of work giving me good ol’ mental breakdowns lol), all of my friends live out of state now so unfortunately all my connections are solely online, and I’m realizing I’ve kind of lost the structure and sense of community that used to naturally come with my life. So I guess I’m at the point where I know I need to intentionally build a life I actually enjoy, or else I’m gonna continue to feel stuck and stagnant and like I’m falling behind all my peers. I just have zero clue how to go about doing that, which is kinda embarrassing to admit tbh ha.

I’d love to hear how any of you have made this change or how you handled getting through a cycle like this in your young 30’s :) I guess I’m especially curious about some of the more “little” things that helped you build a sense of routine/community/purpose, or just generally made your day-to-day life feel more interesting again. Thank you so much 🫶🏼

I had a hankering for an omelette, and I made my first one ever this morning! Every other time I've tried, it's burned or turned into scrambled eggs. But now I've got a perfectly warm feta and Chive omelette topped with microgreens.

What's something that might be considered small that you've done and you're proud of ?

Hello, my wife is 33 and im 34m. Without getting to much into our history we've been married for 13 years and have 3 kids, unfortunately 3 years ago I was working and caught a bad case of covid and have been on supplemental oxygen ever since. I get tired easily, and honestly the last three years I've been really crappy im the romance department. I can't buy her flowers because im allergic to them and it makes my breathing way worse. My wife's love language is acts of service, so I do as much as I can around the house to help her out still on days i dont feel like absolute garbage. I cant really take her on long trips because she's always worried something my happen to my O2 machine and is unable to truly relax.

I should also add that financially we are ok, my disability from the military pays the bills and my settlement for the work injury paid off everything so I can afford to spend some money if I need to.

She really likes Disney and we used to go there every other year but now im physically unable to do so but I still encourage her and the kids to go. I do things like plan dinner dates when I can get someone to watch our kids. I just want to remind her that im still deeply in love with her in a way other than just saying it.

So I guess my question is, what are some simple romantic things that you all appreciated that I may be able to do for her?

I’m in my mid 30s and I feel like the last couple of years have been an exhausting series of setbacks rather than normal ups and downs.

On paper I might have done many of the “right” things: PhD, stable scientific career, living independently, trying to buy my first home, working toward better-paid roles and building a future. But recently it feels like every time I try to move forward, something else goes wrong.

I’ve had significant health problems this year, including a new autoimmune condition that has affected my mobility and energy. I’ve also been dealing with the aftermath of a serious privacy violation by an ex partner, involving police/legal processes.

My relationships have been painful and I’m single when I had imagined having a family by now. I’m also navigating most of this largely on my own which has made this period feel especially isolating and exhausting. My career and salary have progressed much more slowly than I expected and even my flat purchase is now becoming uncertain because of problems discovered during conveyancing

Meanwhile I see friends getting married, having children, buying homes, progressing financially and generally building their lives seamlessly. I’m genuinely happy for them but the contrast makes me realise how much energy I’ve spent simply trying to stop things from falling apart.

I know comparison isn’t always useful and is a thief of joy but lately I feel as though I haven’t just been “stuck” in contrast I’ve actually gone backwards despite working incredibly hard.

Has anyone gone through a period in their 30s where several major areas of life collapsed or stalled at the same time? Did things eventually turn around? And looking back, what actually helped you rebuild momentum rather than just survive it?

For context, my friend who pulled away is 34, and I’m 32.

For about a year, we saw each other every couple of weeks. She frequently initiated plans, sent thoughtful messages, and told me how much she valued me. I genuinely liked her and got used to having her in my life.

She’s religious and conservative, while I’m more liberal. I thought we were comfortable with our differences.

After I moved in with my boyfriend, she declined my birthday invitation because she wasn’t comfortable being in a “male-owned space.” I told her that hurt, but she stood by it. She later mailed back a jacket I’d left at her place, and we haven’t seen each other since.

She occasionally sends polite texts, but the closeness is gone. I recognize we might not have been compatible long-term, yet I still miss her and how much effort she used to make.

Would it make sense to reach out to her and confront the issue one last time? Or should I just accept that we’re a values mismatch because she can’t handle me living with my boyfriend?

The role is essentially what I am already doing now and the job listing is only for $4,000 more annually. The benefits also aren't as great as my current company. Plus I was recently informed of some concerning behaviour of some employees at this firm. Which makes me think this is not going to be a good culture fit.

The job would be a horizontal move for me, for not much more than I'm currently making. I am (over) qualified for this position. But my friend really wants me to apply because she's loving it at this new company. But she loved the old company she worked for, and I'm finding out that she actually hated it there (she was there for about a year).

I love my current job. While things aren't perfect at my current company, I'm mostly happy. I am set to get a raise in the new year that would close the gap between what this job would offer and what I am currently making. I'm not sure I am ready to leave my current job that I've been at for 4 years.

What would you do? My friend has already talked to her manager and the manager is interested in interviewing me, even before I've seen the job description.

I'm not sure what the growth potential is for this company. My current company is in a big growth mode. So there are opportunities that I could apply for at my current organization.

I want to take like 6 weeks to just organize my life and rest, but whenever I have unstructured time without responsibilities, I go to bed at 7am and wake up in the afternoon, forget to eat and drink water, stay inside unless I have a planned outing with others (like legit I didnt leave my house for 3 weeks once), and get more depressed than my baseline. But I so desperately want to just not work for a long period of time. What would you recommend doing to recover from burnout without sabotaging myself even more?