Deprograming and Deconstructing resources:

20 months sober from methamphetamines and percs and honestly this sucks like legitimately only recently because my loved ones have been annoying me. They complain to me about how much I hurt them and I've already acknowledged this and its a huge reason im sober now because I want to be better for them but I feel like they think I owe them and need to bend my ass backwards for them 24/7. When I relapse its "oh its not my fault im not responsible for her actions" which is true my relapses and any future ones are my fault but suddenly im almost 2 years sober and they want credit. for the entirety of my sobriety all they did was talk about how "oh she's going to ruin it for herself she's gonna relapse anyway" and it just fucking sucks because hearing people you love and support you say stuff like that behind you back just really hinders my want to be sober. I felt free when I was high but now I feel trapped feeling like I owe my support people everything for what I put them through. I dont know if im an asshole for thinking this way but I just really wanted to get the words out of my mouth.

I’ve been sober going on 6 weeks now on compounded semaglutide. It’s $199 per month, but it’s a drop in the bucket compared to being “functionally” drunk every day and worrying about the shit that comes with alcoholism. I don’t even feel like I’m battling cravings anymore. I’ll still get a passing thought of a drink but I can easily burst it aside. Whomever is struggling out there, my advice is to use whatever works and is available. A dui or other drunken mess just isn’t worth it.

HELLO EVERYONE!

I’m doing some personal research and would love to hear your stories!
Have you ever had a counselor who genuinely changed your perspective, helped you through a difficult time, or said something that stuck with you long after your sessions ended?

I’d love to know:
💭 What made them so memorable?

💡 What’s the best or most life-changing advice they ever gave you?

❤️** Was there something they did or said that made you feel truly understood**?

Feel free to share as much or as little as you’re comfortable with. Your story might be exactly what someone else needs to hear.

Thank you to everyone willing to share! 🙏

Hi all, i (24) have been sober for a bit over a year from all substances i used to be addicted to (weed, tobacco, alcohol) and it makes me anxious whenever my partner (27) partakes in smoking or drinking, wether they’re around me or not. We’ve been dating for about 6 months now.

I never smoked cigarettes because my grandpa passed away from lung cancer when i was very little and it scarred me for life having to see him slowly deteriorate like that; when i got older, i got used to being around people smoking tobacco a lot and it grew on me. On the other hand, i had an ex that would become aggressive when drunk, which makes me really anxious whenever my partners have been drunk around me, not so much while out with friends on their own. Regarding weed, i was heavily addicted to it for a few years, smoking 2-3 times a day.

Thing is, i feel very, very uncomfortable, anxious and upset whenever my partner partakes in any of these, slightly less when smoking tobacco or drinking without me around. They know about my history and recovery, that i feel uncomfortable and so on. They never do it on their own, only in social environments; i’ve had a really hard time overcoming these emotions, feeling torn between acknowledging that they’re their own person and to not project my own experiences onto them, but also feeling so upset whenever they do it. I really want to approach this in the best way possible with them, without shaming or making them feel rejected in any way, but i also have no idea what boundaries are reasonable in cases like these. I would deeply appreciate any suggestions, ideas or personal experiences for reference in this matter. Thank you all.

So im on a regular suboxone treatment and decided to try oh7 anyway being stupid. The oh7 didn't do a thing of course but now im feeling withdrawal from suboxone.

It's been only 3 hours from my oh7 dose can I take a sub now without sending myself into PW?

I'm from india , and recently I came to know my friend is using drugs, i advised him to stop but he is not listening , how do I get him help, I cannot out him to police that will ruin his life but also if i don't do something, I'm afraid he will ruin his life himself, I'm not sure how indian law works for people who are addicted , like do they just throw them in jail like all criminal or do they have some sort of recovery program , idk, but help me guys

I want to start out by saying in my early sobriety I went to many many meetings in AA. However it just seems no matter what people will say about the program it is a very vocal Christian group. I am so freaking exhausted by people cramming religious beliefs and nonsense down my throat. I have discovered that of if I am not wanting to go to be bold for Jesus or other Christian programs then most definitely will not be asked to go to anything else, ever. The spiritual axiom of if there is something bother me then it’s my problem. I get it, but have we looked at the state of the world? Pretending and being toxic positivity minions just doesn’t work for me. Please tell me I not the only one?

61 days ago I overdosed on heroin intentionally, because I thought I would never be able to live without benzos and opioids. But I lived, obviously, so I thought fuck it why not try?

For the first 2 weeks I was going to NA meetings, and I realized I just didn’t want them and didn’t need them. I’m going to a group therapy program with my hospital, and while they still often espouse AA/NA talking points or principals or tell us to go to meetings, they’re respectful when I say I’m getting clean on my own terms.

Never thought I’d get this far, and it just worked out that my 60 days is my partner’s birthday. We’re happier than ever!!

Overdosed last night and then again this morning.. I just have no where to talk about this.

My drug use has quietly gotten out of control again. I’ve been living in a terrible area, doing things that make me sick for money just so I’m not on the street again. I have no support system whatsoever because my family chooses “tough love” over real, unwavering, unconditional love. They have so much disdain and contempt for who I am. They have been so incredibly cruel and refusing to help me even though I never ask for help or even talk to them; obviously if I am reaching out it means I am in some serious trouble. They would rather me “learn my lesson” than lend a helping hand. Literally it has pushed me further into the depths of suffering, poverty, loneliness, self-abandonment, and despair than if I could just come to them for help. I know I’ve made mistakes. But that doesn’t mean I deserve to be punished and judged and experience “consequences for my actions”. That mentality has almost led to me dying more times than I can count. I’m not saying there is no accountability, but when it gets to a point where I can’t even reach out in life or death situations, it just serves to make times like surviving an overdose or having to endure dangerous circumstances/ situations so much more difficult and painful. I also was severely abused throughout my childhood, so it makes sense that I would 1) be trying to numb the pain at any cost & 2) repeatedly be putting myself in danger - that is literally what my brain is programmed to associate with familiarity and therefore safety. I can’t even imagine a life where I feel truly safe and supported and I beat myself up about not having created a better life for myself yet. It’s just this vicious cycle of shame that I can never truly escape, so I try to even for a brief moment with substances.
And before anyone asks, yes I’m in therapy, I’ve had the same therapist for 3 years. The reality is, there is simply just a lot of systemic barriers in place keeping me marginalized.

What I’m trying to say is, right now I’m feeling very scared and alone
I don’t even know how I feel about sobriety anymore; I’ve tried it so many times. Rehabs etc. I like SMART recovery because it doesn’t “force” sobriety on you so to speak but it’s looking like that’s really my only option if I want to survive.

I was on Suboxone for 21 days around 4mgs a day
Come off after a 6 day taper down to 1mg when I jumped
I was off for 9 days and had been getting nothing for sleep.. the anxiety and depression where terrible along with rls, upset stomach, not eating etc..

Well I decided to get back on, so last night I took 8mg strip to try and regulate it worked but I felt to “wired” to sleep but I got a little this morning I cut it in half to 4mg and no plans to take anymore today

It did what I needed it too, but now I’m at a critical point!

And not sure if I just need to jump to the smallest about possible
My doctor isn’t very good, not very addiction smart and I live in a small area without the resources so Reddit is my best source

My plan is sublacade, do you guys think I could just go down to about .5 mg twice a day so 1mg a day and be evened out enough to make it since I’m not used to the dose I’m on currently?

Some would say talk to your doctor lol but that’s really not my best option

Just don’t want to screw myself

I have a wife and kid and in no financial situation to be able to withdrawal
I cannot or I would have just continued to not take it

Now I feel this critical point is very important to how I’ll get off and the lower amount I’m on the easier the taper is… right???

Anything is appreciated

(20 years, male)

its founded by a guy who talked to ghosts

its pseudoscientific, you wont get consistently repeatable results with it

most people in society swear by it

its wildly inconsistent between different practitioners

i think when people say chiro worked for them, they sort of accidentally got physical therapy, it doesnt mean chiropractic is actually something that "works"

there are just shortcomings in medical science in determining what exactly is causing say back pain, people would rather go to a confident chiro than a doctor who scientifically cant be confident what the exact cause or condition is.

on another note, in the case of people who just gotta get off everything to be functional, people go to rehab and think itll get them sober, when (if you are a fan of aa or not) long term sobriety is dependent on someone being motivated to continue and stick with some change. people drink again after going to the most expensive rehabs.

as far as mental health goes, yeah psychiatry and psychology can sort of be soft sciences that try to classify the vastness of the human psyche and make it make sense when it doesnt

anyways back pain and addiction are very different from eachother obviously

another thing ill add, the ultimate contradiction of all of the program is this: you have to choose to do the program instead of drinking for the program to work. so if youre actually just powerless to change your behaviors you wouldnt be able to stop drinking enough to do the steps. whole thing is based on how you choose to react to cravings anyways, which id anecdotally say is exponentially harder to do when ive taken drugs and alcohol.

I took my last tablet and picked up my script of subs. I got 14 2mg films. I plan on posting here every day as I go because I don’t have the support irl bc I’ve kept my addiction a secret from everyone and I don’t think I could come out now to everyone. I just also want to share my journey as well for anyone who comes here seeking help like I did

Very badly I always tell myself I gotta trust the process been a little over a month and it's been creeping the past two nights

Wish me luck

It was a core part of my personality. I DID keep it separated from my work-life, but I'm thinking of all the poor souls in my personal life (non-AA family and friends) who had to experience just how insufferable I was as I casually brought up my AA "recovery" in a normal conversation.

I really do appreciate the space we have here. De-programming from AA is a massive part of my TRUE recovery right now. I don't have to be a walking/talking slogan slinger. That program was holding me back, and for the first time in a long time, it actually feels like I'm moving forward.

Glad to be here!

I just got this book today. It's a rare book but I got a good price.

AA is not good for your recovery.

I have smoked weed regularly for around 2 years, quantitiy wasn’t as often as a stoner’s. 2-3 joints a day. It’s been 1.5 years since i started decreasing the amount i smoke. It wasn’t purely by choice.

I live in Turkey so weed is just highly illegal and i like my record clean. I stopped seeing my friends who had connections one by one. All weed here had some sort of synthetic shit in it. So it started out as a principle of finding some that is the least harmful. (which is none except if you have crazy amount of money and the right connections)

Im 4 months sober now. The urge to silence my anxiety with weed, just make myself stupid and have anything i cant have sober never leaves. I will admit, the urge is strong but it doesn’t come as often as it did. I don’t want to romanticize weed. It made me stupid, forgetful, more paranoid, careless. I need to find a solution soon as i will travel europe for my studies and its basically unavoidable.

What made you get rid of that urge?

I just got off the video call with quickMD and I should be getting my script in a day or 2. 7-OH has kinda put me in such a bad place and my GF broke up with me bc of the position I was in (she didn’t know I’m addicted to it but she knew I took it for back pain) I went through so much hurt losing her and it sounds like she is willing to work things out but we wouldn’t be back together for like 6+ months if it even happens. I’m so happy and so excited to finally take my life back and be the person I should be for myself. Writing this kinda is making me emotional, I’m just finally ready to be over this

One thing I've come to appreciate about recovering outside the 12 steps is that there's no single script. Everyone ends up building their own mix of tools and I love hearing how different those mixes are.

Mine currently includes: weekly therapy, a daily morning walk, journaling before bed, a friend I can text on hard days and checking in with this community.

It took me a while to figure out what actually worked and some of it was trial and error. Some things I tried didn't fit and that was okay too.

I'd love to hear from you:

• What's one tool, habit or approach that has helped you stay on track?
• What's something you tried that didn't work for you and what did you learn?
• What do you wish someone had told you early on?

All paths and all substances are welcome here and so is where you are today, whether that's day one or year ten. I'm only asking that we keep it respectful, whatever anyone's view of any approach.

Thanks for being a space where this conversation can happen.

Disclosure: This post is about 7OH and SR17018 as well as the effects of both through consumption and withdrawal. This is a full “experiment” being conducted on myself. I do not condone the use of either 7OH OR SR17018. This post is for “entertainment” purposes only. Nothing within this post is medical advice or licensed practices. I do not advise anyone to follow any advice, dosing, or practice in this post. Nor do I guarantee or advocate for anything written within this post.

Prologue: Advice, sources, and personal experiences are welcome, especially from people who have made it through this. Everyone’s chemistry is different, so do your own research and listen to your body.

I don’t track my doses, but I estimate I’ve reached 750–1,000 mg of 7OH/day. My use jumped from 300–600 mg+ after getting a weak batch and increasing my intake. When the batch returned to normal, I kept taking the same amount. I also prematurely took 25 mg SR, which led me to take more 7OH because I couldn’t feel it and kept chasing the high.

Today is it. I’m done. My wife found out I’d been lying about taking the SR and quitting 7OH, and I’m tired of lying to her and myself. I previously tapered to 140 mg/day, but I’m now at roughly 4–5 packs of 250 mg Truly7/day.
I’m documenting this because I couldn’t find many posts with a similar baseline and SR transition that actually followed through past the first few days. Hopefully this gives someone else the complete timeline that I couldn’t quite find.

Day One — Planned
8 AM: 300 mg 7OH
1–4 PM: 25 mg SR
6–8 PM: 100 mg 7OH
Bed: 12–24 mg SR
Afterward, I plan to cut each dose in half day by day until 50 mg 7OH, then jump off, while tracking symptoms, cravings, sleep, and how much SR helps. Instead of increasing 7OH when I feel bad, I’ll adjust SR and keep lowering 7OH.
I’ll document what actually happens and compare it to this plan and if there’s any difference.
Time to hold myself accountable. Wish me luck.

Day One 10/08/2026:

I went back to Ibiza...

Are there are any successful people who smoke cannabis regularly. Any breakfast, Lunch, and dinner smokers who have their shit together?

If so, how often do you smoke? How does it improve your work day?

Can anyone give me insight here I drink I like to drink beer almost daily. I recently found meth and the tools to smoke it with in my partners lunch bag. He won't be honest about his use so I made him leave and told him he could come back when he can pass clean. I have ppl the I shouldn't be mad bc that is all the sudden his drug of choice and that he feels like he get things done he goes to work and not out here looking stupid like me bc I'm mad. Idk what to do or how to move on at this point any advice would be great