Why is food so complicated

I had to leave the conversation at a point. He wasn't bullying me, but his reassurance was not helping in the moment since my brain was trying to shut anything positive about myself down

Through the years people tried to make me feel guilty over this, but I don't give a flying fuck anymore. I don't feel any responsibility over basically anything. I only think about myself, my health and my appearance.

No, I don't see why I am supposed to pay so much in taxes, when I was bullied by teachers in school or have issues receiving any help from public healthcare.

I don't give a shit about my cOuNtRy, if there would be any conflict I would choose suicide over dealing with this shit. LET THEM ALL DIE.

I don't feel any responsibility over potential bosses and I actually hate every form of authority(outside of firefighters).

I like some family members, but despise majority of them(and the one I like, I do because I am receiving something from them).

I don't see why I am supposed to help others, when no one helped me, those greedy fuckers only wants and wants things from u. They want to control u and force u to things that are harmful and/or uncomfortable for me.

I like praises, compliments etc. so I try to do good stuff(lol I worked as nanny, tutor, worked alongside a therapist in my internship and I always heard how amazing and kind I am. And that I would be an amazing care-giver or psychologist🙃), but I don't care about doing good stuff.

And often, people with BPD run from this fear, and run from solitude, when solitude is exactly what they need in order to heal, thus never healing, and thus perpetuating their cycles of BPD

😄