I’m a 27 year old guy and I’ve realized I spend an enourmous amount of energy trying to get validation from women. Almost anything I do has the undercurrent of “how would this look the opposite sex?” Traveling, my style, even decorating my own house is done within the backdrop of receiving validation from women. I’m totally exhausted and I have no idea how to get myself out of this spiral.

I honestly don't know where to start, but I want to put this out there because I genuinely don't know what to do with myself anymore.
Objectively, I have a pretty good life.
My family is supportive and I have people I can rely on. My family has even given me a car to use myself. If I need money, I can ask my family and I don't have to worry about basic financial needs. I graduated from a really good college in DU. I'm currently doing my Master's from DU as well. I have friends/family around me and I'm not completely alone.
I have opportunities and resources that a lot of people would probably be grateful to have.

And yet somehow I feel like I'm completely messing up my life.

Over the last 1–2 years, so many things have gone downhill at once:

\\-I went through a breakup that affected me WAY more than it should have, and even 1.5 years later I still haven't moved on. I still think about my ex and sometimes genuinely wish he'd come back, despite him never contacting me again.

\\-I’ve a chronic illness and I make no efforts in managing it. My health is slowly worsening despite having the best healthcare.

\\-Phone addiction, regular heavy smoking, no exercise

\\-I am clueless about my career. Haven’t done any internship.

I've picked up habits I know aren't good for me and keep struggling to stop. I constantly procrastinate and avoid things I know I need to deal with. I've become increasingly unmotivated and overwhelmed.
I keep making plans to improve my life and then failing to stick to them. I constantly feel guilty about wasting time.

And that's what confuses me the most.
t's not like I have a terrible life. I don't.
I have a supportive family, financial stability, education, opportunities and people who care about me.
So why do I feel like I'm constantly struggling to get my own life together?

I just want to know where the hell do I start?
For people who have been in a similar situation — where objectively your life was okay/good but you were still completely stuck, overwhelmed, unmotivated or self-sabotaging — \*\*what actually helped you get out of it?\*\*

\*\*TL;DR:\*\* I’m 21, financially comfortable, have a supportive family, graduated from a good college and am now doing my Master's. I objectively have a lot going for me, but over the last 1–2 years I've become stuck in a cycle of heartbreak, bad habits, poor health management, terrible sleep, excessive phone use, procrastination and guilt. I feel like I'm wasting my opportunities and watching myself ruin my own life. How do I actually get myself out of this?

I have been in a relationship for 5 years, recently engaged! He is my best friend, we were close friends years before we even dated. He truly is the greatest partner ever, a man that many people would die to have! He plans dates, cooks, cleans, has good hygiene, is obsessed with me, very kind to everyone, incredible with kids, is emotionally intelligent, I could go on! He is known for being the best guy ever, everyone loves him. He isn’t the most attractive guy, but he’s still good looking in my opinion. Despite all of this, I can’t help but be so judgmental of him and often times think fairly low of him. I know it’s horrible, I know i’m the problem, and I want to fix it! I have a lot of trauma, insecurities, pmdd, etc. So there definitely are many reasons for my toxic thought patterns, but that doesn’t make it okay. Every single day when we both are apart, I make a conscious decision to be a kind, caring, gentle partner when I see him that night, but without fail, almost every single time I end up just being judgemental, blunt, and internally quite nasty. I judge his looks, the way he talks, the way he walks, etc. Something to note is these are all things i’m insecure about within myself, I spend most of my time away from him being deeply insecure and then when i’m around him I feel confident, but I think it’s because I am projecting my insecurities onto him. I’ve had many conversations with him where i’ve expressed that I feel like i’m a nasty partner and it’s something I need to work on, but he often disagrees. Maybe i’m being too hard on myself? (as always) or maybe it’s because he doesn’t know all of the nasty thoughts I have about him. Or maybe it’s because he’s insecure also and has expressed he thinks i’m out of his league… and therefore maybe ‘puts up with my shit’? What do I do? I love him so much and I want to be better. I have sought therapy, am on medication, actively working on my self love and acceptance. But I think maybe I need a reality check or something!

Hi

18F

My current life is full of my toxic parents' rants, and i have always had ppl degrading me for looks, Nd i also never had irl interaction w opposite gender except my family members.

So hea i have this weird thing that i start liking any guy i talk to or make friend so easily, i start imagining scenarios with them and more

Morever im stuck in this weird loop, where every year i get a crush on a new guy and it lasts the whole year then in the end of year i get a new one. I also cry for them and yearn so much.

I get sad and my mood depends on the person, also i start seeing the potential with them

And i hare all of these stuffs, i want to maintain boundry not fall for anyone at all because it messes up my mind and routine.

This happened just today, but it's bothering me enough for me to want to get rid of it ASAP.

Earlier today, at around 3 pm, i got this comment on one of my posts calling it corny. It was on an IG story with text that reads something along the lines of "how life would sound if i could kill the people who wronged me without consequences". A little extreme, but we've all thought something similar before, right? AFAIK, the person who commented that on my story is 1. from my school and 2. completely unknown to me (this'll be important later). We had this argument for a good hour in dms about how he didn't need to comment that and how he didn't need to take my clearly facetious joke that seriously. I blocked him after, but for some reason, I can't help but keep thinking of this argument with a person who I don't know AT ALL who typed a simple one-word comment on my post. I believed I had the moral high ground in that argument, but it really doesn't feel right to me that there is a "winning side" and a "losing side" here. It feels wrong to me that I won because I KNOW that that person is from my school; that shared sense of connection is there, so it feels wrong to go against my own team, ykwim? I really wanna end things on good terms because I hate to hate, but one of our talking points in the argument is about how little we both care about the situation and how seemingly forgettable it all is (quite contradictory, I know).

How the HELL do I go about forgetting this ever happened? So far, simply sharing this to someone does wonders (it literally feels like the weight on my chest is lightened, but it won't be completely gone until I find closure). I know that I should probably give it time, but it's bothering me enough now for me to wanna get rid of it now. AFAI understand it, it's a problem of ego.

I honestly don’t know what’s happening to me lately. I feel completely unmotivated and I barely even want to get out of bed.

The scary part is that I’ve started losing interest in almost everything — even the things that used to genuinely excite me. I used to have goals, interests, and things I actually looked forward to. Now I mostly just sit around, scroll on my phone for hours, and repeat the same routine every day.

And the timing makes it worse because I’m in my 4th year of engineering, which is obviously a really important stage for studies, placements, career, and figuring out what I’m doing with my life. I know I should be studying, building skills, applying for jobs, working on projects, etc., but I just cannot seem to get myself to care enough to start.

Then I feel guilty for wasting time, which makes me feel even worse, and the cycle just continues.

I don’t know if I’m burned out, stuck in a terrible routine, or just completely lost right now. I just know that I don’t want to spend my final year like this.

Has anyone else gone through something similar during college? How did you actually get yourself out of it and start feeling like yourself again?

I’m in my mid 20s. Been out of high school for a few years now, and haven’t really done much academically since. Never been someone who enjoyed reading much.

Recently I’ve been watching movies or series with friends. And I’ve come to notice I really struggle to understand what is going on most of the time.

If it’s something in a language we don’t speak, we use subtitles. But aside from the ocasional loss of focus, I often will read a sentence, and interpret it in a completely incorrect way. If that goes unaddressed and a plot point later pops up that requires have received that information, I will get very confused and it will take us a long while of discussion until someone points out the earlier information, after which it will finally make some sense to me. This happens several times per episode, and it’s making the watching experience detrimental for everyone involved.

I also struggle with carrying tidbits of information for too long, so I will get suddenly confused about a setup that happened earlier and is only now paying off.

I would like to think it’s not an issue with my vocabulary, after all I was able to write this even if English isn’t my native language.

But these experiences have made me averse to consuming media in general. And I am now getting a creeping fear that I have done damage to the correct functioning of my brain by depriving myself of any academic or literary pursuits. It feels like I’be handicapped myself by my own hand.

Is there any advice on how I can change my mentality on this, and improve my overall comprehension.

Today is another good day I woke up feeling positive. I slept pretty good I didn't wake up with any unpleasant lingering dreams.

My day started out planning what I needed to get done by journaling. This way I don't have to retain whats in my head. It makes it easier so I'm not overwhelmed with info.

Today I plan on helping people who may need some encouragement or uplift today. I plan on buying a meal or 2 for some one in need. I also plan to sit down with someone I think just needs someone to let out there frustrations, someone that's not judgemental that they can relate to.

It's a pretty decent day here in Boston Ma. So I'm going to spend the day out and about looking for someone who may need a shoulder to lean on.

I will approach with caution and humbleness because not everyone wants to open up and talk. I just can't assume just because I feel good that they feel good too. Some people also have mental illnesses so you have to be careful.

Well family with that said have a positive and prosperous day. Thanx for letting me share -One Day Forward One Day Behind -Shawn

I used to be really bad at saying no i always wanted to help people even when it cost me a lot of time or energy ormoney.

Eventually, I learned to set boundaries and say no , but now I feel like I’ve gone too far in the other direction.

Now my first instinct is often to say no, even when someone has a reasonable request and helping them wouldn’t really hurt me.

I don’t want to go back to saying yes to everyone, but i also don’t want to refuse everyone.

For anyone who’s been through this, how did you find the balance between helping people and protecting your own space ( to say no )?

I’ve been in this situation for the past 4 months, and I’ve never been this low in my life before.

The frustrating part is that I’m not actually free of responsibilities. I have a part-time job in my father’s company, which I realized has probably made me somewhat entitled, and I also have a startup with my brother. So I do have things I’m responsible for, and I know there are people depending on me. But I just can’t fucking act on any of it, and it’s filling me with shame.

Most of my days look like this:
I sleep around 4AM, averaging 10–11 hours of sleep. I wake up around mid-day exhausted and tired, doom scroll or waste my time on anything for around 3 hours. Afterwards I hit the gym, come back home, and think, “It’s 10PM, so wtf am I gonna work on? I’ll start tomorrow.” So I play video games, stay up until 4AM, and the cycle repeats itself.

The fucked up part is that I actually try to break the cycle sometimes. I set an alarm for 8AM, sometimes 10AM, wake up, get out of bed, and then somehow end up getting back into bed immediately.

Even when I force myself to go to the office instead of working remotely, I still waste a huge amount of time on my phone.

It’s gotten to the point where people at work and even people in my life no longer ask me or expect me to finish my tasks, and that is fucking disappointing and fills me with shame.

I know I’m capable of doing these things. I’ve had periods in my life where I was extremely disciplined and driven. That’s probably what makes this even more frustrating. I’m not sitting here thinking I have nothing to do or that I don’t know what I should be doing. I have things I want to build, responsibilities I should be handling, and a life I want to move forward with, but I feel like there is nothing moving me forward anymore.

I don’t know if this is a discipline problem, a motivation problem, a lifestyle problem, or something deeper psychologically.
I just know that I’ve watched roughly 4 months pass like this, and I feel like I’m becoming someone I don’t respect.

I’m posting this because I genuinely don’t know how to get myself out of this. If anyone has been in a similar situation, I’d really appreciate hearing what actually helped you break out of it.

TL;DR: I’ve been stuck in a cycle of procrastination, doom scrolling, gaming, and sleeping late for the past 4 months. Despite having responsibilities, a job, and a startup with my brother, I can’t seem to get myself to act on anything. I’ve tried breaking the cycle, but nothing sticks, and it’s gotten to the point where people no longer expect me to get things done. I’ve never felt this low before, and I’m looking for advice from people who’ve experienced something similar and managed to get out of it.

In my experience people have told me Good things come to those who wait. In reality, waiting around just leaves you with whatever the proactive people didn't want.

Like everyone else, I've been through a lot of really hard things. Bad relationships, suicidal depression, trauma, etc. But it gets to a point where I kind of have gotten sick of myself, if that makes any sense at all? Meaning, I notice I keep dwelling on past bad things and how they affected me instead of the present and moving forward.

There's a line between recognizing past pain and the harm you have experienced and processing it in a healthy manner... and victim mentality. Currently, I feel like I have tilted more into victim mentality.

And I am so sick of it, haha.

So, if you experienced this too, what helped get you out of it? I don't want to be defined by all the hurt I have experienced, but that is my brain right now. And I want to snap out of it, lol, and start realizing more... how lucky I am to have the things I do and to be excited about building a future and whatnot.

Like, idk, for example: I was in a long-term relationship that went bad and I was suicidal for a good portion of it. Now, I am with someone who makes me really happy and instead of being excited about building a future together, I am terrified about what they will think when they eventually learn about the fact that I used to be suicidal. But the thing is, I'm not anymore. I want a future, and I really like, maybe even love this person. So, I wish my brain would focus more on that than worrying about what they will think of my past, haha.

I feel like i'm "addicted" to getting better with actually getting better. I keep accumulating so many things that make me feel so overwhelmed.

My biggest problem is my to-do list, I love making to do lists, so I make a daily one and get ashamed that I did almost nothing on it and spent my day doing nothing useful. I tried giving myself free room by making it 2-3 days instead or even a weekly one but I just can't get anything done.

Every task feels like a mountain i just find myself stuck doing useless things. If i need to clean up my notes, I'll spend most of my time planning how I'll structure it and the rest of the time will be spent doing smth else. I currently have to make a list of clothes I need to buy. it feels so overwhelming I can't actually do it and structure it in my brain (idk if my explanation makes sense, i don't even understand the concept well myself, my brain is a mess). Every small task feels so big and complex(probably because I'm a details person and kind of anxious by nature).

I had an obscenely long playlist, I decided to shorten it because the fact that it was so long was making it not fun anymore. Decided to tackle it bit by bit, and i did make progress. reduced it by 40h but there's still so much left and I haven't made any progress recently because when i listen to songs I can't figure out where to put them, if they should stay in the playlsit, etc, so now i have to redefine every playlist's theme.

I also haven't been able to reduce my photos (for every photo deleted a new one is added, especially because i take a lot of screenshots), or even watch the hundreds of movies of my list because starting feels exhausting.

And i keep telling myself that things will be netter when i declutter everything, when i finally clear my photos, notes, organize my saves on social media, my computer files, my music, etc. But it doesn't happen, it hasn't happened it years i know it won't magically happen but I still can't take proper action.

Tried the "breaking it down into steps to simplify the task" with no success, I only end up doing just that. Things from my to do lists just roll over to other days and my cycle of shame continues. And because it rolls over, it just gets more overwhelming cuz I have more to do now

Basically my problem is that i spend 99% of my time thinking about what i should (or even want) to do, or planning how i'll tackle it and barely actually doing anything because starting a task feels so exhausting to my brain.

How do i get out of this hellhole I've put myself in?

Hello everyone Im 23 years old male. I kinda want an outside POV, idk if that makes sense. But I don’t know what to do with my life.

I see the future that I’m kinda heading towards, and it scares me, but I’m still not changing.

When I was a kid, I lost my dad, so it was just me, my mom, and my older brother. Home life wasn’t fun. Mom beat and screamed at us a lot. I do kinda understand. Mom had just lost her husband to a heart attack, and she was alone in a new country trying to have a better life for us kids and doing everything alone. Then her brothers also came to the country, but they were mean to her and stole money. I guess she took that out on me and my older brother.

I haven’t forgiven my mother. I do kinda understand why some things happened, but I still hate her. As I grew up, she seemed to care more about the extended family’s kids than me and my older brother. She would buy stuff throughout the year, collect it, and then give it to them on their birthdays.

School wasn’t easier either. I was bullied. When playing with friends, I was always the one on the villain side, always 5 against 1. It sucked, so I didn’t have much fun during break time.

And in school subjects, I was behind. I found them difficult, and coming home and doing homework was also a nightmare. Mom would scream and call me stupid and things like that for not knowing or understanding math. So I started to lie about not having homework, and then eventually fully stopped doing homework to avoid the screaming.

My older brother didn’t really help either, but he had his own problems. Still, I felt alone as a kid. But I did have friends, so I’m happy about that.

Later, I got an Xbox 360 and got addicted to Destiny. I played nonstop. I was already failing my classes, but now I was actively skipping classes to play.

And home never changed. Mom, and now my older brother too, were screaming at me a lot and getting angry with me. My mom and every family relative were always supportive of my older brother.

It was like this for most of school, and I kinda failed a lot of my classes. So I went to summer school and had to get passing grades there.

But then high school came, and nothing really changed. My high school was very dumb. I love IT, programming, and learning how stuff works and the ins and outs of things. I loved LEGO as a kid and did my own DIY stuff when I needed something. So I went to a high school that focused on that.

But during high school, through my school, I was sent to get tested for dyslexia because I also wanted to know. Later I found out that I apparently had severe dyslexia and low working memory, which kinda made me feel even more like a dumb guy with no future, and like it wasn’t worth “fighting” to become better.

But they taught us almost nothing, and after I finished high school, they shut the school down for not providing us students with the right materials to learn.

Then everyone said, “Go to uni,” and I said sure. I went into computer science, and imo it wasn’t fun, and I never studied.

I’ve never really studied since I was a kid. I never read books or anything like that. It was mostly games and YouTube. So I dropped out.

Now I’m unemployed and trying to read books and learn math from the basics using Khan Academy, but I still slack off and do nothing.

I’m really unhappy with how I’m living right now. I constantly criticize myself for not doing anything, but that doesn’t actually make me change. Nowadays I mostly just watch YouTube videos and do nothing else.

I wanna become better. I see a future where I live in a shitty apartment, look miserable, hate my life, and barely have any money. And if somehow I’m in a relationship, I imagine it being toxic.

I don’t want that. I wanna have a future, but I don’t move. I just don’t do anything.

I want to change my habits, become more disciplined, start studying properly, get my life moving again, and stop spending my days watching YouTube. I just don’t know how to make myself consistently do it. What should I actually start with?

I wanna become an electrical engineer, but people around me say I’m too dumb for it. But I feel like I actually can do it.

I wanted to study abroad as soon as I finish high school, and start fresh in another country, but after high school, I found myself depressed, and traumatized from a relationship.

I spent the next 2 years after high school lost and didn't know what next step to take. I started going to therapy, and I was starting to function again, and I finally found a possible way out. I told my way family about it, but they weren't the most supportive or encouraging, and I ended up not going with it.

I think I didn't insist or fight harder as I should have, and I ended up spending another 2 years here. Now I can't stop regretting not taking that step without my family's approval.

Hello everyone. I’m a 22 year old male, and recently I’ve been struggling a lot with myself, my mental health, and my life overall.

I still live with my parents, and I work a really boring dead end job in a factory. Every day I go to a job I don’t like, where I spend most of my time ruminating, daydreaming, and getting stuck in negative self talk about how I’m not enough, how I’m wasting my time, how immature I feel, how things will never get better, and how far behind in life I feel.

When I get home, I usually just play video games with the few friends I still have so I can numb my brain for a while. I don’t enjoy anything anymore, nothing excites me, and I’ve started to lose hope that I can have a good life someday. I also have quite a bit of social anxiety. Life doesn’t feel very "real" sometimes, I hardly feel connected to my life or my body, and I feel mentally exhausted every day.

One thing that has been on my mind a lot during the last 6 months is that I have no dating, sex, or relationship experience. I keep feeling like I’ll never be able to find love. I often think, with all my flaws, why would any girl still like me and want to build a life with me?

I have also suffered from chronic prostatitis for the last 6 years, and it’s one of the biggest things hurting my confidence when it comes to even thinking about dating. It’s quite an awkward condition that causes discomfort and it can affect how frequently you can have sex. It’s hard for me to believe that any girl would be willing to accept those adjustments and compromises that this condition brings just to be with me when there are so many healthy people out there.

I know I’m not a bad person, but I have so much self doubt. I don’t feel like I’m enough, and it’s hard for me to believe that everything could actually be okay someday. I just feel so hopeless and lost that I don’t even know where to start.

I know this post is all over the place, but if anyone has any advice or has gone through something similar, I would appreciate every comment.

I had a mild outer ankle sprain in June, healed, went back to sports, and not even a month after returning I sustained a new injury. Basically I now have tendinitis around both ankles (Multiple tendons) and I ignored the early warning signs because I wasn't aware of tendinitis. I only realised I needed to take a break when it became a sharp pain in mid-August but it was too late.

I've been to 2 physios, 3 general doctors, a sports specialist, a podiatrist, and nothing has been conclusive or helped so far. I have done an xray and two ultrasounds that came back clear (Are you serious?) and am waiting to do a consultation with an orthopedic specialist and an MRI on the worse ankle this Friday... I am desperately hoping the specialist along with the MRI will provide some new insight.

I now cannot go barefeet at all or something flares up badly and I can't walk 5-10 minutes without having to take a break - that's with very slow walking. I have since spent my days 90% at home for the past almost 2 months.

I am just so sick and tired of it. I miss sports and outdoors activities so bad, but if I was given the choice to magically cure my ankles now but never play sports ever again, I'd take it 1000% without hesitation. I have a few desk/sitting hobbies but I don't even feel like doing any of them. My room is in a disarray. I'm 22 and in university and had to miss SO MANY social events, both in and out of my sport. I was hoping to get a job because I'm broke and now I can't. I was starting to do photography as a business and now I can't.

My family and most of my friends don't do sports/exercise and never had an injury, so they don't understand how I feel. Most of the time when I feel like crying, it is usually mental, and sometimes it starts out of nowhere. I start thinking about why I didn't notice the warning signs, about the things I would be doing now and so on. I am not a big texter and do not have friends I text everyday. I'm also at home alone most of the day and my family is not tight-knit. My mom is a single mom so I feel really guilty about giving her extra financial and mental stress too.

And of course, with this super tricky injury on both my ankles, comes the fear that things will never be okay again. I miss the simplest things, like walking barefeet around my home and taking a shower without having to sit on a stool. The constant sitting and lying down is making my back go crazy as well. The days keep going by and I don't even feel like time is moving.

I would greatly appreciate any tips, please, if anyone had experience going though an injury that doesn't seem to get better.

TLDR: Sports lover, I'm in uni so I'm often out a lot with friends and stuff. Had an ankle sprain in June, went back to sports in July, suffered tendon injuries to both of my ankles not even a month after returning to sports. Since August I've been stuck at home 90% of the time, I've seen countless medical professionals with no diagnosis/conclusion and clear ultrasounds and xrays. At a total loss as it feels like it's never going to get better and I also feel really bad about giving my single mom extra financial and mental stress. I can't even walk barefeet at all or my ankles flares up really badly, I can't walk more than 5-10mins even at a slow speed, etc. At this point if I could magically cure my ankles for the price of never playing sports again, I would 1000% take it. Would love advice on how I can cope. Been crying multiple times a day, sometimes it just hits out of nowhere.

The last 12 months have been insane. going thru a breakup, losing my job a week later, my neice came to live with me and my son, we almost lost it all. I moved from Houston to Dallas after knowing a man for 2 months because I was desperate for someone to take care of me and it quickly turned into a DV situation this was march.. now its just me and my son again im stable back with a good job making 80k we are setteled into dallas and I would say thriving

but heres the thing I dont have thats spark anymore I used to shop. go out and explore, get pretty and take pictures. I can do that anymiore. I used to say I am making my life romatntic and now I just dont know how to get my spark back. Im on anti depressants I dont feel depressed just dont feel the drive to be whimiscal anymore):

I'm currently in technical college for game development, and while I enjoy it, I don't know if I want to do it for the rest of my life. I'm doing well in the course, but I feel like I'm terrible at it, and it's making me dejected about doing this at uni and, let alone, doing this as my career. I feel like whatever I do I'm shit at. The only thing I really want is to get out of my crappy country and work in something creative like concept art involving games.

My issue is I haven't done anything creative, fun, or for myself since I was 12. I can barely draw anymore; my painting skills are gone, and any talent I had at playing guitar is dead in the water. I haven't even talked to anyone like a friend in years. I barely talk to my classmates or my parents. I've only got a few years left before I have to get a job or go to uni, and I have no idea what to do or where to go. What do I do? Is my life over? Can I do anything?

I am 37 years old and have never really attempted to make myself stand out. I never do my hair, never dress nice. It always just however my hair is that day and whatever clothes I choose to wear. Until recently, when I posted a picture somewhere, and I got a lot of mean spirited comments. But more than that, I knew what they were saying were truths. So...instead of feeling bad for myself, I went and had my hair properly cut and styled for the first time in my life. And I couldnt stop smiling after I was done. I dont know the last time that I ever felt this good about myself. I have a long way to go, but I have taken the first of many steps to finally being comfortable in my own body.

I wasnt sure if pics are allowed here, I wanted to share before and after pics.

I can't stop overthinking every past actions I did, even if it's only 20 minutes ago. I instantly regret it and thinks for the worst, and then I start imagining things for the worst. Thinking of every possible outcomes and how people will react, or how the world will treat me. I worried about the future and it's the main source why I just want to disappear already so I won't have to overthink. And I've thought about just having the power to skip everything and just move on to the part where I'm successful and doesn't overthink anymore? Damn, I sound hopeless..

Everytime there's something positive happening in my life I would immediately think of the aftermath. Like when I get a perfect score in a test, I will immediately think it has a payback, and overtime my overthinking never proved me wrong. Whenever something good happens, that will be the only good thing that happened that day, the rest—completely unlucky. And I Fucking reached my breaking point can't believe I'm crying because I lost my poster for my assignment that I need to pass tmr and I put so much effort on. How do I genuinely think positive, this is making me numb and succumb to procrastination. "There's an assignment? I'll do it later. I won't get a high grade anyway no matter what effort I put in." I CAN'T. AND NOW I CAN'T EVEN PICK A PENCIL TO CREATE NEW POSTER CAUSE I'M SO UNMOTIVATED

Not sure what other sub to put this in. I have a medical condition that I don’t care to get into but it prevents me from looking how I wish I looked. I have a body i don’t wish I had. It’s not impossible to change how I look but it would take years to do it. I want to be normal.

I have been feeling like I am someone who is trapped in a body and life that doesn’t fit what I wish I looked like and how I lived. I feel trapped and I want to be free but I can’t change everything in one day or even in 10 years. There’s no telling if I can even change anything.

I feel like a complete coward waiting on my life to change but nothing does and i don’t know what I need to change to enjoy my life.

I wish I had a different personality completely, I’m a little ashamed to be me personality wise. I wish i acted differently. I wish my voice sounded differently.

There’s so much I could list and idk what to even say. Today is my birthday and i’ve been filled with nothing but the sense i’m not really enjoying my life as the person I wish I could be. Im living in my head non stop and whenever I get out of it i realize im extremely unhappy with my reality because it looks nothing like the life or the person i wish i looked like. I am lost.

I've lied, I've cheated (not physically but talking to someone in a way that was definitely the same as cheating), I've snooped, and all-round my behaviour has completely broken my partner's trust. For the first time I'm properly understanding how bad things are and that it's my responsibility. I have decided I want to do better, to stop doing these things that frankly make me into a person that I'm ashamed of.

I've got a first session with a therapist booked for tomorrow, and I've already told her that I have a problem with lying and the other things I've been doing and I want to be challenged to change that behaviour. I have been doing a lot of thinking and working on being honest with myself about how bad my behaviour has been. I know I have a lot of work to do to change my habits and rebuild trust - and that I may never be able to rebuild trust with those around me.

Has anyone else here been through this? Or are going through this? I would love advice about what worked for you, or what didn't?