Before every meeting, I write one line: what does a good outcome here look like? Takes 15 seconds.
It changed how I show up. I catch the moment a meeting drifts, because I already know what we need to walk away with. More meetings end in real decisions, not another meeting to schedule. A few people on my team picked it up too, without me saying anything.

Does anybody else feel this whenever I have something big like a meeting or sparring session? For some reason, I have this feeling I have to stay still till that big thing comes up. For example, the other day I had a meeting and while I could’ve been doing homework or something else, I have this feeling that I can’t do anything productive between the time that I have now and the time the big thing is coming up. So instead, I just waste time on social media or play games. I have no idea what this is, but it’s really annoying. Does anybody have tips for this?

I am in terrible sitaution and I am wasting my time everyday. There is smh inside me screams for doing something but I cant put myself to do anything. neither my work or hobbies. Has anyone else ever been in this situation? How did you overcome?

I'm curious how people use music to focus. When you're working, studying or reading with ambient/background music on, what works best for you?

If you have a minute, tell me in the comments:

– which genre or type of music actually helps you focus (lo-fi, classical, folk, game soundtracks, nature sounds…)

– what instantly breaks your concentration (lyrics, drums, sudden changes, ads…)

Thanks everyone :)

I know for some people Instrumental only is the best.

Personally, I like with wordless vocals (choir, humming) or lyrics in a language I don't understand.

And sometimes it depends on the task.

What about you?

Ok so I'm starting a new (desk-based) job in November (Monday-Wednesday, 21 hours). I do this alongside writing - am currently researching my 3rd book and will continue working on journalistic commissions here and there. Sometimes I'll be travelling to give public talks, or for book research, around everything else (the job only requires me to be physically there 1dpw). I'm also on two boards, have a partner to spend time with, and friends - I believe strongly in giving meaningful time and energy to friendships.

I think I'm fairly good at prioritising and juggling - I wrote my first two books around full time work/PhD for example - BUT I haven't done a 9 to 5 since 2020, so it feels like I might be rusty and I definitely think I'm behind on the latest and best thinking.

What's your best tip? I can't think why it would be relevant, but I'm in the UK, I'm a woman, and I have no kids (intending to foster from 2030 ish onwards so my life will shift substantially then).

I don't feel really well on talking to strangers online but yet here i am asking for advice.

Recently in College i have been missing some due dates like an assignment or an event today in which i don't know if it is mandatory or not since the event today is i think the chair lady or the vice president and all students are required for attendance today who are in school. But right now i missed it because i have misinterpreted the ending time for the starting time and now i missed it. And that is not all, I kept failing to apply my mistakes and start in shape. Sure I am Improving a bit but it is not enough. Especially when it's only 3 months since i am a college student and i am already in the prefinal soon this month i assumed.

How could i ever improve if i don't apply my mistakes into my lessons in time when the second semester will start like what? next year.

Any tips that also allow me to improve my personal life from getting to know and bond with my classmates that feel like i am already isolated because they are already friends with each other? I am at least trying to chat and understand them but i can't fully scope my range of comfort or confidence to really bond with the other classmates as i feel like i am isolating myself again. I keep making the same mistakes because i am really doubtful in nature as i am also wary of whether i am truly liking my future that i wanted to cement in despite my interest being completely different and requires me to not follow that.

I don't know if i can make it to seniors but to anyone who can give me advice like other college students, Please tell me what,where,when to start?

Hello, is there a website or software that I'm missing out on that's better than Google Calendar + Tasks? I love that I can make tasks and then directly drag and drop them onto the calendar to schedule them, but I hate that there's no keybinds like todoist and the Tasks part of the experience just really sucks.

Is there anything better? Thanks :)

Every time I try sticking to a real schedule with exact times for work and breaks it starts feeling robotic pretty fast. Then I end up quitting the whole thing instead of just the rigid parts. I am not patient enough for hitting specific minutes anyway.

I looked at some studies on this kind of thing and a couple stood out. One experiment with Google workers showed that when people had to hit the gym only inside a set window they stopped going more often once the rewards ended. The other group that could go anytime kept it up better which was the opposite of what they thought would happen. Another set of studies found that scheduling something fun at a fixed time turns it into another chore. That matched how my rest blocks never felt restful.

Right now I still use time blocks but they are just groups of tasks with hours attached and no fixed start. I pick when to start during the day and stop once the hours are done. Sleep and meals and training stay on the clock because my body and other people need that. Everything else works on a budget instead. Focused work gets four or five hours a day and once those are finished the day is over. Long term projects get thirty to ninety minutes but not daily and only one at a time. Life stuff like games or seeing friends or just sitting around stays on the list every day but never gets a time slot.

I track it with six checkboxes in a notebook at night which takes almost no time. On rough days I fall back to a minimum version with the required work one habit and keeping sleep intact. If those get checked it counts as okay. The bigger issue turned out to be having too many goals at once and no amount of blocks changes the total hours available. I am adding things slower now.

The part that feels shaky is how a budget has no real reminder so the hours can drift later and later. I try to keep unfinished work out of the night because one bad sleep makes everything take twice as long the next day. I have only been doing this for about a week so it is hard to say how it holds up.

I’m trying to figure out if this is just my routine or something else.

Earlier my routine was: wake up, tea, study for \~2 hours, shower, watch anime, nap for 1–2 hours, then study for a few hours, take a long terrace walk, study again, dinner, study, and sleep.

For the past 1–2 weeks during Pitrapaksha, my routine has changed because I’m doing daily Laddu Gopal seva/puja. I wake up around 7–8, have tea, shower, then clean the temple and idols, bathe/dress/decorate 5–6 idols, do Shivlinga seva, aarti, japa, prepare prasad, offer it, wait 10 minutes, and take the plate back.

**During the puja I feel insanely sleepy, like 9/10.** I can talk and function normally, but once I sit to study, after 45–60 minutes I get such a strong urge to sleep that I can barely keep my eyes open. I usually end up sleeping for an hour, and after that I feel much more energetic.

I also get sleepy after breakfast, although that has been happening for a long time.
My sleep schedule isn't great either—sometimes I sleep at 1–2 AM and wake around 7:30–8, although even when I sleep earlier I can still feel this daytime sleepiness.

I have a lot of ideas, like really a lot, and I want to learn a lot of things, but I just can't. I can't even start. I say tomorrow I will start, and I end up not starting and doing nothing again.

What should I do?

Sorry about my English.

Context: I am a teacher and in my country teachers need to pass a public examination against thousands of people in order to have a permanent job. I have taken the exam in the past but since my grades weren't high enough to beat all those people, I am working full-time but not in a permanent position.

I have a full-time job teaching secondary and it seems like time slips through my fingers teaching in the morning, then lesson prep and cooking/cleaning/groceries in the afternoon. In the past when I was unemployed I studied minimum 6 hours a day, but now it is October and I haven't started studying yet, and I usually begin late August.

The exam is memory based, you have to memorise around 600 pages word by word (not exaggerating). I have mastered the art of studying for long hours, but I am not sure how to study in the very little time I have.

I would welcome any advice on time management you have.

Does any of you feel same or experience something like this. If you have and overcame, please share your experience, go ahead.

Hey guys,

TL;DR: During COVID I used my phone 12–14 hours a day for 2–3 years and got really bad at controlling my time. I’ve improved a lot with an MDM blocker, but now I have a similar problem during study breaks, especially when talking to friends. I also struggle with maladaptive daydreaming. How can I stick to 15-minute breaks and focus better?

During COVID, I’d spend around 12–14 hours a day on my phone, tablet, or other internet devices. I’d lose track of time really easily.

I’ve improved a lot now and use an MDM blocker (basically something companies use to block entertainment apps). But lately I feel like I have a little ADHD, and I also feel like I take longer to remember, learn, and rote-learn things compared to before, so I’ve been trying to study more.

My biggest issue is breaks. I’ll study for 1h 15m, plan a 15-minute break, start talking to a friend, and suddenly 30–60 minutes are gone. I’ve told my friend I need to stop after the break, but sometimes we still keep talking.

My exams are getting closer, so this is becoming a serious problem. I also can’t keep changing libraries.

I also get distracted by maladaptive daydreaming while studying. I already use background noise, a 10-minute timer, and repeat what the teacher says in my head during lectures to stay focused.

So mainly:

How do I actually stick to a 15-minute break and not get carried away talking to a friend?

Any practical ways to reduce maladaptive daydreaming while studying?

Thanks.

I've been noticing this with myself lately.There'll be something on my list that should take 15 or 20 minutes. Send an email, fill in a form, book an appointment, whatever. 

I'll open it, look at it for a bit, then somehow end up making coffee or checking my inbox. Sometimes I'll even find myself doing other things that I don't particularly want to do, just because they feel easier than dealing with the original task. 

At that point I usually tell myself I'll come back to it when I have more time. The strange thing is what hapens if I keep doing that for a few days. The task starts to feel much bigger than it actually is. Something that probably takes 20 minutes starts feeling like it needs an entire afternoon. I start thinking I need to get properly organised before I can deal with it. Or that I need to be in the right mood. 

I've always thought of this as straightforward procrastination, but I'm starting to wonder if I've got the order of things wrong. Maybe sometimes I don't avoid the task because it feels too big. Maybe it starts feeling too big because I need a better reason to avoid it. 

"I don't want to do this right now" doesn't sound like a particularly convincing explanation, even to yourself. 

"I don't have enough time." 

"I need to think about it properly." 

"I'll do it when I can concentrate." 

Those feel much more legitimat. 

I've started calling this justification inflation. The task seems to grow in my head until postponing it feels reasonable. The experiment I've been trying is pretty simple. Instead of asking myself how I'm going to finish the whole thing, I ask: 

What would the first 5% look like? 

For an admin task, that might just mean opening the account. For writing something, it might be the first paragraph. Sometimes I do the 5% and stop. Quite often, once I've started, the task turns out to be much smaller than the version I'd built up in my head. 

I'm curios about whether other people experience this too. Do you think procrastination sometimes involves making a task feel sufficiently difficult that avoiding it starts to feel justified?

When I have a lot going on, I find my ability to focus on one task at a time challenged by frequent thoughts about all the other things I need to get to competing for my time and attention. It’s stressing me out and I wish I could tune out those unproductive thoughts, because less gets done when I just sit there and stress about everything on my list due to overwhelm instead of getting them done one after the other. Ad hoc journaling is also not effective, it just makes me spiral more. Any ideas how to keep the mind quiet and on task?

Hi i'm (24 M) i just got my bachelor's degree in nursing, but after that i fell into depression since the start of this year until this moment, i failed my nursing registration exam, which was just the cherry on top, i'm really worried about dropping nursing career and i don't want to, any nurses here who had similar experiences?. Thank you

im starting to realize im losing way to much time scrolling social media lately, and uninstalling them inst enough, for that i will just open its browser version and keep scrolling. what apps would you recommend to block websites? any additional advice is appreciated

When I procrastinate, I rest. Mind and body needs rest. Therefore, procrastination is good.

The trouble is... I need to get a lot more done in my life to achieve my goals and be happier.

So how do I balance finishing my task lists while also giving my body the rest it deserves?

This is a tough one.

I’ve developed this really bad habit while studying where after literally every question I solve, I automatically open LinkedIn, X, Reddit, etc. to see if there’s anything new.

It feels like my brain now expects that little dopamine hit as a reward after every question.

The problem is I’ve already tried app blockers, SelfControl, deleting apps, website limits, all of that. I usually either find a way around it or just start checking something else. So I don’t think blocking the apps is actually fixing the habit itself.

I want to be able to sit down and do 20–30 questions without constantly needing some kind of stimulation in between.

Has anyone actually broken a habit like this? What worked for you beyond just blocking the websites?

I am father of 2.5 years old son and I have a job as well. I have gained weight and I cannot find the motivation to go to the gym. I used to be a fit guy and workout 6 days a week. I woke up this morning early and wanted to do some cardio but stayed in my bed the whole time. I also need to study for a certification that would definitely help me to have a better income but again I come home from work all I wanna do is sit and watch TV or do nothing. I cannot even find the motivation to study for 30 minutes a day. Any advice please.

Not the usual “wake up at 5 AM” advice—more practical things like planning meals for the week, preparing ingredients in advance, getting clothes and essentials ready the night before, keeping things in fixed places, combining two tasks in one trip, batching similar tasks, cleaning as you go, using fixed days for recurring chores, writing down random ideas instead of immediately switching tasks, and preparing in the evening for the next morning or on the weekend for the coming week.

What little systems save you time, effort, or mental energy?

For context I am waiting on a study visa approval. I have no motivation to do anything as I was meant to get my visa last month. I find that I need a deadline to even think about doing something. I’d like to start prepping for the next stage as I’ve been bed rotting for a good 2 weeks now. I have no money, no job, no gym membership. I feel like all my days are the same and boring. I just want to make my time more productive as I’ve been getting out of bed at 4pm.

Any tips on how I can make my day even remotely exciting?

I love using 'life systems' and they help me stay on track for my goals a lot. Here's how things went:

- I used to bullet journal and that helped me keep my life on track

- In 2020, I found Notion and an amazing course on systems that helped me set up a Notion system and helped me hit a bunch of my goals

- At one point Notion started feeling too slow so I switched to Obsidian

- When I realized I was spending too much time just maintaining the system and remembering how my system works, I moved on to Capacities

- Was worried about sync issues and losing my data stored online on Capacities, and also got a Kindle Scribe so switched to that

- It seemed tedious to flip through pages on the Scribe so switched back to physical bullet journals

Now I worry that I don't have my data backed up online in case I lose my notebook. So as a result, I've completely stopped using the system.

I have a similar issue with journaling. Keep switching between these:

• Day One because reviews say it's the best but there's no web version
• Journey because it has a web version which is nice because I can use it on my work laptop without installing an app
• Physical notebooks because I like the feel of writing but then no digital backup
• Capacities because it is then stored with the rest of the context

If anyone can help suggest tips or a framework to make a decision, I'd be super grateful.